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Star Wars Episode IX

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A lot of work to do after TLJ if they want to get this back on track.  Everyone will go see it because they want to see how this part of the story ends, but is says something about the power of the original that most folks are more interested in the cameos and harkening back to the OT.

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3 minutes ago, mdmost said:

I've maintained for a while that it should've been one vision/writer for the entire saga. JJ/Kasdan should've written all 3 movies. 

This.  Even if JJ wanted to go off and do other stuff, should have been somebody like Kasdan, or even Filon acting like a Kevin Feige so that somebody like Johnson isn’t left to fill in the pieces.   

Thats what’s stunning.  The MCU formula works for things like Star Wars (hell, Star Wars was the first sci-fi film universe), and it was in the House of Mouse.  

Makes you wonder what Kennedy has on everybody.  

At least Lando can save the day.  

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She has billions of dollars for Disney. 

I did see that Iger said Star Wars movies were going to take a break after IX. I'd imagine they'll focus more on Disney+ offerings. A strong rumor is they might announce an Obi Wan with Ewan McGregor deal this weekend. 

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11 minutes ago, mdmost said:

She has billions of dollars for Disney. 

I did see that Iger said Star Wars movies were going to take a break after IX. I'd imagine they'll focus more on Disney+ offerings. A strong rumor is they might announce an Obi Wan with Ewan McGregor deal this weekend. 

There's an original Star Wars tv series being developed as well.

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Han - murdered by his son

Luke - personality crisis, not at all likable anymore, dies fighting his nephew

Leia - smoked too many deathstix.  Watches her family die and the new Republic she helped create destroyed at the hands of her son

Akbar - unceremoniously blown out of a ship

Did I forget anyone?

 

So what do they have in store for Lando? 

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I think we already assumed that.  I'm guessing he won't be confident and full of swagger anymore, instead broken down, and probably beheaded by Kylo in the end.

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I do like that it seemed to focus on the decent characters.  JJ took stock of the situation and said he can make something out of Rey, Kylo, Chewy, BB8.  Have to have Finn and Poe because they are too big to just disappear.  Get an assist from the one OT character we haven't fucked up yet.  Pull in Emperor, emphasizing what you remember about him from the OT instead of the Space Taxation trilogy.  Maz, Rose, Phasma, Benecio del Toro, Mad Eyed Moody's son mercifully cut out.  I'd say its a good trailer considering what Rian Johnson handed him.

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39 minutes ago, Red Five said:

Oh I’m sure Lando has a horrible case of space AIDS.

He's reinstalling the glory hole on the Falcon.

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1 hour ago, mdmost said:

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

Star Wars: Every Rose has it's Thorn

Story of Rose and Finn's marriage and rise to the top of the Empire

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Posted (edited)

A good size chunk of the Death Star dish and a portion of the actual body. So is this Endor, another moon, or the planet Endor orbits?

Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-1.50.00-PM-768

Edited by mdmost

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2 hours ago, UT_OB1 said:

So what do they have in store for Lando? 

didn't they make him a robosexual in that stupid Solo movie? so they've already "got" him

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1 hour ago, mdmost said:

A good size chunk of the Death Star dish and a portion of the actual body. So is this Endor, another moon, or the planet Endor orbits?

Screen-Shot-2019-04-12-at-1.50.00-PM-768

thank God

I was worried we'd go two movies in a row without a Death Star or other superweapon!!!!!!

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It's a Death Star?

It's not a Death Star. It's THE Death Star. (riffed from Groundhog Day)

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The preview did nothing to get me excited about the movie.  With TFA, Rogue One, and TLJ, I wanted to see the movie first day and couldn't wait.  After TLJ and Solo, I intend to see IX at some point, but won't be in any hurry and this preview did nothing to change that.  

In contrast, waiting for End Game reminds me of being a student trying to get through the last few hours before summer break starts.  Every second is an eternity.  Maybe Kevin Feige needs to give Katherine Kennedy some pointers.  

Marvel proves Disney can clearly get it right.  But they currently aren't with Star Wars.

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5 minutes ago, mdmost said:

It's a Death Star?

It's not a Death Star. It's THE Death Star. (riffed from Groundhog Day)

:D

All that "crashed Empire weapon" artwork-- like this, like the Star Destroyer in Episode 7-- is fucking awesome. 

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2 hours ago, Patrick Bateman said:

A lot of work to do after TLJ if they want to get this back on track.  Everyone will go see it because they want to see how this part of the story ends, but is says something about the power of the original that most folks are more interested in the cameos and harkening back to the OT.

 

Disagree. It's easy to take shots at something when it's not as perfect as you or someone else think it will or should be. (Not a knock on you just the way of the social media world we live in) 

There are plenty of people who will love it on it's on and sure some will love the cameo's and back stories that only the true hardcore series fans will get or love but it is what it is. 

It's the same shit with GOT. No matter how perfectly it ends there will be someone who hates it. It's just how things work now. 

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Posted (edited)
6 minutes ago, JimmyHoffa said:

No matter how perfectly it ends there will be someone who hates it. It's just how things work now. 

I think it's equally true that they way it is now, even if a movie is nothing more a soulless corporate exploitation of the nostalgia-addicted Gen-X perma-adolescents, there will be people lined up to *passionately* defend it. 

 

Edited by SwanderedTalent

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The title is kind of intriguing because the only Skywalker’s left are Kylo and Leigh. Kylo is only half and Leigh doesn’t really use the force. That has to mean Vader and Luke will be featured, so I think this is where JJ will tie everything together like he talked about doing. 

Also  there is more evidence of the “tying all episodes together“ thing with palp laughing at the end;  which in the whole grand scheme of things means he’s been the primary villain through the whole saga. 

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Posted (edited)

Palpatine was pulling the strings the whole time, Snoke was his number 2.  Palpatine allowed Ren to kill Snoke and ascend to be his number 2.  

 

Well I guess it goes from God to Jerry to Kent to Palpatine to Snoke to Ren to the cleaners

Edited by Surly Bevo

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Also Rey is going to be Ren's twin sister.  Leia knows, Rey was dumped at birth to protect her, Han didn't know...

 

 

COMMENCE PHLEGMGASM

 

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13 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

Also Rey is going to be Ren's twin sister.  Leia knows, Rey was dumped at birth to protect her, Han didn't know...

 

 

COMMENCE PHLEGMGASM

 

Rian Johnson has left the chat

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3 hours ago, Surly Bevo said:

What a dumb fucking title

Why? We have NO idea what the meaning of the title is, and honestly, it makes me very intrigued.

3 hours ago, Surly Bevo said:

And that title after they just spent all of the last piece of trash saying "throw away the past, anybody can use the Force, blah blah blah blah" . 

Fucking dipshits....just call it "Return of Lens Flair and Too Much Fan Service"

 

 

(sufficient bitching for you MDMost?)

Yeah I'm thinking you should probably just save yourself the trouble and not only not see this movie, but probably shouldn't even come to this thread if you're that aggravated by a title/trailer.

3 hours ago, mdmost said:

Ha. I love that TLJ still makes some of you twist off. Maybe everyone's a Skywalker after this movie. I've maintained for a while that it should've been one vision/writer for the entire saga. JJ/Kasdan should've written all 3 movies. 

Agreed.  I loved JJ getting the first shot, and wished he had just kept doing them.

And this is coming from a guy that LOVED TLJ and what Johnson did.  I know everyone on here shits on it, but I know just as many, if not more, that really liked that movie and what they did.

 

35 minutes ago, JimmyHoffa said:

 

Disagree. It's easy to take shots at something when it's not as perfect as you or someone else think it will or should be. (Not a knock on you just the way of the social media world we live in) 

There are plenty of people who will love it on it's on and sure some will love the cameo's and back stories that only the true hardcore series fans will get or love but it is what it is. 

It's the same shit with GOT. No matter how perfectly it ends there will be someone who hates it. It's just how things work now. 

Yep, no matter what, in this day and age, someone will shit on it. TLJ was a great movie...but I can definitely understand the complaints of people and why some people completely disliked it.  But acting like the movie was trash is way too far IMO.

29 minutes ago, SwanderedTalent said:

I think it's equally true that they way it is now, even if a movie is nothing more a soulless corporate exploitation of the nostalgia-addicted Gen-X perma-adolescents, there will be people lined up to *passionately* defend it. 

 

You mean people who actually like a movie will defend it against a bunch of people who think what they think is more important than what you do?

 

Honestly, there were WAY more people bitching and complaining about it than defending it, because it wasn't worth the trouble.  AS usual, the people bitching were the loudest voices over people who liked it or even loved it.  Just remember the TLJ thread, those of us who really liked it, outside of 1 or 2 people who were dumb, stayed out of the thread once we realized that the thread had just turned into a bash fest and anyone saying other wise was roasted.

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I feel like the Knights of Ren will play an average role because johnson decided not to use them for some stupid reason, thus giving jj not enough movie time to create a proper back story.

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We may get our Ewoks yet! Party at the old Endor forest moon tree village y’all!!!!!

 

zombie Vader and Palpatine are amped up to 11.

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Posted (edited)

I think the title has more to do with Rey and the Force sensitive followers not having to live within the rigidness of the Jedi Order since Luke was the last of the Jedi trained in the old ways. Instead Rey starts a new order, the Order of Skywalker. 

Someone else brought up the interesting point that given JJ's homage tendencies, this could all be a live action homage to Dark Empire. We'll see if Rey drops an AT-AT walker with the Force. In that comic, the Emperor lived through cloning. 

Edited by mdmost

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Episode 8: "Let the past die, kill it if you have to!" 

Episode 9: "LOL, j/k.  Nothing ever really dies."  Here's some Lando and Palpatine and look, it's the Death Star!

or

Episode 7: "Helmet on!"

Episode 8: "Helmet off!"

Episode 9: "Helmet on!"

Honestly, I'm kinda happy they're bringing Palpy back.  This entire trilogy is so pants on head retarded at this point that why the fuck not?  Disney should just steal the shit out of that EU storyline they turned their noses up at when they took over where Palps clones himself.  We need another derp-level superweapon, too.  So throw in the Sun Crusher which is an indestructible starfighter that wipes out entire systems by making their suns go nova.  Zombie-Palps riding the Sun Crusher to complete galaxy-wide domination.  I like it. 

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6 hours ago, SuingToGetAMessageBoard? said:

I do like that it seemed to focus on the decent characters.  JJ took stock of the situation and said he can make something out of Rey, Kylo, Chewy, BB8..... I'd say its a good trailer considering what Rian Johnson handed him.

 

7 hours ago, Patrick Bateman said:

A lot of work to do after TLJ if they want to get this back on track.  Everyone will go see it because they want to see how this part of the story ends, but is says something about the power of the original that most folks are more interested in the cameos and harkening back to the OT.

I don't trust JJ Abrams at all to "fix" what happened in TLJ, because. JJ (and Kennedy) is the reason why TLJ ended up going in the direction it did, and JJ fucked up the OT.  Rian should never have been handed the keys and said "just do whatever, we don't actually have any backstories or overall arcs, we just wanted to remake A New Hope.  Go figure it out yourself. Maybe Rey is a Skywalker or a Palpatine or another Chosen One, maybe she's a nobody, we don't know and we don't give a fuck."  

Rian should have been working off of a really thick Star Wars Bible detailing the backstories for Rey, Snoke, the Knights of Ren, what exactly happened to Luke, etc., and that Star Wars Bible should have basically laid out what the endings would been in VIII and IX.  Rian didn't need to have blinders on and forced into staying within a narrow lane, but he was also not the person who should have been told to go with whatever.  

Trying to figure shit out in post is part of what Lucas fucked up in the prequels, and it came back all these years later with another director.  How fucking ironic.

/beginStarWarsNerdRant

This is why JJ Abrams can easily fuck up again.  For all of JJ's fan service, he fucked up two crucial things:

1. He didn't show us The Trio together, and he didn't give us Lando.  And because of Harrison's stipulations about Han needing to die, there was never going to be another chance to see the three together on film.  And the times that two members of The Trio met up, were fucking sad, which leads to #2

2. Most importantly: He completely fucking destroyed the happy ending that the original trilogy built up to in ROTJ.  He spent the previous 24 hours going crazy at a Taco Bell, loaded up on ExLax, then walked in to the room, pulled down his pants, and just shit all over the ending of ROTJ.  Utterly shit all over it.  He made sure that Leia and Han had ended up miserable and separated, feeling like failures as parents, that Luke would end his life full of anger and regret and feeling like a failure as an uncle and a Jedi Master.  That Han would literally lose the Falcon, one of the most iconic things that defined him as a man and as a pilot.  That Leia would watch everything she dedicated her life to utterly ruined with the help of her sun, with her and her Sad Band of Followers on the run and with no hope.

JJ took a great group of characters who had experienced lows and highs together, and who got to go out on a high note, and he split them up and had them end their lives as failures.  He took everything that they had worked hard for and just destroyed it.  Cheap storytelling 101.

/endStarWarsNerdRant

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If WB and Rowling were dumb enough to give JJ Abrams the chance to make a Harry Potter film sequel, here is how it would play out:

  • Hogwarts would quickly be turned into a smoking hole in the ground by a group who had no reason for being powerful enough to do it within such a short amount of time.
  • Hagrid would be dead from being gang-raped by those winged eagle horse things.
  • Ron would be killed by his son for no discernible reason other than the actor's contract demanded it.
  • Hermione would have watched Hogwarts destroyed, and would have seen Ron and Harry only once in the previous 10 years.
  • Harry would be a bearded old recluse drinking blue milk he gets from milking elves (against their will) every morning.
  • Mad Eye Moody's son would be a sniveling little shit who gets pranked by owls and talking letters.
  • And so on.

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I assume if JJ is really tying it all together, Palpatine had in fact figured out the Darth Plagueis secret of how to manipulate the force to create life and cheat death.  Hell maybe he knew all along.  He created Anakin, he created Rey, he cheated death, blah blah blah.  He's behind the First Order and how they were able to rise so quickly from the ashes of the Empire.  He's like the Joker to Batman...they are destined to do this for a long long time.

Scene....lens flare, roll credits

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If the title means he’s just going to blatantly cast off Rian and TLJ by bringing Luke back and giving him a proper send off, then I’m loving it.  “He didn’t die a bitter old man who refuses to actually fight!  He just disappeared because, um ... that was also a hologram projection and not the real Luke!” 

If that’s not what is going to happen, then it’s a bizarre title.  Although I admit it’s probably good marketing to get people wondering.

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13 hours ago, hornbri said:

oh shit that is good

 

13 hours ago, mdmost said:

The member berries got me on that Lando yell and Emperor cackle. I mean if you want a guy to take this home, JJ is the guy for the job.

I've watched it 3x as many of that last piece of shit we got.

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12 hours ago, UT_OB1 said:

So what do they have in store for Lando? 

Only way to save this Maxine Waters of a movie is for the last shot to be of Lando sitting on the Iron Thrown.

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