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mr. sunshine

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Everything posted by mr. sunshine

  1. True story. When we were kids playing football we'd down every kick at the 1 yard line so we could run the touchdown play It was good for 99 yards, 49 yards, etc. depending on the size of the field or lawn. I will diagram this play on a whiskey soaked coaster if anybody knows how to get it to Sark
  2. It would probably make her eyes bug out. Oops too late
  3. Highland Homes. Because meth must be a helluva drug
  4. Among other things this reminds of back when the scissor sisters who ran women's athletics just knew that men shouldn't get the opportunity to coach women
  5. Bitch needs a cotton candy IV. Stat!
  6. Ariel from Austin tells us that as a black woman, as opposed to other addicts I guess, her recovery has to be "loud." Like you talking during a movie, Ariel?
  7. Another vote for Silver Linings Playbook. Whenever I hear "What Is and What Should Never Be" I think of Bradley Cooper and DeNiro going at it
  8. Saying someone hit "the ground" when you're indoors. If you're inside it's called a floor unless you live in the Little House on the Prairie. If you're talking about basketball it's called a court, not the fucking ground, ESPN chuckleheads
  9. Years ago when the legislature classified theft of precious metals as a felony as opposed to theft of regular old metals, which was usually a misdemeanor, deputies and city cops became amateur metalurgists. If they could file a case as the former rather than the latter they almost always did. I noticed when they made assault by choking a felony as opposed to assault, which is usually a misdemeanor, a shitload of cases were filed as assault by choking. Even in some cases I either prosecuted or defended in which there was no evidence of it and the alleged victim specifically told the officer(s) that she/he wasn't choked. Like y'all I don't know the merits of this particular charge. Just saying after 34 years of doing this I've noticed some trends
  10. This is for Allah and it's going way out there suckah
  11. They're advertising a new reality series featuring Mr. Anger Management, Mrs. Attention Whore and their seven teat clutching children. Just openly wondering what kind of self loathing sub human would be interested in this
  12. Sure but that would probably take several days. Maybe a week or more. On the other hand a housecat would start eating its owner before the body was cold
  13. They're replaying it on HBO Comedy. Susie Greene is actually kinda attractive and fuckable in the first few seasons. Trying to decide at which point she ditched all that and started dressing like a rodeo clown
  14. That shirt was surely a pussy magnet
  15. On a related note I think NBA games including the finals were tape delayed until '81 or '82
  16. Never saw a single Harry Potter movie nor read the books
  17. I still smoked the last cruise I went on. Rolled a dozen fatties and put them in my Metamucil. Nobody was the wiser WARNING: Your results may differ
  18. My time in Austin coincided with the "Kaiser Bob" era. I was a Wrangler so I had to attend the games. Doubt there's ever been a greater combination of shitty and boring basketball unless we're witnessing it now
  19. This being surly just pretend you're George Costanza and it will come to you
  20. She's a multi tasker. I'm conjuring up a third task for her
  21. Among other things I like that it stars both a Linda and a Lynda. That's speciale alright
  22. Richie Incognito sounds like the name of the ultimate Sopranos character. Besides AJ of course
  23. Hey Jackie Aprile, Jr. earned a few hours there according to no less an authority than Jackie Aprile, Jr.
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