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Vasectomy


Biff Tannen

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3 hours ago, hornfan785 said:

Hopefully I don't have that problem. Haven't shot one off yet...

 

Hope you don't either.

 

3 hours ago, Pig Bellmont said:


Maybe start looking into malpractice attorneys. 

 

Eh, it was almost 10 years ago.  And his primary job seems to have worked, since I've not produced any kids since.

 

3 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Might be from that time you had unprotected sex in Haiti and not from the vasectomy 

 

Never been.  But maybe it was from my trip to Thailand.

 

3 hours ago, AUS-97HORN said:

fuck man Ive never even heard of anything like that...

I look 3 days off after the boys were snipped and then had a very enthusiastic lady with a oral fetish clean out my live rounds for the next month.   was declared clear of live rounds 4 weeks to the day i got snipped. 

 

Oh, I heard about it before the procedure....

 

2 hours ago, tokamak said:

My doc warned me about this. The number he gave was high enough to definitely give me pause. Maybe 1 in 10 or something like that. 
 

At the time he mentioned something about being able to deaden the nerves if it happens. Can’t remember the details but you could ask about it. 

 

.....from the doc who did it (UT Houston Health grad).  He said it was a slight chance, and it would be uncomfortable if it did occur, and if it did happen it would subside sometime after the first year.  He was right.  He told me to come back if it was too much for me, or kept happening in Year 3 or whatever, but I never followed up other than to take in the samples at 30 and 60 days to get the all clear signal.

Closest comparison would be getting racked, but the pain would pass in 15 seconds or so.   And it was random when it occured.

 

 

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  • 1 month later...
44 minutes ago, After irth said:

Initial consultation with Dr. Kwatra at Spring Creek Urology in Conroe tomorrow morn. Never even had a pregnancy scare before, so maybe I don’t need one. I’m sure jerking off in a cup will be fun, though.  

The jerking off into the cup is fine.  The ride up with it in the elevator and the handing it to the young receptionist to give to the lab is, uh, the icing on the cake.

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2 minutes ago, Anastasis said:

That shit is done with home test.  You are getting screwed if they make you come back into the office. It's like solving a riddle to figure out the home test protocol, but you can get the sig other to help out. 

Good to know, especially since I live 90 miles from the doctor. 

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8 minutes ago, Anastasis said:

That shit is done with home test.  You are getting screwed if they make you come back into the office. It's like solving a riddle to figure out the home test protocol, but you can get the sig other to help out. 

Yeah, like I want that much involvement with the samples.  Into the cup, drive it to the office, pass the bag.  Yeah.  Better. 

 

Flunked that test twice before the all clear too, for what it's worth.  I must have a vast deferens.

Edited by dcbc
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2 minutes ago, After irth said:

Good to know, especially since I live 90 miles from the doctor. 

This is what Dr. Kushnik Shaw at Austin Urology uses.  Shaw is the Austin King of Vasectomies, only outclassed by name in Dr. Dick Chopp. 

 

https://spermcheck.com/

 

Here is his protocol: https://austinurologyinstitute.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/12/2019-AUI-Vasectomy-Brochure.pdf

 

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26 minutes ago, After irth said:

Good to know, especially since I live 90 miles from the doctor. 

I'm assuming you need to put it on ice or something for that trip?  I know when I took in my samples, the dr told me to do it ASAP (I live about 10 minutes from his office).

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Post-procedure update for those interested:  

Highly recommend Dr. Kwatra at Spring Creek Urology in Conroe (also offices in The Woodlands and Cypress). He’s the perfect mix of straight-shooter professionalism and big-kid personality. Margo on the assist was a peach as well.  Overall, a very positive experience. 
 

I never felt a thing. My hand tat hurt a helluva lot more than this. 
 

Left with a very dull ache like I’ve been flicked in the balls. Can’t imagine I’m gonna take very many of the Tylenol 4 that he so generously provided, but I will gladly embrace a few days of being a couch potato while icing my balls. Got a few movies picked out and a new book to dig into. 
 

My doctor wife is very grateful I did this and has promised much TLC through the entire process. She took me to The Woodlands to wine and dine me on Sunday night, and then drove me back home to Lufkin yesterday evening after the snip. She already has gold stars ready for our Jizz Board to keep track of the 30 loads I need to blow before October. She’s a cheeky bitch. 
 

I think I’m gonna enjoy this. 

Edited by After irth
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I went to Dr. Hogan in the Woodlands last Monday and it was about as pleasant as it could be. Only two mild pinch sensations on the lidocaine, and I was bullshitting with him the entire procedure about the most fucked up things we’d seen doctors do (urology for him, spine for me). He did it solo without an awkward lady in the room holding up my junk.
 

I was diligent with the frozen peas for 48 hours, then went shooting on a sporting clays course on Thursday without issue. Never experienced swelling or bruising. One week out, I still get the occasional sore feeling like being thumped in the balls. His sperm test is after 90 days, you drop off your cup sample at any Quest. I told my wife the doctor encouraged 90 ejaculations in 90 days and she seems to have bought it. 

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3 hours ago, Murfdogg21 said:

He did it solo without an awkward lady in the room holding up my junk.
 

 

I had a rowdy 40-year old assistant in the room, but it wasn’t awkward at all. She was hilarious. I’m also not really shy, either. 
 

“Now, Honey, I’m just gonna gently tape your penis to your belly so it’s not in the way, ok?”

”Whatever you need to do…”

It was a goofy and surreal experience. 

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I had an assistant paint my nether regions down with betadyne or whatever before the doc got started.  I'm not shy, but it was a bit cold.  Then, my wife, came in to wish me well.  The doc came in at the same time and greetings were exchanged.  Then, my wife, instead of leaving for the waiting room, just sat down in a chair in the corner and watched.  It was kind of strange I guess, but I'd been given Valium earlier and that was the least of my worries.

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I asked the doc if “scalpel-free” was just marketing bullshit, and he said it was. Then he holds up the scalpel to show me he’d already used it. He explained the obvious, that using some kind of blunt forceps to puncture or stretch a hole open in your sack, you risk a lot of collateral damage and it would be more painful anyway. He did acknowledge that most urologists older than 50 or 55 use the old school method of a large incision, while more recently trained guys make a tiny nick in the sack just large enough to fish out the vas deferens and cut them. I didn’t even need a bandaid, let alone stitches; just applied pressure with gauze for a couple hours simultaneously with frozen pea bag. 

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Mine gave me stitches which was a little annoying to deal with for about a week, as they'd sometimes rub against the tightie whities they told me to wear for support, but it wasn't a big deal. They dissolved off after a week and a half or so.

Almost 2 months since my snip and it's pretty much back to normal. Every once in a while I'll cross my legs a certain way or I'll be in bed and roll in my side and I'll feel a pain where the incision was. I've narrowed it down to the spot where the small dot of a scar is. Anyone else have a similar issue? I've had one "all clear" sperm test but I have to give another one after 10 more loads just to be safe. I might bring up the small point of pain if it's still occurring with the doc at that point.

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I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?

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53 minutes ago, Dutchrudder said:

I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?

I had,my,wife drive because, well, that’s her part of the deal.

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6 hours ago, Dutchrudder said:

I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?

I couldn’t drive because the procedure was so short I was still loopy from the one Valium I took before the surgery. Maybe you can forgo the Valium, but before anybody puts a sharp object near my sack I need something to chill the fuck out.

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I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?
Drove myself there and back with zero issues. I didn't need any pain pills though. Maybe some procedures are worse than others.
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6 hours ago, Dutchrudder said:

I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?

If you take any sedation beforehand, they won't let you drive home or Uber. You will need a friend or family drive you. 

I skipped the sedation, drove myself to and from the event. The local anesthetic will still be working and you won't need pain pills for the drive home. I think I took a couple of Advil the 1st day or two, bags of ice and hung out watching TV for the rest of the afternoon and the following day. Back to work on Monday. 

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10 hours ago, Dutchrudder said:

I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?

My drive home was about 45 mins. The last few minutes were getting rougher and rougher as I got closer. I was in a 3/4 ton that’s never been accused of having a good ride, though. Any good riding car and I bet you’d be fine. 

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Did mine a few years ago on the second weekend of CFB and opening NFL weekend. On the couch watching football all weekend while being attended to by the wife. Better believe I played up the pain. In reality it’s was not bad at all.

You guys getting it done during the off season are doing it wrong.

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On 7/19/2022 at 11:07 PM, Dutchrudder said:

I'm scheduled for next Wednesday. I figure it's a good thing to get done before Texas makes it illegal or whatever.  They said I should get someone to drive me home, get an Uber, or go without the pain pills immediately until I get home. Did anyone drive themselves to and from the procedure or is that just crazy?

Hope it went well for you. I don’t know what all this talk is of anesthesia, Valium, or pain meds. I got local lidocaine in my sack and that was it. Doc wouldn’t prescribe pain meds (which most good and ethical docs these days are rightfully stingy with it). I drove myself there, drove home 10 minutes after it was home. Tylenol every 4 hours, and constantly rotated three bags of frozen peas between my nuts and back in the freezer for two days. Never had swelling or bruising. I am two weeks out, and there is still a little soreness on the boys when pressure is applied, almost like someone flicked your testicle. 

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1 hour ago, Murfdogg21 said:

Hope it went well for you. I don’t know what all this talk is of anesthesia, Valium, or pain meds. I got local lidocaine in my sack and that was it. Doc wouldn’t prescribe pain meds (which most good and ethical docs these days are rightfully stingy with it). I drove myself there, drove home 10 minutes after it was home. Tylenol every 4 hours, and constantly rotated three bags of frozen peas between my nuts and back in the freezer for two days. Never had swelling or bruising. I am two weeks out, and there is still a little soreness on the boys when pressure is applied, almost like someone flicked your testicle. 

Day 10 here. First day that I didn’t think about my balls at all, so I guess I’m back to normal. 

I probably didn’t need them, but I took a few of the pain pills during the first few days of icing. Kept me nice and mellow. Will save the rest for when I do something stupid and pull something or whatever. 

Wife lubed it up and helped me shoot off my first load today. It was glorious.  29 more to go before October. Shouldn’t be a problem.  

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14 hours ago, Murfdogg21 said:

Hope it went well for you. I don’t know what all this talk is of anesthesia, Valium, or pain meds. I got local lidocaine in my sack and that was it. Doc wouldn’t prescribe pain meds (which most good and ethical docs these days are rightfully stingy with it). I drove myself there, drove home 10 minutes after it was home. Tylenol every 4 hours, and constantly rotated three bags of frozen peas between my nuts and back in the freezer for two days. Never had swelling or bruising. I am two weeks out, and there is still a little soreness on the boys when pressure is applied, almost like someone flicked your testicle. 

I didn't get pain meds, but I was glad for the Valium a few hours beforehand.

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I got the procedure done Wednesday morning, was super quick and easy. I was in and out in under an hour, and 20 minutes of that was paperwork, 10 minutes was waiting post-op. It was kind of uncomfortable, like dental work, but nothing bad. The doc cut out about a 1 inch section of each vas, and then proceeded to show me the tube. He even offered for me to hold them, but I declined cause that's just gross.  

Recovery so far has been fine. First few hours were a dull ache for the most part, but the ice helped a lot. I took regular Tylenol 3-4 times a day, but nothing major.  It's not so bad, should be back to normal in a couple days. 

The most disappointing part of this whole thing is that my wife was going to get me a cookie cake with a pair of scissors on it that said "SNIP SNIP HOORAY" but those pious losers at the "great" American Cookie Company wouldn't make it due to it being a "lewd" design. She even told them it was for a vasectomy and not an abortion or something awful. Bunch of prudes. 

 

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  • 2 months later...

Had mine done 2 weeks ago.  Procedure was quick, total time in the office was <45 minutes, total time doc actually working on me was <10 min.  I used Shaw partially based on the recommendations in this thread.  Good experience although midway through he made a joke about making a mistake that I did not appreciate at the time.  I would compare the procedure to having a tooth pulled, pain wise.  Basically felt like 5 minutes of somebody thumping your nutsack hard.  Never would have rated the pain higher than 4/10.

The finality of the baby making phase of my life being over hit me during the procedure and that affected me more than I expected.

I took celebrex and iced my balls the first 2 days and pain was minimal.  I didn’t wear a jock strap the first week after and in hindsight I wish I would have.  I didn’t have sex for a week and thought I took it pretty easy overall, but a week after surgery my balls swelled and righty developed a lump.  Not all that painful but certainly uncomfortable and disconcerting.  The googles tell me it’s either a sperm granuloma (can last days or up to years) or hematoma (usually lasts a couple weeks).  Called the office and they told me to give it a week and come in if it doesn’t go away or if it gets worse.  I’ve had sex several times this past week and nothing different of note other than minor discomfort that I expect to go away completely over the next couple weeks. 
 

All in all I wished I’d pushed back on my wife and tried harder to convince her to get back on the pill, but I’m sure once this lump resides and everything goes back to normal that I will have no ragrats.

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So I went to Midtown Urology based on reviews and those who recommended Trotter. Well, he was booked up, so they gave me the other doctor in the office. No big deal.

Procedure went fine. On a whim, I looked up my doctor's bio the day after. Bachelors from Johns Hopkins. Medical degree from NYU. Residency at Harvard... and in his spare time, he got an MBA from Harvard for good measure. 

Seems like he should be solving world hunger or peace in the Middle East, but he seemed to do a hell of a job.

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I'm having two hernias repaired on Thursday and asked the surgeon during my consult if he could give me a snip at the same time he's in there for the hernias.  He said it's no problem and is actually less intrusive to go in through the top rather than the bottom since he's already making incisions there.  So I'll be knocked out for this one but plan to be pretty f'n sore for a while afterwards. 

 

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Phew, surgery was last Thursday and today was the first day I could get out of bed without significant pain.  It's not the vasectomy at all though, but rather the two large incisions on my lower abdomen made to repair the hernias.  I've been up and moving around some the last 2 days, but doing anything that engaged ab muscles hurts like a bastard.  When I do move around I do it very slowly but yesterday I took one step too quickly down a little stair and felt something pull - thought I was going to pass out for a second.

Fuck surgery.

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  • 3 months later...
On 10/11/2022 at 9:13 AM, FirstTimeCaller said:

So I went to Midtown Urology based on reviews and those who recommended Trotter. Well, he was booked up, so they gave me the other doctor in the office. No big deal.

Procedure went fine. On a whim, I looked up my doctor's bio the day after. Bachelors from Johns Hopkins. Medical degree from NYU. Residency at Harvard... and in his spare time, he got an MBA from Harvard for good measure. 

Seems like he should be solving world hunger or peace in the Middle East, but he seemed to do a hell of a job.

Following up as I think it's important that people know it doesn't always go perfectly. My procedure went fine at the time, but there have been some complications that ain't fun.

1) First two tests came back positive at 30 days and 60 days. I just got my first negative four months after the procedure and still have to provide another.

2) About 6 weeks after the procedure, there was blood where there wasn't supposed to be. Eventually had to go back to doing the procedure of right after the surgery where I took it extremely easy for 7-10 days. Took about three weeks for it to completely clear. Haven't had that issue for about a month or more so hopefully that won't be an issue.

3) Just got back from an ultrasound as I'm having pain/discomfort on one side four months out. It's not bad, but not pleasant. Meet with the doc next week to go over the results.

4) I also got a random bill in the mail that I wasn't supposed to get from the lab they use that's been impossible to clear up. Austin Midtown is supposed to be handling it, but it's not fun getting surprise bills and then having to spend my time and effort fighting about it.

So after more than four months I paid $1K, have had blood, pain/discomfort, and just days ago finally got my first negative test. Honestly, at this point I regret doing it. And before you ask, I've done everything by the book for the healing process. 

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  • 1 month later...
On 3/19/2021 at 7:41 AM, BradInATX said:

Shout out to Dr. Dickinson at Austin Urology in Buda. Got mine done yesterday. In and out in 20 minutes. Talked about March Madness the whole time. Woke up this morning expecting pain and I have zero. Feels like I could go play 18 if I wanted to. Bonus that his assistant is pretty hot.

Finally getting back around to scheduling this; called Austin Urology, made an appt. with Dr. Dickinson, but right before I hung up, I asked "this is the minimal, no scalpel procedure, right?"

"No, Dr. Dickinson doesn't do those. You'd need to go to a different doctor for that".

Glad I asked. Got an appt. with Dr. Floyd now, who supposedly does the newer procedure.

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I was referred to Austin Urology about 8 or 9 years ago for a prostate check. Dr. Denson did the digital exam, followed by an extra close & extensive fondling examination of my junk. Unfortunately Nurse Kratchit was also in the room. 
But I still enjoyed it.

 

Just now, Armybrat said:


 

DAD9D127-41E7-4BA6-9667-A3626FD4A2ED.jpeg

Edited by Armybrat
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Following up as I think it's important that people know it doesn't always go perfectly. My procedure went fine at the time, but there have been some complications that ain't fun.
1) First two tests came back positive at 30 days and 60 days. I just got my first negative four months after the procedure and still have to provide another.
2) About 6 weeks after the procedure, there was blood where there wasn't supposed to be. Eventually had to go back to doing the procedure of right after the surgery where I took it extremely easy for 7-10 days. Took about three weeks for it to completely clear. Haven't had that issue for about a month or more so hopefully that won't be an issue.
3) Just got back from an ultrasound as I'm having pain/discomfort on one side four months out. It's not bad, but not pleasant. Meet with the doc next week to go over the results.
4) I also got a random bill in the mail that I wasn't supposed to get from the lab they use that's been impossible to clear up. Austin Midtown is supposed to be handling it, but it's not fun getting surprise bills and then having to spend my time and effort fighting about it.
So after more than four months I paid $1K, have had blood, pain/discomfort, and just days ago finally got my first negative test. Honestly, at this point I regret doing it. And before you ask, I've done everything by the book for the healing process. 

Sounds like you should have gone to a doctor that did something other than study.
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Follow up on my follow up...

All seems good now. It took about six months, but discomfort is all gone, and I got my two negative tests as of about a month ago. 

So it was rough getting here, but it's nice to be done with it. I guess the true test will be if there is a little "surprise" in the next few months.

 

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...
On 3/15/2023 at 12:59 PM, rage-a-holic said:

Finally getting back around to scheduling this; called Austin Urology, made an appt. with Dr. Dickinson, but right before I hung up, I asked "this is the minimal, no scalpel procedure, right?"

"No, Dr. Dickinson doesn't do those. You'd need to go to a different doctor for that".

Glad I asked. Got an appt. with Dr. Floyd now, who supposedly does the newer procedure.

Well Fuck. Got the 15 minute spiel from Dr. Floyd, "any questions?" then he wanted to check my nuts. For WAY too long.

"Well, bad news, you're not gonna want to hear this....."

Oh fuck, I have cancer....

"One of your vas deferens is a bit high, it's hard to reach, so we can't do the quick procedure, we need to book the medical center, anesthesiologist, etc."

Uh, that's gonna cost a lot more, right?

"Probably, I don't know for sure, my nurse can check"

Nurse calls later that day, doesn't know a ballpark price and doesn't seem interested in even checking for me. Fuck that.

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