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MaybeACoordinator

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Everything posted by MaybeACoordinator

  1. Realistic representations of Houston had quite a year with this and Mo.
  2. These are my people ancestrally and we carried it across the water in many ways. I loved it but thought the Derry Girls was even better.
  3. No way in hell she would have gotten me in any car acting that way -- it is so obvious she is begging for a dickin' right then and there. I'm throwing her over my shoulder, carrying her upstairs and tossing her on the bed. Once we got that out of the way we could go to dinner and I'd even let her drive.
  4. I followed a case like this about ten years ago: guy was a meteorologist for BP, big house up in Kingwood, two kids, reasonably hot wife, seemed normal on social media, lots of old friends, and WHAM -- busted one day in possession of / distributing enough kiddy porn to send him to prison for several decades. (He must have been some kind of kingpin or the shit must have been really vile or both) His wife had some bullshit job so she had to fend for herself and the kids after that. Around that same time there was another case up in Highland Park where it was the woman who was into kiddy pornt and apparently hubs did not know. So...as the late great Houston Astro Joaquin Andujar once put it "There is a word in English for things like this and that word is junebberknow"
  5. Been there, done that. I got really annoyed at how much phone time jail dude got; it was fucking up me fucking his girl. (This was in the landline days)
  6. Love icon for "agreeance" and not for the situation...She was born a few years after my son and before my daughter and had a girl-crush on him and babysat her. She was born into a bad marriage with a dad who lost himself in his career and a mom who is crazy AF. I don't know the whole situation but I was told she is a "defiant" fentanyl addict.
  7. Anecdotal and small sample size but I know a young Austin woman (who grew up with my kids in Houston) who very much seeks out fentanyl specifically. Slow-motion, horrible train wreck in action. And if you listen to Bob Forrest's Don't Die podcast, there are very many twentysomethings like her.
  8. Answering this against my better judgment, but overuse of antibiotics helps train diseases to fight said medicines and kill us with more efficiency. Opiates don't do that -- in fact, pure opiates are not that bad for your body at all, aside from the risk of addiction and overdose. Cocaine messes with your heart and nervous system, alcohol destroys your liver and kidneys, benzos are similiar, but the danger of opiates does not come from what they do to your internal organs but from how they rewire your brain.
  9. People who want an excuse to get day-drunk on a Sunday morning = the entirety of the fanbase.
  10. Probably...but my best friend's dad got Lewy Body in his 50s without playing a down. It's terrifying.
  11. He was my role model as a football player and a human. I will carry my love of Earl Campbell to the grave. Like many in his generation, my son is not a football fan, but I showed him Earl's highlights and his mind was blown.
  12. Absolutely true. The key with Parisians is to at least try to speak a little French, to not assume they all speak English. They almost always do, but they appreciate you making the effort to fit in. Londoners are just dicks. Chattanooga's natural setting is easily the prettiest east of the Rockies. It's almost like Bavaria or the Alps. As for diversity of cuisine, I lived in two cities in a shitty part of England (Preston and Blackpool in Lancashire) and even 25 years ago it was decent. As everyone knows there's killer Indian to be had. What surprised me was that in Blackpool of all places, our neighborhood Chinese takeaway was amazing -- to this day, some of the best Chinese I've ever had, and I've had many a meal in Houston's Chinatown. In Preston, the local kebab place (run by an emigre from Soviet Georgia) was likewise incredible -- time and time again I risked mad cow disease for that dude's beef/lamb mixed kebab. The pizza sucked, but that's mainly because the English have shitty taste in toppings -- tuna, corn, pineapple -- than any flaws with the dough or whatever. There was decent Italian aside from those subpar pies though; Preston also had McDonald's, KFC (the first in England, as a bronze plaque attests), and an American bistro if you wanted comfort food from home, and you could go native with great fish and chips or meat pies and pasties. All that made it stack up to a third-tier American city like Nashville, where I spent much of my childhood in the 70s and early 80s, and where there was exactly one Chinese restaurant, no Mexican food worthy of a return trip, terrible pizza (until some Arabs got to town), and one mediocre Italian place that the locals regarded as Michelin Starred greatness. That whole Nashville hot chicken deal was not yet invented, but man do Black Tennesseans like their BBQ hot -- there was this place called Mary's I discovered as an adult that never, ever closed (it was a front for the local numbers racket kingpin) and you paid dearly the next day for a 4AM chowdown on their 'cue. (It was kind of the Whataburger of Nashville because of those hours, but it was also in the 'hood, so there was more of a thrill in going. And I did know one dude, a cabbie, who got jacked there. They took his cab and his 'cue and he was more upset about the 'cue.) But yeah, neither in England nor Nashville did you have anything close to the diversity that Houston already had by the late 70s, but that's changing. I see recent events on the world stage have apparently sent a large number of Syrians to Preston, as there are shisha lounges all over town. Nashville now has a real barrio and you can get authentic Viet food too. Houston just continues to get more diverse -- the hottest place in town is a West African-inspired joint in Montrose. I've fairly recently sample Uighur fare, the food of the Garifuna people of Central America, Nepalese, Afghan, many regional Chinese cuisines, Mexican sushi, and hey, Houston even has solid brisket these days. If we ever arrive at true peaceful globalization it will be through food.
  13. My own youth baseball career was the reverse -- I was usually the fastest guy on the team, very strong and one of the top three hitters, and so my coaches thought I must be able to pitch too. Not only was I wild AF but my velocity probably topped out at around 75 mph even in HS. No movement on anything. I did go out on a high note -- I struck out the side against Houston's Madison HS, VY's alma mater. Three straight dudes who looked like Urkel fell to my fearsome heat.
  14. In a world where Kliff Kingsbury is an NFL head coach (for now, anyway), is the idea that Lincoln Riley could be interviewed so strange?
  15. Great-grandfather Plummer coming out of the pilot boat and headed to the wheelhouse of an oceangoing ship in or around one of the Neches River ports. He was literally the son of a son of a son of a son (however like you want to drag out that lineage) going back to Maine. His people got to Texas around 1838 via the sea and cuckoldry: his great-something grandfather somehow found himself in what is now the Lake Charles area in 1837 after a long voyage from Maine. He wrote a letter back to his brother up there that still exists -- he humblebrags on the Louisiana climate and how kickass the boat he is building is, before he gets to the meat of the matter: "Dear brother of mine, I would be eternally grateful to you if you would travel to my old home and check in on my wife and the new baby. Please mark well if the baby resembles me in any way. If it does -- good, I will send for them to join me here. If it does not, I will start a new life here and she and the baby can be supported by the baby's father." Welp, the baby did not look like my ancestor, and wasting no time, he married a local Cajun lass and had about eight kids by her. The whole family fled back to Maine in 1862 or thereabouts -- the OG Texan in this line had by then become the keeper of the Sabine River lighthouse, and Confederate partisans believed he was signaling the US Navy, and so wanted to string him up. And it was a particularly bad yellow fever year....He and the family were evacked on orders of Admiral Farragut himself, who dispatched a gunboat from New Orleans to save the Unionists of Sabine Pass. If you ever saw Cold Mountain, those Secesh Home Guards really were that bad, at least in Southeast Texas, from the Thicket down to the coast. They stayed up in Maine about 15 years -- long enough for one of his sons to marry the daughter of the same brother he'd asked to Maury Povich that baby, so this cousin-ancestor of mine wound up with a father, brother and husband with the same first, middle and last names. My grandmother is very proud of this inbreeding even now, at almost 100 years of age. She sees it as making us more like the royals. I see it as stamping me with a double dose of Golden Triangle funk I can't shake. Around 1880 the entire family migrated right back to Sabine Pass, and then spread themselves down to Bolivar and up into Beaumont and the new town of Port Arthur, most of the men becoming seafarers. The stories my grandmother told me as a kid were so bizarre I thought they had to be fairy tales but I've since seen them verified in old newspaper accounts and other documents.
  16. The clause is probably written expressly to bar the Astros.
  17. Will never ever ever get old: Merry Christmas and Happy New Year mothafuckas
  18. Not an ancestor (unfortunately) but a kinsman: I recently found out that this man and my great-grandmother were first cousins. (My dad's side of the family tends to bury the feats of the womens' families, and my ancestor who was close kin to him died kinda young): I can't golf for shit and am not in line for the book millions, but Harvey Penick is the only Longhorn sports legend I am kin to.
  19. Grandad putting dad through some baby calisthenics circa 1945
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