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Superhero

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Superhero

  1. Our flight was delayed 2 hours, so I gave the kids some extra screen time on their ipads. Wife: Why did you give them extra screen time, now they won't turn it off. Me: Why don't you just tell them to turn it off? Wife: Well you gave them extra screen time. Me: Do you want me to switch seats so I firmly suggest they turn it off? Wife: No, I'm not switching seats, but why did you give them extra screen time?
  2. Just came back from a week in Tulum. Granted we were by the beach and options were limited, but for the prices they charged, the food was very disappointing.
  3. When my 12 YO girl gets excited and says “yay” in her still chipmunk like voice. She still holds my hand, and dread the day when she tells me to stop.
  4. What’s the cut off between affordable watch and what belongs on this thread? I posted this on the affordable watch thread. It looks great to me, but it’s only a pedestrian $1,000.
  5. 2,1 Unless you’re into the dominatrix thing, then 1,2. Or if you’re into cosplay with Meryl Streep.
  6. It’s it the check engine light? If I recall on my old VW, a solid light means it’s an emissions issue and can still be driven. A flashing check engine light means you’re screwed.
  7. My son’s smelly feet can clear a room. Maybe it’s because he’s really active and feet sweat a LOT, or there’s something else going on. It’s gotten to the point we’re embarrassed to have him go to friends’ houses. We’ve tried disinfectants, arm and hammer “balls” filled with baking soda, washing each foot at lest 30 seconds each day, washing his shoes frequently, and trying out different types of socks… I think we’ve achieved a stalemate with a combo of rotating 3-4 different pairs of shoes, antibacterial soap, new socks and washing his shoes using hydrogen peroxide. Not sure how sustainable after he becomes responsible for it all. But damn, I’d rather smell poop than his shoes.
  8. The hotel in Mexico where I’m currently staying DEFINITELY needs a bidet system, especially since I can’t throw TP in the toilet.
  9. Fuddruckers conversation not going away. It’s been more than 25 years since I ate a 1/3 pound burger smothered in cheese. (Was there a location off of 183?). I think my LDL went up 20 points just from that meal.
  10. That’s fake. However, his star has been smashed at least once, and vandalized repeatedly, such as being accessorized with poop. The best way to prevent damage is to put a barrier over it like this.
  11. At the Disney resort where I’m guessing the guest are at least middle-upper class to afford the rooms. The percentage of people with tattoos at a Sandals resort or Carnival cruise is probably through the roof.
  12. I watched Tarzan in a movie theater just to hear her voice. Listening to her makes me
  13. We must be married to the same woman. Whenever she interrupts, I’ll tell her she interrupted and walk away. We haven’t had a complete conversation in days (other than talking about the tithe). At home I usually have earbuds or earphones and listen to music, audiobooks, stand up comedies or play video games.
  14. First in line at communion don’t come cheap.
  15. White American women. Europeans not so much. One thing l learned while at resorts is that American men and women love their tattoos. I’d say 50% if not more people have tats.
  16. My wife nearly did that crossing the street earlier. Intersection in Mexico with no traffic or street lights. She crossed one direction onto the island and was about to run across before I yelled at her to stop because traffic in the other direction wasn’t slowing down. Her being hit would have been bad enough, but my son was with her as well. Crazy woman.
  17. Daughter dropped my phone just right and now I have splotch of dead pixels by the volume buttons. Her loss because this is supposed to be her phone when I get a new one next year.
  18. NGL. I’d eat that.
  19. Our tax deductions are right. Just miffed that her math is so bad that we’ve probably given about $30-40K more than we agreed upon over the past years.
  20. In Mexico, Tulum to be specific, for a getaway before the kids start their summer camps. From the airport to the hotel, we went through several checkpoints with machine guns toting officers from the federal police, national guard and even marines. Not sure if it’s presidential election jitters, but that made the hour drive a little nervewracking.
  21. I took the boy cabin camping over the weekend the dad/son program. The program is not associated with any religion. The event just happened to be at a Christian campground We got in line for lunch, staying in the shade next to the building. A group of about 20 girls walk past us and tried to get in because their “counselor” told them it was okay cut in front of us. An argument ensued and the counselor went full Karen. In the end, the girls went to the back of the line. Along the way, the counselor asked what happened to ladies first, and we should be ashamed because “this is a Christian campground.” For dinner, we once again lined up against the building, but one of the dads pushes a table in front of the door and called it the “Karen check-in table”. Guffaws all around. Then one of the girls stomps over and yells “Just so you motherfuckers know, we can hear you from back there!” She got booed and we called out to the counselor “hey, this is a Christian campground! What are you teaching the girls?” Karen did not come over.
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