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deft

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by deft

  1. The fuck? How you gonna put bland ass shredded pig with aggy jizz jar sauce ahead of anything Texas bbq
  2. “…..and of years of shitass driving”
  3. I picture rumpleminz as Leslie in his leopard thong. Since he’d hang out by the library and ask you to buy him rumpleminz nightly.
  4. Your missing you’re (sick) after rong speling of voila
  5. 29 IPMs?! Those are rookie numbers. Gotta pump those up. I was doing 29 ipms the first week out of checker training in Waco 25 years ago. Real OGs remember the bagging metric “8 in 98”. There was a sticker of an 8ball on every bag rack that year for getting at least 8 items per flimsy ass plastic sack.
  6. It has been ever since the loaded a howitzer on a train car and set it up hwy6.
  7. Maybe the lump’s mass is migrating south for the winter.
  8. Some real get off my lawn vibes here but I agree. The curbside checkers with their big blue carts play completely oblivious to actual shoppers. They park that stupid piece of shit in the middle of the aisle while they’re walking around scanning things.
  9. Italian Tex mex fusion? Now that’s what I call a taco!
  10. deft

    Fuck Big 12 refs

    That official was already moving toward Quinn before he got off the ground or had the chance to “spike” the ball. He was definitely planning on giving him the business regardless. Edit: the, three….whatever it takes
  11. Jesus is the twelfth man. He turned water into offensive yardage. Aggy has a built in out.
  12. Man, they leakin. What could go wrong overserving people who have been tailgating since sun up and only paid for “fighting room only” tickets?
  13. Liquid cheese doesn’t hinge well.
  14. “The wall moved in on me”
  15. The NCAA will allow it in order to hold back aggy the sleeping giant.
  16. If saban reites from Alabama, there’s no amount of money or hubris that would take him to aggy land. He’s not an idiot.
  17. Can I share with you the glory of gold plated Monster cables?
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