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    NeverMarryAStripper

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Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation on 11/28/19 in all areas

  1. I’m up at the ranch with my mom, siblings, and all of our extended families. It’s about 30 people in all, just like very year. This year mom finally decided she was too old to be in charge of the cooking and appointed my sister her successor. After the kitchen fire this morning my sister broke down and cried saying she couldn’t cook, didn’t like to cook, and it wasn’t fair. I’m not sure if we’re having Thanksgiving now or not.
    26 points
  2. On Friday when the Longhorns take the field, I will be in the stadium with my wife and two daughters. I don't like the way the season has gone any more than the rest of you, but I don't miss a game if I can help it. This marks the 50th season that I've been going to Texas football games, including a 40 year stretch where I missed a total of 3 games. I even regret missing those. My dad started taking me to games regularly in 1969. He worked hard all the time but he made time for us to go to the home games and we had a great time. While the '69 and '70 seasons were special, I would have enjoyed them even if we had been losing. That hasn't changed for me in 50 years. The Longhorns are my team and if I were to live another 50 years I probably wouldn't go to enough games to satisfy me. At 59 the math is pretty simple, if I get to go until i'm 80, go to all the home games and OU that's 7 games a year for 21 years. 147 games, for me that's just not enough. You can stay home if you wish because we haven't notched a 10 win season or because you believe that it sends some kind of message, I think that you're cheating yourself out of a good time. That '69 seasons first home game was against Tech, we beat them 49-7 and I got to see it with my dad. On Friday I get to see Texas vs.Tech with my family. Win or lose I'll support the Longhorns. Come out and join us, I'll be there.
    24 points
  3. Update: Arrived after a 30 minute drive to go roughly 10 miles due to construction where we then waited from 10:50 to 12:00 in line to get our cafeteria food. I've never seen a worse spectacle of humanity. 1.5 hour at this point for these people It smelled as bad as it looks in there. [CR] Sure, wear your Trump hat to Thanksgiving [/CR] Shit ton of Aggies everywhere really completed the whole deal. If God turns out to be real this is a very good sample of what my eternity will look like near the Lake of Fire.
    17 points
  4. My MIL asked me to handle the turkey this year. I declined her offer to procure the turkey since I knew that it would be the cheapest one that she could find and that it would likely be half-frozen and unbrined when I arrived. So far this morning she has questioned every aspect of the turkey preparation. Where did you get it? Central Market. Did you thaw it properly? It’s never been frozen. Did you transport it properly? Yes. See that big cooler of ice over there... Why isn’t it brined? I dry brined it. Look it up. Make sure you don’t undercook it. In a slow year, I cook for over 1000 people. I know what I’m doing. Why are you drinking so early?
    13 points
  5. The thought of him torching aggy every year in Jerry's dome makes my heart warm
    12 points
  6. His career winning percentage is within one percentage point of Tom Herman's at Texas. Same 6-5 record this year. He's never won so much as a division title. His teams don't play defense. Good defensive coordinators routinely handle his air raid system. Not a particularly great recruiter. The surly Leach fanboi thing is weird. Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk
    10 points
  7. Order has been restored to the universe:
    10 points
  8. You have nuts at your house? Sorry, I’m allergic so you need to get rid of them and disinfect the house before I can come over.
    10 points
  9. Since my ex and I split up this last year, I’m enjoying my first Aggie Free Thanksgiving in six years (his whole family went to A&M). I’m opening up the bar and spending my day serving booze.
    9 points
  10. Pretty sure I shared this story on shaggy and maybe even hornfans years ago. But figured I’d repost it for fun. A lot of you guys know my ex is from Vidor. So her family is all there of course. We would go there for thanksgiving on most years because my family wasn’t always in town. The first time I ever went there for Thanksgiving I was prepared for all kinds of racism. Frankly they just assumed I was Mexican since I talk Mexican as they would say. Full disclosure I’m 50% Argentine. So we are sitting there at the table and my ex SIL looks at me and asks what my family does for thanksgiving. The implication being we didn’t do what they do. She had basically lived in a trailer out there her whole life until she married my BIL. Without losing a beat I tell her that we cook a bunch of food and make our own burritos. Then we sit at the table and put a candle in our burritos and make a thanksgiving wish. Blow out the candle and eat. They thought I was serious. It was an amazing moment. And since that day I like to bring the burrito up every year. So Happy Thanksgiving assholes!
    8 points
  11. I’m going to my redneck brother in laws which is always a opportunity for stupid or crazy shit. My favorite quote of his was At Christmas a few years back, him talking to his son about a truck they were fixing up for him when he gets his license. “Boy you better pass summer school cause you ain’t driving to junior high”. They are dumb as a block of bricks.
    8 points
  12. FTR pitchers of pilsner and kolsch at my brewery are $15. gtfo charging $26 for a pitcher of pils.
    8 points
  13. I’ve got all of my dad’s memorabilia from Monsanto Texas City, after he passed. Hard hats, zippos, matchbooks, anniversary rings, clipboards, etc. He went to work at Monsanto (Chemist), after graduating from Texas in 1956. My grandfather was the Fire Chief for Texas City during the TC Disaster in 1947. He was killed during the first explosion. I have all of his badges, etc. I always thought how strange it must have been to work all of those years at the same location where his father died.
    7 points
  14. If the OC option comes down to Graham Harrell & Joe Brady, Harrell is the safer option. Harrell has already shown he's a capable playcaller at 2 different stops, while Joe Brady has NEVER been a playcaller. Also we don't know if Joe Brady lucked into right QB in Joe Burrow, we need to see how the LSU offense looks like next season without Burrow.
    7 points
  15. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, but now more than ever I realize it is our holiday. I was hopeless before sobriety countless times and I have been fairly close to hopeless even in sobriety. My mind has a tendency to look at the future as a dark void when things aren't going the way I want them in the present. I am so lucky today though to have tools, most important of which is gratitude. It is a powerful fucking weapon against my biggest demon, hopelessness. When I take a moment to realize I have a bed, a roof, or even a few people care about me, I can reset and see a tiny bit of light in the darkness of my thoughts. If I choose to follow the light that gratitude gives me, I can face the day and see what the world has yet to show me. I'm so thankful for being taught to pause and count my small blessings, because sometimes I just need one more day to change it all. So grateful for you all. Tell someone you're thankful for them today. It might just save a life, and that life might be yours. Much love, happy Thanksgiving Day.
    7 points
  16. Went to the 7am at Harbor this morning where a host of friends (52} welcomed me as they do every morning. Watched as a newcomer picked up his first 30 day chip and listened as he shared about spending this Thanksgiving sober for the first time in his life. Reflected on all of the men who have gone before me to the big meeting in heaven and what an impact each one of them had in my sober life. Watched and listened as each person called on to share expressed gratitude for what the program has brought them. Was reminded that each day of sobriety is a day of Thanksgiving. Will be reaching out to all family members scattered throughout the country later today to tell them how much I appreciate and love them-and thanks to the program, they will return the favor. Since April 28, 1998, this miracle has been repeating itself, and it never ceases to amaze me how grateful I am today for the life I now have thanks to AA. May each one of you have a day full of joy, happiness, and serenity.
    7 points
  17. I hope that many of you are taking this opportunity to change your home WiFi password to "FuckTrumpInTheGoatass6969" or similar for the day so that visiting Trumpy relatives will have to type that into their phones.
    7 points
  18. I probably have the most drama free thanksgivings possible so I always appreciate this thread. But we did find out this year that my widowed step mother (dad passed away 10 years ago today) is now apparently dating her cousin. So there’s that.
    7 points
  19. You know, this thread used to be my safe space. Since Herman fucked our team, this thread has gone fucking dark. Are we too ashamed with our own fucking shit show to make fun of our inbred cousins down the road anymore? WTF??
    7 points
  20. Just checking, I have been sexually sober for a week. As always, I am powerless over lust and fear. Hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving.
    7 points
  21. Did I say I wasn’t? They can all get bent, that’s exactly what I’m doing. They can forage in the backyard for all I care. I’ve told them I will cook a meal and they can eat what they like. I have nuts and they do not live in my wife’s purse.
    7 points
  22. I'm very glad this man who has had three wives and committed campaign finance violations in the course of paying off a stripper he was rawdogging right around the time his last son was born is talking about God!
    6 points
  23. October 31, 1908 By the President of the United States of America Thanksgiving Proclamation Once again the season is at hand when, according to the ancient custom of our people, it becomes the duty of the President to appoint a day of prayer and of thanksgiving to God. Year by year this Nation grows in strength and worldly power. During the century and a quarter that has elapsed since our entry into the circle of independent peoples we have grown and prospered in material things to a degree never known before, and not now known in any other country. The thirteen colonies which straggled along the seacoast of the Atlantic and were hemmed-in but a few miles west of tidewater by the Indian haunted wilderness, have been transformed into the mightiest republic which the world has ever seen. Its domains stretch across the continent from one to the other of the two greatest oceans, and it exercises dominion alike in the arctic and tropic realms. The growth in wealth and population has surpassed even the growth in territory. Nowhere else in the world is the average of individual comfort and material well-being as high as in our fortunate land. For the very reason that in material well-being we have thus abounded, we owe it to the Almighty to show equal progress in moral and spiritual things. With a nation, as with the individuals who make up a nation, material well-being is an indispensable foundation. But the foundation avails nothing by itself. That life is wasted, and worse than wasted, which is spent in piling, heap upon heap, those things which minister merely to the pleasure of the body and to the power that rests only on wealth. Upon material well-being as a foundation must be raised the structure of the lofty life of the spirit, if this Nation is properly to fulfil its great mission and to accomplish all that we so ardently hope and desire. The things of the body are good; the things of the intellect better; the best of all are the things of the soul; for, in the nation as in the individual, in the long run it is character that counts. Let us, therefore, as a people set our faces resolutely against evil, and with broad charity, with kindliness and good-will toward all men, but with unflinching determination to smite down wrong, strive with all the strength that is given us for righteousness in public and in private life.
    6 points
  24. Are you going to cry in a sports bar after the game?
    6 points
  25. Fucking kill me now. I have not read through the thread recently, so please forgive me if this a repeat of some other poor soul(s). what the fuck is up with all the diet bullshit?!? I just was told 6 extra p pole are coming to dinner. Cool, ok. I wish I’d know sooner but family is family. “Oh wait, your putting butter on your turkey? I can’t do dairy.” “Oh, did you use milk in your cornbread for the dressing? Yeah that’s not going to work I’m doing whole 30.” “I’m only eating carnivor now, and so I brought all the stuff to make my own meat/dairy stuffing dessert and sides from one of meats cheese and pork rinds.” look I’m all for people losing weight, in fact I encourage it, but what the fuck happened to people? How bout not eating 2 desserts after 2 large plates of food. Maybe mix in a walk daily. So tired of all the latest diet bullshit. I need a drink 🥃
    6 points
  26. Hey, Pie Fags! Start your own damn thread, and quit ruining this one with your culinary nonsense. This is a place for hate, shame, and embarassment.
    6 points
  27. last year's coach of the year. i'm sick of hearing excuses why he would never work here. i've watched 50% of this board twist and convulse itself in to rationalizing meyer. so fuck it. Pirate to Texas. fight me. happy thanksgiving.
    5 points
  28. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday too. 4 years ago I was having Thanksgiving with a bunch of bottomed out drunks at La Hacienda. My now wife's family friend Lou drove down and hung out with us (I mean, her, but I was there). In March he was at our wedding and pulled us aside saying how honored he was to have been included and etc etc etc - yeah man, obviously. Which is what I told him. Also apparently 4 years ago there was going to at least be some sort of intervention or intervening going on at Thanksgiving, where it was reliable that I would show up even if I never answered calls or texts or e-mails. That would've put a damper on the holiday, glad i hit bottom before then. I think I missed some shitty UT games too. At any rate, I just now thought "Oh yeah, my shaggy alcoholic friends!". Only at this point in the day because it's a day that I love and being an alcoholic isn't a thing about it one way or the other and it wasn't at the front of my mind to think about people who might not be back in a place where it's just easy. So, I'm thankful for all you guys, I'm thankful for your sobriety, or for the people who read this and haven't taken the plunge or fully admitted it (I know you're there), I'm thankful for your curiosity. I'm thankful for the opportunity that still lives for y'all to enjoy days like today without alcohol or whatever your problem is even being a factor. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
    5 points
  29. If nothing else, can I get another/better shot of Josh Allen’s mom?
    5 points
  30. 5 points
  31. Man, I sure am glad we've been loosening the rules on these facilities that keep catching on fire and fucking up our air.
    5 points
  32. Yeah, yeah, “oh know we suck again” is the theme of this season’s football board, but we do have plenty of things to be thankful for. Our team doesn’t wear maroon and our coach doesn’t have 8 years left on his contract... name something else football related that you’re thankful for. Happy Thanksgiving to all of you and your families!
    4 points
  33. 4 points
  34. There are two different versions. One is made with mint chip ice cream to which other ingredients have been added. The traditional is made with marshmallow creme (either homemade or from a jar), creme de menthe and creme de cacao liquors, and heavy cream. Both pies have an Oreo crumble crust. Green food coloring tints the filling so often this is a spring time pie. Here is the recipe from the Pioneer Woman: https://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/grasshopper-pie/ This is one that uses cream cheese, sweetened condensed milk and Cool Whip. I haven't tried making it that way, because sometimes SCM can make things too sweet and it doesn't have the liquor. https://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/grasshopper-pie/ I have also had a version of grasshopper cheesecake with drizzled chocolate that is pretty tasty.
    4 points
  35. 4 points
  36. I wouldn't use the candidate who listed herself as a minority in her generation's and profession's version of Linked In as the example of someone who understands minority struggles.
    4 points
  37. Especially because Pete has only been out of the closet for four years and spent the formative parts of his education and professional life being seen by the world as a straight white guy. Black Americans don’t have that kind of luxury. When discrimination against his sexuality could have actually hurt him there was nothing for anyone to discriminate against. He was in his second term when he came out FFS. Comparing the black experience to the queer experience or latino experience or the female experience is a folly and never, ever works. But coming from a white dude who only came out after he traded on his whiteness and maleness and after building the foundation of his success is particularly tone deaf.
    4 points
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