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Scheiss Meister

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Scheiss Meister

  1. From tinderbox dry south Brazos County TEXAS!!!
  2. "High ranking position in the military" = E-4 or O-1, maybe O-2.
  3. You paint the most vivid word pictures. Just stunning.
  4. If I'm the thinker around here, we're all proper screwed.
  5. Perhaps for some of the Haitians, who may be more comfortable with French?
  6. Brent Venables invented the coolapeño.
  7. Brent Venables thinks Russian bots are underrated.
  8. "Nobody likes you, Booster!" "Yeah, nobody likes you!"
  9. I'm still trying to wrap my mind around how this silly fuck made corporal in the Marine Corps. I was in during the personnel problems after Vietnam, and I never saw a corporal as utterly incompetent as this disloyal bastard.
  10. Didn't @Walden Ponderer move up that way several years ago? I hope that he and his family are ok.
  11. That's not weird and creepy. Not at all. s\off
  12. Not the greatest movie, but I loved Dame Maggie in "Keeping Mum". She was a, shall we say, different sort of Mary Poppins. And of course pulled it off flawlessly.
  13. From well named Nastysota... TEXAS!!!
  14. From Vernal, Utah, on the road home to TEXAS!!!
  15. From the not so sunny wilds of Oregon TEXAS!!!
  16. I wish I had some of the grape jelly from the old C-rats. Being in the reserves, we did a lot of 2 and 3 day field exercises where we had to jam a lot of training into a little time. I would eat a tin of C-rat peanut butter on the Thursday before going into the field, and it would stop me right up for a couple of days. No shitting in the woods and running to catch up for Lcpl Scheiss! Sunday afternoon when we got back to the reserve center, I would eat a tin of the grape jelly. About 8:00 that night I would take a long, productive dump. It worked very well for me. Like you said, balance. A salad with supper last night and another for lunch today and I have a nice, empty gut. I ain't the Scheiss Meister for nothing.
  17. I'm traveling by car, so no laxatives. Fiber is working, though. Juuust right.
  18. Fuck constipation, and fuck Neptune's kiss.
  19. From final preparations for my latest adventure... FIGHT!!!
  20. I don't understand why every chief wasn't busted to seaman and discharged, and I don't understand why none of the "investigating" officers haven't been fired. How much brain power does it take to figure out that there has to be an external antenna, and it has to be on the very top of the ship? Yet no one looked for the antenna on the exterior of the ship? I think some of the officers were in on it, too.
  21. Hey Navy! You drive the fucking boat and let the Marines do the rifle work, ok? Good lord!
  22. I imagine that the stop motion/claymation industry had a huge downturn when Peter Gabriel stopped making videos.
  23. Fuck them, too. They should have kept that murder kitty out of my neighborhood.
  24. Fuck all of that. If I saw that happening in my neighborhood, my camera wouldn't come out until there were 2 or 3 .30-06 rounds in that cat's carcass and it wasn't moving.
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