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DaggerHorns

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Everything posted by DaggerHorns

  1. “Always Be Hungry” - a short story about Jalen Hurts There the tide were competing for yet another national title. Early in 2018, Jalen Hurts found himself distraught on the bench gobbling on another cock. His teammates looked on while a freshman took the field amidst nearly 3.5 quarters of steady cock gobbling. Many knew how big the stage was while Nick Saban was aware of it being even bigger. “God Dammit Jalen! We’ve given you more cash than Holgerson spends on a summertime Atlantic City hooker and you haven’t scored for shit!” Exclaimed Nick while Tua trotted on the field moments before he won the title in overtime. Jalen was always happy but always hungry....for more cock. Jalen knew that he would eventually move on, and he wouldn’t always be getting aggy love letters but one day he would find a place that fit him well....with more cock. Now its a new era, Jalen has found that warm hard shaft to take down to the balls. Yep, that’s right. His new place is mediocore, in middle America, and it’s got more cock than a Cantonese chicken coup. Jalen has accepted Oklahoma and Lincoln Riley has welcomed him with open zippers. As soon as Jalen arrived in Norman, he knew he had work to do so he immediately let his toothless methhead teammates skull fuck him like a pin cushion in a quilting club. Boomer dick-eating Sooner!
  2. Active vs passive always leads to a longer life expectancy.
  3. I am pretty curious about getting a year with the playbook. Will he be a more traditional OU qb and gobble a bag of dicks? ...or Will he go above and beyond and chow down on a whole barrel of dicks? I disagree with some of you. I think he is a two dimensional guy where he not only takes the whole shaft but he also doesn’t forget the balls.
  4. I like this. Can we go old school Shaggy Figurelli on this needledick?
  5. If you thought Urban should continue to coach, you’re a fuckwad.
  6. The article forgot the part about him being a 9/11 conspiracy theorist... ....and a steaming pile of shit. In all fairness I didn’t read the article because fuck Pete Carroll.
  7. I really wish it would continue but I understand how tedious this must be. Thanks again Pville for doing this. Still one of my favorites.
  8. 8 is the glory hope tailpipe. You can’t see it in the picture but it’s there.
  9. Reply to him with the ESPN link... http://www.espn.com/college-football/playoffPicture SOS higher than those needledicks...
  10. The people that get 3 DWIs or more have a whole other subset of issues in their life. Typically people like this don’t keep up with cell phone bills......much less have the ability to download a fucking app, link up a credit card, etc.
  11. Thank you for using the gif with the jizz. Many of you fail to use this correct version.
  12. I just had French toast that looked kind of like him wearing a helmet with his dreads coming out. He’s staying.
  13. Time to nail some mid-cities DFW cholas!
  14. Good rollercoaster rides have altitude change.
  15. No, there’s really not. We’re all grown adults and I was like, “damn, I’m going to tell my mom and she’s going to lose it because we’ve been trying to drag her down here” Then everyone else was like, “fuck that, I’m not telling my mom at all”
  16. You keep yours from the internet and reality too? Awesome
  17. 5th time on the island. Know it like the back of my hand. Yesterday we had the privelege of watching two dudes run past us immediately after smoking some petty street dealer. Heard gunshots, told the friends to get behind a stucco wall because it was exactly one block away. I crept up because I didn’t want to see gunmen coming into where we were but they casually jogged down Centro with pistols in hand after a leisurely mid-day murder. https://noticaribe.com.mx/2018/12/30/balacera-en-el-centro-de-isla-mujeres-al-menos-un-muerto-en-ataque-dirigido-contra-un-presunto-vendedor-de-artesanias/
  18. Jesus titty fucking Christ. the shit.....you’re smoking.....please give me some.
  19. In Mexico we have DirectTV, U-verse and a thousand other apps. How do I watch games while fighting off Monetzuma’s revenge? Any streaming ideas?
  20. RIP. A true American. Complete fucking bad ass. Respect.
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