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Posted
4 minutes ago, demos said:

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One of the stalwarts in the SB thread needs to test this out.  Take your SB out to a shanty to ice fish and report back, please.

Posted
9 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

So I need to get a shanty, and then advertise ice fishing services? I'm confused. Tell me more.

Only if you’re a working girl. 

Posted
9 minutes ago, huge said:

There was a lot of dark shit in that one that I don't like.

Seriously. Those are some twisted people who it appears committed horrific crimes against children. Hopefully, as both a pedo and a former cop, scumbag husband will get earthly justice meted out by his fellow inmates. 

  • Like 1
Posted
On 1/18/2022 at 12:26 PM, Kyrie Eleison said:

https://nation.lk/online/impotent-man-s-partner-accidentally-deploys-insulation-foam-inside-his-urethra-during-sex-act-166307.html?utm_source

Impotent man's partner accidentally deploys insulation foam inside his urethra during sex act

An American man may never be able to use his penis again after his partner accidentally sprayed expanding foam up his urethra in a sex act gone wrong. 

The 45-year-old patient had to have a new opening cut between his scrotum and his anus to urinate when the foam hardened and became 'anchored' in his penis.  

Medics who treated him said he will only qualify for reconstructive surgery if he passes a psychiatric evaluation. 

The unidentified man was struggling with impotence, and had been inserting various objects into the opening of his penis during sex to stay erect.  

But things went horribly wrong during one of these sessions when the man's partner tried to use the straw of a can of weatherproofing spray to keep him firm. 

At some point the man's partner accidently hit the button on top of the can, deploying the foam inside of his penis.

The foam, normally used for home insulation, hardened and the man was left with several masses in the inside of his member and bladder. 

A CT scan revealed the masses of the hardened insulation foam sprayed into the man's penis and bladder (shown, arrows). The 45-year-old and his partner had been inserting objects into his penis in a misguided attempt to treat his erectile dysfunction but their efforts went horrifically wrong when they used the straw connected to a can of weatherproofing foam

Pictured here is the total amount of insulation foam removed from the man's bladder and penis after it was unintentionally sprayed inside him. Some of the pieces measured up to 10cm in length and up to 4.3cm in width

The pieces of foam that became trapped inside the man's penis. These pieces proved too hard to remove by pulling them out of the penis so instead doctors opted to remove them by cutting a hole in the man's perineum, the area between the scrotum and the anus. Some of these pieces were  up to 16mm in length

Urologists who detailed the incident in Urology Case Reports said the man waited three weeks to seek medical attention.

He only went for treatment after finding it increasingly sore and difficult to urinate. By the time he arrived at hospital he was passing blood.

This sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen.  The next batch of foam is going to come with a disclaimer on the can “do not insert this in any body orifice, doing so may result in bodily harm and being called a dipshit by your bros”

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted
Quote

Investigators said Schabusiness told them she and the victim had been doing drugs and having sex. She said they had used chains while having sex, and she went “crazy” and started strangling the victim.

 

Posted

Assistant principal fired for reading children's book with the word 'butt' in the title

Toby Price was just filling in for another school official. Little did he know it would lead to his termination.

March 11, 2022
An assistant principal at a Mississippi school has been fired after reading a children's book called "I Need a New Butt" to a second grade class, the latest in a string of school book controversies happening around the country. Toby Price, who was assistant principal at Gary Road Elementary School for three years, told the Washington Post he was asked to schedule a Zoom meeting for another school official to read to second grade classes.
When they didn't show up, Price was asked to do the reading instead. So he grabbed one of his favorite books that he had nearby, titled "I Need a New Butt!", which he said the second graders loved. A description for the children's book, written by author Dawn McMillan, says a child sets off to find a new butt after discovering that his "has a huge crack.”

"It’s a funny, silly book,” Price, 46, told the Post. “I’m a firm believer that … if kids see that books can be funny and silly, they’ll hang around long enough to see all the other cool things that books can be."

But after the class ended, Price was summoned to the principal's office and warned that parents would complain about his choice of book. "They kind of just let me have it," Price told the Post. "She said, 'Is this the kind of thing you find funny and silly? Fart and butt and bulletproof butts?' And I said, 'Yeah, I did until I walked in.'"

Price was placed on administrative leave and two days later, he was fired. He said he had not heard of any complaints from parents about the book. The district's superintendent wrote in Price's termination letter that he showed "a lack of professionalism and impaired judgment" when he chose the book. 


….

https://www.chron.com/politics/article/I-need-a-New-Butt-book-principal-fired-16994414.php

  • Hook 'Em 1
Posted
14 hours ago, nnm said:

Assistant principal fired for reading children's book with the word 'butt' in the title

Toby Price was just filling in for another school official. Little did he know it would lead to his termination.

March 11, 2022
An assistant principal at a Mississippi school has been fired after reading a children's book called "I Need a New Butt" to a second grade class, the latest in a string of school book controversies happening around the country. Toby Price, who was assistant principal at Gary Road Elementary School for three years, told the Washington Post he was asked to schedule a Zoom meeting for another school official to read to second grade classes.
When they didn't show up, Price was asked to do the reading instead. So he grabbed one of his favorite books that he had nearby, titled "I Need a New Butt!", which he said the second graders loved. A description for the children's book, written by author Dawn McMillan, says a child sets off to find a new butt after discovering that his "has a huge crack.”

"It’s a funny, silly book,” Price, 46, told the Post. “I’m a firm believer that … if kids see that books can be funny and silly, they’ll hang around long enough to see all the other cool things that books can be."

But after the class ended, Price was summoned to the principal's office and warned that parents would complain about his choice of book. "They kind of just let me have it," Price told the Post. "She said, 'Is this the kind of thing you find funny and silly? Fart and butt and bulletproof butts?' And I said, 'Yeah, I did until I walked in.'"

Price was placed on administrative leave and two days later, he was fired. He said he had not heard of any complaints from parents about the book. The district's superintendent wrote in Price's termination letter that he showed "a lack of professionalism and impaired judgment" when he chose the book. 


….

https://www.chron.com/politics/article/I-need-a-New-Butt-book-principal-fired-16994414.php

The folks who objected to that need to get the sticks out of their asses.

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Posted
1 hour ago, Scheiss Meister said:

The folks who objected to that need to get the sticks out of their asses.

Yeah, surly would be unanimous in finding humor in fart, butt, and bulletproof butts. 

  • Hook 'Em 2
Posted (edited)

  

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Grocery shopping often feels like a rote chore. That’s why it’s so refreshing to see one supermarket giant offer a new, free service that could elevate any routine food run into a pleasant, even rewarding experience: Whole Foods just announced that customers are free to weigh big ass titties in the produce scales if they ever feel like it.

What a simple but genius way to improve the customer experience. Whole Foods is truly going the extra mile!

At a press conference earlier today, Whole Foods declared that if customers ever feel inclined to weigh fat-ass boobs that got some swing on ‘em, they can go on ahead and plop those things in the produce scales at any Whole Foods store location, regardless of whether they plan to make any purchases afterwards. Recognizing how difficult it can be to calculate the heft of serious mommy milkers using a step-on bathroom scale at home, Whole Foods explained that their produce scales are pretty much at chest height for the majority of people, making the accommodation an easy, zero-cost way to both reward loyal shoppers and attract new ones.

 

“We believe in setting ourselves apart from other grocery chains. Letting consumers check out the exact poundage of bust they’re working with is just one way we show that,” said Whole Foods CEO John Mackey. He then demonstrated the new policy in front of reporters by taking one of his wife’s double-G cup assets and dumping it into a produce scale with a loud thud, bolting the scale’s red dial up to the 3.5 lbs mark and eliciting an eruption of applause from the crowd.

“It’s natural to be curious about how much your breasts weigh. Now, if you’d like to quantify just how buxom you are, simply head on down to your local Whole Foods and plop those puppies in one of our fruit, vegetable, or deli scales, free of charge. Please note that if you’re under five feet tall, we’re not putting step stools out there, but you can feel free to climb up on a pile of vegetables to weigh your canons—or maybe ask a strong friend to lift you up until your tits reach the scale. Whatever makes your shopping experience at Whole Foods the best it can be.”

Yup, Whole Foods is about to gain a lot of new customers with this sensible new service!

Don’t be surprised if you see other supermarket chains start letting people weigh fat fucking titties in their produce scales soon, because this is seriously genius. Whole Foods just threw down the gauntlet and proved once and for all why they’re so far ahead of their competitors. Way to put people first, Whole Foods!

“It’s natural to be curious about how much your breasts weigh. Now, if you’d like to quantify just how buxom you are, simply head on down to your local Whole Foods and plop those puppies in one of our fruit, vegetable, or deli scales, free of charge. Please note that if you’re under five feet tall, we’re not putting step stools out there, but you can feel free to climb up on a pile of vegetables to weigh your canons—or maybe ask a strong friend to lift you up until your tits reach the scale. Whatever makes your shopping experience at Whole Foods the best it can be.”

Yup, Whole Foods is about to gain a lot of new customers with this sensible new service!

Don’t be surprised if you see other supermarket chains start letting people weigh fat fucking titties in their produce scales soon, because this is seriously genius. Whole Foods just threw down the gauntlet and proved once and for all why they’re so far ahead of their competitors. Way to put people first, Whole Foods!

Edited by 'stache
Posted

These People Who Work From Home Have a Secret: They Have Two Jobs

When the pandemic freed employees from having to report to the office, some saw an opportunity to double their salary on the sly. Why be good at one job, they thought, when they could be mediocre at two?




https://www.wsj.com/articles/these-people-who-work-from-home-have-a-secret-they-have-two-jobs-11628866529?st=d1pwczaow5hkcql&mod=ff_921

Posted

So, Jet Ski Guy is like the posters from other teams that start off borderline tolerable, so we let them on board. Then, just like Pontoon Boat Guy, we kill them when they become annoying.

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