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RDCanecutter

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by RDCanecutter

  1. My Dad went from throwing the football with me to running off with a diner waitress. They disappeared for 17 years. I committed fraud pretending to be him on a credit report and tracked him down in Texas. We had 20 pretty good years then he died. Now that's all done and I'm healed.
  2. If East Texas is anything like Alabama, the old fossils haven't changed (but sometimes know when to shut up) and the under-40s are comparatively enlightened. Barring Fraternity Row.
  3. Same. And the "White Supremacist" sharing with me is usually some sort of genetically stunted Care Bear that I wouldn't even let on the long boat.
  4. It's not the hard-working children's fault that Tubs was the spokesman.
  5. I haven't been able to use the app for two days now, keeps saying they are doing maintenance.
  6. You wear Under Armour? Tuberville used to shill for them. I'm gonna keep an eye on you.
  7. Did my time, ain't never goin back.
  8. Many cities are thriving but your republican brother-in-law still won't go downtown because in 1982 your uncle's cousin's friend got scared from watching a Starsky & Hutch rerun.
  9. Not saying it wouldn't work, just that you can get a better one from your local hippy crafter, for maybe 20 bucks, tops.
  10. Unless that's your fetish.
  11. Mountain North Carolina Crazy predates Trump by about 300 years. There have always been a few roads up into the holler where, yeah, you can drive your car, but don't stop and get out. Then more recently you've had new residents occasionally bringing their Florida Man ways and such. Trump probably pushed up the meter by 10%. Add it to the reasons to slap the cuffs on him.
  12. I'd be more concerned about the teenaged employee who spooged in OP's own coffee.
  13. Bratty schoolgirl tie and jacket. Muy RBD.
  14. Question for all lawyers: When I am in a bar in the afternoon, I occasionally see a mob of lawyers. drinking together. OK, so far, that makes sense. What I don't get, is why they all still have their ties on, and by "on," I mean "cinched up tighter than a noose at an Old West lynch mob where they're dragging the dude behind a horse." Splain, Loocy.
  15. Let them all run off and form a colony of Trumperados.
  16. You should never shake a baby But my baby's always shakin me... (Actual song that my band would segue into if one of the guitarists broke a string. I forget the rest.)
  17. Let him flee. It will be amusing.
  18. Chat GPT, please create the mugshot of a medium-IQ man who is convinced he's smarter than everybody.
  19. Alamo Heights. Blood in, blood out.
  20. Mrs. Canecutter has the eagle eye for lost jewelry. There are a couple of found earrings I still need to examine. In the past she has scooped up 18k gold hoops that we sold for 50 bucks. I run them through a specific gravity rig that I cobbled together way back when. It's not high-precision, but it'll sort the gold from the plated copper.
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