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RDCanecutter

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by RDCanecutter

  1. She said "butt-stuff." Didn't specify whose butt. But yeah, ever since he got old enough to vote, probably lost some of that mojo.
  2. Yep the constant shits do take a bite. There was a stretch back when I was on Keytruda where it took me two weeks to drive to a store 20 miles away. Either I'd be queasy the whole day, or else I'd feel fine, crank up the car, get a mile down the road, then have to flip around and Richard Petty my way home before the shits hit. Now with just the Inlyta, I get one discrete shit blast, usually between 3 and 5 AM. Wake up "knowing," grab a crossword puzzle, sit down, explosions. Finish puzzle, wipe up, go back to sleep like a a dead vampire opium addict. Makes it look like I do 100 crunches a day.
  3. Maybe not compared to some high-end glamor model she won't, no. For rural Missouri, she's Queen of the land.
  4. Mark Creighton is a roofer. He doesn't have to give a fuck. Look down on him for morals or some shit? Sure you go ahead. But when your roof leaks, you'll be begging him to come around.
  5. Good luck getting Jewish people to move to Florida. As if that trend could ever get started.
  6. 2023 was a pretty good year. I planned to make my living only by art, hit shows in the 4 main metros of Alabama, plus at least one show each in the 4 surrounding states. As for execution, I did stay solvent doing art. Wasn't Lamborghini money, but all bills got paid. An order of magnitude better than a few years ago when I was existing via online sales only. Made it to 3 of the 4 metros. Didn't hit a single show out of state. Partially that's because there were enough good shows in Birmingham, that I'd commit to one then find out there'd be a great one the same weekend in Nashville or Atlanta. Barely got things rolling at my print-on-demand sites. Did some commissions, though I'm slow as hell as some of y'all know. Goal for 2024 is to go to the same amount of shows, but bigger, better ones. There's a whole snooty level of shows I'd avoided because they want things like "resumes" and yo like I'm a pirate, but if that is where the gold-laden galleons anchor, lo there shall we raid. Will require investments in much nicer booth space gear, but so be it. I'll need to get after it and produce more large works. Hope to keep doing some big brewery shows, and maybe drop the smaller more arts and craft ones. As for Geographic Conquests, probably more reasonable just to aim at possible day-trips to Atlanta and Nashville, get to know people in those circuits. Selling merch online via print-on-demand seems like the best way to scale up exponentially without the time-consuming costs of Etsy. They sell and ship it and I get my mailbox money without touching it. It's mailbox beer-money so far. Artists dream of selling $1,000+ a month via these site, and I doubt most do. Maybe I should date Taylor Swift.
  7. Stop being cheap, and buy it a walk-in cooler with a mini snow machine. You've got the money. You've got the money, now spend the money.
  8. I agree with BamaATL. When I was cajoled into attending my first (and last) Republican meeting, I asked my mom if we were rolling up on a Klan meeting. And I didn't say it like some suburban teen who calls everything he doesn't like a "Klan meeting." Not long before, my way into work had been blockaded by actual robed Klan members who "okayed" me driving away from the plant after the night shift. Dumb fuckers. To be fair, probably every social affair in late-70s Walker County Alabama had some overlap with the KKK.
  9. As well as Boomer Non-MAGA types.
  10. So you're saying they're PAID ACTORS. Iknewit, knewit, knewit.
  11. I wonder if Mississippi's stats would be better if they included its main city, Memphis. You'd think Alabama and Mississippi would be identical twins, but there is a different vibe. Mississippi got a head start on plantations and castes back when Alabama was still wilderness filled with people who'd cut you for lookin at em. It's still that way RD! Goldurnit, son, I'm a-talkin. I'll cut yew later. OK fine! Anyway, in Mississippi you either inherit your family's lands, or you move to Memphis. Or Mobile. Or my street in the Birmingham metro. Which if you feel like doing it, cmon down. I am talking Hyde Park with actual families, walking distance to groceries, drug store, oncologist and multiple less dramatic medical types, several churches, a dozen restaurants, a library, and maybe 14 bars. And a 30 cent bus to the fucking train station. In the past 20-30 years there has been an explosion in things to do here. An artist can make a living exhibiting at the shows in Birmingham, with maybe some side trips to Huntsville and Montgomery. Mobile is its own world but I've had some good times there. Honestly, it, Pensacola, and maybe New Orleans are some crypto-state that should exist on the coast, and doesn't have a thing to do with anything more than 50 miles from the coast.
  12. I've been told, when preparing for a trip, to go back to the packed bags and Take half as much stuff, and Twice as much money.
  13. Well, they can't drive down the street without posting about it on FB, so why not for something new and original.
  14. As the son of an electrician, I say you should let me rewire your house. Because all that got passed down to me genetically.
  15. I had some guy spamming me that I didn't even buy from. "RD, have you heard what Mike Maloney said today about gold?" Me: No, but I'm gonna take a guess and say he said to buy more of whatever you sell.
  16. Ancient Civilizations gonna Ancient Civ.
  17. I guess they figure if you've just bought an ounce of gold, you are very receptive to future offers. Or they make their money selling your info to all the gold dealers. These are the leads. The new Glen Gary leads. Mitch and Morty paid good money for these leads. Doesn't matter. Got gold.
  18. Yep, depends on the immediate needs of the audience. Advice on how to build a rowboat isn't much use to somebody trying to maintain a yacht, but can change things for somebody who just washed up on an island.
  19. She looks like she went around Costa Rica saying "Hola. Mi lamo es [fakename.]"
  20. Ramsey was useful to me when I was living hand-to-mouth. That whole save-$1000 thing is a good way to break out the cycle of payday-loan, pawn-shop, hey-let's-go-to-the-bar. Still did a lot of the latter, after I had the savings. Tried to convince some broke-ass friends to do the same, but it was like I was speaking Etruscan. This is our last month and then the mortgage is paid. Not because of any system, just because we paid it. We did refi back when rates dropped close to 2% so we saved a handful there. Will not be splurging because there's a lot of maintenance on our house plus two others we are part-owners in. Murdered credit card more than a year ago and use it only for gas or occasional payment, paid off same month. Paying with cash, it disgusts me to eat shitty American restaurant food, so I don't. Secret tip: the grocery stores that sell beer also will sell you food. Gut disappears. Yeah, with the right credit card I could get cash back on this and that, but what would happen IRL is that I'd max it again and be stuck in a financial ankle monitor. We keep our old-ass cars maintained mainly because we like them better than the bloated new shit. When mine inevitably dies I don't know what I'll get, maybe the simplest Scooby Van I can find. Pretty happy in our 1940s Middle Class lifestyle + Wifi + Modern Medicine.
  21. Stopped reading here: "a senior military college."
  22. I think he just jumped out of the jail.
  23. We can use a man like you on the heretic-huntin team.
  24. Over/under on how many of those crimes happened when somebody called him "Debra."
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