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Posted
reminds me of that kiddo song, you know back when it was marginally acceptable to lose control of your butthole... when you feel something ooze and you know it's coming loose, diarrhea... 

This one was always good for a laugh on my youth baseball team in the late 70’s..

When you’re sliding into home and you start to feel the foam….
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Posted

This whole line of posts hits way too close to home. While on a run in Ute Valley Park I had to leave a deposit in some bushes off the trail about 2 miles in. I was not prepared and it was not nice. 

Posted

https://www.cnn.com/2025/07/28/health/alzheimers-disease-walking-exercise-wellness

 

I'm sure all these studies are good and absolutely movement is important.  My own Father is starting to exhibit sure signs of sundowner's and random lost moments. At other times sharp as a tack, just talks slower.  He's 81.  He always took care of his cardio.  Was random with his weight lifting.  Slim build.  Due to various reasons we've never been super close.  I called him on Father's Day and we had a 20 minute conversation.  Everything was fine and then around minute 15 he couldn't follow me at all.  Shook me (and I didn't think it would).  I had heard about him having random falls here and there.  I'm going to visit him in August because I know once this stuff starts it never gets better.

I guess I'm saying obviously we should do the best we can regarding exercise, diet, e.t.c but there are no guarantees other than death one day.  I know duh, that's no revelation.    My Dad is the youngest of four brothers all still alive.  Some have had cancer battles, one has a pace maker, all 3 drink.  two of them heavily.  Dad is a teetotaller.  Yet Dad is the one developing quite obvious dementia symptoms.  For all I know the exercise kept him from developing them earlier.  

I resemble him physically more than any of my other siblings.  So it spooks me that I'm looking at a similar fate at some point regardless of whether I exercise, take care of my diet, whatever.

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Posted

Incoming philosophical question alert:

Does it really suck though? Isn’t it just the natural order of things? And if you know it’s coming, and allow yourself to be ok with it not sucking, doesn’t that just help us appreciate and make the most out of whatever time we have?

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Posted
4 hours ago, MC Fresh Breath said:

https://www.cnn.com/2025/07/28/health/alzheimers-disease-walking-exercise-wellness

 

I'm sure all these studies are good and absolutely movement is important.  My own Father is starting to exhibit sure signs of sundowner's and random lost moments. At other times sharp as a tack, just talks slower.  He's 81.  He always took care of his cardio.  Was random with his weight lifting.  Slim build.  Due to various reasons we've never been super close.  I called him on Father's Day and we had a 20 minute conversation.  Everything was fine and then around minute 15 he couldn't follow me at all.  Shook me (and I didn't think it would).  I had heard about him having random falls here and there.  I'm going to visit him in August because I know once this stuff starts it never gets better.

I guess I'm saying obviously we should do the best we can regarding exercise, diet, e.t.c but there are no guarantees other than death one day.  I know duh, that's no revelation.    My Dad is the youngest of four brothers all still alive.  Some have had cancer battles, one has a pace maker, all 3 drink.  two of them heavily.  Dad is a teetotaller.  Yet Dad is the one developing quite obvious dementia symptoms.  For all I know the exercise kept him from developing them earlier.  

I resemble him physically more than any of my other siblings.  So it spooks me that I'm looking at a similar fate at some point regardless of whether I exercise, take care of my diet, whatever.

You and I could be siblings. Very similar story with my dad that died from Alzheimer’s complications (as did his dad). Very healthy, hardworking lifestyle, lifelong runner, did all the right things. And that weighs heavily on me. 

 

3 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Incoming philosophical question alert:

Does it really suck though? Isn’t it just the natural order of things? And if you know it’s coming, and allow yourself to be ok with it not sucking, doesn’t that just help us appreciate and make the most out of whatever time we have?

Completely endorsed. One can do all the things and still end up with dementia, or get hit by a piece of a falling airplane. The point is to make peace with that. 

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Posted
25 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Incoming philosophical question alert:

Does it really suck though? Isn’t it just the natural order of things? And if you know it’s coming, and allow yourself to be ok with it not sucking, doesn’t that just help us appreciate and make the most out of whatever time we have?

I used to think like that. I mean nothing I can do about it and I have probably 7-8 reasons why it's bothering me at this time that i could go into but bottom line, it bothers me.

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Posted

Totally get that. Honest question - what good is letting it bother you do?

And for the record, I’m not suggesting it isn’t normal human nature to let it bother you because of course it is. Im just asking another philosophical question…

Posted
3 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Totally get that. Honest question - what good is letting it bother you do?

And for the record, I’m not suggesting it isn’t normal human nature to let it bother you because of course it is. Im just asking another philosophical question…

I’ve been actively contemplating this very question for a few months. I’m running out the door to do something that provides a nice break from the existential crisis, I’ll come back and answer, tonight or in the morning. 

Posted
46 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Incoming philosophical question alert:

Does it really suck though? Isn’t it just the natural order of things? And if you know it’s coming, and allow yourself to be ok with it not sucking, doesn’t that just help us appreciate and make the most out of whatever time we have?

That's a fair discussion and I don't have a good answer.  I know logically that airplanes are the safest way to travel.  But sometimes turbulence scares me on a non-logical level. No real logic to the fear.  Just happens.  I even know in my head 'you're being stupid right now.'   Doesn't always stop it. 

I personally don't believe in an afterlife.  And I mean no offense at all to those who do.  But I grew up believing in one so death wasn't scary, it was just the next phase.   Now I personally hate the idea of non existence.  I know one day its coming and there is nothing I can do about it.  But I still hate the idea.   But I hate even more the idea of losing my brain as a I go out.  I guess its the ego.  I hate the idea of being confused and lost even more so than we are on a regular basis.  I'm also very aware that I'm lucky enough to be enjoying life in my fifties way more than my 30s.  I live in a place I love with people I love.  Related to your question I absolutely give attention and gratitude to the every day of existence (and knowledge of said existence).  I relish all the discussions with my teenagers whenever they happen.  I'm quite attuned to the impermanence of it all and try to just be mindful of the moment.  But yeah, seeing my otherwise healthy Father start to lose it causes me to be a bit sad, a bit depressed, a bit fearful.  Sorry for the ramble.

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Posted (edited)

Lucky or unlucky, take your pick, but my dad passed away before he ever had a chance to go down the dementia road. I don’t have a family history of it.   Cancer on the other hand?  Got that history for sure.  I’m getting all my normal checkups and screenings as they are suggested. I stay active and fit. Just turned 60.  Getting old sucks but it beats the alternative as they say. 

Edited by CycleTex87
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Posted (edited)

Coming back to the question… I heard someone I respect say that much of life’s really negative emotions originate from a similar source - unmet or failed or missed expectations. 

for me, I turn 50 in a month. The last five years have been really hard after the decade from 35-45, while stressful to the ninth degree was incredibly rewarding. So I think unmet expectations is a big part of why I have the negative feelings right now. Angst, worry, fear, boredom, frustration, remorse, fatigue, and regret. 

part of the unmet expectations is realizing that the blue sky opportunities I love so much are quickly fading and I haven’t done half of what I want to do. It’s just an age thing but I don’t have 30 years in front of me to start and grow a business and sell it, or to build a mid sized law firm, or circumnavigate the world on a sailboat, although everyone of those things could still happen but the window is closing and I can see it, 10 years ago it was different, it still felt like I had all the time in the world. 

my year last year was absolutely one of the worst years of my life, I’m still struggling with some PTSD due to 7 months of illness. So I need to leave space for improvement but that 7 months kinda broke my exuberance and optimism for the future and put a finite limit on what I can be and do in a way nothing else has done.

there’s a scene in the weather man that encapsulates part of what I’m trying to say so well. The reductionist experience of considering all the people he could become until all that remains is who he is, the weatherman nails it for me (the last 30 seconds are unnecessary)

the narrowing of possibility down to the one thing is what gets me most. I thrive on hope, possibility, options, new beginnings, fresh starts and the blue sky of opportunity. I feel like aging slowly takes a lot of that away, and it really, really gets to me. 

Edited by troph
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