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Shoxthemonkey

So the sheriff just stopped in my yard

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1 hour ago, GRHorn said:

I’ve managed to procure a picture of the anniversary steak. 
1-CD606-B3-63-AC-46-F7-B87-F-832314-EB8-

 

Carrot placement, pro move. 

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1 hour ago, Cajun said:

Does he/she get along with your gog?

 

😉

You should have hit me on the edit.  I was jamming you up on a typo while simultaneously doing the very same.

You're too kind.

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1 hour ago, Upgrayedd said:

You should pop a few rounds into the air.  Show them you mean business.

Wait, Shox is undocumented?

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40 minutes ago, StruggleBus said:

Happy anniversary dude. Make sure and take the old lady to pound town tonight 

After 47 years, I'm gonna guess she'll pass on that.

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2 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Looks like something is happening a half mile sw of me. 10-12 vehicles just rolled up in a hurry. There is an old hayshed and outbuildings there. I can only see the tops of the SUVs. Just waiting for the gunfire.

You sure this is actually happening and you’re not watching The Outsider?

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28 minutes ago, Sandman said:

After 47 years, I'm gonna guess she'll pass on that.

You would be mistaken. Headed for the bedroom now that the weather is over on tv. We're old, not broken.

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What I have been able to find out is that 2, maybe 3 suspects were trying to break into my closest neighbors house when one of the neighbors came home. They scattered and the manhunt was on.  I drove past a couple of parked vehicles with out of county plates on my way home. They were parked 1/4 mile from the targeted house and the same distance from my house. I'm guessing they were our suspects vehicles. I haven't heard any official news of their capture and Facebook is all over the place. I always have my pistol by the nightstand so  business as usual. Maybe sleep with one eye open. I'm sure the local cafe will be buzzing at breakfast tomorrow. I'll update as I get the real news. I'm just glad they went west to my neighbor and not east to my house. Wife was home alone and I hate to think how that could have gone. 

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That

24 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

You would be mistaken. Headed for the bedroom now that the weather is over on tv. We're old, not broken.

18 minutes between posts. Efficient. Happy anniversary. 

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29 minutes ago, Lerka Lerka said:

That

18 minutes between posts. Efficient. Happy anniversary. 

Does that include the 15 minutes of cleanup afterwards?

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2 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Wife was home alone and I hate to think how that could have gone. 

What, you thinking she'd of killed both and made you clean up the mess?

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7 hours ago, StruggleBus said:

Happy anniversary dude. Make sure and take the old lady to pound town tonight 

Perfect time to play “escaped convict” with the wife

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51 minutes ago, HornPhD said:

Perfect time to play “escaped convict” with the wife

Except she knows where the .45 is, too. 

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8 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

What I have been able to find out is that 2, maybe 3 suspects were trying to break into my closest neighbors house when one of the neighbors came home. They scattered and the manhunt was on.  I drove past a couple of parked vehicles with out of county plates on my way home. They were parked 1/4 mile from the targeted house and the same distance from my house. I'm guessing they were our suspects vehicles. I haven't heard any official news of their capture and Facebook is all over the place. I always have my pistol by the nightstand so  business as usual. Maybe sleep with one eye open. I'm sure the local cafe will be buzzing at breakfast tomorrow. I'll update as I get the real news. I'm just glad they went west to my neighbor and not east to my house. Wife was home alone and I hate to think how that could have gone. 

You know, this Pandemic is really taking a toll on small businesses.  Poor burglars searching far and wide for homes without someone inside. They're all gonna end up going broke. It's so depressing.

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3 hours ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

Fuck cops

Why would he need to do that?  Already established it was his anniversary and he was getting some. 

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14 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Backslid Mennonite. Lily white.

The deputies wouldn't tell me who is out there but they are clutching their ARs like they are in Kabul.

bitches-love-my-rumspringa-face_o_367247

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Here's the latest cafe scuttlebutt. 3 Hispanic roofers did something furtive and were chased by LEO to my neck of the woods. They ditched their vehicles by my North property line and went west on foot. They tried to get refuge in his outbuildings but the law cornered them there. Two were taken into custody but the third got away. The local County Sheriff and KHP were the agencies that I witnessed but others are claiming that ATF was involved. I dunno.

I have heard everything from them being undocumented, to armed robbery, to murder for their transgression but most likely it had more to do with them being unlike 99% of us round here. The only Hispanics in town own and operate the local Mexican Cantina. They will face some backlash, I'm guessing. The Karens want the city to throw all of the brown roofers out of town. Hope they don't mind waiting til Christmas to get their roofs fixed if they do that.

Wife and I had a lovely evening in spite of all  the commotion. This was the most excitement we've had around here since they blew up our donut shop for "Mars Attacks".

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11 minutes ago, Kyrie Eleison said:

bitches-love-my-rumspringa-face_o_367247

We were a couple of clicks more modern than Amish or Holdeman. We could have hubcaps and car radios, motherfucker!

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4 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

3 Hispanic roofers did something furtive and were chased by LEO to my neck of the woods.

That's the missing line from "Frijolero."

 

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14 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

We were a couple of clicks more modern than Amish or Holdeman. We could have hubcaps and car radios, motherfucker!

dude...i know how you rolled.  former Anabaptist myself.  MCC holla!

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4 hours ago, RPM said:

Except she knows where the .45 is, too. 

She has her own 9mm. She doesn't shoot often but she hits what she shoots at. Tough farmgirl that can be more self-reliant than many of the men I know. Too stubborn to ever ask for help.

We have been together now for 50 years and I can't imagine it without her. I honestly hope I go first.

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21 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

 I honestly hope I go first.

That's how I've always felt, it's pretty standard.  Wait, we talking anniversary sex or something deeper like death?

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13 hours ago, StruggleBus said:

Happy anniversary dude. Make sure and take the old lady to pound town tonight 

Knock the cobwebs out first.

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22 minutes ago, Kyrie Eleison said:

dude...i know how you rolled.  former Anabaptist myself.  MCC holla!

Did you ever make it to Hutchison, KS for the annual MCC auction? Mom and her church ladies always made a few quilts to sell. Most of them would bring a couple K. It was amazing how talented these folks were/are. I don't share their dogma but they are some hardworking, industrious, ready-to-give-a-helping-hand folks.

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30 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

I honestly hope I go first.

I hope you go first as well.  Widows always seem pretty horny.

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16 hours ago, MrBig said:

What if you stored all your drugs in the shed? Could you tell the cops no?

He's gotta keep the cops away from the shed, that's where he keeps the kids.

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Posted (edited)
16 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

I'll post them in the morning. 

The plane is heading back towards town. Maybe the manhunt is over.

Nope. He's back and circling closer

[Blazing]The sheriff is near[Saddles]

Edited by SHOOTER12

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17 hours ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Pics of overdone steak?

Untitled-attachment-00019.jpg

 

A disclaimer. I was eating in the TV room with the plate in my lap so I could see out of the windows and keep an eye on the manhunt. The steak was delicious and I'll cut the first mother that says it LDAF.

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19 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Dear God tell me 🙏 the dog's ok and you aren't black...

You should listen to this man. He's a shooter.

 

19 hours ago, irishtexan said:

If he were black he wouldn't have been able to come back and post.

...because he would've had to return the stolen laptop?

 

16 hours ago, StruggleBus said:

Happy anniversary dude. Make sure and take the old lady to pound town tonight 

He prob couldn't perform knowing that a 5'5" hispanic fella may be watching him through the window.

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5 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

You should listen to this man. He's a shooter.

 

...because he would've had to return the stolen laptop?

 

He prob couldn't perform knowing that a 5'5" hispanic fella may be standing on a chair watching him through the window.

Fify

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18 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Wife and I are married 47 years today. Hence the steaks. Memorable for sure.

Pics of wife. Skip the steak.

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14 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

It's all dust and cobwebs. Very little cleanup required.

Sounds very familiar.

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3 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Where the hell you been, Bro? Geriatric sex, firearms and food talk. I expected you earlier.

See my previous post. 
Plus I’ve been dealing with a malfunctioning combination lock on my gun safe Half the day today.

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Just now, Armybrat said:

Plus I’ve been dealing with a malfunctioning combination lock on my gun safe Half the day today.

you forgot the combination again, didn't you? you spent half the day looking for your faded, torn up notebook with passwords.

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4 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Here's the latest cafe scuttlebutt. 3 Hispanic roofers did something furtive and were chased by LEO to my neck of the woods. They ditched their vehicles by my North property line and went west on foot. They tried to get refuge in his outbuildings but the law cornered them there. Two were taken into custody but the third got away. The local County Sheriff and KHP were the agencies that I witnessed but others are claiming that ATF was involved. I dunno.

I have heard everything from them being undocumented, to armed robbery, to murder for their transgression but most likely it had more to do with them being unlike 99% of us round here. The only Hispanics in town own and operate the local Mexican Cantina. They will face some backlash, I'm guessing. The Karens want the city to throw all of the brown roofers out of town. Hope they don't mind waiting til Christmas to get their roofs fixed if they do that.

Wife and I had a lovely evening in spite of all  the commotion. This was the most excitement we've had around here since they blew up our donut shop for "Mars Attacks".

Sumbitches probably did a sloppy nailover job.

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8 minutes ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

Where the hell you been, Bro? Geriatric sex, firearms and food talk. I expected you earlier.

And Happy Anniversary, we’ll celebrate our 53rd next month.

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3 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

And Happy Anniversary, we’ll celebrate our 53rd next month.

FTW...shox and brat got it going on.

Congrats guys

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Posted (edited)
18 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

And Happy Anniversary, we’ll celebrate our 53rd next month.

53rd in July.  It was the Summer of Love, after all.

 

And Happy Anniversary to both of you couples.

Edited by abuelo gringo

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Damn gentlemen, congrats on the longevity and those anniversaries. 

 

Has it ever been determined who the oldest poster is on the Shag errr Surly?

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21 hours ago, gmr548 said:

Narrator: OP was the fugitive.

Narrator:  OP is cooking said (steaks)fugitives.  

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19 minutes ago, Lerka Lerka said:

Damn gentlemen, congrats on the longevity and those anniversaries. 

 

Has it ever been determined who the oldest poster is on the Shag errr Surly?

There is at least one oldfart octogenarian posting here, or so it appears. Forgot his handle.

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