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Judge Roybeanbag

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it’s not outrageous.  it’s about 1/6 lb of ground beef, plus ketchup and onions and all the other sloppy joe shit, per sandwich.  and there’s probably shitty potato salad and lays potato chips and other garbage involved.  some people are gonna eat more than one serving, most probably won’t. 

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7 hours ago, futureman said:

it’s not outrageous.  it’s about 1/6 lb of ground beef, plus ketchup and onions and all the other sloppy joe shit, per sandwich.  and there’s probably shitty potato salad and lays potato chips and other garbage involved.  some people are gonna eat more than one serving, most probably won’t. 

IMG_2712.thumb.jpeg.c1da79568a601de4d549f6d91be4800c.jpeg

“No seconds until you finish your salad” limits consumption. 

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IMG_2712.thumb.jpeg.c1da79568a601de4d549f6d91be4800c.jpeg
“No seconds until you finish your salad” limits consumption. 

I had aunts and a grandmother who had the various forms of green congealed salad. Jesus have mercy they were bad. I know why these things are a part of Texas cuisine but that didn’t mean they had to be carried on. One aunt made a green one with tuna fish, pineapple, pecans, and miracle whip. A wiggly ring o vomit in my book.
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On 6/30/2023 at 10:02 AM, Brisketexan said:

In Argentina, the mayo/ketchup combo is called "salsa golf," and they put that shit on EVERYTHING.  

Same for Puerto Rico, but they call it mayoketchup, or mayokechu. They put garlic and lemon juice in as well. 

On 6/30/2023 at 3:31 PM, Kennythetiger said:

I think I have mentioned this to you before, but she also used butter as a condiment on our ham sandwiches, something else that I haven’t seen since her passing. Weird as shit to me growing up, but makes perfect sense now, as they milked cows through the 30s and 40s. Homemade butter was probably all that they had. 

Spent my summers in Ireland growing up and my family there airways used butter as their sandwich spread. It was weird for an American kid to come in for for a lunch of ham and butter sandwiches and hot tea with cream and sugar.  But I grew to love it. 

Edited by threesheets
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2 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:


https://www.tastingtable.com/1118357/the-rich-history-of-jell-o-salad/

Here you go. It’s a confluence of the advent of refrigeration, a lack of fresh veg out of season, and women’s magazines from 1900’s into the 60’s. Awful.

you said “texas cuisine” which implies some sort of connection with the state.  nothing in that article says anything about texas. 

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2 hours ago, futureman said:

 nothing in that article says anything about texas. 

I can attest to seeing those "Jell-o salad" concoctions at pot luck gatherings. 100% of the time it was an old lady behind the abomination. I mean sometimes they actually looked good, like dessert good. Then you make the fatal mistake of taking a bite. Life lessons learned as a child.

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you said “texas cuisine” which implies some sort of connection with the state.  nothing in that article says anything about texas. 

I’m not saying these were invented in Texas but they sure as shit were adopted like they were. If you look at Junior League cookbooks of every Texas town from the 50’s they are full of these things, and were featured at all church potlucks, funeral spreads, barbecues, and family gatherings.
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I’m with you. I skipped the tomatoes, so maybe it wasn’t a true Chicago dog. But I loaded up on a extra sport peppers. And the celery salt is a nice touch.

I usually get extra yellow mustard and onion, the neon relish, sport peppers, and the celery salt. The pickle goes on the side. Some Chicagoans scoff at my exclusion of a watery tomato.
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21 minutes ago, South Austin said:

I’m with you. I skipped the tomatoes, so maybe it wasn’t a true Chicago dog. But I loaded up on a extra sport peppers. And the celery salt is a nice touch.

We're in complete alignment here.  I love sport peppers, agree on the celery salt.

That jello salad bullshit was a scourge to all of middle America, apparently.  Very common in the Midwest when I was growing up.

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2 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:


I’m not saying these were invented in Texas but they sure as shit were adopted like they were. If you look at Junior League cookbooks of every Texas town from the 50’s they are full of these things, and were featured at all church potlucks, funeral spreads, barbecues, and family gatherings.

Fucking church potlucks.  I grew up going to a Catholic church in Houston, old-school.  Ethnic mix was a lotta czechs, italians, some irish, some hispanic.  A lot of long-time Texans, so some classic Texas grub too (chili, bbq).  Any church potluck type thing was alright.

After I married my wife, we joined a Presbyterian church.  In white West Austin.  Dear God.  The white blandness is painful.  But the best experience was many years ago, we did a joint MLK day service with Ebenezer Baptist, a historically black congregation on the east side.  We did a joint potluck afterwards.  The contrast between the sad casserole-y jello salad-y shit the Presbyterians brought, vs. the soul food cooked with love from the Ebenezer folks was brutal.  Our pastor at the time had grown up poor in rural North Carolina.  His running buddies were the white and black kids who lived along their dirt road....dude knew good grub.  So, I couldn't even get mad at him when I headed back to the serving line for seconds, including a scoop of some of the best damned grits I'd ever had....and he beat me to it, looked me right in the eye with a smile, and took the last goddamned serving of those grits.  Well-played, padre.

TLDR: WASP church potlucks are an abomination.  Ethnic churches and Catholic churches bring the goodness.

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2 hours ago, South Austin said:

I’m with you. I skipped the tomatoes, so maybe it wasn’t a true Chicago dog. But I loaded up on a extra sport peppers. And the celery salt is a nice touch.

Gotta admit I fully embrace the Chicago Dog. But I am a bohemian.

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21 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Fucking church potlucks.  I grew up going to a Catholic church in Houston, old-school.  Ethnic mix was a lotta czechs, italians, some irish, some hispanic.  A lot of long-time Texans, so some classic Texas grub too (chili, bbq).  Any church potluck type thing was alright.

After I married my wife, we joined a Presbyterian church.  In white West Austin.  Dear God.  The white blandness is painful.  But the best experience was many years ago, we did a joint MLK day service with Ebenezer Baptist, a historically black congregation on the east side.  We did a joint potluck afterwards.  The contrast between the sad casserole-y jello salad-y shit the Presbyterians brought, vs. the soul food cooked with love from the Ebenezer folks was brutal.  Our pastor at the time had grown up poor in rural North Carolina.  His running buddies were the white and black kids who lived along their dirt road....dude knew good grub.  So, I couldn't even get mad at him when I headed back to the serving line for seconds, including a scoop of some of the best damned grits I'd ever had....and he beat me to it, looked me right in the eye with a smile, and took the last goddamned serving of those grits.  Well-played, padre.

TLDR: WASP church potlucks are an abomination.  Ethnic churches and Catholic churches bring the goodness.

Can confirm on the Catholic side.  I grew up in very white (like literally 99% White in my county) very small, and very German Catholic town in rural north Iowa.  While we did get our share of awful Midwestern jello salads, the main course was always some kind of excellent pork product.  In the summer it was always brats and kraut with plenty of cold beer, and in the fall or winter it was always roasters full of smoked pork loin.  From what I could tell in neighboring towns, the Lutherans were far more apt to have some kind of mush casserole be the center piece.

The next county over had a lot of Czech communities, and their Catholic events were always centered on brats, jaeternice and potatoes, and kolaches.

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5 hours ago, RPM said:

There's a reason they're called sport peppers.

I actually never heard of sport peppers until I started researching the Chicago dog in advance of my trip. And I’m a fan of peppers and use them regularly—jalapeño, serrano, habanero, banana, etc.  But for my entire life until recently I’d never heard of a sport pepper. 

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9 hours ago, Texzilla58 said:


I’m not saying these were invented in Texas but they sure as shit were adopted like they were. If you look at Junior League cookbooks of every Texas town from the 50’s they are full of these things, and were featured at all church potlucks, funeral spreads, barbecues, and family gatherings.

 

6 hours ago, Underdog said:

The Jello salad was a staple at family reunions, don't remember which Aunt brought it but it was a guaranteed tap upside the noggin if a piece of it wasn't on my plate in a show of good manners. 

Yep. Both of these.

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Fucking church potlucks.  I grew up going to a Catholic church in Houston, old-school.  Ethnic mix was a lotta czechs, italians, some irish, some hispanic.  A lot of long-time Texans, so some classic Texas grub too (chili, bbq).  Any church potluck type thing was alright.
After I married my wife, we joined a Presbyterian church.  In white West Austin.  Dear God.  The white blandness is painful.  But the best experience was many years ago, we did a joint MLK day service with Ebenezer Baptist, a historically black congregation on the east side.  We did a joint potluck afterwards.  The contrast between the sad casserole-y jello salad-y shit the Presbyterians brought, vs. the soul food cooked with love from the Ebenezer folks was brutal.  Our pastor at the time had grown up poor in rural North Carolina.  His running buddies were the white and black kids who lived along their dirt road....dude knew good grub.  So, I couldn't even get mad at him when I headed back to the serving line for seconds, including a scoop of some of the best damned grits I'd ever had....and he beat me to it, looked me right in the eye with a smile, and took the last goddamned serving of those grits.  Well-played, padre.
TLDR: WASP church potlucks are an abomination.  Ethnic churches and Catholic churches bring the goodness.

I believe you are using the shittiness of your congregation’s culinary blandness to indict all churches or Presbyterians.

Frankly I hate potlucks. Hmmm was that tamale casserole made by that elderly cat lady that is always covered in hair? Was that hummingbird cake made by the youth minister that hasn’t bathed in years? I just don’t trust strangers to cook food with proper sanitation.

Or take a look at the modern church potluck. Most folks don’t cook worth a shit so they stop and pick something up. Not that delectable fried chicken panfried in a cast iron skillet. A box or three of Chicken express. “I got extra sauces!” A couple gallon jugs of Walmart lemonade. A $3 pie. Some shitty Aldi cookies. It’s terrible.
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Late night snack of cheese in a can, low-fat Triscuits, and orange:pineapple screwdriver. f8a949aff4c4b245cadccf11253129e9.jpg

A sign that my marriage is a great match: my wife came home with triscuits and that canned cheese the other day. The couple that snacks together stays together, or something.
Or, alternatively…shit, am I married to Steel Shank?
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1 hour ago, Brisketexan said:


A sign that my marriage is a great match: my wife came home with triscuits and that canned cheese the other day. The couple that snacks together stays together, or something.
Or, alternatively…shit, am I married to Steel Shank?

It would make for a wacky sitcom. I'll be Ricky, you can be Lucy.

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On 7/3/2023 at 10:36 AM, Al_4_ISU said:

Can confirm on the Catholic side.  I grew up in very white (like literally 99% White in my county) very small, and very German Catholic town in rural north Iowa.  While we did get our share of awful Midwestern jello salads, the main course was always some kind of excellent pork product.  In the summer it was always brats and kraut with plenty of cold beer, and in the fall or winter it was always roasters full of smoked pork loin.  From what I could tell in neighboring towns, the Lutherans were far more apt to have some kind of mush casserole be the center piece.

The next county over had a lot of Czech communities, and their Catholic events were always centered on brats, jaeternice and potatoes, and kolaches.

May-Oct is prime church picnic time here in CenTex.  Played a picnic in Ammannsville on Father’s Day, at the end they were selling leftover fried chicken (huge pieces) for a dollar apiece and a gallon baggie full of smoked sausage for 5 bucks just to get rid of it… 

IMG_1787.jpeg

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22 hours ago, Steel Shank said:

Late night snack of cheese in a can, low-fat Triscuits, and orange:pineapple screwdriver. f8a949aff4c4b245cadccf11253129e9.jpg

A black and white filter and a firearm would really complete the moment. 

Edited by Al Czervik
Updating to not be 1985
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