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Brisketexan

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Everything posted by Brisketexan

  1. Brisketexan

    Pizza

    Last Godfathers I ate at was a strip mall Godfathers in Wichita, Kansas 24 years ago (we were suing Koch oil, so that's where the documents were). We took a lunch break and went in. The pizza was glorious, just as I remembered from my childhood. Also, it was kind of a neighborhood joint, and they were trying to entice moms and kids to stop in for lunch. The enticement was a clown working the restaurant crowd. A fucking clown. The creepiest goddamned clown I've ever seen, when we know that ALL clowns are creepy. Shit, my team talked about that fucking clown for YEARS after that trip. Fucking clowns, man.
  2. I mean....a lesson anyone with any sense learned in FIFTH FUCKING GRADE....but our collective business geenyuses can't seem to fucking figure out.
  3. People who gleefully voted for arsonist now bitch about getting burned in the conflagration. Also, they continue to send the arsonist more gasoline.
  4. An image of Hegseth as he begins his address to the gathered leadership: IYKYK.
  5. When low-dollar gov't benefits are given to brown and black people, it's communismsocialism. When massive 6-figure+ gov't benefits are given to white farmers, that's "good for America," and "just giving them what they've earned by being the backbone of America." Coulda sworn you got the memo. America is for rich white people, and the only real Americans are rich white people.
  6. It's actually fascinating that the same dipshits screaming about "we're headed for a population collapse! BREED MORE!" are simultaneously working to make human existence as miserable as possible, and working on ideas that will (1) enrich them in the short term while (2) creating material risk of our collapse/extinction as a species. And the masses gobble it up. We are marching to our own doom with smiles on our faces, and we reflexively attack anyone who dares say "hey....maybe we should pause and think about this."
  7. Yet.....and this is the important part....he would coast to re-election, getting every single one of the "unfavorable opinion" Republican voters, because they heard about a trans volleyball player in Oregon.
  8. This. I have a family member who married into such a family. In fact, soybeans is one of their larger crops. They are fucking absurdly rich. Big beautiful beach house in Florida in addition to the massive farmhouse(s) on their huge chunks of acreage in the upper midwest. Everyone drives new Escalades and such. Money just isn't a concern. Except at some point, maybe it becomes a concern. Voting to derail your own gravy train is certainly a choice.
  9. They're getting a new clock tower?
  10. Pulled a similar move at the Shoney's on Seawall blvd in Galveston. We'd been fishing the flounder run at San Luis Pass since sunrise. Got out of the water, and we were damned hungry. Drove straight to Shoneys. Went in still wearing our waders. Made massive plates of food - including unlimited bacon - while still smelling of seawater and muck. And shit, it was the Shoneys on Seawall, I bet we IMPROVED the classiness of the joint.
  11. It ESPECIALLY includes labor. In Trumpmerica, human beings are opex, not capex. Capex items are things you invest in, build, and maintain. Opex is just an expense to be slashed as much as possible, and then slashed again. We the people are a cost center to be reduced, not a resource to be invested in. Proceed accordingly.
  12. Counterpoint: this approach is evidence of how utterly fucked we are as a society. That's because the ONLY motivating factor for any policy action or item is "but what about ME?" It's the "Leopards Eating People's Faces" problem, nationwide. Government action X hurts the fuck out of person Y. Who cares? In fact, it's worse than "who cares" -- it's "awesome! Suck it, other guy!" It's only when Government action X ends up hurting YOU that you say "wait, Government action X is bad!" The dominant social dynamic in the US is -- for example -- people only worry about massive losses in the availability of healthcare when it hits them. When THEIR hospital closes, when THEIR medicare coverage evaporates, etc. The contra-approach -- one that is functionally dead in this country -- is that people should worry about massive losses in the availability of healthcare that hit their neighbors and fellow countrymen. We should ALL want Lorene and Cletus to have access to basic healthcare, because a healthy commonwealth is a good thing. It's an objectively good thing. It doesn't matter whether it directly benefits me or not. We should want a government that doesn't shit on basic constitutional rights because that is bad for the commonwealth, and destructive of basic governing principles that are social positives as a whole. TLDR; the approach above is just more of "all that matters is the 'me' good, zero consideration for the common good."
  13. It really can't. If there's one thing you can count on aggies for, it's keeping a sufficient stable of heifers suitable for, ummm....."breeding."
  14. The perfection of this era is not that the Super-MAGA approach to education puts a state dead-last. Nope. It's that MAGA looks to what they did in Oklahoma and says "oh don't you worry....we can do even WORSE." We are a full-on kakistocracy. It's shittacular beyond anyone's capacity to imagine even a few short years ago. Objectively speaking, it's one of the most amazing historical transformations ever seen. Rome fell over centuries. We may manage to destroy our nation and empire in a year or less, all to feed the ego of a single psychopath, and to provide the opportunity for a handful of oligarchs to suck all the blood from the corpse, leaving an empty husk but who gives a fuck they got theirs.
  15. "The Commerce Department says" We've already gone full-on "Ministry of Truth." Fantastic. "The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command."
  16. I’m a big fan of the one on TX 332, in Freeport. There’s nothing else anywhere close except entries/exits of chemical plants (Dow is a big one across the street). I just picture some refinery worker stopping at the end of his shift, dirty and sweaty, stopping in and saying “if I pick up some of this strawberry lune and a Thundercock 1200 strap-on, Linda Lou won’t be able to say no to a night of freakiness.”
  17. God I love this. Now apply that standard to…Ken Paxton….almost every single Trump appointee…Tom Homan…etc ad nauseam. Exhibit infinity in the case of “anyone MAGA doesn’t like must be perfect, but anyone within MAGA is bulletproof no matter what.” No objective rules or laws.
  18. "My defense will require de-classifying the entire investigative file I am accused of lying about. Your move, DOTARD."
  19. Discussion of the proper order of usage of a zucchini, lotion, and hot sauce will do that to a relationship.
  20. Yep. Queerer than a football bat (NTTAWWT). Seriously. Just be your true self and suck some dick. You'll be so much happier, AND you won't have to project all your self-loathing onto being hateful to other people.
  21. 1) I've spent the night there, for work. Hell, I've had a high-profile case in Nolan County. 2) The place just ain't the same since Allen's Family Style Meals shut down.
  22. I dunno. But there is one thing I do know with rock-solid certainty: he thinks about sucking dick at least 40 times every day. There is a 100% chance that dude is a self-loathing closeted gay man. Overcompensation by "masculinity" this and "head of the family" that and "gays should be executed" is a guaranteed tell.
  23. Just remember, when MIA went in for his first round of cancer treatment, I doordashed him some supplies.
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