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The Kids (Aren't) Alright - World Happiness Report


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11 minutes ago, fattyflattie said:

We’ve had the opposite experience.  I’m not in a lower income area, however the league is located in one.  Both of our closest leagues are, actually.   There is a pretty solid range of racial and income/wealth demographics.   BUT, everyone with any money bolts after 10U.   At almost a 100% rate, it’s odd.  My daughters found their preferred sports before that age but we have plenty of friends from the league and it’s been consistent. 

I still don’t see how club teams are a deterrent.  There are some that are big money, but there are “affordable” club teams, too. 

I'm talking about leagues that only pull in lower income families. The leagues with mixed demographics are not in the same boat as the ones where everyone is poor.

Regarding youth baseball, it isn't a secret that thanks to travel ball it’s become a sport for the upper-middle class. It's a big problem for the sport that the MLB has made an effort to address because they will lose future fans.

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1 minute ago, F250 said:

I'm talking about leagues that only pull in lower income families. The leagues with mixed demographics are not in the same boat as the ones where everyone is poor.

Regarding youth baseball, it isn't a secret that thanks to travel ball it’s become a sport for the upper-middle class. It's a big problem for the sport that the MLB has made an effort to address because they will lose future fans.

Yeah, there are definitely issues with the club sport, particularly the ones that go year round.  We traded rec level team sports for year round individual sports, but it still has its warts. Luckily, my kids are passionate about their respective activities, and that helps with the burnout. I don’t gaf what they are as long as they are moving and enjoying it.  Lots of $$$ and time though, oof. 

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Y'all got suggestions for video games?

Kiddo LOVES them. Hell, they are fun. I get it. But I want him to self-moderate more. I don't think I've ever seen him turn it off without being prompted. He also loves talking about it, acting it out, etc. It's his passion.

If he likes them, I want him to be able to enjoy them. But I also want him to be able to play in moderation without having the constant guardrails of mom/dad. I feel like we do a decent job at limiting his play, but he also constantly asks for them when not actively doing something else and he would rather play a video game than play with a friend or be active.

Doesn't help that school seems to like having educational games on the tablet. 

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19 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Y'all got suggestions for video games?

Kiddo LOVES them. Hell, they are fun. I get it. But I want him to self-moderate more. I don't think I've ever seen him turn it off without being prompted. He also loves talking about it, acting it out, etc. It's his passion.

If he likes them, I want him to be able to enjoy them. But I also want him to be able to play in moderation without having the constant guardrails of mom/dad. I feel like we do a decent job at limiting his play, but he also constantly asks for them when not actively doing something else and he would rather play a video game than play with a friend or be active.

Doesn't help that school seems to like having educational games on the tablet. 

What types of games?  

I took my video-game nut son who loves FP shooter games to the gun range.  He talks a big game and I just had pistols, so we rented an AR they had and turned him loose.  

"Little different, huh".  The noise, shells bouncing off the bay walls and hitting him.  Having to hold it steady.  He loved it, but also got a little perspective and now all he wants to do is go shooting.  

Wasn't planned, but it sure was effective.  I've done the same thing with scoped, bolt-guns at our place.  In the games you can hit out to XYZ yards.  Ok.  go for it.......now he knows

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50 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

100%.  Seen it too many times.  We've avoided this by keeping the kids in multiple sports that compliment one another.  The big difference are the parents that grind their kids into moon dust and kids that push themselves.  My youngest we have to reign in.  Some kids are just hyper-driven but can also get overwhelmed - which is what I'm dealing with now.  Food.  Sleep.  Practice.  School.  Time mgmt.  

My daughter is a really good athlete.  She loves gymnastics and soccer.  We have to rein her in as she would do gymnastics every day instead of once a week if we let her.  We backed her down to once a week because she kept hurting herself.  Her soccer league, Ziad, is pretty damn great in Houston.  I feel like it is plenty competitive but they don't overdo it.  There are three practices and one game per week in fall and spring.  But practices are at St John's which is right down the street and many kids only go to one or two practices per week.  They are designed where you aren't expected to attend every practice or game.

I have zero interest in her doing competitive cheer or something that requires travel.  She will be good enough to be one of the top handful of soccer players and cheerleaders at her school when she goes to high school in a couple years.

My son has gotten into wrestling.  It is just a fantastic sport for a high school boy for all sorts of reasons.  He loves it and does it year round.

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20 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

Get him a sword and tell him the bushes need trimming?

Ha. We went to Academy and he found a spear he wanted. Has multiple bows. There's a stick on the front porch that is his spear weapon.

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24 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Lulz. He's seven. He plays Zelda. 

Personally, I’m regretting having let my 7 year old play Minecraft (even though it’s only on the weekends) and I’d rather he not play any educational games on a tablet, either.  
 

The problem isn’t in the intention (Minecraft allows for a ton of creativity.  Education games should be a way to teach in a fun way), it’s that the programmers have gotten SO good at making them.  There’s a constant sense of achievement and reward, the kind that gives you a little dopamine hit and it reminds me of people playing slot machines for hours.  
 

 

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2 minutes ago, LCHorn said:

Personally, I’m regretting having let my 7 year old play Minecraft (even though it’s only on the weekends) and I’d rather he not play any educational games on a tablet, either.  
 

The problem isn’t in the intention (Minecraft allows for a ton of creativity.  Education games should be a way to teach in a fun way), it’s that the programmers have gotten SO good at making them.  There’s a constant sense of achievement and reward, the kind that gives you a little dopamine hit and it reminds me of people playing slot machines for hours.  
 

 

Yep. Meanwhile, "real life" isn't like that. It actually takes practice and work to get better.

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1 hour ago, BabaYaga said:

100%.  Seen it too many times.  We've avoided this by keeping the kids in multiple sports that compliment one another.  The big difference are the parents that grind their kids into moon dust and kids that push themselves.  My youngest we have to reign in.  Some kids are just hyper-driven but can also get overwhelmed - which is what I'm dealing with now.  Food.  Sleep.  Practice.  School.  Time mgmt.  

My kid's followed the play sports by their season pattern. You don't need to play a sport year round to improve. Physical and athletic development will address that overtime. This is really important for kids because if they continue beyond middle school, sports turn into a major grind.

My son's were dual sport athletes in high school, baseball and football. My oldest somehow managed to run track too in high school. Usually, Christmas break was the only time off during the year. Time management was probably the biggest life skill they developed from all of that effort.

 

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1 hour ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Y'all got suggestions for video games?

Kiddo LOVES them. Hell, they are fun. I get it. But I want him to self-moderate more. I don't think I've ever seen him turn it off without being prompted. He also loves talking about it, acting it out, etc. It's his passion.

If he likes them, I want him to be able to enjoy them. But I also want him to be able to play in moderation without having the constant guardrails of mom/dad. I feel like we do a decent job at limiting his play, but he also constantly asks for them when not actively doing something else and he would rather play a video game than play with a friend or be active.

Doesn't help that school seems to like having educational games on the tablet. 

Video games are designed to be addictive and "sticky", just like how potato chips are designed to make you want to eat one more. Treat videogames like potato chips - some are a great treat but you shouldn't be living on em

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3 minutes ago, Captainant said:

Video games are designed to be addictive and "sticky", just like how potato chips are designed to make you want to eat one more. Treat videogames like potato chips - some are a great treat but you shouldn't be living on em

Ummmmm.....

no-life-south-park.gif

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1 hour ago, Frank Drebin said:

My son has gotten into wrestling.  It is just a fantastic sport for a high school boy for all sorts of reasons.  He loves it and does it year round.

The apex of physical conditioning.  Minus the weight cutting part.  Another soccer dad, his youngest is a wrestler.  Like a little chimp.  He F's people up.  Eyeing Ok State - which has a beast of a program.  

Have you watched Vision Quest with him yet....;)

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25 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

The apex of physical conditioning.  Minus the weight cutting part.  Another soccer dad, his youngest is a wrestler.  Like a little chimp.  He F's people up.  Eyeing Ok State - which has a beast of a program.  

Have you watched Vision Quest with him yet....;)

Yes sir.  Two weeks ago. We had to fly through Spokane for Spring Break.  Reminded me of that movie so we went ahead and bought it on Amazon and watched during our ski trip. Love that movie.

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2 hours ago, Frank Drebin said:

We have to rein her in as she would do gymnastics every day instead of once a week if we let her. 

This is my oldest. 20 hours a week at gym (replaces school PE) and who knows how many hours at home during the week.  But she excels at the competitions (1st overall ~30% of the events while podium on ALL but one event (Covid), took 1st overall at state for her group, etc)). Plenty of adversity, time management, diet/health management, and the fitness aspect is off the charts. The mental focus they have to maintain is unreal for some of the skills.  It’s a good balance of team and individual accomplishments.  

Her passion, her goals, and when it’s no longer fun, it’s over.  If grades dip at all, same.  It was nice because she was good but not great at any other sports, except distance running, which she didn’t have a passion for.  Maybe she can pick that one back up in high school. 

Now, if I could get my middle one to not love dressage, I’d be in good shape.  

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Posted (edited)

What’s a Raid Leader (World of Warcraft) and should you hire them?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/whats-raid-leader-should-you-hire-them-peter-clarke/?trackingId=t%2B5cwCdJSIuZXir5uVxpBQ%3D%3D

“When I applied for my first job back in 2008, the skills required to get my foot in the professional world's door were vastly different from what is needed today.

I was applying to a local MGA in my hometown for a role that I later called a CSO role (Chief Scanning Officer), with a side role of 1 Sugar No Milk duties. The main skills required and developed were scanning policy documents and spotting empty coffee cups. We would receive the documents via Fax and Royal Mail from our brokers, and it was my job to scan them in and file them accordingly in our sophisticated Microsoft filing system.

We were at a point where going "paperless" was the main innovation happening in the market, and the fact that the Underwriters could access the pdf version of documents in a searchable format from their computer was revolutionary.

Fourteen years on, and I am now the one hiring young market entrants. The thought of setting them a task such as scanning seems not only belittling to them but also baffling, let alone the thought of trying to explain what a fax is and why it is useful.

The market has, without a doubt, progressed from those days (although paperless is still beyond the reach of some companies). With this progress comes the need for new skills and a different type of CV to what I pulled together all those years ago.

Being captain of the rugby team and on the debating society were considered great extra-curricular activities to mention, they still are—however, the thought of putting down my Zelda or Golden Eye gaming skills would have been laughable.

While I am in no shape or form a 'Gamer' myself, I am more and more admiring the skills of those who play these games and what they can bring to the professional world.

Being able to network online and successfully perform collaborative tasks while never having had face-to-face contact, develops skills that are not only more relevant but will be invaluable to organisations going forward as we adopt a more digital way of working and networking.

After a recent conversation with a young professional who happens to be a "Raid Leader" in World of Warcraft, I'll share some of what I found fascinating about the skills that they have developed and that I desperately want in my team.

To start with, I will explain what World of Warcraft and a Raid Leader actually is as I had no idea until a couple of months ago, and I am sure the majority of my audience are the same. World of Warcraft is an MMORPG (massively-multiplayer online role-playing game), which I am sure means as much to you as it did to me. This acronym really means that it's an online game with lots of people interacting in a continuous world.

What are they doing? They are trying to improve their in-game character by completing collaborative tasks in exchange for rewards and the chance to take on more challenging collaborative tasks. There is plenty more going on, apparently, but that is the gist of it. Raid Leaders are the people who manage and coordinate the teams performing these collaborative tasks.

Managing a rugby team seems like a piece of cake compared to what these raid leaders are achieving. As a further bit of background, Raid Leaders organise and guide around 25 people from all over the world through collaborative tasks, where they all work together with distinct roles and responsibilities to take down large-scale encounters (bosses)…”

 

IMG_2086.jpeg

Edited by Tailgate
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4 hours ago, Tailgate said:

What’s a Raid Leader (World of Warcraft) and should you hire them?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/whats-raid-leader-should-you-hire-them-peter-clarke/?trackingId=t%2B5cwCdJSIuZXir5uVxpBQ%3D%3D

“When I applied for my first job back in 2008, the skills required to get my foot in the professional world's door were vastly different from what is needed today.

I was applying to a local MGA in my hometown for a role that I later called a CSO role (Chief Scanning Officer), with a side role of 1 Sugar No Milk duties. The main skills required and developed were scanning policy documents and spotting empty coffee cups. We would receive the documents via Fax and Royal Mail from our brokers, and it was my job to scan them in and file them accordingly in our sophisticated Microsoft filing system.

We were at a point where going "paperless" was the main innovation happening in the market, and the fact that the Underwriters could access the pdf version of documents in a searchable format from their computer was revolutionary.

Fourteen years on, and I am now the one hiring young market entrants. The thought of setting them a task such as scanning seems not only belittling to them but also baffling, let alone the thought of trying to explain what a fax is and why it is useful.

The market has, without a doubt, progressed from those days (although paperless is still beyond the reach of some companies). With this progress comes the need for new skills and a different type of CV to what I pulled together all those years ago.

Being captain of the rugby team and on the debating society were considered great extra-curricular activities to mention, they still are—however, the thought of putting down my Zelda or Golden Eye gaming skills would have been laughable.

While I am in no shape or form a 'Gamer' myself, I am more and more admiring the skills of those who play these games and what they can bring to the professional world.

Being able to network online and successfully perform collaborative tasks while never having had face-to-face contact, develops skills that are not only more relevant but will be invaluable to organisations going forward as we adopt a more digital way of working and networking.

After a recent conversation with a young professional who happens to be a "Raid Leader" in World of Warcraft, I'll share some of what I found fascinating about the skills that they have developed and that I desperately want in my team.

To start with, I will explain what World of Warcraft and a Raid Leader actually is as I had no idea until a couple of months ago, and I am sure the majority of my audience are the same. World of Warcraft is an MMORPG (massively-multiplayer online role-playing game), which I am sure means as much to you as it did to me. This acronym really means that it's an online game with lots of people interacting in a continuous world.

What are they doing? They are trying to improve their in-game character by completing collaborative tasks in exchange for rewards and the chance to take on more challenging collaborative tasks. There is plenty more going on, apparently, but that is the gist of it. Raid Leaders are the people who manage and coordinate the teams performing these collaborative tasks.

Managing a rugby team seems like a piece of cake compared to what these raid leaders are achieving. As a further bit of background, Raid Leaders organise and guide around 25 people from all over the world through collaborative tasks, where they all work together with distinct roles and responsibilities to take down large-scale encounters (bosses)…”

 

IMG_2086.jpeg

This is a raid leader.

no-life-south-park.gif

 

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4 hours ago, fattyflattie said:

This is my oldest. 20 hours a week at gym (replaces school PE) and who knows how many hours at home during the week.  But she excels at the competitions (1st overall ~30% of the events while podium on ALL but one event (Covid), took 1st overall at state for her group, etc)). Plenty of adversity, time management, diet/health management, and the fitness aspect is off the charts. The mental focus they have to maintain is unreal for some of the skills.  It’s a good balance of team and individual accomplishments.  

Her passion, her goals, and when it’s no longer fun, it’s over.  If grades dip at all, same.  It was nice because she was good but not great at any other sports, except distance running, which she didn’t have a passion for.  Maybe she can pick that one back up in high school. 

Now, if I could get my middle one to not love dressage, I’d be in good shape.  

I have one hard and fast sports rule for my daughters and that is “no riding lessons.”  I saw how my parents went from “trial riding lesson” to owing a horse that cost more than any of our cars that all of a sudden my sister didn’t want. 

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28 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

I have one hard and fast sports rule for my daughters and that is “no riding lessons.”  I saw how my parents went from “trial riding lesson” to owing a horse that cost more than any of our cars that all of a sudden my sister didn’t want. 

I’ve owned horses much longer than I’ve had kids, but point taken.  I’ve been talking them out of rodeo since they were toddlers, but the fancy equine sports never crossed my mind. 

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1 minute ago, fattyflattie said:

I’ve owned horses much longer than I’ve had kids, but point taken.  I’ve been talking them out of rodeo since they were toddlers, but the fancy equine sports never crossed my mind. 

I can’t think of anything I want to own less than a fancy horse. Maybe an Alfa Romeo or one of those snakes that gets big enough to try and eat you. 

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1 hour ago, 956 Worldwide said:

I have one hard and fast sports rule for my daughters and that is “no riding lessons.”  I saw how my parents went from “trial riding lesson” to owing a horse that cost more than any of our cars that all of a sudden my sister didn’t want. 

My ex-wife had the opposite hard and fast rule.

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2 hours ago, F250 said:

This is a raid leader.

no-life-south-park.gif

 

TBH when shit is offline at 3AM that tends to be the motherfucker that's online holding shit down. Lord knows I've taken on call handoffs from those poor bastards in the past

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18 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Y'all got suggestions for video games?

Kiddo LOVES them. Hell, they are fun. I get it. But I want him to self-moderate more. I don't think I've ever seen him turn it off without being prompted. He also loves talking about it, acting it out, etc. It's his passion.

If he likes them, I want him to be able to enjoy them. But I also want him to be able to play in moderation without having the constant guardrails of mom/dad. I feel like we do a decent job at limiting his play, but he also constantly asks for them when not actively doing something else and he would rather play a video game than play with a friend or be active.

Doesn't help that school seems to like having educational games on the tablet. 

 

18 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Lulz. He's seven. He plays Zelda. 

Sounds like my kiddo, who is 6.5. He loves his video games, and loves playing them, and they have educational games on tablets at school, that we also got for him at home because, well, at least he's learning Math.  That being said, we do limit time on the actual switch to only weekends. And with other activities he only has 1 night a week where he can really be on a tablet in the evening, and only educational aps. 

But similar stuff as you describe. He's obsessed with Mario (which came from the movie first, to be fair), and we played Link's Awakening together on the switch. We got him minecraft but he hasn't figured it out on his own yet, and we're not pushing. But he talks about Mario or other games pretty much non stop to strangers, asking questions about it, etc. 

It's something we're monitoring with him as well. Most of the game time is with Mom and Dad, however. Not that we want to be doing that all weekend either. 

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15 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

 

Sounds like my kiddo, who is 6.5. He loves his video games, and loves playing them, and they have educational games on tablets at school, that we also got for him at home because, well, at least he's learning Math.  That being said, we do limit time on the actual switch to only weekends. And with other activities he only has 1 night a week where he can really be on a tablet in the evening, and only educational aps. 

But similar stuff as you describe. He's obsessed with Mario (which came from the movie first, to be fair), and we played Link's Awakening together on the switch. We got him minecraft but he hasn't figured it out on his own yet, and we're not pushing. But he talks about Mario or other games pretty much non stop to strangers, asking questions about it, etc. 

It's something we're monitoring with him as well. Most of the game time is with Mom and Dad, however. Not that we want to be doing that all weekend either. 

Yeah, same situation. I think we've finally worked out the "moodiness" with the games. Used to be that if he was told no, he'd get a little attitude. If we told him to turn it off, we'd get some attitude/delay. That garbage was resolved relatively quick and only occasionally shows up. 

Now I just want him to get to where he realizes that they are fun, but as mentioned above, they are junk food for the brain. Have some, sure, but learn to turn it off and understand it's not life.

I'm not anti video game. I'm anti being obsessed with them. 

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This should make the young people happy.

 

https://www.newsweek.com/older-americans-stis-1884175

Older Americans now have twice as many sexually transmitted infections (STI) when compared to a decade ago, a new study has found.

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the rates of STIs in adults aged 55 and older have doubled over the past decade.

"Rising divorce rates, forgoing condoms as there is no risk of pregnancy, the availability of drugs for sexual dysfunction, the large number of older adults living together in retirement communities, and the increased use of dating apps are likely to have contributed to the growing incidence of STIs in the over 50s", Justyna Kowalska, who is presenting the research, said in a statement.

"These data likely underestimate the true extent of the problem, as limited access to sexual health services for the over 50s, and trying to avoid the stigma and embarrassment both on the part of older people and healthcare professionals, is leading to this age group not seeking help for STIs."

For example, gonorrhea cases rose from 15 per 100,000 people in 2015, to 57 per 100,000 in 2019.

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43 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Yeah, same situation. I think we've finally worked out the "moodiness" with the games. Used to be that if he was told no, he'd get a little attitude. If we told him to turn it off, we'd get some attitude/delay. That garbage was resolved relatively quick and only occasionally shows up. 

Now I just want him to get to where he realizes that they are fun, but as mentioned above, they are junk food for the brain. Have some, sure, but learn to turn it off and understand it's not life.

I'm not anti video game. I'm anti being obsessed with them. 

Same age and situation as you and SydneyCarton. Unfortunately my kid's mother let's him play all the time, which makes it tough for me on the weeks I have him. I try to take my son to the park or outside as much as I can. He wants to go to the music store after school today and I'm very happy to get him something unrelated to video games.  He's obsessed with Zelda, but I get the sense he'll move on if we can find another activity that piques his interest. I think "obsession" with kids can be harnessed into something great as long as they have plenty of different things that make them curious and they want to learn more about. 

Also looking forward to him eventually getting into watching sports. I feel like we're close age-wise. I leave ESPN or Rockets replay on in the morning when he's eating breakfast and he's starting to watch. 

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47 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Yeah, same situation. I think we've finally worked out the "moodiness" with the games. Used to be that if he was told no, he'd get a little attitude. If we told him to turn it off, we'd get some attitude/delay. That garbage was resolved relatively quick and only occasionally shows up. 

Now I just want him to get to where he realizes that they are fun, but as mentioned above, they are junk food for the brain. Have some, sure, but learn to turn it off and understand it's not life.

I'm not anti video game. I'm anti being obsessed with them. 

100% on the bold, and the kids learned very early on that any attitude associated with the rules of gaming/phones just made it worse for them and they got less of it, because I had no choice but to infer that the gaming/phones were what was informing the bad attitude and disobedience so it logically followed that they get less of it to minimize the bad behavior. 

They wised up quickly and began to control their emotions and impulses because we tied that behavior and obedience to positive outcomes (same or more technology time) which I think is necessary mental and emotional work-- building mental discipline and strength that you aren't going to get your way all the time and whining/complaining is not an appropriate response when things happen (or are imposed on you) in life.

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29 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

This should make the young people happy.

 

https://www.newsweek.com/older-americans-stis-1884175

Older Americans now have twice as many sexually transmitted infections (STI) when compared to a decade ago, a new study has found.

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the rates of STIs in adults aged 55 and older have doubled over the past decade.

"Rising divorce rates, forgoing condoms as there is no risk of pregnancy, the availability of drugs for sexual dysfunction, the large number of older adults living together in retirement communities, and the increased use of dating apps are likely to have contributed to the growing incidence of STIs in the over 50s", Justyna Kowalska, who is presenting the research, said in a statement.

"These data likely underestimate the true extent of the problem, as limited access to sexual health services for the over 50s, and trying to avoid the stigma and embarrassment both on the part of older people and healthcare professionals, is leading to this age group not seeking help for STIs."

For example, gonorrhea cases rose from 15 per 100,000 people in 2015, to 57 per 100,000 in 2019.

Obligatory

 

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35 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

This should make the young people happy.

 

https://www.newsweek.com/older-americans-stis-1884175

Older Americans now have twice as many sexually transmitted infections (STI) when compared to a decade ago, a new study has found.

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the rates of STIs in adults aged 55 and older have doubled over the past decade.

"Rising divorce rates, forgoing condoms as there is no risk of pregnancy, the availability of drugs for sexual dysfunction, the large number of older adults living together in retirement communities, and the increased use of dating apps are likely to have contributed to the growing incidence of STIs in the over 50s", Justyna Kowalska, who is presenting the research, said in a statement.

"These data likely underestimate the true extent of the problem, as limited access to sexual health services for the over 50s, and trying to avoid the stigma and embarrassment both on the part of older people and healthcare professionals, is leading to this age group not seeking help for STIs."

For example, gonorrhea cases rose from 15 per 100,000 people in 2015, to 57 per 100,000 in 2019.

Gotta be fake news.  Post-menopausal women don’t have sex.  Ask my wife.  

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Just pulled the baseboard in the kid's bathroom (next to the shower) because I suspected it was getting water to it over the years. Sure enough, it's soaked. Had to then pop off some tiles and have fans on it. The happiness index for a certain kid is about to plummet.

Nah, not really. He didn't know. But he is going to learn how the framing, drywall, paint and trim of a house goes together. Go ahead and replace a leaky valve stem while I'm at it. They don't teach that shit in Zelda.

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15 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Just pulled the baseboard in the kid's bathroom (next to the shower) because I suspected it was getting water to it over the years. Sure enough, it's soaked. Had to then pop off some tiles and have fans on it. The happiness index for a certain kid is about to plummet.

Nah, not really. He didn't know. But he is going to learn how the framing, drywall, paint and trim of a house goes together. Go ahead and replace a leaky valve stem while I'm at it. They don't teach that shit in Zelda.

You're a good parent. My spouse most often has or had the children help with various tasks just as I do. I taught them the basics of lawn stuff because that's my jam (along with cooking and baking) but he's really good at plumbing and the vehicles and while at first, mom and dad were 'dumb' to make them do this stuff, it's funny how the older they've gotten the smarter mom and dad have gotten in their eyes. Although, the year we had a dump truck full of dirt delivered to top dress the entire lawn front and back may go down as the chore from hell because we were all happy to get that one done.

Edited by Mrs Whiggins
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1 minute ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

You're a good parent. My spouse most often has or had the children help with various tasks just as I do. I taught them the basics of lawn stuff because that's my jam (along with cooking and baking) but he's really good at plumbing and the vehicles and while at first, mom and dad were 'dumb' to make them do this stuff, it's funny how the older they've gotten the smarter mom and dad have gotten in their eyes. Although, the year we had a dump truck full of dirt delivered to top dress the entire lawn front and back may go down as the chore from hell because we were all happy to get that one done.

As I got older, the more I loved stuff like the top dressing work. Hard work, sure. But put on some music, you have a straightforward task, and you get to see exactly what you got done at the end of the day.

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2 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

As I got older, the more I loved stuff like the top dressing work. Hard work, sure. But put on some music, you have a straightforward task, and you get to see exactly what you got done at the end of the day.

Definitely had both of my kids take lead on changing out a toilet valve, changing a tire, some intermediate tasks that people just need to know, and to feel good about being able to solve problems yourself.  Also took the boy on ranch work weekends at the place we hunt.  Assembling deer blinds, standing them up, setting up anchor systems, cutting and stacking firewood, again....a lot of basics.  It's satisfying, and they both liked the feeling of looking at something they did, and seeing it work.  Those are timeless things that kids need to do.

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5 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

As I got older, the more I loved stuff like the top dressing work. Hard work, sure. But put on some music, you have a straightforward task, and you get to see exactly what you got done at the end of the day.

They got there...eventually...

The (bigger) one we all enjoyed the most was painting their rooms one at a time. They were involved start to finish with the planning, prep, all of it and yes, the satisfaction was long-lasting and the conversations during the process were a hoot.

 

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5 hours ago, HouTex said:

Gotta be fake news.  Post-menopausal women don’t have sex.  Ask my wife.  

She's having sex, just not with you. *rimshot

2 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Just pulled the baseboard in the kid's bathroom (next to the shower) because I suspected it was getting water to it over the years. Sure enough, it's soaked. Had to then pop off some tiles and have fans on it. The happiness index for a certain kid is about to plummet.

Nah, not really. He didn't know. But he is going to learn how the framing, drywall, paint and trim of a house goes together. Go ahead and replace a leaky valve stem while I'm at it. They don't teach that shit in Zelda.

 

2 hours ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

You're a good parent. My spouse most often has or had the children help with various tasks just as I do. I taught them the basics of lawn stuff because that's my jam (along with cooking and baking) but he's really good at plumbing and the vehicles and while at first, mom and dad were 'dumb' to make them do this stuff, it's funny how the older they've gotten the smarter mom and dad have gotten in their eyes. Although, the year we had a dump truck full of dirt delivered to top dress the entire lawn front and back may go down as the chore from hell because we were all happy to get that one done.

My father was extremely handy, and could fix and work on anything. And he didn't make do any of it with him, or force me, and I'm sure he thought he was being a good dad and not an asshole by letting me just play. But as I got older, I suck at repairing anything, and I really wish he'd forced me to learn some of his skills. Of course, if he had, I'd have bitched and moaned the entire time and probably not appreciated anything I learned now that I'm older. Funny how some situations can create regret no matter what. 

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2 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

Just pulled the baseboard in the kid's bathroom (next to the shower) because I suspected it was getting water to it over the years. Sure enough, it's soaked. Had to then pop off some tiles and have fans on it. The happiness index for a certain kid is about to plummet.

Nah, not really. He didn't know. But he is going to learn how the framing, drywall, paint and trim of a house goes together. Go ahead and replace a leaky valve stem while I'm at it. They don't teach that shit in Zelda.

One of my sons had a talent for dropping toys and other items in the toilet and then flushing it. They would always get stuck which required removing the toilet. I would make him help me remove the toilet, pullout whatever the hell he clogged it with and put back the toilet.

When he was 12/13 he somehow managed to drop a deodorant stick in the bowl and clogged the toilet. I told him that he has seen it done so many times he can fix it himself. He actually did

A few years later, he replaced four toilets, multiple bathroom sink faucets, bathtub and shower heads/faucets all on his own.

He turned into a very useful handyman. Hell, he replaced the A/C compressor for my F250 last September.

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Oh, and one of the best things we ever did (not really knowing how well it would turn out) was to buy the boy a "project" go-kart for his birthday when he was 13 or so.  It ran, and he could drive it around and have fun with it.  But it needed work and tuning (it really was a homemade kart, so some aspects of it did not perform optimally).  We went to Harbor Freight, and I bought him his own set of tools.  And then told him and his friends that they were free to work on it to their hearts' content.  He started out griping about it, but eventually really got into it.  He's now 21, and when he and his friends come home of Christmas and such, one of the things they do is get together to tinker with the go-kart, which they have turned into a semi-armored car.  One of his friends SO got into it that he now has a side hustle of buying busted up go-karts, rehabbing them, then flipping them for a profit.  They get their knuckles scraped and hands oily and dirty, and know how to take apart small engines, all kinds of stuff.  AND, it provided them a fun diversion for years.

Give a kid a project that they can have fun with, and sometimes, they'll run with it.  Maybe we got lucky, but it turned out to be a good thing.  I'm fucking sick of the kart and all the parts and shit taking up half my garage, though.

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17 hours ago, SydneyCarton said:

. Of course, if he had, I'd have bitched and moaned the entire time and probably not appreciated anything I learned now that I'm older. Funny how some situations can create regret no matter what. 

I think you'd have appreciated it.  My dad was incredibly self-sufficient, and he DID force me to help him change the oil, the brakes, repair drywall, repair plumbing, and all of that other stuff. Naturally I was an ungrateful surly little shit of a child, but now, decades later, I really do appreciate it.  Not only for the knowledge, but for the time I shared with my dad, that I didn't even realize was so meaningful.  He was always extremely busy at work, so the times he took to slow down and repair something at home, were some of the rare times we got to spend a lot of time together.

 

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The apex of physical conditioning.  Minus the weight cutting part.  Another soccer dad, his youngest is a wrestler.  Like a little chimp.  He F's people up.  Eyeing Ok State - which has a beast of a program.  
Have you watched Vision Quest with him yet....;)

Did someone say Chimp?
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My father was extremely handy, and could fix and work on anything. And he didn't make do any of it with him, or force me, and I'm sure he thought he was being a good dad and not an asshole by letting me just play. But as I got older, I suck at repairing anything, and I really wish he'd forced me to learn some of his skills. Of course, if he had, I'd have bitched and moaned the entire time and probably not appreciated anything I learned now that I'm older. Funny how some situations can create regret no matter what. 

My Dad is mostly useless at repairs. My learning started with inheriting a car with a blown engine, buying a book and getting to work with my brother (he blew the engine).

When my computer’s power supply failed my father and brother did nothing for months and we went back to our old 286 processor. A friend came over and we diagnosed the problem fixed it for $1 and had a computer running by the end of the day.

Motivation is what is needed. Also working on something that is already broken helps. If you mess it up, its still broke.
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46 minutes ago, Nivek said:


My Dad is mostly useless at repairs. My learning started with inheriting a car with a blown engine, buying a book and getting to work with my brother (he blew the engine).

When my computer’s power supply failed my father and brother did nothing for months and we went back to our old 286 processor. A friend came over and we diagnosed the problem fixed it for $1 and had a computer running by the end of the day.

Motivation is what is needed. Also working on something that is already broken helps. If you mess it up, its still broke.

I’m at the point of my life where my time is more valuable than the extra money it costs for me to have other people fix things. By the time I get supplies, watch the requisite videos, still manage to fuck up several times, something that takes someone else 30 minutes takes me 4 hours. And is probably half assed. Practice makes perfect but how many times will I need to learn now to replace a ceiling fan or a sink fixture in my life at this point? 2, maybe 3 more?
 

There’s a baseline of knowledge and intuition and understanding handy people have acquired over a lifetime that I don’t have, and at this point it’s a conscious choice for me to not spending the time to acquire it. Maybe when I retire. But I somewhat view it as along to learning a language when you’re young versus old. 
 

When I was a kid I built my own computers and messed with all that stuff. I understand that all it takes is motivation. 

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11 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

I’m at the point of my life where my time is more valuable than the extra money it costs for me to have other people fix things. By the time I get supplies, watch the requisite videos, still manage to fuck up several times, something that takes someone else 30 minutes takes me 4 hours. And is probably half assed. Practice makes perfect but how many times will I need to learn now to replace a ceiling fan or a sink fixture in my life at this point? 2, maybe 3 more?
 

There’s a baseline of knowledge and intuition and understanding handy people have acquired over a lifetime that I don’t have, and at this point it’s a conscious choice for me to not spending the time to acquire it. Maybe when I retire. But I somewhat view it as along to learning a language when you’re young versus old. 
 

When I was a kid I built my own computers and messed with all that stuff. I understand that all it takes is motivation. 

Absolutely get it.  There are some things I choose to do on my own, because for me they are easy and quick, and I also enjoy the DIY aspect of a lot of things.

But there are also things I know how to do, that I still hire out.  For example I no longer change my own oil because the time it takes me to do the work, and then dispose of the waste, isn't worth it.  The shop can do it more efficiently than I can and I'm happy to spend the money and let them do so.

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