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NeverMarryAStripper

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by NeverMarryAStripper

  1. I bet a certain orange-haired, fat former president would sponsor CR. You should contact him. No CR
  2. At a minimum his car should be forfeited under asset forfeiture. As long as that bullshit policy is here let’s use it for something appropriate
  3. Go sit in your lazy boy recliner with your feet up until Tuesday.
  4. I really like this idea, unfortunately according to their web site it is not available yet. It is still undergoing trails for approval. They do have a biodegradable ash urn designed to be buried with a tree planted on top. In Texas, the biodegradable ash urn would be allowed to be buried on private property with no approval needed. The tree pod, in Texas, would require the registering of a private burial site. I’m in the process of updating my will and instructions and this is pretty much what I have decided. 1) No religious service at all. In fact no memorial service at all. I have no desire to have people, especially those that I despised, to gather around and tell lies about me. 2) You can have an obituary if you want. I would prefer none, but if you insist put all of the lies there. They will fit right in with the rest of the lies in the news. 3) Cremate me 4) Put my ashes in one of those biodegradable tree urns and plant me in the pasture at the ranch where every dog that I have ever had is buried. 5) Plant a tree over me. I’m still trying to decide what kind of tree. I know I’ll need to specify that or I’ll end up under some kind of dipshit tree. Right now I’m thinking a Texas Mountain Laurel, but I’m not sure it would do well there. On the other hand, being buried under a tree that dies may be appropriate.
  5. I hope you weren’t planning on ever getting laid again
  6. Let’s say somehow you could look into the future just enough to see the winning lottery numbers and run down to the shop and rob to buy a ticket before the drawing. You also see that someone else has the winning ticket. So being clever, you decide to buy 10 tickets with the winning number so you get 10/11 rather than 1/2. Let’s also say that this was the $1.5 billion jackpot. How long, and how much in legal fees, do you think it would take before you could actually get payment?
  7. If I had a left nut, I would have given it to be 57 when my daughter graduated high school.
  8. That reminds me. My ex started collecting those things from the very beginning and she has a trunk full of them that she brought over here to store. I need to go through it to see if she has one of the few that are actually worth something now.
  9. I was AllState with Auto, Home and Umbrella as well. I had been with them for 12 years. My auto doubled when it renewed in February. I went with Amica and got about a 30% decrease from the pre doubling premium. I called AllState and told them I wasn’t renewing and they couldn’t have cared less. In March I got a notice that I failed to pay my premium and they were going to cancel my policy. I had to call them and tell them what dumb shits they were. Their homeowner’s policy was higher than Amica though.
  10. Maybe the first guy did put Freon in it, but it leaked out in a week. The second guy was lying when he said there was no leak because there has to be a leak unless someone is stealing his Freon. The second guy probably just didn’t want to find the leak because he probably had 50 people screaming at him to come fix their AC and he knew if he just added Freon it would get him off his back and on to the next screaming customer. Let us know in a week if someone else has to add Freon.
  11. Johnson sounds big and reliable. Mr winkie on the other hand……..
  12. I tend to think everyone involved in this story had ulterior motives and is probably acting out of greed now. I still liked the movie and would marry Sandra.
  13. I'm no AC repairman, but there has to be a reason that your unit was low on freon. It doesn't just get used up.
  14. I don't blame her for leaving town when you're throwing hammers
  15. Cash transactions will be one of the first things to go when people for freedom establish a authoritarian government
  16. It should be cut down so they can expand the store and really start making money
  17. I think the robot just wasn't very proficient in English. He wasn't saying Danger Will Robinson, he was saying Danger from Will Robinson.
  18. I started watching this hoping to not like it because it's Taylor Sheridan, but now I'm hooked.
  19. It appears to be a Japanese video summary of the 2014 Oregon-Utah game where Kaelin Clay spiked the ball at the one-yard line and it was returned for an Oregon touchdown. At any rate, it sets the bar for football game summaries that will probably never be broken.
  20. Maybe being an asshole finally worked. Most successful people I know are assholes, but then again, so are the losers and mediocre people.
  21. I saying it now, there will be no UT players on the 1st team all-conference since those are voted on by the head coaches. Also, since you can't vote for your own players, at most a UT player will get one vote.
  22. This is a very odd criticism to me. I've seen the movie several times, and it just seemed to me to be a feel-good movie about someone doing something good for someone else with no ulterior motives. On Surly, when something is criticized as "Christian", it's usually because it's preachy in a religious way that reeks of self-superiority. This movie just seemed to reach into the heart of Christianity, as Christ advocated for as the second of the two great commandments in Mathew 22 39: "And the second is like unto it. Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself". Unfortunately, this commandment seems to be ignored by many who, very vocally, call themselves Christians. I don't recall religion even really being a part of it. So it appears that you are just a grumpy old man who doesn't like feel-good movies and prefers movies where everyone gets fucked over. Of course, all of this ignores what actually happened in real life. The real-life story is something that I'm not privy to and hold no opinion on at this time. In addition, Sandra is one of my great screen loves, and I'm offering myself as her rebound future ex.
  23. Because people are basically just animals these days. Sorry for the insult to animals. People just suck.
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