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Oddest thing a woman ever said to you during sexy time

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I dated a friend of mine wife's sister a few years ago. One time while she was blowing me she stops, takes a selfie with my dick next to her face and said "My mom doesn't believe it's almost bigger than my face!" sends it to her and goes back to work like it was nothing. 

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19 minutes ago, butthurt said:

I dated a friend of mine wife's sister a few years ago. One time while she was blowing me she stops, takes a selfie with my dick next to her face and said "My mom doesn't believe it's almost bigger than my face!" sends it to her and goes back to work like it was nothing. 

So when did you bang the mom?  

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3 hours ago, butthurt said:

my dick next to her face and said "My mom doesn't believe it's almost bigger than my face!" 

beetlejuice-beetlejuice-the-movie-108150
so she looked like this?  gross, dude. 

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12 hours ago, butthurt said:

I dated a friend of mine wife's sister a few years ago. One time while she was blowing me she stops, takes a selfie with my dick next to her face and said "My mom doesn't believe it's almost bigger than my face!" sends it to her and goes back to work like it was nothing. 

giphy.gif

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I dated a friend of mine wife's sister a few years ago. One time while she was blowing me she stops, takes a selfie with my dick next to her face and said "My mom doesn't believe it's almost bigger than my face!" sends it to her and goes back to work like it was nothing. 
None of us here are chicks. We arent banging you. These made up stories wont work unless Nowthis is back on the forum.

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God damn.. I've got a few.

"You seemed to enjoy pissing on me. If we do it in the bath tub with the shower on will you shit on me?" 

I want you to break into my house and try to fuck me while I resist. 

Can I suck your dick while you watch the game? I promise not to block the TV.

Did we have anal sex? (We hadn't)

You should let me take you to the Kohler resort, I'll bring my daughter. (Her daughter was 15, there was some real fucked up shit implied in further conversation) "You're man enough for both of us"

Hit me, no in the face, with your fist. Hard.

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7 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

God damn.. I've got a few.

"You seemed to enjoy pissing on me. If we do it in the bath tub with the shower on will you shit on me?" 

I want you to break into my house and try to fuck me while I resist. 

Can I suck your dick while you watch the game? I promise not to block the TV.

Did we have anal sex? (We hadn't)

You should let me take you to the Kohler resort, I'll bring my daughter. (Her daughter was 15, there was some real fucked up shit implied in further conversation) "You're man enough for both of us"

Hit me, no in the face, with your fist. Hard.

The title of this thread is "oddest thing", not "best thing".

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7 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

You should let me take you to the Kohler resort, I'll bring my daughter. (Her daughter was 15, there was some real fucked up shit implied in further conversation) "You're man enough for both of us"

you-had-my-curiosity-now-you-have-my-att

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"Can I fuck you in the ass with my dildo"

Can I stick my dildo in your ass? I think you will like it"

"Can we pretend we are brother/sister"

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God damn.. I've got a few.
"You seemed to enjoy pissing on me. If we do it in the bath tub with the shower on will you shit on me?" 
I want you to break into my house and try to fuck me while I resist. 
Can I suck your dick while you watch the game? I promise not to block the TV.
Did we have anal sex? (We hadn't)
You should let me take you to the Kohler resort, I'll bring my daughter. (Her daughter was 15, there was some real fucked up shit implied in further conversation) "You're man enough for both of us"
Hit me, no in the face, with your fist. Hard.

I thought I had done some messed up shit, but damn

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13 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

 

You should let me take you to the Kohler resort, I'll bring my daughter. (Her daughter was 15, there was some real fucked up shit implied in further conversation) "You're man enough for both of us"

 

No matter what is posted after that, it wont be able to be "one up'd".

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On 3/11/2020 at 11:38 AM, butthurt said:

I dated a friend of mine wife's sister a few years ago. One time while she was blowing me she stops, takes a selfie with my dick next to her face and said "My mom doesn't believe it's almost bigger than my face!" sends it to her and goes back to work like it was nothing. 

Will Ferrell Reaction GIF

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10 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

 

"Can we pretend we are brother/sister"

I had a chick who wanted to do this role-play a few times. Each time, it would end up with, “Never mind. Forget I said it. Let’s just fuck.”  I never inquired further. Maybe I wasn’t doing it right. 
 

Also had a very good friend and fuck buddy who had serious daddy issues.  Many stories could be told.  Used to refer to me as “yummy daddy dick”.  I kinda miss her.....

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We fucked all morning, took a shower and laid back down on the bed...she asks "this is better than Caroline, isn't it?" I was 19, she was 39

Caroline was her daughter who I'd dated the year before

And yes she was better than Caroline...kept fucking mom for nearly 2 years after that

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