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Kennythetiger

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Everything posted by Kennythetiger

  1. “Seventeen million dollars? What time do you want me to leave, and which door?”
  2. I represented a guy that served on a rural fire department. He loved to hit the lights and sirens and speed to the fire, so he’d go out in the country, set fires, and then go back to town and conveniently be near the fire barn when the 911 calls came in. Finally got busted.
  3. You gonna eat the rest of that sausage?
  4. Mine cleans the house before we leave. To the point that it delays us leaving. It’s so that if we both die in a fiery crash at least our house is clean.
  5. Unless it utilizes a breathing apparatus made of kelp.
  6. I thought that was general knowledge.
  7. The dumbest octopus is still smarter than my dog.
  8. *Take your shoes off when you come in the house.
  9. You got this, man. Could I have your watch?
  10. Our president isn’t communicating with leaders of foreign nations through twitter. Shirley.
  11. *hot-ass wife and me
  12. Spoiler that shit, man.
  13. Man I miss President Obama.
  14. Married life is the same across the globe.
  15. Put that on the Steel Shank thread and those heathens will pray to you.
  16. It’s always about oil. Even I know that, and I’m about as dumb as they come.
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