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Sandman

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Everything posted by Sandman

  1. 25 years ago, the fence at my former house was shit and needed to be replaced. I went to the neighbor and said I was getting quotes and asked him if he wanted to split it. He hemmed and hawed and said something about how he was planning on replacing it himself but just hadn't had the time right now. My dogs were getting into his yard, so I said this shit can't wait, are you in or out? He got sheepish and said he was out. I had it replaced and ate the whole cost. Never cared for the guy after that. Just a few years ago at my current house, my neighbor came over and said he was going to replace the fence himself and wanted to know if we wanted to chip in on the cost of materials. I cut him a check for half of it right then and there. Had a new fence a few days later. When the fence on the other side needed replaced, me and that neighbor got bids and split everything. No bullshitting around. Always ask them if they want to chip in. Worse case scenario, you get no money but find out your neighbor is kind of a dick and you can ignore him from then on.
  2. My friend has three kids and the youngest is now a senior. Me and our other friend, our kids are all out of school. I thought it would be easier for us to all get together once all the kids were driving and working or had graduated, but my one friend with the 3 kids just can't seem to make it happen. He denies it but we all know his wife keeps him on a short leash, and he doesn't seem willing or able to loosen it up. It's a real shame. A couple of weeks ago, I texted him a meme or something funny, he replied in 5 mins. I then follow up with "hey what are you doing this weekend?" and got nothing.
  3. The last 4-5 years on opening weekend, I always say "Football starts tonight and I'm gonna watch it, regardless of who's playing". I never make it more than a drive or two before I get disinterested and turn it off. Getting old is a bitch.
  4. What puts me in a football mood is when I turn on the TV at 2:30 and the ball is kicked off at 2:35.
  5. College Gameday and NFL Countdown were fine when they were an hour long, and they talked about...football. Not some player's mom that was sick or dad was in prison. Just matchups and who had a better chance to win. Fuck this 3-4 hour bullshit. I haven't seen a pregame show in 10+ years and I don't miss them.
  6. I remember playing at SMU, I think it was the 7 TD game for Rashaun Woods. A student wrote an Op-Ed for the school paper, saying it was time for Pistol Pete to put his guns away. What a joke.
  7. Males over the age of 15 should either keep their fingernails cut or wear gloves 24/7, so nobody has to look at their nasty hands. If your son has fucking gross nails that are an inch or two long, you have failed as a parent.
  8. Over/under on the number of rapes that would take place on this ship? 100? It would make Woodstock 2 look like a live episode of Mister Rogers.
  9. I heard the only reason Gundy hasn't announced Bowman as the starter was to prevent guys from hitting the portal before the season starts.
  10. Finally? We just beat them in 2021. I know it doesn't happen often but it's not like it's been 20 years.
  11. That's nothing. We had a tiger-quake-nado in Oklahoma 7-8 years ago. A tornado blew up an exotic zoo and the tigers escaped. Then we had an earthquake on top of that. You guys always talk about how Oklahoma sucks but you really have no idea.
  12. Ah, my old high school rival. There's a reason it's known as "Del Shitty". What a dump.
  13. Surprised to see Oklahoma State ahead of LSU, Oregon, Washington.
  14. Our NBA arena went cashless during covid and stayed that way. Something about handling dirty cash. Not sure cards are that much cleaner but whatever. Personally, I think they got tired of employees skimming the till.
  15. My ex wife better not fucking show up on my deathbed. She needs to die first.
  16. My wife called me to tell me she received a text from our nextdoor neighbor. His son passed away. He was 20/21 so I don't think it takes a rocket scientist to figure out what happened. I know he was going through some things, his dad and I would talk about our grown kids and wonder WTF they were doing. Never anything mean, just dads trying to wrap our heads around the doings of young people. He was a polite kid, always said hi if he saw us out and about. Never looked away and pretended he didn't see us. It's a real shame.
  17. The other day, we booked a trip using my wife's credit card, to get the points. After the charge hit, I told my wife to transfer money to the checking account and pay the bill. She did so the next day. Last night, she was looking at the bank account and exclaimed "$3000 was taken from our bank account!". I said well, you transferred the money over, right? She said "Yeah but this was taken directly from our account, after I did the transfer!!". I looked at her and said you paid the bill...right? "Oh yeah"
  18. Drive to norman, AND spend 8-9 hours to do so? I think I'd rather blow some guy in an alley.
  19. Pulling out the first 1 or 2 tissues from a new box, they just get shredded because they're packed in too tight.
  20. That's why I'm kinda glad I have a hybrid schedule, every other week in the office. It's good to see coworkers and get some of that esprit de corps.
  21. Your teammate sounds dumb for calling his insurance company to rat himself out. Does he go by the police station to admit to speeding and cut them a check? Also, he could bring a lunch to work and drink water, if he's that hard up.
  22. Well, I shit more when I'm working from home. Should they pay me more for my increased TP and water usage? I also use my own electricity to power my work PC, and use my personal cell phone. Should I get reimbursed for that?
  23. I started rotating in May 2020. My annual and sick leave started stacking up like a mofo, as I didn't need to take off as much. I now take a nice vacation every 12-18 months. I had so much extra money that my wife and I can eat out more or buy new clothes more often. I'm a sneakerhead/shoe collector and I've bought more shit than I care to admit. I bought a brand new car in April last year, still haven't hit 10K miles yet. My fuel costs are way down too. So yeah, those big corps are gonna get their money if they just shut up.
  24. Sandman

    Getting old sucks

    Walked into the living room this morning, just a normal day. But as I was walking, I guess I pulled something in my back/ribs. Had to double over just to catch my breath. Better now but I'm sore and I'm sure that will last for several days.
  25. Now that this shit has settled, I'm glad I don't have to hear the term "four corners" for a while. Don't know why but that phrase grinds my gears like a mofo.
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