Ok, I need to complain a bit - the "I observe very little of the world around me" to "i get defensive after 2.5 questions" argument pipeline.
The downstairs was smoky yesterday and the wife had cooked a number of various things - dinner, she makes toddler stuff sometimes, we have a bunch of apples from apple picking on a recent trip and so there's all kinds of apple shit happening.
"Oh it's a little smoky down here, what happened"
"Huh? Nothing happened."
"Oh uhhhh ok. Just, something burned, it smells a bit too."
"yeah nothing I did"
"... ok cool."
opens oven door, observes shiny new gunk on the ground, looks around, sees a loaf pan that clearly exploded in the oven, mystery solved
I suppose that one was no big deal although it just irritates me to not be able to figure out what the fuck happened. Now that I think of it, twice I've been out of town and then have come home to be unable to get information about some house problem that has cropped up while I was gone. In our old 1980s house we had a shitty pocket door that was always a little janky but then was all of a sudden very very bad when I came back from a trip. I was assured that absolutely nothing happened and when I asked for a third time if she was certain that nothing happened at all it was an argument. That door was pseudo fucked for most of a year until I witnessed her walk into it halfway open at full speed and it started working again. More recently, there were water stains on the ceiling above the kitchen table, which is where our shower is, and I tried extremely hard to get her to understand that I didn't think she did anything wrong and didn't care if she did but I needed to know what water related thing happened in our bathroom. I got no information and an argument but recaulked near the shower and that fixed it.