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RDCanecutter

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by RDCanecutter

  1. Seems like that'd be the best reason to depart.
  2. Preparation. If you do even one psychotically violent thing in your youth, you can live the rest of your life being that easy-going friendly guy that nobody fucks with.
  3. I heard they're switching to giant Lego blocks. Let kids do all the work.
  4. Negs are the licorice-flavored jelly beans of endorphin hits. Still got a jelly bean.
  5. We have a small colony here. One lady has a gallery where I show some stuff. If even the tiniest thing sells she'll text me all excited over a few bucks, but I guess that's Real Money back home. Knowing that, I feel obligated to show appreciation for it. I was talking to this other woman, her uncle is a heart surgeon back in Argentina, she says he makes a buck-fifty an hour.
  6. I have kept busy doing art and going to shows, and I'm blessed that people buy what I make. But I do find myself missing weekends when I could just kick back and, I dunno, assemble little sailing ships then meet up with friends at a hobby shop and push them around on a table top pretending to be Master and Commander. Of course, weekends came with Real Jobs during the week. Hell with that.
  7. Only for 4 1/2 years. I've had 13 tedious things to sort out, so instead of doing that, I reverted to 7th grade and ignored them all while finally adding some red to the seats and curtains on the Vampire Van. And not nice painting either. Sorta blobbed it on like a kid, with just a smidge of shading. But Priming? Sealing? For the cost of primer and sealer I could buy a drink, a candy bar, and 3 or 4 comic books. I forgot why I stopped on it. Maybe something about it taking too many steps. Now I crave taking pointless extra steps on it. Prolly give the red one more coat on the raised areas.
  8. The trick is to do 1,000 drawings. Or watercolors, or whatever. 999 to go!
  9. There's something to it.
  10. One day Alina's gonna pop a fake titty and fly around the room like a balloon.
  11. His wikipedia shows no mention of birthplace or early life. He's hiding something.
  12. True, but I thought switchblades went better with the 8-armed leather jacket.
  13. It can hold 8 switchblades.
  14. Lotta fancy words to say you're a pirate.
  15. Did you yell at them in English? You have to yell at them in English.
  16. There's a woman broken down in Ohio who might be appreciative of some truck repairs.
  17. Hawaii? Good, add Hawaii to the list of places we invade and annex. And make sure kids learn history and geography in school.
  18. I could speculate about flavorings, but I'll just stop at the ear wax.
  19. When I want to save money, I just use the credit card. That way it's free.
  20. Most "chocolate" candy bars are made out of ear wax.
  21. I like y'all, but damn if y'all ain't some worrisome over-thinkers. So what if coffee and mangos don't grow well in the USA? The USA used to expand, and it can do it again. I'm talkin LAND-GRABS, son. Let all those Marines training at 29 Palms get some REAL training, secure the port of Manzanillo. Then some Army boys oo-rah their way up to Comala for coffee (and some surprisingly good bread and cheese,) while another division locks down the avocado plantations of Guerrero. If the Mexican Military says boo, supplement their cartel bribes to look the other way. Repeat for any other product we desire, Make the new zones "territories" with lenient immigration policies for people wanting to work in them. Mango?
  22. But but we have a house in Cabo-oo...
  23. My hearin's gone, son, so I missed all of that. Got you down as eligible to vote.
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