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immamac has permabanmed me against bob’s wishes. read this thread before it disappears.


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6 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

the whole deal where bob and i (and my mom) started meeting and talking spawned from motown going on a particularly unhinged series of ad hominem attacks on me which were affecting my mental health. when i reached my boiling point and posted my raw, honest sentiments, bob stepped in in real life, because back on hornfans we had a poster named loree who was bullied on the board and ended up killing herself, and bob wanted to step in and help out. once bob saw motown’s rabid harassment of me for what it was he gave motown an ultimatum: leave derka alone or get out of here. after all, he was the one coming after me literally 100% of the time.

im not asking for special treatment. i’m asking for basic human decency. and bob, who everyone here has the ultimate respect for, agreed with me and had my back so deeply that he was in the process of IP banning the one guy who simply could not stop himself from repeatedly coming after me, totally unprovoked, time and time again, despite having multiple conversations with bob where he was told to leave me alone or face being banned.

this was months of dinners, and texts, and stories exchanged, and common ground found, and real, earnest, sincere work being done between two people who have never seen eye to eye but who want to understand each other. bob and i reached that understanding, and his judgment of this situation led to him making the decision to IP ban motownhorn.

now immamac comes in here and lies through his teeth, claiming that i am constantly provoking motownhorn, that i go out of my way to be combative, and that my antagonistic posts derail threads, all of which is the opposite of reality, as bob knows. immamac has come in here with his pussy ass, petty ass, personal beef with me and he has completely erased every single thing that bob spent months of his life trying to accomplish.

do you guys have any clue how many texts i sent bob? do you know how long they all were? do you know how insufferable i was when i was feeling wronged? when motown wouldn’t quit? bob put up with ALL OF IT because he genuinely cares about me, and because he took the time to a)get to know me, and b)survey the situation for himself and come to his own conclusions.

and now in one hypomanic instant, this aggie fuckstick has undone and delegitimized all of that, and he’s proud of himself for it. for those who missed it he made a whole site banner drawing everyone’s attention to this thread, stupidly thinking that it would make me look bad.

what immamac has done is not some funny, harmless, “buncha assholes”, good ole redass aggie bull. this dude has fucked up months of real life work between bob and myself, and has disrespected both of us on a tremendous level in the process. this is seriously a dark day for this site and it’s owner, and anyone who has read this thread this far who still can’t see that needs to reevaluate some shit in their lives. this is beyond foul, and it all comes down to one turd of a person’s super fragile ego. i really don’t even know what to say. i’m in disbelief at how this situation has played out.

what happened to Loree was terrible.

hornfans didn't have an ignore feature; surly does. this is WHY it has one.

 

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13 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

 bullshit. i’m not going to keep repeating over and over about how bob, myself, and my mom have been working on this very issue for months, including daily texts between me and bob. bob and i made deals, deals which you have undone in one fell swoop, in the most callous, power thirty, pathetic way possible. 

how do you not get how disrespectful this is to everyone involved, including bob? he can’t do his moderator job on his own? you just get to undo months of me working with him and months of him giving orders to motown? you really don’t see what an epic, gaping asshole you are, do you?

He doesn't care, Derka.  Trying to make him care is not going to work.  Seems shitty to me, but it's his site.

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20 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

ignore feature;

yeah but ignore feature doesn't prevent abuse from being platformed and it's still a problem if you are being told by the people you haven't ignored that you're getting dragged by someone you thought would get banned

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2 hours ago, chainsaw said:

  

So I saw something mentioned about rules and how Derka's tormentor hasn't broken any in the judgment of one of the mods, and I know we joke about "rules" when it comes to people's girlfriends or sisters being mentioned, but I had never actually stopped to consider that there are actual rules.

When I checked for these rules, I could only find a Privacy Policy.

If there are no "rules" I can respect that, but it's probably better to have some objective and reasonable rules so that people can't join, post stupid shit repeatedly, then act surprised when they get banned.

As much as 99% of us can get along just fine based on common sense, this is the internet. Even less than 1 percent of people who lack common sense can ruin the experience for the rest of us. People like that are why the rules exist.

Anyway, I want this board and this community to succeed.

A wise man once said, in a pinned thread:

If you view the board as property, then sure, the owner can ban anyone for any reason or no reason at all.

I really hope it's more than just property, though. I believe it's a community and yes, for the people who have invested time and money, it is also a business.

From a business standpoint, I'm not sure I understand the benefit of disregarding a potential mental health crisis. I definitely won't go so far as to say that banning Derka or backing out of (what Derka claims was) the "deal" is the wrong thing to do. I wouldn't go that far because I'm not privy to all the facts. For all we know, Derka totally misunderstood or exaggerated what "Bob" had promised to do.

Instead of going that far, I'll just say that I don't think it would be good for the community's reputation or business prospects if Derka's version of events is true and something unfortunate and preventable were to happen while he was suffering a mental health crisis. Whatever the actual rules are, it's best for the community if those rules are enforced fairly and equally, even when that means people I don't particularly care for get to continue posting and even when that means people I like get banned.

I think we agree?  I have few personal rules I abide by here. I try not to call people names, I don't tolerate slurs, and I think bullying should be 100% off limits, period. 

there's some inflammatory language in derka's posts that are unfortunate that will make it really, really hard for an owner to be his ally. I hope derka will stop.  I also think the bullying behavior needs to stop. that shit's wrong.  not my site, but if I come across it I'll call it out. I won't abide.

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6 minutes ago, troph said:

I try not to call people names, I don't tolerate slurs, and I think bullying should be 100% off limits, period. 

But what about that time you called me a cis-panzy and said you were going to kick my ass?

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Imma just needs to arrange a mentorship program between Donkey Cigars and Derka. If anyone knows how to master the art of not giving a fuck about what others say about them on this board, it's donkey.

A couple of months, maybe years from now this could be them.

karate-mr-miyagi.gif

 

However it's possible Donkey pulls a Terry Silver.

terry-silver.gif

 

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1 hour ago, cactusflinthead said:

Is this in the gif catalog if so what was the search query? I've looked several times for it.

I think you have to be at least 45 to know about The Wide World of Sports.

 

Yes but for some reason only with the cartoon faces

 

IMG_1110.thumb.png.261cb8dae35cf0039cb47c1418dc44af.png

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38 minutes ago, South Austin said:

But what about that time you called me a cis-panzy and said you were going to kick my ass?

Hey man I said I try. But you’re a bit much sometimes. 

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2 hours ago, chainsaw said:

yeah but ignore feature doesn't prevent abuse from being platformed and it's still a problem if you are being told by the people you haven't ignored that you're getting dragged by someone you thought would get banned

It helps a LOT, though.

I can see that this thread is giving me some new users to ignore, too...

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Just now, Rimbo said:

It helps a LOT, though.

I can see that this thread is giving me some new users to ignore, too...

Yeah, but you and I are in the 99% of people who don't get bothered as easily. Some people are burdened by mental illness. It's not your problem or nor is it your responsibility, and it's not really the mod team's responsibility either, to extend unreasonable accommodations to people who are stuck with those unfortunate burdens.

I just think that once you got to the point where someone feels like they were promised something, the best thing you can do from a business standpoint is to bite the bullet and honor it, unless honoring the promise costs more than the benefit.

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Posted (edited)
3 minutes ago, chainsaw said:

Yeah, but you and I are in the 99% of people who don't get bothered as easily. Some people are burdened by mental illness. It's not your problem or nor is it your responsibility, and it's not really the mod team's responsibility either, to extend unreasonable accommodations to people who are stuck with those unfortunate burdens.

I just think that once you got to the point where someone feels like they were promised something, the best thing you can do from a business standpoint is to bite the bullet and honor it, unless honoring the promise costs more than the benefit.

No, I'm really not. I've gone full Derka many times in the past, and still struggle with it even now. Ditched hornfans long before the great Shaggy Exodus not because of all the reasons the rest of us left, but because I just couldn't deal with myself anymore. And I've definitely had some spats even with people here, where I just couldn't let things slide.

I got better over time because I got older, I got more perspective, Surly got older and more mature, I more or less DROPPED some of the message boards I used to visit regularly (where my username is now a verb, just like Derka's is here) and,

most of all,

heavy use of the Ignore feature.

Edited by Rimbo
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3 hours ago, chainsaw said:

If there are no "rules" I can respect that, but it's probably better to have some objective and reasonable rules so that people can't join, post stupid shit repeatedly, then act surprised when they get banned.

Imma posted some written rules when the new site was established -- likely buried really deep in this sub.

The ones that I remember are:

  1. No death threats, death wishes, or telling another poster to kill themselves.
  2. No trolling.
  3. No doxxing.
  4. No NSFW content outside IPIHB.

Then, there are reportable offenses itemized as additional specific no-nos. I think Imma also said if three users report a post as anti-LQBTq, it results in an auto-timeout for that poster.

image.thumb.png.d9ac3e16efe87d6da729f9fb8bcd459c.png

 

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Posted (edited)
55 minutes ago, F250 said:

Imma just needs to arrange a mentorship program between Donkey Cigars and Derka. If anyone knows how to master the art of not giving a fuck about what others say about them on this board, it's donkey.

A couple of months, maybe years from now this could be them.

karate-mr-miyagi.gif

 

However it's possible Donkey pulls a Terry Silver.

terry-silver.gif

 

The key to not caring what internet trolls say and take it personal, in my experience, is simply being tall, dark and handsome IRL. You can't hurt that person's feelings.

Edited by BeardIP
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3 minutes ago, bolverk said:

Imma posted some written rules when the new site was established -- likely buried really deep in this sub.

The ones that I remember are:

  1. No death threats, death wishes, or telling another poster to kill themselves.
  2. No trolling.
  3. No doxxing.
  4. No NSFW content outside IPIHB.

Then, there are reportable offenses itemized as additional specific no-nos. I think Imma also said if three users report a post as anti-LQBTq, it results in an auto-timeout for that poster.

image.thumb.png.d9ac3e16efe87d6da729f9fb8bcd459c.png

 

Thanks. I don't think I've ever needed to report a post so I hadn't seen that.

This is a good start but there are probably ways to build on this foundation.

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1 hour ago, Incredulity said:

huh, all this time I just thought Derka was Surly-mentally ill, not mentally ill-mentally ill.

 

Knowing The More You Know GIF by Joey Bada$$

 

 

 

1 hour ago, chainsaw said:

hqdefault.jpg

 

1 hour ago, F250 said:

Imma just needs to arrange a mentorship program between Donkey Cigars and Derka. If anyone knows how to master the art of not giving a fuck about what others say about them on this board, it's donkey.

A couple of months, maybe years from now this could be them.

karate-mr-miyagi.gif

 

However it's possible Donkey pulls a Terry Silver.

terry-silver.gif

 

 

14 minutes ago, chainsaw said:

Yeah, but you and I are in the 99% of people who don't get bothered as easily. Some people are burdened by mental illness. It's not your problem or nor is it your responsibility, and it's not really the mod team's responsibility either, to extend unreasonable accommodations to people who are stuck with those unfortunate burdens.

I just think that once you got to the point where someone feels like they were promised something, the best thing you can do from a business standpoint is to bite the bullet and honor it, unless honoring the promise costs more than the benefit.

 

10 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

No, I'm really not. I've gone full Derka many times in the past, and still struggle with it even now. Ditched hornfans long before the great Shaggy Exodus not because of all the reasons the rest of us left, but because I just couldn't deal with myself anymore. And I've definitely had some spats even with people here, where I just couldn't let things slide.

I got better over time because I got older, I got more perspective, Surly got older and more mature, I more or less DROPPED some of the message boards I used to visit regularly (where my username is now a verb, just like Derka's is here) and,

most of all,

heavy use of the Ignore feature.

 

7 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

I cannot emphasize enough that there is a message board out there where they commonly use the phrase "to Rimbo something up" and it actually means something

 

6 minutes ago, BeardIP said:

The key to not caring what internet trolls say and take it personal, in my experience, is simply being tall, dark and handsome IRL. You can't hurt that person's feelings.

Hi I'm ztejas and I'm an alcoholic.

(is that what we're doing?)

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14 minutes ago, chainsaw said:

Thanks. I don't think I've ever needed to report a post so I hadn't seen that.

This is a good start but there are probably ways to build on this foundation.

@immamac (or one of the other mods) actually did list out specific rules when the site was first getting up and running. Those should probably be tracked down and stickied at the top of "Can you help me with this?" so that we all know what they are.

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Who else has a problem where they want someone else permabanned because of chronic and habitual bullying? I'll hang up and listen and make some rules around it if it's an actual problem.

I'm not trying to be obtuse, but I think I'm very direct and clear with people when things get to a point where they need to choose to move on and stay or move on and leave. 

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It would be helpful if putting someone on ignore means you also don't see their posts if someone quotes them. This has been brought up to you before. I'm not sure if that's too difficult to do or you don't want to put in the effort but it might help to not have these continual issues.

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17 minutes ago, mdmost said:

It would be helpful if putting someone on ignore means you also don't see their posts if someone quotes them. This has been brought up to you before. I'm not sure if that's too difficult to do or you don't want to put in the effort but it might help to not have these continual issues.

threads is very good at this

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21 minutes ago, mdmost said:

It would be helpful if putting someone on ignore means you also don't see their posts if someone quotes them. This has been brought up to you before. I'm not sure if that's too difficult to do or you don't want to put in the effort but it might help to not have these continual issues.

Are you expecting him to build his own bbs software and implement that product feature into their code? Is it a reasonable request to ask for bespoke things like features from the guy who is basically the admin/budget owner for a product that he doesn't own and has to license?

Or did I miss the part where immamac developed this website and the messageboard software? Maybe he did for all I know, I just assumed not.

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20 minutes ago, mdmost said:

It would be helpful if putting someone on ignore means you also don't see their posts if someone quotes them. This has been brought up to you before. I'm not sure if that's too difficult to do or you don't want to put in the effort but it might help to not have these continual issues.

This. I’ve got a guy on ignore, and he’s constantly quoted. It’d be helpful if ignored posters simply did not appear at all, as if you blocked a spam number on your iPhone. Weak willed people will look at messages from ignored posters because it’s readily available, and, people love to be enraged. 

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This is what some other sites I go to can do when you ignore someone. If you click on the show ignored content, it will show the post and that's on you. If this is adopted and Derka can't resist the temptation to see what's being said by the ignored person then that's on him. It's also on the other people who put Derka on ignore but can't stop themselves from going in after him. 

Screenshot2024-04-05at3_23_41PM.thumb.png.662d8c1103ec06c64d26240644853d7a.png

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Posted (edited)
5 minutes ago, BeardIP said:

Are you expecting him to build his own bbs software and implement that product feature into their code? Is it a reasonable request to ask for bespoke things like features from the guy who is basically the admin/budget owner for a product that he doesn't own and has to license?

Or did I miss the part where immamac developed this website and the messageboard software? Maybe he did for all I know, I just assumed not.

I would imagine it's a feature that can be added to the existing forum software. Maybe it can't. Ignore was added so I don't see that being something overly complex. The forum I posted the image from above isn't some high dollar site. It's just some people who liked an old forum that was killed off. 

This is the software that site uses: Community platform by XenForo® © 2010-2024 XenForo Ltd.

Edited by mdmost
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33 minutes ago, immamac said:

Who else has a problem where they want someone else permabanned because of chronic and habitual bullying? I'll hang up and listen and make some rules around it if it's an actual problem.

I'm not trying to be obtuse, but I think I'm very direct and clear with people when things get to a point where they need to choose to move on and stay or move on and leave. 

This boils down to whether you feel Derka is a valued part of this community or not.  Many of us feel like he is.  You seem to disagree.

He is who he is.  Repeating the same thing over and over isn't going to change that.

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35 minutes ago, immamac said:

Who else has a problem where they want someone else permabanned because of chronic and habitual bullying? I'll hang up and listen and make some rules around it if it's an actual problem.

I'm not trying to be obtuse, but I think I'm very direct and clear with people when things get to a point where they need to choose to move on and stay or move on and leave. 

I may need a safe space if the Astros win the series this weekend.

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32 minutes ago, immamac said:

Who else has a problem where they want someone else permabanned because of chronic and habitual bullying? I'll hang up and listen and make some rules around it if it's an actual problem.

I'm not trying to be obtuse, but I think I'm very direct and clear with people when things get to a point where they need to choose to move on and stay or move on and leave. 

I think there should be a rule that being too unhinged about or fixated on a particular person is bannable. Doesn't have to be limited to bullying, either. I'm sure it has come up where a woman is uncomfortable due to someone's "positive" attention or comments about her. Some people can take it in stride, but they shouldn't have to get to the point where they need to complain. Most people don't have an attachment to the community anywhere close to what Derka has, and they're just going to leave, and when people leave, forums die.

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7 minutes ago, Chewbacca said:

This boils down to whether you feel Derka is a valued part of this community or not.  Many of us feel like he is.

Isn't there already a feature for this situation? If enough people value Derka then they can issue a fatwa and crowdsource Derka's antagonist. This isn't an uncommon occurrence on the board.

 

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6 minutes ago, F250 said:

Isn't there already a feature for this situation? If enough people value Derka then they can issue a fatwa and crowdsource Derka's antagonist. This isn't an uncommon occurrence on the board.

 

Crowdsourcing doesn't work, as we've seen over and over with a couple posters here.

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Posted (edited)
4 minutes ago, Chewbacca said:

Is that imma on the right?  Why is he protesting at his own HQ?

That has the makings of a good aggy joke.

Edited by royiv
GD autocorrect
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11 minutes ago, Chewbacca said:

Crowdsourcing doesn't work, as we've seen over and over with a couple posters here.

As Imma pointed out. Currently, perma ban isn't enforced with crowdsourcing. However, I don't see why a rule couldn't be added for crowdsourcing bullies and enforced with a permanent ban.

 

 

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Posted (edited)
Just now, F250 said:

As Imma pointed out. Currently, perma ban isn't enforced with crowdsourcing. However, I don't see why a rule couldn't be added for crowdsourcing bullies and enforced with a permanent ban.

 

 

Unless you IP ban them (and I don't know if that's even an option), they'll come right back.  It's what bullies do.

Edited by Chewbacca
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Just now, Chewbacca said:

Unless you IP ban them (and I don't know if that's even an option), they'll come right back.  It's what bullies do.

Well, if the ignore feature and banning isn't enough.

Then the only option would be to create a dedicated subforum for Derka and make him a mod to grant and revoke access to users to his subforum.

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