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Posted (edited)

Sitting in the kitchen...where we spend most of our time, at our comfortable island with nice barstools and a TV. Laptops out, etc.   GF says she's going to shower and then she'll see me in bed.  Within a few moments, it's a fucking 5 alarm fire in my colon.  This is a 4 bedroom bathroom main house, with one more in the guest house, and I destroy my undies before I can make it to the nearest.  Straight to the garbage, and I'm such a mess that it's right into that shower for a hosing off of my disgusting self. 

Edited by Gil Bang
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Posted
7 hours ago, Gil Bang said:

Shitting in the kitchen...where we spend most of our time, at our comfortable island with nice barstools and a TV. Laptops out, etc.   GF says she's going to shower and then she'll see me in bed.  Within a few moments, it's a fucking 5 alarm fire in my colon.  This is a 4 bedroom main house, with one more in the guest house, and I destroy my undies before I can make it to the nearest.  Straight to the garbage, and I'm such a mess that it's right into that shower for a hosing off of my disgusting self. 

Guest house humblebrag...  Good for you

Posted

Doomlet is on the board for the second time this year. 

Came busting through the front door like a bat out of hell and told us he thinks he shit his pants because he had a bad fart that didn't feel quite right. Went straight to the bathroom (still wearing his bike helmet) where we heard him quietly mutter "oh, shit" to himself.

  • Haha 6
Posted

What just came out of me deserved it's own name, like a hurricane.  Lightning, thunder, high winds, lava flows, and fire all ensued.  Then a deathlike smell took over the room.  That shit had its own cancer.

 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
Posted
1 minute ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

Matched Brett’s maxim (good for that twice/year) with a 14 (!)-visit day. Bubbleguts as well.

Any of y’all lactose intolerant? I can’t peg it to anything necessarily.

The pegging could be a place to start?

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Posted
11 minutes ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

Matched Brett’s maxim (good for that twice/year) with a 14 (!)-visit day. Bubbleguts as well.

Any of y’all lactose intolerant? I can’t peg it to anything necessarily.

You eat at Chipotle recently? 

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Posted
On 8/27/2025 at 11:32 PM, Gil Bang said:

Sitting in the kitchen...where we spend most of our time, at our comfortable island with nice barstools and a TV. Laptops out, etc.   GF says she's going to shower and then she'll see me in bed.  Within a few moments, it's a fucking 5 alarm fire in my colon.  This is a 4 bedroom bathroom main house, with one more in the guest house, and I destroy my undies before I can make it to the nearest.  Straight to the garbage, and I'm such a mess that it's right into that shower for a hosing off of my disgusting self. 

Did ypu jump in the shower with your gf while covered in shit?

Blazing Saddles GIF by WTEDRadio

Posted
On 8/27/2025 at 11:32 PM, Gil Bang said:

Sitting in the kitchen...where we spend most of our time, at our comfortable island with nice barstools and a TV. Laptops out, etc.   GF says she's going to shower and then she'll see me in bed.  Within a few moments, it's a fucking 5 alarm fire in my colon.  This is a 4 bedroom bathroom main house, with one more in the guest house, and I destroy my undies before I can make it to the nearest.  Straight to the garbage, and I'm such a mess that it's right into that shower for a hosing off of my disgusting self. 


Nice humble grumble brag there about the house. ISWYDT… I see what you defecated  there.

Posted

Recovering from a colonoscopy this morning.  I did not like the past 24 hours.  I do not recommend them. 

I did not know the body could expel that much liquid from the wrong end...at such frequency.

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Posted
On 10/9/2025 at 11:11 AM, freyguy said:

Recovering from a colonoscopy this morning.  I did not like the past 24 hours.  I do not recommend them. 

I did not know the body could expel that much liquid from the wrong end...at such frequency.

Obviously you have never had bad food poisoning from eating Peruvian street food that looked suspicious but was really tasty and you had to finish all of it even though you knew better. 

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