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Prepuce of Doom

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Prepuce of Doom

  1. You've probably got time to crank it in the living room another time or two.
  2. Yeah, probably. But fuck him in the goatass nevertheless.
  3. I recognize the hypocrisy, but I think it's bullshit that he played long enough to get the record and then shut it down. You want the record? Play the whole fucking game with the teammates who helped you break it in the first place. Want to avoid risk of injury? Don't play at all, and announce it ahead of time like everyone else does.
  4. I'm disappointed that there hasn't been a camera trained on Cam Ward the entire final drive and in the immediate aftermath of the loss. I hope his draft position is affected.
  5. The fuck are those 1980s losers eating?
  6. I prefer the window to the aisle, but I will absolutely trade my window for your aisle to help accommodate. Anyone who asks a stranger to trade their aisle or window for a middle can get fucked.
  7. He just heard Mrs. Doom say "shitshow" in the other room and turned to look at me for my reaction. I told him she was allowed to say that today (while I don't know the context, it has been one shitshow after another hosting her family all day/week) and he said, "I know, I just thought she was more family friendly."
  8. It's the Montana family Christmas card.
  9. I look forward to when Doomlet comes of age and can be trusted with the one-cut-per-gift wrapping technique. Never cut sideways - only parallel to the roll itself, and always coast to coast...
  10. Removing the paper backing from the sticky portion of gift wrapping bows. Baby Jesus in a Manger Fucking Christ.
  11. And so many of them (as well as many others that don't portray their customers as morons, but which are also fundamentally unprofessional and idiotic) are advertisements for insurance companies of all things - the very last sort of institution that should ever want to be intuitively associated with such rampart buffonery.
  12. First few uses of a new toothbrush.
  13. Not with my league's oddball scoring.
  14. A Karen/Xenomorph collab.
  15. Need help with my QB indecision. Half PPR. Burrow or Baker? Either way, I will have significant potential for "double dipping" between the QB and receiving target(s) - Burrow and Chase, or Baker and Evans + McMillan (with a "consolation prize" of McLaughlin for those TB drives that end with a FG). Bengals are barely on the bubble for the playoffs, while the Bucs are solidly in the hunt, and still have a ~65% chance of making the playoffs even with a loss this week, according to NFL.com. Finally, Burrow is playing outside in Cincinnati (predicted high of 34, 4 mph winds) while Baker is playing indoors at Jerry World. Thoughts?
  16. Just had to change my entry name in the Bowl Mania contest after he asked me why his entry name was "Doomlet" and what was the meaning of my entry name - "$30 Prepuce." I told him that they were randomly generated, but I don't know whether he bought it. Separately, it should come as no surprise that he got a real charge out of @IPoopOnWhoop 's entry name, even if he doesn't understand the "whoop" aspect.
  17. While speaking with her, he referred to Mrs. Doom's boobs as her "jiggling physics."
  18. Keeping the dream alive!!! I really hope he has managed to convince some of his classmates. I'll try to extract this information and will report any amusing revelations.
  19. Rolex encroaching on the Invicta market.
  20. I would also settle for eaten by rats.
  21. Wordle 1,279 5/6 🟩⬛⬛⬛🟨 🟨🟨⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🙂 Daily Quordle 1060 7️⃣8️⃣ 3️⃣5️⃣ m-w.com/games/quordle/ ⬜⬜🟨⬜⬜ ⬜⬜🟨🟨⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨 ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜🟩⬜ ⬜⬜⬜🟩⬜ ⬜⬜⬜🟨⬜ ⬜⬜🟨🟩⬜ ⬜⬜⬜🟨⬜ ⬜🟩⬜🟩🟩 ⬜🟨⬜⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 ⬜🟨⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 ⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨 ⬜⬜🟨⬜⬜ 🟨🟨⬜⬜⬜ 🟨⬜🟨🟨⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 ⬜🟨⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ 🟨⬜🟨🟩🟩 ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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