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RDCanecutter

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by RDCanecutter

  1. I don't speak no fancy French or nothin but if that means "Ass Whoopin" I'm in.
  2. I think we need to all get together and physically beat the shit out of each other, then, sure, I'll have a beer with you. Sorta kinda like rugby, except chuck out the more complicated rules. You can use a pistol as a club, but no shooting or stabbing.
  3. Cancer-wise we are in a zone of talking about a millimeter's growth or shrinkage of this or that tumor. One day we will call this "The Good Old Days." Lenvima is doing a stress test on my arteries, jacking up blood pressure. They've got me on four blood-control pills and it still sucks. Goes back to near-normal if I skip Lenvima, but that would be to miss the point of the assignment. Luckily my mental comfort zone is when I'm trying to make it to the green fields of England with #3 prop feathered and hydraulics lines shot out. We're fine. OH. And got a job in an art gallery. Part-time gig but a big damn deal as regards being part of society. I have 3 looks I can pull off: 1. Professor 2. Artist 3. Hobo. Usually I'm slothing around the house as #3 but I am mixing the first two for the job. Owner encourages us to work on our art so it's like having a free-rent studio with foot-traffic (next to big locally-famous restaurant) where I'm paid to hang out. Owner knows my medical deal so is like "if it's a bad day or a doctor day, just don't worry about opening up." Doesn't suck.
  4. When we gettin paid.
  5. If she wants to jump over to Alabama in a few years and grab a US Senate seat, she'll have my vote for either one.
  6. Well, I am monarchist, and I say you're king. So git to kingin'.
  7. I mean seriously, harden the fuck up, Surly.
  8. I have art shows coming up. Gonna go paint cartoon Apes waving Trans flags and listen to local right wing talk radio.
  9. It was nice, but I hope the health department cracked down on Chili's if they're birthin babies in there.
  10. That's for General Lee's Birthday.
  11. I am home now after that one breakfast beer. May not drink for the rest of the day because I am not normal.
  12. What if that prayer is answered and Trump's lawyers get smacked down?
  13. Dabo sounds like when he talks, it should come out auto-tuned.
  14. Oh, and on that Chili's thing, I know I'm early, but as a Cavalry Scout I felt that I should go check it out in advance.
  15. Voted about 11:30 in light-blue Birmingham suburb. Clicking along efficiently, I asked the poll workers how busy it was, they showed me the numbers on the machines, about double the usual. No drama, even though I cosplayed wearing my replica Union Army belt buckle. Saw one woman walk out from voting with a smile like she'd sent an abusive ex to prison. Checking Instagram later, my local artsy friends are swarming the polls, some standing in hour-long lines. Maybe all the other people in those lines are Trumpy. Maybe they aren't.
  16. My bougie neighbors probably expect to hear banjos from me.
  17. Well I gotta go slop the animals, get cleaned up, and symbolically crush fascism. Will enjoy voting in the AL 7th District this year against any would-be sneak-in House R. Catch y'all on the flip side.
  18. https://www.pinatafarm.com/p/9370f4a1-98e7-4477-ab4b-9f9774b23cad
  19. You just gave me a post-voting plan.
  20. Mrs. Canecutter swanned out the door to vote wearing her fancy beret from France. I asked her if that wasn't the same as a "Fuck Trump" tshirt. Sort of thing that might test the composure of a skinny-necked RepubliKaren. At least the city jail is a short walk away.
  21. You made the right choice to invest it whether the market goes up, down, or sideways. If you'd kept that money in cash you know you'd sober up to a whopping rent check from the marina for your new fleet of jet-skis.
  22. I have a country club story. Grandaddy loved golf and would caddy at the old course in Selma Alabama when he was a boy. He seems to have been pretty good at it and other golfers liked him. After the big war there was a new country club west of town. Grandaddy (electrician now) helped build it, in fact doing electrical work is how he paid his dues. He kept on winning golf trophies and hobnobbing with golfers from out of town. Then he got sick. Couldn't work. Country club let him know he would no longer be a member. OK, he was more busy trying to get well. There was a golf tournament and so he went to the club to see his buddies. While there, he went inside to the bathroom to take a leak. One young member gave him hell for not being a member. Grandaddy died. The last day he was alive, he took his clubs out into the front yard and knocked golf balls way out into the field across the road. Fast forward to 2023. A tornado is bearing into town from the west, knocking the tops off houses down that same road. Grandaddy's daughter, my mom, is huddled inside the house he built for his family. It skips her. About a mile farther east sits the country club, probably still has the lights running off Grandaddy's wiring. The tornado FLATTENS that place.
  23. It's one of those quaint New Hampshah traditions to keep your mind off the Cthuhloid Interstellar Horrors that roam the dark sides of the frozen hills, caring not for Earth or Man or his treasured democracy.
  24. Chevy Celebrity Station Wagon with loose muffler that sets off all the car alarms.
  25. Woulda been a lot cheaper to make a fake Cybertruck out of refrigerator boxes and spray paint.
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