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Dumbass Shit We See On Facebook


Vic Mackey

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Re coffee misadventures, I know this old hippie / shaman type whose done just about every drug on earth...The guy is an extreme genius and also an extreme casualty of psychedelic drugs -- he lives in a shed behind an antique store.

Anyway, here is his disastrous coffee enema story. It starts with him talking about how he fasts a day or two each week...He was at some yoga class:

One lady affirmed to her friend that the benefits of her fasting had been wonderfully enhanced by taking a ‘coffee enema’ at the conclusion of the fast....
I listened with curious interest...But, ignorantly, asked no questions and did no research ( this was before we all had computers in our pockets )...
I happened to be finishing a fast that very next day....and resolved to give coffee a try...
The punch-line here, and the startling/hilarious/pathetic denouement of my youthful ignorance lies in the fact that ALL the benefits of the coffee can be had with merely 1 or 2 TABLESPOONS of coffee mixed-in with A HALF-GALLON of water....
Not having ‘bothered’ to learn/inform myself of that simple fact.....the next morning, I ran 9 CUPS of percolated Seaport up my butt!...( I DID allow it to cool-down to body-temperature before ‘using’ it )....
Every caffeine-addict knows that Seaport is tantamount to legal-Speed...and that butt-hose was the WORST form of ‘shooting-up’....
It was easily the MOST disgusting physiological experience that I have ever had....It was full-throttle rip-shit for about 12 hours, and I could feel the effects of it for an entire week....

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