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Cairn Horn88

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32 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Got my wife one of those...to go with the portable CD player I got her as one of our first "serious gifts" when we were dating.  Did I bundle it with an Enya CD, because chicks dig Enya?  Damn right I did.  Setting the MOOD, mofos.

Back in the day, it was Bread.   Brian Eno probably kept me from getting laid multiple times.

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35 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Got my wife one of those...to go with the portable CD player I got her as one of our first "serious gifts" when we were dating.  Did I bundle it with an Enya CD, because chicks dig Enya?  Damn right I did.  Setting the MOOD, mofos.

Pairing a date/gift with some Enya is a seasoned veteran move.  God bless that Irish lass.  

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41 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Got my wife one of those...to go with the portable CD player I got her as one of our first "serious gifts" when we were dating.  Did I bundle it with an Enya CD, because chicks dig Enya?  Damn right I did.  Setting the MOOD, mofos.

Brisket made a baby to “Only Time”?

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Who the hell were you guys you thought you could score to Brian Eno or Bread or Enya?  

According to the 5-point plan of Trans-Am pussy getting, it's Side 2 of Led Zeppelin IV or go home with blue balls.  Everybody knows that

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1 hour ago, Brisketexan said:

Got my wife one of those...to go with the portable CD player I got her as one of our first "serious gifts" when we were dating.  Did I bundle it with an Enya CD, because chicks dig Enya?  Damn right I did.  Setting the MOOD, mofos.

Nothing better to get the ol' Orinoco flowing circa 1988

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Jeez, y'all are a bunch of amateurs.  Marvin Gaye was the runaway #1, then Barry White, maybe a little James Taylor, possibly some Zep for the more adventurous gals, or even Pink Floyd.

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19 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Jeez, y'all are a bunch of amateurs.  Marvin Gaye was the runaway #1, then Barry White, maybe a little James Taylor, possibly some Zep for the more adventurous gals, or even Pink Floyd.

sorry you're old

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18 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Jeez, y'all are a bunch of amateurs.  Marvin Gaye was the runaway #1, then Barry White, maybe a little James Taylor, possibly some Zep for the more adventurous gals, or even Pink Floyd.

I didn't talk to my dad much in high school.  but when we did talk, it was always science, baseball, or music.  To his credit, he turned me to a lotta great stuff from the 50's and 60's that I still listen to today.  He gave me a Johnny Mathis tape and told me to play it after this dance (homecoming or junior prom or whatever).  I remember saying, "she's not gonna know who the heck this guy is, I barely know."  And he said, "That's what'll make it work so well."  And sure enough, Kelly G. got down to clown to the silky sounds of Johnny Mathis.  To this day, Sam Cooke still works when my wife and I have some time alone. 

Little did I know, while I was worried about what kinda music could get them to arch their back...............a man was grabbing 'em by the pussy on his way to the White House.  

Not even Wayne Newton pulled that creepy shit.  

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1 hour ago, YGIFS said:

Who the hell were you guys you thought you could score to Brian Eno or Bread or Enya?  

According to the 5-point plan of Trans-Am pussy getting, it's Side 2 of Led Zeppelin IV or go home with blue balls.  Everybody knows that

Tell me you were a virgin until you went to college without telling me. 

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56 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Jeez, y'all are a bunch of amateurs.  Marvin Gaye was the runaway #1, then Barry White, maybe a little James Taylor, possibly some Zep for the more adventurous gals, or even Pink Floyd.

"And five, now this is the most important, Rat. When it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV."

 

 

Oh, and pardon the change in subject, but yesterday's transcript is up.

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image.png.319e27c08f28345345c79c854c20139e.png

 

good lord... this might be the second-dumbest thing I've ever read

Yes, if you take a small number, and multiply it by a much larger number, you get a large number. Wow. Such a brilliant businessman, Trump is.

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The great thing about the transcript is you get to read what's actually going on in the sidebars with the judge. Reporters can't hear that, but it goes into the official record.

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4 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

image.png.319e27c08f28345345c79c854c20139e.png

 

good lord... this might be the second-dumbest thing I've ever read

Yes, if you take a small number, and multiply it by a much larger number, you get a large number. Wow. Such a brilliant businessman, Trump is.

 

no math.gif

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17 minutes ago, DDD Dad said:

Tell me you were a virgin until you went to college without telling me. 

Funny you should mention that.  I think about the women I've known over the years.  I had zero game in high school and even into college because I was raised in a household of 4 women after dad left for half my life and was always the "nice guy" (I guess friend zone would be the term now).  In College, I did okay.  Finally got some actual "game" in grad school.  Met my now wife, and then made a few bucks and of course as is usually the case between being "taken" and having an aura of success and a sense of humor, pussy just starts throwing itself at you.  No humblebrag, I've lived many lives and served many masters but she's been the only one for me for 20+ years.  But it brings up an interesting point about female voters.  The ones I've known for long enough to see them go from wanting a 'bad boy' to wanting a nice church going fellow who'd make a decent father, they're willing to throw every other woman they know under the bus to support this abusive, sexist piece of shit.  And they don't see the connection. 

So many women in my extended family and my wife's, they had their wild youth and now want wholesome men to go to church with and help raise their daughters and be civic leaders and men of purpose.  Then they still with no sense of irony walk into a polling station and vote for this misogynistic assbags with a fucking smile. But I'm still the asshole because I told a bartender on the Riverwalk I was on the 2-deep for Oklahoma State for the Alamo Bowl and she believed me.  And gave me the blowjob to end all blowjobs.  

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8 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

gonna go eat dinner now before I post more "things that only Rimbo finds interesting in a transcript that @TwiceHorn assured him would be <some word I had to look up that means dull>"

Oh I am sure you'll find some tidbits but reading transcripts can be one of the dullest things known to man. 

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5 minutes ago, TwiceHorn said:

Oh I am sure you'll find some tidbits but reading transcripts can be one of the dullest things known to man. 

I know when to skip ahead and don't have to pay attention to the whole thing. I'm mining for lulz, not prepping for a case/exam. 🤣

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Oh I am sure you'll find some tidbits but reading transcripts can be one of the dullest things known to man. 

One of the first depos I wa sin on where the court reporter had tech that could 1) feed the transcript to your laptop in real-time and 2) she could send PMs to individual screens…was an awesome “transcript.” Our court reporter was a hottie with bolt ons and all the tats. And one of our co-counsel was a bona fide ladies man - just had the touch, banged someone in every town we worked in. He was married, of course.

Anyway, on one of our first breaks, he shows us his PM screen. It’s full of messages she’d send him during slow spots in the testimony. Detailed messages about all the things she was going to do to him that night. We ask “so…you gonna take her up on that?” “Nah…she’s had about a mile of dick in her.”

Great transcript.
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43 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:


One of the first depos I wa sin on where the court reporter had tech that could 1) feed the transcript to your laptop in real-time and 2) she could send PMs to individual screens…was an awesome “transcript.” Our court reporter was a hottie with bolt ons and all the tats. And one of our co-counsel was a bona fide ladies man - just had the touch, banged someone in every town we worked in. He was married, of course.

Anyway, on one of our first breaks, he shows us his PM screen. It’s full of messages she’d send him during slow spots in the testimony. Detailed messages about all the things she was going to do to him that night. We ask “so…you gonna take her up on that?” “Nah…she’s had about a mile of dick in her.”

Great transcript.

We got rules here. Pics?

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46 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:


One of the first depos I wa sin on where the court reporter had tech that could 1) feed the transcript to your laptop in real-time and 2) she could send PMs to individual screens…was an awesome “transcript.” Our court reporter was a hottie with bolt ons and all the tats. And one of our co-counsel was a bona fide ladies man - just had the touch, banged someone in every town we worked in. He was married, of course.

Anyway, on one of our first breaks, he shows us his PM screen. It’s full of messages she’d send him during slow spots in the testimony. Detailed messages about all the things she was going to do to him that night. We ask “so…you gonna take her up on that?” “Nah…she’s had about a mile of dick in her.”

What a fucking loser

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