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Your Mom

Certifiably Surly
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  1. I'm tired of Jason Kelce. Fuck him.
  2. You're a fucking idiot. People eat themselves into diabetes and heart disease everyday. Many types of cancer are directly from your life choices.
  3. Yeah, our crack secondary has a way of making guys look good.
  4. Kamario Taylor is legit. He was a 4-star, and top 10 quarterback nationally, depending on which recruiting weirdos you believe. He should’ve been starting most of the season. Blake Shapen is awful and has been all year and last year.
  5. That’s ok, I’m not out here to race grandma for pink slips.
  6. I had a ‘78 Z. That thing was so much faster than an 18 year old me should have been trusted with. Hit 130+ a couple times because I was an idiot back then. You could spin the tires a second time with the shift from 1st to 2nd. I’ve been digging the new ones that have brought that classic shape back around. They don’t get the best reviews but I’d own one just for the nostalgia.
  7. If you’ve ever encountered an old guy out there who corrects you when you call it Drip or Drippin’ and politely informs you that the town has a perfectly beautiful name and that there’s no need to shorten it to something that sounds like your goddamn venereal disease, tell him I said Hi. That’s my old man. He bought land there in the 1970’s and it was our weekend getaway until he moved there full time 25 year ago. He loved it for a long time but it’s not the same little place it was before. “Bro-dozers, red hats, and fake shit-kickers” (not sure… I never ask). He had enough and just recently moved away and put the place on the market.
  8. It's not their job to fare better against our schedule. It's ours, and we failed to do so. Nor can we pretend we'd have magically fared better against their schedules. Maybe. Maybe not. Who cares. Beat Florida.
  9. The deadline was extended and UT is fighting to keep its status with the compact secret. https://www.dailysignal.com/2025/11/19/exclusive-trump-extends-deadline-for-universities-to-sign-higher-education-compact/ https://www.insidehighered.com/news/government/politics-elections/2025/11/21/public-universities-dont-want-discuss-compact
  10. No. I’d rather miss the playoffs than be that kind of whiny high maintenance bitchass team that handles adversity the way a middle school girl handles drama. If we miss the playoffs we should blame ourselves and next time don’t lose to bad teams like Florida.
  11. Jesus. Don’t be a pussy. If we don’t get in the playoffs it’s not because we lost Ohio State by 7. It’s because we lost to Florida and got fucking embarrassed by Georgia. If you’d rather be playing teams like Samford, there’s a team down the road you might like to align with. The solution isn’t to dumb down the schedule, it’s to get better. We played Michigan last year and Alabama out of conference the year before and it worked out just fine for us in a more selective playoff. Ohio State opened their season against the number one team in the nation and it has worked out just fine for them. The fact that we had a down year this season isn’t an indictment on the whole philosophy of playing hard teams.
  12. I'm not up to speed on the code words they used so maybe can you tell us which part of that email says Jeffries was fucking kids or sucking Bill Clinton's dick?
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