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Brisketexan

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Everything posted by Brisketexan

  1. Our Pustule In Chief literally said that he would do so: Because he has the IQ of a hollowed-out rotted pumpkin.
  2. Guilty. As. Charged. No shame, no ragrets.
  3. "I agree with what Elon and Trump are doing, it's the way they are doing it." Yeah, cultist. So, that sentence means that you DON'T agree with what they are doing. That's how that works. Like if a dude violently rapes his wife, you don't get to say "I agree with what he's doing (having sex with his wife), I just don't like the way he's doing it (via violent rape)." No, dude. See, the ACT here is not "having sex." The act is "violent rape." The act being committed by Elon and Trump is not "systematically reducing actual fraud, waste, and abuse." The act is "taking a flamethrower to a staggering number of good and important functions the government performs." I hate how stupid these people are, and I wish there was some way to use the same propaganda outlets to convince them that the ultimate way to own tha libz, and thus their patriotic duty, is to drink a fucking quart of hemlock.
  4. That’s not the Genesis he meant. There must be some misunderstanding.
  5. "They won't explain why." Dudes. Here's the cheat code, and it applies to literally everything happening right now: is it a fucking dickish, totally assholish thing to do? Yes? Well then, THAT'S WHY THEY'RE DOING IT. The operating principle of our government is "be randomly mean assholes.
  6. "Atomheart, STOP! Why won't Hayley Atwell and Elizabeth Hurley just make a deal???!!!"
  7. "Brisketexan stopping at merely marrying and occasionally pleasing his wife before he seduced Sela Ward, Hayley Atwell, Elizabeth Hurley, and Susanna Hoffs is a pretty big concession by Brisketexan."
  8. Is he? Our president is a fucking low-IQ toddler. The bar is so, so, so low.
  9. I have an old friend who works in the Pentagon. She literally has to check her phone in on the way in every morning, leave it in a box, and retrieve it on her way out. And while her clearance is high....the SecDef's is way higher. If you sat a bunch of knowledgeable folks down on January 19th, and told them "create for me the most clownshow administration imaginable"....they still would have fallen far short of the reality we now live in.
  10. I mean, respek to you both...but I realize now I was misreading Mac's ranking. You both have Madeline too low. You can rank any of the young gals as 1, but Madeline has to get your 2 spot. Because Madeline.
  11. And the thing is....I really don't know if I go anywhere at all down that "savior/salvation" road at all. In many...most?....all?...respects, I'm more of a universalist. And the "Atman in search of the Brahman" thing is really spot on for that. I am an essential part of the universe -- it is not complete without me. I will always be part of the universe, for good or bad. That cannot be changed. Which I actually think is beautiful, and creates its own sense of obligation. The story of the universe cannot be told without telling the story of me. And as my chapter is written into that book, shouldn't it be a chapter for the good? Wouldn't that be best? "Let me tell you the story of the story of the time this stardust spent as Brisketexan. It was good. This universe of ours was made a better place because of the time that stardust spent as Brisketexan." Or, maybe it will be "yeah....this stardust spent some time as Brisketexan. Trust me, you really don't want to know about it. Nothing good came of it, plus there was a time where he made Allsup's burritos fall into short supply. So, let's talk about that stardust's next iteration -- worm food. Man, those were some good worms." And to tie it back to the divine (and that Atman-Brahman), that means that the divinity of this universe is also in me. What an amazing, profound, and beautiful thing. The spark of creation, of life, is lit and burns within me. What a fool I would be to squander it as it exists in the individual iteration we call Brisketexan.
  12. Bozo said this once (and I attribute it to him, because it's damned good): when asked if he's a Christian, the right answer is "no, but I'm trying to be." To call on a point of reference that most of us will recognize, I think often of the last bit of Saving Private Ryan, as the old Ryan, remembering the sacrifice and loss that were necessary to get him to his old age, asks his family "tell me I've lived a good life." The way I see it, there are two types of people in this world: 1) those who ask that sort of question at the end of their life (and are never satisfied with the answer, because they know there's always something more/better that they could have done) and 2) those who really don't even give a fuck about that question. I have told my wife more than once that one of the things that keeps me up at night is the knowledge that I've fallen short: I haven't done enough to help, I haven't been as kind as I could be, I haven't done as much good as I could have. The answer of "you've done plenty" is unsatisfying, as you're acutely aware that you could have done more . . . and if you could have done more, then that means you haven't done enough. Intellectually, I know that's not true. Spiritually....well, spiritually speaking, I'm not very intellectual. I'm a simple man. If I gave someone my shoes, my question after the fact is "wait, why the fuck didn't I give him my socks, too?" And by the way, I am NOT posting this to make a point that I'm some good person - quite the opposite. I fall short more epically and profoundly than I could ever be comfortable with. I'm not shit. And even though I say "but I'm trying to be" with respect to being a Christian . . . am I really? Am I really trying? Or am I another selfish lazy piece of shit? Signs point to the POS option.
  13. Needed to be in bold and large type. JC gave very simple laws. But as an attorney, reading what "Christianity" has done to that reminds me of what happens to good laws when well-funded special interest lobbies get ahold of them. The law ends up reading like this: A) It's against the law to poison people. B) Exceptions to the prohibition in section A) are as follows: 1) does not apply to poisoners named "Steve" 2) does not apply if you really don't like the person you're poisoning ..... 947) does not apply to Bob Smith, of 123 Pecan Street, because he stroked me a big fat campaign check The rule is "love." The exceptions to, and/or counter-textual definitions of what it means to "love," have swallowed the rule to the point that it's damned near the LAST thing "Christians" will do.
  14. Low-rent/blue-collar/working class bbqs of most varieties are pretty damned good. Although a lotta you midwestern types need to get on board the seasoning/spice train.
  15. I disagree with this as a blanket statement, but for one reason only: the advent of the "Taqueria Morelia #2" or somesuch in most every small town. In what used to a be a DQ, Pizza Hut, or some other small building, every small town now has some sort of legit taqueria, serving real mexican food with real ingredients. It's often the only decent place in town, demonstrated by the fact that even all the white farmers meet there for lunch. Otherwise, you're spot-on.
  16. I said I wasn't a genius. I didn't say that the world isn't full of an oversupply of cowardly fools.
  17. Or maybe the markets believe what most folks around here believe: it doesn't matter who's telling the whole truth right now, the most likely outcome is that Trump will cave and call it a victory.
  18. Brisketexan, still looking around for any reason he should give a fuck about any of this....
  19. 10,000X this. I can't tell you how many times I've told a client up against a "big bully" opposing party that their only task at this point was to just stand their ground. Let the gorilla charge, beat his chest, and kick up dust. We'll spend some time and money dealing with the mess, but all you have to do is stand your ground and not back down. Because once the other side has run through the full repertoire of chest beating and such....they don't have anything substantive left. And they rarely have a Plan B. And that's when we go on the offensive. And that's when the other side caves. I'm not exactly a genius advisor in this respect. Anyone who has done the slightest bit of homework on the subject matter knows this play.
  20. Man. It seems like you've gotten inside information on the new slogan we'll be putting on all our coinage. "IN GOD WE TRUST" isn't just passe, it's off-brand. Be on the lookout for new quarters emblazoned with "THIS IS JUST FUCKING STUPID."
  21. I'm just glad that the US has leadership so bigly strong now that nobody in the world dares start a war, lest it upset the US, the most respected country in the world with the most respect its ever had. Right? Jesus, just imagining how badly we'll botch the relatively limited role we'll have in this matter is going to be super fun.
  22. Poorly kept secret: Anderson is a bit of a shitshow.
  23. FUCK YOU. I don't eat that PF Changs shit. I go to real-deal chinese joints. The kinda places you can get chicken feet and stewed tripe and legit dumplings. In other words, I am 1,000 times more qualified -- and more likely to be successful -- in any trade negotiations with China than any fucking member of this current clownshow admin would be. We just keep repeatedly shooting ourselves in the dick, slapping another magazine in the gun when we burn through the previous mag, and begging China out loud "won't you stop me from doing this?" China's response...
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