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Bernard

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Everything posted by Bernard

  1. When Joel cracked his mom’s prized glass egg, his dad sent him out rake some leaves in the back yard. Looks like your yard could use some raking. Later, when Joel’s dad found out Joel was accepted to Princeton, the whole broken egg deal was pretty much forgotten. Be like Joel’s dad. Bernard
  2. Houston San Francisco Summit County, Colorado Grand Canyon Longhorn Football Road Game City Bernard
  3. Well fuck me. Tomorrow turned into six weeks. Now I’m 40 pounds over where I was in August. Back on for real now. Started after the Super Bowl. Rolling 48 hour fasts were good to me in 2021. I’m going to give Rolling 72’s a try now. Fasted Monday and Tuesday. Had a zero carb meal on Wednesday. Fasted Thursday and Friday (today). Will eat again tomorrow. Here I am (the guy in the middle) at the Tech game in late September. 6’ 5” and maybe 230. I doubt I could button those shorts right now. Goal is to get back to 225 and beyond. Bernard
  4. I did 120 days of (mostly) Rolling 48’s (one-meal-every-other-day) in 2021. Lost 75 pounds. I gained back 45 during football season. I’m now planning a stint of Rolling 72’s. We’ll see how it goes. Just finished my first cycle with lunch today. I’ve done longer fasts too. I once went 27 days with only eating two big salads, one on Day 10 and one on Day 20. Bernard
  5. Auto lending is a huge industry. They don’t like their loan collateral being damaged and not repaired. They want as many parties as possible lined up to to pay to repair their collateral. Bernard
  6. Shit. Too late to edit my post above. I wanted to add… For the record: I asked for no such favor. It was a gorgeous Saturday AM. When informed that my car was to be impounded near Huntsville until I could show proof of registration, I just looked at my buddy standing next to on the shoulder and said, “Fuck, it we’ll rent a convertible.” I always figured the cop was just trying to fuck with me. I always thought he let me drive away because he knew I gave no fucks at all about getting towed. Now it seems the whole thing was a failed charade to try and fuck with me. Not surprised. Bernard
  7. Thanks for correcting me. I assumed one could be towed for driving with expired tags because a DPS trooper specifically told me my car was going to be towed / impounded because the registration sticker was overdue. I heard him call for the tow truck on his radio. Then he acted like he was doing me a favor by not towing the car. Typical lying cocksucker. Bernard
  8. From the Channel 2 news story link above… ”In January, deputy constables cited 1,363 drivers related to fraudulent paper license plate tags. Responding to a rise in the use of fraudulent paper license plate tags, the Harris County Toll Road Authority held an enforcement campaign across the Houston area from Jan. 15 to Jan. 31. Through the collaborative effort – various precincts are responsible for traffic enforcement along their segment of HCTRA roads – deputies made 19 arrests, cleared 81 open misdemeanor and felony warrants and had 115 vehicles with fake tags or title issues towed.” Seriously, why wasn’t each and every vehicle towed??? Cops literally can’t do anything right. Bernard
  9. Crooks love the ability to drive an untraceable car. Poors love saving on pesky insurance and registration fees. I wonder though, how many of these paper plate cowboys are doing it to avoid the repo man? License plate scanners changed the game for repo men a while back. They used to have to hunt down cars at probable addresses where the deadbeats “might” be parking. Plate scanners connected to database of cars on the repo list meant repo peeps could just drive the streets fishing for a hit, and a payday. A paper plate can easily make your car payments go away too. It’s a whole lot harder trying to find a car using only the VIN. The DMV obviously did not care about the fake plate issue. I wonder if behind the scenes, some auto lenders are helping push these news stories into the public conversation. Wall Street securitizes billions in auto loans. I’m sure they don’t like it when their only collateral becomes hard to trace. Bernard
  10. That’s my good buddy Wade. I sat directly in front of him. We both used to have tickets in 30, but not together. We moved to 31 to get our seats together. He had four in row 62. I had four in row 61 directly below him. Years ago I was talking to a stranger and mentioned Section 31. His first question was, “Where do you sit in relation to Drunken Shirtless Guy?”. Bernard
  11. That seems like a MAJOR upgrade. Row 6 is WAY too low for corner seats. Row 6 is too low even on the 50. You’ll have a much better view of the filled. Bernard
  12. So you want the moon towers built back? Bernard
  13. Wow. That’s some real fine detective work right there. Good to know the Pharr PD is on the job and keeping us all safe. Bernard
  14. I did the same with all of mine three years ago. I can’t give you a how-to, but it was very easy, even though the base plates had to be replaced too. The replacement units I bought all came with several different adapters in each package to match the actual alarm device with the existing wiring in the wall of a 1994-built house. Bernard
  15. I was in Section 31 Row 61 for a LONG time. Got moved like many others a couple years ago to the exact same seats on the north end, Section 26, Row 61. I got the call from Bellmont the other day. Now being moved to Section 30, Row 58, so an upgrade, I guess. I was told band was moving to Section 18. Section 31 used be awesome. Sadly, now it’s a shadow of its former self. I pay a $150/year donation for four seats. Used to be LOTS of fans in their late 20’s and 30’s. Same faces every week, year in year out. So many fun times. Then after a good run in the 2000’s, the donation level is up to $2,200/year, which NO ONE is paying. As season ticket holders steadily dropped out by natural attrition over the years, they have NOT been replaced. Guy who called me said a whole bunch of tickets near me are now given to former Lettermen, who are obviously selling them on StubHub every week, or at least going to sit somewhere else. Lame. Same situation will move to Section 30 this fall. Bernard
  16. I might do the same in similar circumstances, but still… you can’t just look the other way at vigilantism in a civilized society. Also, we have a lot of citizens in this country who like to spout their love of the US Constitution, but you can’t go around demanding your 2nd Amendment (or other) Constitutional rights if you’re ready to deny other citizens their Constitutional rights on the the privately uttered words of nine year old. Bernard
  17. Yes. Quite possibly. Ricky was signing (and reading) my copy of Lincoln Star-Journal newspaper from the day after Texas snapped Nebraska’s 47-game home winning streak. Brian Jones was there chilling. He’s who invited me in the room. I mentioned to Priest that a friend of mine was the (then) VP of KC Chiefs. He didn’t seem to care. Maybe Priest was like surgeon and didn’t want to risk injuring his hand so soon after signing his big contract extension. Maybe he was slighted that I only asked Ricky for an autograph. Maybe he just hates tall people. I don’t hold it against him. He was fun to watch. Being in the stands at 1996 B12 Championship is a moment I’ll never forget. 🙂 Bernard
  18. Met him at Ricky Williams Super Bowl party in 2004. Tried to shake his hand. He refused. Struck me as odd. Dude could run and jump though. Bernard
  19. Some of y’all don’t even know… speed limit was 55MPH everywhere when I started driving Houston to Austin on the reg in 1987. Every single Houston Longhorn I know got at least one ticket on 71 between Ellinger and Smithville. That stretch was manned nearly 24/7. Nothing but a cash cow. Fucking pigs. ‘And anyone who drove 290 instead of 10/71 is not a Houston Longhorn. 🙂 Bernard
  20. USFL player budget is zero. Players won’t be paid. Travel budget seems to be zero too. All Houston Gamblers games will be played in Birmingham, Alabama. Bernard
  21. Well… fuck. It’s hard to teach a yo-yo new tricks. Lost 75 lbs. in the spring and summer. Gained 35 back other the course of the football season. Thanks a lot, Sark. New year is here though. Ready to get the yo-yo falling again. Back on track tomorrow. Bernard
  22. They were trolling the Seattle fans with all that glorious SUN!!!!!! Bernard
  23. Times sure have changed… 1941 - Japanese attack Pearl Harbor. Uncle Sam goes to war with Japan. 2001 - Saudi Arabians attack NYC and DC. Uncle Sam goes to war with Afghanistan and Iraq. Bernard
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