When daughter was a freshmen or so in high school she was babysitting our neighbor's daughter. The neighbor's had several inside dogs. The dogs got into a fight and in the ensuing melee of getting the child out of the way my daughter got nipped on her hand. I am outside working in the yard and I see my daughter calmly walking down the street holding her hand up and walking with the kid. We come inside so that I can clean it up and inspect the wound. The wife (now ex) sees it and freaks out. This is early afternoon.
Ex: She needs to go to the hospital.
Me: She will be fine.
Daughter: It is fine mom.
Throughout the day the ex constantly tells me that I should take the daughter to the hospital. Finally, to appease, her I agree.
Me: Ok, I will take her to the hospital. Let's go.
Ex: I cannot go because I am going to have dinner with a friend.
Me: OK, never mind. I will take her myself.
Get to the hospital and they ask what happened. Tell them she was bitten by a dog. Great. Now the law has to come to make a report since it was a dog bite. They have to come from the neighboring town where it happened. A solid hour plus wait. The cop shows up. We know him. He is one of two cops in our town at the time.
After explaining the event and telling him not to worry about anything.
Cop: Doesn't look too bad. Your mom make you come up here?
Daughter and I: Yes..
Cop: Well, good luck.
After more waiting. The doc comes in and inspects it.
Doc: Who cleaned up your bite and bandaged it?
Me: I did.
Doc: You did a good job. It will not require stitches are anything. I will just bandage it back up and you will be good to go as it is not too bad.
He did give her a sling so that she could rest her arm in it. After several hours away we are finally on our way home. The daughter and I scheme a plan.
When we finally get home the ex is back. The daughter walks in gingerly and is expressing a lot of pain and discomfort and is complaining about having to wear a sling for a minimum of a week. Wife sees this and freaks out.
Ex: I knew it was bad since you have been gone so long and she is in obvious pain.
Me: If you knew it was so bad why didn't you take her earlier or drop your plans and go with us? You didn't even call us while we were away to check on her.
Ex: (no words)
Daughter and I could not keep the charade up any longer because we began to laugh. Ex not happy.