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Getting Laid 2020

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On 2/24/2020 at 7:49 AM, brown water said:

Should we split this thread into a single and married edition?

I propose a third category called purgatory. Anyways I'm off to fap in the shower. BnB I'm staying in has one of those hand held shower wands if you know what I'm saying. 

55d 9h 52m 22s  into 2020 and absolutely no sign of getting laid. Huzzah! 

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6 hours ago, Marfa Low Crown said:

I propose a third category called purgatory. Anyways I'm off to fap in the shower. BnB I'm staying in has one of those hand held shower wands if you know what I'm saying. 

55d 9h 52m 22s  into 2020 and absolutely no sign of getting laid. Huzzah! 

NowThis?  That you?

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spacer.png

#rules 

Life balance. I’m shart thread royalty  & one of the biggest losers on this one. Fuck it, most exciting thing to happen in months anyways.

Edited by Marfa Low Crown

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Wife proposed we dump the kids off at one of the grandparents at the end of this month; shack up at a hotel, take booze and only order room service for that weekend.  Said we aren't hitting our quotas.

I'm down.

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52 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

What are you going to do for the 47 hours and 59 minutes that you’re not having sex? Talk to her?

Cross stitch.

 

 

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2 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

What are you going to do for the 47 hours and 59 minutes that you’re not having sex? Talk to her?

Post on this thread.

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Posted (edited)

80-B5-E855-4-FFD-4316-8-DA7-1-E0197-CF1-
A22-EDF8-D-F4-BD-494-D-951-C-0-B417174-A

 

Still going strong at at least once every time we see each other which is basically daily now. Taking a trip to one of those Getaway cabins this weekend before she goes to Brazil for 2 weeks. LSD will be involved. Pray for me gents.

Edited by Hank_Hill

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55 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

80-B5-E855-4-FFD-4316-8-DA7-1-E0197-CF1-
A22-EDF8-D-F4-BD-494-D-951-C-0-B417174-A

 

Still going strong at at least once every time we see each other which is basically daily now. Taking a trip to one of those Getaway cabins this weekend before she goes to Brazil for 2 weeks. LSD will be involved. Pray for me gents.

Licking. Sucking. Dicking.  Nice.  You should take some drugs, too.

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Nothing wrong with that ass 

lady friend driving in early tomorrow to nail me before a work lunch 

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Late check in for Tuesday night session, with another planned for this Saturday. It’s barely March and I’ve already gotten laid this year more than I did in 2019.

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45 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Life sure changed for you in the last couple years, huh?  I am happy for you. 

Thanks, man.  Indeed quite a change, but I've arrived at the place where I now understand it's all for the better, and not just because of the regular sex.

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It’s a bit soon to get into a heavy relationship though, isn’t it? Or is she just wanting to be your FB?

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1 hour ago, Armybrat said:

It’s a bit soon to get into a heavy relationship though, isn’t it? Or is she just wanting to be your FB?

I think it's something in between.  I enjoy spending time with her, but am taking it slow and steady. 

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Have y’all had the exclusive talk or does she know you could be banging others.

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31 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

0168120-A-CB11-42-CB-8860-AF382-BD71-F10
 

8 times in the last 24 hours. Had worse weekends.

Tremendous job, and congratulations! 

(assuming that's not a dead body, that is) 

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0168120-A-CB11-42-CB-8860-AF382-BD71-F10.jpg
 
8 times in the last 24 hours. Had worse weekends.


Bravo! I bet a bear got him a nice show. Love the scenery, and the trees too.

PS, I haven’t been able to pop off that many times since I was 20.

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45 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

We should move this into a different forum

Just walk up to that window.

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Alright so..... 

I've used this thread as a platform to complain about NOT getting laid but with the collection of glorious f'n bastards on teh surl maybe I can get steered in the direction TO getting laid.

I'm 45. I don't know where the time went either. I realized today that I have not actually dated in about 13-14 years. I went from one long term relationship to the next with women whom I met through mutual friends. When I was in my early 30's my range was absolutely golden ; I could date down into the 20's and as high as the mid 40's. Nowadays I'm putting the cap on the early 50's and probably low 30's so I've probably lost some ground. 

Back then I was working farm and ranch and being isolated, had to go the online route.  I got laid off of eHarmony, Match, and Plenty of Fish with just a little effort and met some great gals. Also, I set a good policy that when living in a small town I didn't hunt on the reservation unless I meet a unicorn (which never happened). If / when shit goes south, you can't get away from an ex in a small town. Recent events have me moving to a very small town once again and I intend to keep that same policy although I realize that my small pool just got even smaller. 

I'm thinking I'll probably stick with the mate selection criteria I used back in my 30's assuming it'll still work.. mainly stuff like... does she have low self esteem, daddy issues, or dating for the first time in years after a divorce... and does she have a nice big butt. That tended to work out pretty well the last time.  Meanwhile what didn't work the last time was being completely honest. I knew these gals were looking for a life mate but with my crippling self esteem issues, substance abuse, traumatic stress disorders, and the fact that I've never had a relationship last longer than 4 years... it means I knew they were never going to get what they wanted. Meanwhile I was just hoping they were a complete tramp in the sack until they finally figured out I was a waste of time, got angry with me, and pulled the plug. Which is how they just about all ended. The honest truth is I don't want to do that to a woman again and dash her hopes, so I'd rather just be able to come out and let them know that while I'm far from husband material and generally a fucking train wreck, I'm funny and fun to be with as we're flying off the mountain. I don't want to have to mislead or omit to get laid.. it's not fair to the woman. 

Alright, so.... what am I looking at here? Tinder? That wasn't around the last time and I understand that's geared towards hooking up? Is that for the younger crowd? Plenty of fish was pleasantly trashy but also annoying. Do people still use that?  I presume Match is still full of women with 2 kids or a ticking clock looking for a husband? As damaged goods with a few working parts left, where does one go? 



 

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On 3/5/2020 at 9:55 PM, tx 3 putt said:

Nothing wrong with that ass 

lady friend driving in early tomorrow to nail me before a work lunch 

You Jesus or something?

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On 3/8/2020 at 6:11 PM, Hank_Hill said:

0168120-A-CB11-42-CB-8860-AF382-BD71-F10
 

8 times in the last 24 hours. Had worse weekends.

Where's Bert?

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22 hours ago, Marfa Low Crown said:

Not having sex for several months hasn’t turned me gay. Yet. 

Plenty of Sheep 

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All right I’m going hoggin on Tinder,

not a whole Lotta options where I am but... a couple of DD or better Eaters on the radar,  fuck yeah I’m totally down.

I don’t need Clemson for the first game of the season... perfectly content to schedule some DII & just pick up some W’s. 
 

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17 minutes ago, Marfa Low Crown said:

All right I’m going hoggin on Tinder,

not a whole Lotta options where I am but... a couple of DD or better Eaters on the radar,  fuck yeah I’m totally down.

I don’t need Clemson for the first game of the season... perfectly content to schedule some DII & just pick up some W’s. 
 

Is this English?

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