Jump to content

The stupidest worst selfish asshole things dumbasses do on the road


wood

Recommended Posts

On 4/7/2018 at 1:09 AM, Papa Johnny Road said:

I can’t stand dickheads that use the shoulder of the road or emergency lane to pass slow/stopped traffic on the way to work. Then they flip the bird when I dont let them back onto the highway when that lane ends. 

Saw a chick the other day southbound on Manchaca Road, blowing by a bunch of stopped rush-hour up traffic, using the right shoulder as a lane. Traffic was backed up all the way from the light at Slaughter, well past the one at Monarch. She was going at least 50+. Up ahead was the light at Monarch and I saw a northbound SUV about to make a  left turn at the light, from Manchaca onto Monarch. Right then I told my boy there's about to be a wreck. She never hit her brakes or slowed at all as she approached the light on the shoulder. The SUV turned, & she t-boned him in the right side, sent him airborne, and into the front end of a pickup that was waiting at his red light on Monarch. BIG hit. Thankfully nobody was hurt too bad. Crazy bitch was totally clueless, oblivious to the fact she had even done even the slightest thing wrong. I was happy to be a witness for the pickup & suv drivers. Got calls from their insurance reps & both said the chick's insurance was trying to claim 50/50 responsibility, but with my statement, they had her dead to rights. 

Edited by wood
  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Driving into downtown from south Congress in the morning, people who drive all the way up to where the traffic is stopped in the left lane and then try to jam their way into the middle lane. Worst if traffic starts to move and they are still holding up the two lanes trying to get over. The left lane backs up with people waiting to turn left onto Cesar Chavez. But of course you know that since you drive this every morning just like everyone else trying to get across the bridge at this time of day.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The cocksuckers in my neighborhood who slow to 5 mph to go over those big rubber speed humps.  Fuck off with that.  I have kids that play outside too and I don't speed on residential streets but those humps are made to go over at the speed limit.  Going over them slow is a fucking beating of a rollercoaster.  Going over them at 25-30mph lets your suspension absorb the bump and is much smoother.   

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, Chuychanga said:

The cocksuckers in my neighborhood who slow to 5 mph to go over those big rubber speed humps.  Fuck off with that.  I have kids that play outside too and I don't speed on residential streets but those humps are made to go over at the speed limit.  Going over them slow is a fucking beating of a rollercoaster.  Going over them at 25-30mph lets your suspension absorb the bump and is much smoother.   

I hear ya. I've seen the faster bumps like you're talking about, but there are a lot around town (probably not in your hood) that are definitely not made for the speed limit, but more like half the limit or even less. That's a big beef I've had with those bumps since they started installing 'em - that there are a lot of them you can't take at the speed limit without launching all your shit all over your car & bottoming out your suspension. It's bullshit to give me a 10 mph speed bump in a 30 mph zone.

Edited by wood
Link to comment
Share on other sites

People who can't use turn lanes correctly.

Since TxDot went on a turn lane fetish, RR 12 is a 3-lane road nearly all the way from RM 32 to San Marcos.  There are turn lanes where there's not even places to turn.  

Yet every fucking day, I get behind someone who slows way down, then puts on their left turn signal and gets in the turn lane 50 feet from where they're going to turn.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On ‎4‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 1:09 AM, Papa Johnny Road said:

I can’t stand dickheads that use the shoulder of the road or emergency lane to pass slow/stopped traffic on the way to work. Then they flip the bird when I dont let them back onto the highway when that lane ends. 

Like, when they're *NOT* turning right at the next intersection?  

If so, that's fucked up.  

Damn, wood's story...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's not necessarily the most selfish, but there is an epidemic of people in the this country who can not make an authoritative right turn into a business or on a green light. You don't need to come to a near halt in flowing traffic to turn into the McDonalds.  If pedestrians are clearly not present, you can signal, break smoothly and turn right without causing the traffic behind you to come to a complete stop.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Bateshorn said:

It's not necessarily the most selfish, but there is an epidemic of people in the this country who can not make an authoritative right turn into a business or on a green light. You don't need to come to a near halt in flowing traffic to turn into the McDonalds.  If pedestrians are clearly not present, you can signal, break smoothly and turn right without causing the traffic behind you to come to a complete stop.

This is also a big one for me. Oddly enough, a car can make a turn without coming to a complete stop on a major roadway.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Something I’m noticing more often is drivers just assuming that they have the right away when entering roadways from parking lots and etc. For these drivers it’s obvious that the flowing traffic is obligated to yield heavily on the breaks. They usually don’t even bother to look at oncoming traffic as they exit the parking lot without ever stopping since they left their parking space.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

47 minutes ago, Message Board User said:

People who speed up as you try to pass them should be set on fire.

This is the weirdest, most baffling shit, and I see it every time I get in my car. Some more subtle, & some just blatantly obvious, like the fucker in the right lane on sb Mopac the other day who decided that, for whatever reason, he just didn't want me passing him in the middle lane. Dude was just cruising about 65 by himself in the right lane as I approached in the middle lane going about 80. As soon as I got near him though, dude damn near wrecked himself trying to stay ahead of me or keep up. Changing lanes all over the place, cutting people off, etc. Fucking bizarre shit.

Then you have the left lane blockers who'll speed up just a tad when they see you behind them, but won't move over even when they have plenty of room. They'll do anything but move the fuck over. Gotta have that left lane.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, wood said:

This is the weirdest, most baffling shit, and I see it every time I get in my car. Some more subtle, & some just blatantly obvious, like the fucker in the right lane on sb Mopac the other day who decided that, for whatever reason, he just didn't want me passing him in the middle lane. Dude was just cruising about 65 by himself in the right lane as I approached in the middle lane going about 80. As soon as I got near him though, dude damn near wrecked himself trying to stay ahead of me or keep up. Changing lanes all over the place, cutting people off, etc. Fucking bizarre shit.

Then you have the left lane blockers who'll speed up just a tad when they see you behind them, but won't move over even when they have plenty of room. They'll do anything but move the fuck over. Gotta have that left lane.

I think he wanted your number.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, South Austin said:

People who drive the wrong way in a parking lot should choke on a bag of dicks.

This is another one.  Far east aisle at the HEB on Bunker Hill.  Every-friggin'-time there is some dipshit that does that crap.  Every. Time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Message Board User said:

People who speed up as you try to pass them should be set on fire.

That is standard operating procedure out here, along with speeding up when you throw on your blinker to pinch you getting over.  It's gotten to the point I won't use my blinker in traffic.  Don't want to let anyone know my intentions until it's too late.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/7/2018 at 12:43 AM, The Tower said:

hate drivers who i let cut through traffic and needed to get through and don't give a courtesy wave.

The case of when a driver wants to "let" you cut across lanes (while your view is obstructed) to merge into oncoming traffic, only for them to wave you like " hurry & go"...

In that moment I think, "I'd would rather be the safe asshole than the obedient one that gets t-boned while the obstructing vehicle goes on as if they didn't initiate the wreck"...

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Message Board User said:

People who speed up as you try to pass them should be set on fire.

Was driving on 183 yesterday between Cuero-Gonzales-Luling and this kept happening. People cruising steady at 65 in the one-lane or no-passing sections and speed up to 80 in the passing zones. What the fuck is wrong with them. Pick a goddamn steady speed and stick with it.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/6/2018 at 10:09 PM, Steel Shank said:

I did this yesterday (stopping). First time through there with the new change. Won't do it again. I promise. Just wanted to be honest and fess up.

Same.  Although they marked it as a yield, which I really don't understand.  There's no one to yield to if you have your own lane, right?

On a related note- turning right onto Southwest Parkway from the southbound mopac feeder.  No yield sign there, but people stop all the time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/6/2018 at 7:58 AM, South Austin said:

My MoPac pet peeve is dweebs trying to immediately merge onto the highway from an entrance lane, causing even more traffic congestion behind them, instead of driving further ahead on the entrance lane closer to the merge point.  Learn how to zipper merge you fucksticks.

In fairness, there is also a contingent of  Austin drivers who will try to block you from merging if you don't merge early.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, kopp0e said:

The case of when a driver wants to "let" you cut across lanes (while your view is obstructed) to merge into oncoming traffic, only for them to wave you like " hurry & go"...

In that moment I think, "I'd would rather be the safe asshole than the obedient one that gets t-boned while the obstructing vehicle goes on as if they didn't initiate the wreck"...

Yeah, I've seen this happen a few times. When these people try to wave me out into the unknown, I just wave them on, so they'll gtfo of my way quicker.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, G-RICE said:

Same.  Although they marked it as a yield, which I really don't understand.  There's no one to yield to if you have your own lane, right?

On a related note- turning right onto Southwest Parkway from the southbound mopac feeder.  No yield sign there, but people stop all the time.

Yeah I just came through there and was about to do an update...

- You're right, it's incorrectly marked as a yield when it shouldn't be. See this shit all the time. It has a yield sign and a 'yield to pedestrians' sign practically on top of one another. As if they need a sign to tell people to yield to peds. Peds always have the ROW. Unreal.  All they need there now is the stop sign that they already have for the left turn lane, and just put a little arrow on it pointing to the left lane. Then nothing at all on the right lane. 

- Easily 2/3 of the cars are stopping now. And then when they do make the turn it doesn't get much better, as they creep along about 10-15 mph.

 

What in the actual fuck? There are easily 3x as many people stopping there now than there were when there was a got damn stop sign there.  I was all happy when I saw we were finally gonna have a dedicated lane to turn on, because it makes so much sense. But nooooooooooooooo. Fucking people could fuck up a wet dream.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

16 hours ago, kopp0e said:

The case of when a driver wants to "let" you cut across lanes (while your view is obstructed) to merge into oncoming traffic, only for them to wave you like " hurry & go"...

In that moment I think, "I'd would rather be the safe asshole than the obedient one that gets t-boned while the obstructing vehicle goes on as if they didn't initiate the wreck"...

They should never have "let" you in. Worse yet if they held up cars behind them while trying to be nice to one driver. 

Maybe I'm misinterpreting your scenario. However it's also true that nobody is trying to kill you by luring you into a car wreck after they let you cut across their lane. They can see if there is oncoming traffic. If they motion that it's clear, trust them. If you're too cautious for that then you should wave off any offers to let you cut across and wait until there's no traffic in your way. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

26 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

They should never have "let" you in. Worse yet if they held up cars behind them while trying to be nice to one driver. 

Maybe I'm misinterpreting your scenario. However it's also true that nobody is trying to kill you by luring you into a car wreck after they let you cut across their lane. They can see if there is oncoming traffic. If they motion that it's clear, trust them. If you're too cautious for that then you should wave off any offers to let you cut across and wait until there's no traffic in your way. 

I understand your point and feel that most citizens would do just as you state... And that I should trust the fellow driver as competent and aware enough to gauge the speed of oncoming traffic...

But as my great aunt says "Self preservation is the 1st rule of common sense", I will stick with being patient if I can't also clearly see that traffic isn't an issue in having a traffic accident...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

46 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

They should never have "let" you in. Worse yet if they held up cars behind them while trying to be nice to one driver. 

This is one of my biggest pet peeves.  Being nice to let a person cross two lanes of traffic is being an asshole to the 100 other drivers behind you.  Because you let one person cross while traffic should be flowing you just had a bunch of cars not pass through a light 15 yds back and traffic starts to back up.  I'm now furious just thinking about it.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

That is standard operating procedure out here, along with speeding up when you throw on your blinker to pinch you getting over.  It's gotten to the point I won't use my blinker in traffic.  Don't want to let anyone know my intentions until it's too late.


Same in Houston during my ten years there. Using turn signals will invariably cause drivers to close the gap on you. I pretty much quit using them unless merging in front of commercial trucks and etc. Unfortunately Austin has become almost just as bad.
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, 1978horn said:

This is one of my biggest pet peeves.  Being nice to let a person cross two lanes of traffic is being an asshole to the 100 other drivers behind you.  Because you let one person cross while traffic should be flowing you just had a bunch of cars not pass through a light 15 yds back and traffic starts to back up.  I'm now furious just thinking about it.

Four lane road, rush hour, light is green and some douchebag in the right lane decides to be a hero and let some driver who wants to turn left out of the parking lot. That driver pulls out into the right lane, blocking all of the traffic behind our hero, while waiting for someone in the left lane to yield their right of way. The drivers in the left lane aren't idiots and keep on driving. Eventually the light turns red, traffic backs up to the parking lot entrance and someone in the left lane lets the driver out. Exactly as it would've happened if everyone had just done what they're supposed to do. Don't yield your right of way when you have it. Instead some would be Good Samaritan held up a bunch of people for no good reason. 

I've seen that play out more than once and at the same location. It's maddening. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I see that all of the time. 

We have traffic rules for a reason.  The traffic rules are supposed to make traffic flow the most efficiently.

And then you see someone ignoring those rules and trying to nice by waving someone in, and it ends up clogging traffic.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Four lane road, rush hour, light is green and some douchebag in the right lane decides to be a hero and let some driver who wants to turn left out of the parking lot. That driver pulls out into the right lane, blocking all of the traffic behind our hero, while waiting for someone in the left lane to yield their right of way. The drivers in the left lane aren't idiots and keep on driving. Eventually the light turns red, traffic backs up to the parking lot entrance and someone in the left lane lets the driver out. Exactly as it would've happened if everyone had just done what they're supposed to do. Don't yield your right of way when you have it. Instead some would be Good Samaritan held up a bunch of people for no good reason. 

I've seen that play out more than once and at the same location. It's maddening. 

HEB on Brodie at William Cannon is horrible like that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

20 hours ago, deadshank said:

This is another one.  Far east aisle at the HEB on Bunker Hill.  Every-friggin'-time there is some dipshit that does that crap.  Every. Time.

that entire parking lot is a ginormous clusterfuck.  you shouldn't be allowed to exit at that traffic light on bunker hill, make it an exit only.  have the lane in front of the HEB run west only.  have the parking lot striped so that drivers come from the north only.  that eastern aisle you're talking about should be the one that gets you from the back of the lot to the front of the lot.  whole lot should just be a big counterclockwise circulating mass

 

mspaint:

firefox_2018_04_10_12_41_20.jpg

Edited by elfenix
Link to comment
Share on other sites

20 minutes ago, elfenix said:

that entire parking lot is a ginormous clusterfuck.  you shouldn't be allowed to exit at that traffic light on bunker hill, make it an exit only.  have the lane in front of the HEB run west only.  have the parking lot striped so that drivers come from the north only.  that eastern aisle you're talking about should be the one that gets you from the back of the lot to the front of the lot.  whole lot should just be a big counterclockwise circulating mass

 

mspaint:

firefox_2018_04_10_12_41_20.jpg

MSpaint and no dicks?  Negged

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/9/2018 at 4:25 PM, Sbbruin said:

That is standard operating procedure out here, along with speeding up when you throw on your blinker to pinch you getting over.  It's gotten to the point I won't use my blinker in traffic.  Don't want to let anyone know my intentions until it's too late.

That's from Feral Mexicans from down in Feral Mexico. Down there, a turn signal means "It's clear for you to pass me on this side." SweaterGod. And the cop cars blink their lights all the time, doesn't mean to pull over.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/7/2018 at 12:42 AM, Larry T. Spider said:

I generally drive 5-10 over and not in the left lane unless passing. I’m getting tailgated daily now. It’s to the point that I don’t even give a shit anymore. If they want to ride 2 feet from my bumper then that’s their deal.

Handicapped drivers are the worst tailgaters. Hey motherfucker, just because you got crippled, doesn't mean I want to join you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Jebus fucking shit...

I just exited SB at Davis and at least 80% of the cars turning right are coming to a complete fucking stop. They've removed the yield sign, which was the right thing to do since people turning right now have their own lane, but apparently it's all just way too mind-boggling for the typical Austin driver to wrap their little heads around. 

So ... to speed traffic up through there, they remove the stop sign and make it a right turn with a dedicated lane, and it's slower now than it ever was with the stop sign ... because people are fucking morons. FML.

Edited by wood
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 4/6/2018 at 3:07 PM, pearlandhorn said:

People on a freeway that use an exit only lane to pass cars and immediately get back in a non-exit only lane. 

Eyes buried deep in their cell phone while driving or stopped at a red light. 

Women applying makeup while driving.  Get up 10 30 fucking minutes earlier.

fixy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't see the problem here.  That's just maximizing the use of the road.  If I'm entering the freeway and that entry lane is eventually an exit only lane why does it matter to you if I merge immediately or further down the road?
 


Only a problem with me if you create a traffic backup in the exit lane trying to merge back in.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Jebus fucking shit...
I just exited SB at Davis and at least 80% of the cars turning right are coming to a complete fucking stop. They've removed the yield sign, which was the right thing to do since people turning right now have their own lane, but apparently it's all just way too mind-boggling for the typical Austin driver to wrap their little heads around. 
So ... to speed traffic up through there, they remove the stop sign and make it a right turn with a dedicated lane, and it's slower now than it ever was with the stop sign ... because people are fucking morons. FML.


It was one of the smarter little things I’ve ever seen the city do to improve traffic and people are too stupid for it to help.

If they would also just widen that exit a smidge and add a second left turn lane it’d be great.
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I’m waiting at a light in a turn lane to get onto I10. It’s rush hour and I’ve had to wait two light sequences to get close enough to make the next light. An 18 wheeler pulls up in the lane next to me(not a turn lane) and when the light turns green makes a left hand turn cutting off everyone in the turn lane just so he didn’t have to wait like everyone else. I wanted to pull his ass out of his truck and light him on fire. What a fucking asshole.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



×
×
  • Create New...