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Homesickhorn

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Everything posted by Homesickhorn

  1. This is tldr, but fucking hilarious if you skip to the last paragraph.
  2. The look at me factor is such that this Instagram pic kinda pisses me off. It’s like she’s lobbing out something that’s trying to make it look like she’s attempting to appeal to girls out there with insecurities, and posting her look at me pic to show that she’s one of them. Then I realized that she’s just a stupid attention whore, and I kinda got mad at myself for not realizing that sooner.
  3. I’ll take “How a chola can anger her white boyfriend named Lewis” for $500 Alex.
  4. So is this boxing match gonna happen or not? I’ve got to let my bookie know? Once the thread bumped, I guess I over scrolled north, and stumbled into a mini-chain of some shit going down. What say the two of you?
  5. I’ve been slowly and guardedly reading this thread. The Watts daughter begging for her dad to please not do to her what he’d just done to her sister fucked me up. The video above I could’ve handled, had they not shown the picture of that little six month old boy smiling. And the fact that he lived another 8-9 hours just ices the shitcake for me. The mom and the girl who committed the act, need to go. Their constant breathing on this planet takes away oxygen from people who are actually good, want to be good, or at least trying to be good. I feel fucking sick.
  6. I’d knock on wood after that post. In hindsight, I should’ve been shot in New Orleans twice, Seattle once, and probably five times in San Antonio. I’ve lived in Houston now for upwards of 11 years, send prayers.
  7. Leave Tivy out of it. Them’s fighting words sir.
  8. It’s because of liquid smoke. And pics of Joan, because there are rules.
  9. This^^^ coupled with the fact that I don’t tweak jokes sent to me by a retired Army SF Colonel, who also happens to be my dad. I let his shit ride for the most part.
  10. From Homesickhorn Sr: A crusty old Army Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?" "Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature." The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action" "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action." The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up. Relax and enjoy yourself." The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex? "1955, ma'am" "Well, there you are No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out! I mean, no sex since 1955!" She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955." The Sergeant Major said, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."
  11. I’m not anywhere close to one of those SEC proponents. That’s aggy’s shtick. “Fuck every SEC team but mine”, is the mentality of myself, and most like me. I’m just busting balls because y’all are one of the few teams we’ve got a recent winning bowl record against, other than Tech. It’s all I’ve really got. I actually cheer for the Pokes when they’re not playing the Rebs or the Horns.
  12. This one might be one of the better ones in the last couple of weeks.
  13. I’m going to continue to remind you about the ‘04 & ‘10 Cotton Bowls and the ‘16 Sugar Bowl, as long as you keep making mouth breather comments. And we weren’t that good when we beat y’all, any of three of those games. I guess I’d be pissed too.
  14. Unfortunately, mine didn’t make it. Damn it.
  15. No kidding. That nonchalant heat that peppered the building is more ‘holy shit’ than the thousands of rounds spent missing the car.
  16. Yeah, like we (Ole Miss) have been lights out on defense as of late. All we’ve prayed for has been a shootout for the last decade. Even aggy can’t be that stu..... Actually, never mind.
  17. Oh do us a favor. I can’t, it’s against regulation.
  18. In America it’s bling bling, but out here, it’s big wang.
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