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  • Pancho gets pulled over by a Lafayette, LA narcotics officer


    Pancho
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    I got pulled over by a narcotics officer in Lafayette, LA last night as I was driving back to Houston from reffing a basketball game.  The officer (insert bro name here) said I drove on the middle lane lines at least 3ft on both my left and right and that's why he pulled me over.  Now, I can legit believe this because I was definitely on my phone trying to pull up at podcast at that point and was halfway paying attention. 

    He asked to see my license, and of course I already have it on the visor to just easily pull out and make it not look like I'm reaching for something.  He goes back to his car for a good 5 minutes then comes back to ask me to step out of the vehicle.  He starts asking me where I was going and where was I coming from--the usual.  Then he immediately asks do I have any drugs or narcotics in the car.  

    Me: "No sir."

    Narcotics Bro: "You sure?"

    Me: "Yes, I'm sure sir."

    He does the above but asks me about any potential guns in the car or any large sums of cash. 

    Me: "No sir."

    Narcotics Bro: "You sure about that?"

    Me: "Yes sir, no guns, knives, or any weapons. I don't carry cash--cards only."

    At this point, I could tell Narcotics Bro was getting a little edgy because he just knew he caught me in something.  He goes back to his car to do something with my license again (I presume) and this takes a while.  He then comes back to me, and I could tell he thought I was a dumbass. He asks about suitcases in the car (how many), if anyone other than myself packed my bags, or if I had traveled with anyone else on my trip at any point.  The answer was clearly no to all of those questions.

    Narcotics Bro: "Yeah, so your story doesn't quite add up, so I'm going to need to search your vehicle.  Do you mind if I do that?"

    Me: "I don't consent to that, so no you can't search my car."

    Narcotics Bro:  "Is there a reason why you don't want me to search your car?"

    Me: "No, no reason but you don't have a warrant to do that, so no.  And actually I'm getting a little scared here."

    Narcotics Bro: "Why, because you know you have some weed or pills in there?"

    Me: "Nah, I'm scared because I'm Black and you're a White officer and we both know how these situations typically end up."

    Narcotics Bro:  "Dude, I understand.  My body cam is right here, and I have a Black Wife!"

    Me: giphy.gif

    He goes back to his car again for forever while I'm counting semis going by, and he comes back to tell me since I don't agree to a search then the K9 unit will have to be called.  I say gleefully "okay" because I know I don't have jack shit in my car.  I'm in a rental (shoutout Avis) with Georgia plates so I think this didn't help.  He asks to see the agreement and I give it to him.  He looks it over for a few minutes then says "hey, how much did you pay for this rental" and I'm thinking bro, you have the agreement in your fucking hand.  But nonetheless, I blurt out the exact amount.  He looks on the agreement, sees I'm right, and I can see he's getting frustrated.  He later asks why I don't take my own car, which I can assume is just because he's trying to catch me in something to which I response "because it's brand new and I don't want to put the miles on it."

    K9 Asian bro comes, and Cujo is barking like crazy.  He talks with Narcotics Bro for a bit then the search begins.  I see K9 bros face and it looks like "you called me out here for this waste of time shit" type faces.  I'm smiling like a mofo because Narcotics is about to look like a fool.  While Cujo is circling the car, I start to make small talk about the weather, Lafayette eateries, the traffic, and just other bullshit because I know he now knows he's just wasted both of ours time.  3 circles for Cujo, no dice, and back to the unit he goes.  Asian K9 officer with the look of "waste of time" on his face walking back.

    He then says he's just gonna let me go with a warning and that it sounds like I was just tired, something I told him when he first stopped me.  He's had my license the entire time but before he gives it back, he holds it up one last time, shines his flashlight on it and just twists the license in his hand--this goes on for 30 seconds.  I'm sitting here thinking that if my license was fake, you would have seen that 25 minutes ago when you did the exact same thing. He hands it back then suggests I go to the Exxon on the next exit and get a red bull or some bangs (wtf???) to drink so I can wake up a little. 

    Long story short--I'm definitely not traumatized by this situation, but I'm still a little irked that my complete, 100% honest story to him gets a response of basically "I think you're lying so I need to search your car."  I'm damn near 40--I ain't got time to be hauling shitty ass weed across state lines. 

     

    Just wanted to get this off my chest.  It still feels like I dreamt this as I can't believe it happened.  Not sure what to think really. 

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    now you know the actual answer is "because I put miles on the rental and get reimbursed".

    pretty much bullshit and what a fucking waste of everyone's time.  Louisiana gonna Louisiana.  K9 guy must have really been pissed.

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    2 minutes ago, cattail said:

    Almost the same identical thing happened to my black ass few years back in that same area. Has to be a lick for seizing peoples stuff. In my case, the K9 handler blatantly signaled the dog to bark and they dismantled my car on the side of the road.

    Wtf?

    Seats?

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    Are you sure this was Lafayette, La and not Wise County, Tx? Seriously, that sounds exactly like a stop on 287. I bet you passed a plate reader somewhere and that car had been spotted by another reader somewhere along a drug trafficking route. The swerving was just an excuse to stop and search. They don't know the owner, they just know the vehicle history. Vigilant Solutions

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    2 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

    My biggest surprise is that the k9 cop didn’t trigger the dog to respond so they could get in the car. 

    this

    "The dog alerted on your vehicle"
    "I didn't see him do anything"
    "..."

     

    Edited by GringoSalado
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    6 hours ago, cattail said:


    Yup. Was actually terrified they were going to plant something. It was sketchy AF

    That’s the thing that would have freaked me out.  If I was black in Louisiana that is.

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    5 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

    THAT is some major bullshit.  Dumb ass, racist, back water cop.  At least the dog, and his handler were legit.

    I thought for sure the dog was going to "signal" and his shit was going to get tossed. 

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    2 minutes ago, Anastasis said:

    I thought for sure the dog was going to "signal" and his shit was going to get tossed. 

    Hey... mans best friend sometimes comes to the rescue..  and it sounded like the handler was on the up, and up.

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    Glad you didn't get fucked with beyond the guy's idiocy.  Certainly glad nothing physical happened, but the harassment is more than you should ever have had to deal with.

    In the aftermath of the  unrest went down last summer, my view of this  aspect of 'freedom and liberty' changed.  Yes, I was aware of people being arrested for "Driving while being black," but for some reason it just resonated with me in a stronger fashion.  I am also less "pro-police' than I used to be.  There should be  no reason for you as a black man to be fearful or concerned for your safety when you get pulled over.  As a white dude, I'm usually sitting there wondering how much the fine might be or how long this sumbeech is going to waste my time.  Meanwhile, you're truly wondering, "What the fuck is this dude gonna pull.  Am I safe?  Am I getting hauled in for horseshit reasons? "  It could go almost anywhere but good.

    I'm sincerely sorry.  It needs to be corrected.  That is not "and justice for all"

     

    All of that being said, the rental piece would have scared the fuck out of me...  "what if they find something?  I damned sure didn't put it there..."

    Edited by slorch
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    Maybe there’s a new strategy for these guys with body cams to make it real awkward. “I saw how you winked at me before you turned on the camera! You sure do look good in that uniform! Do you think we could get together for a drink after your shift? Are you packing a standard issue 9mm? Nah, I bet you got a .45 magnum!” Please Facebook Live a similar approach bad a research study and report back. 

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    I am reading this thinking wtf. And then I read that Pancho was black and it all made sense. Did not know that. Bullshit. 

    Like someone said above, zero chance that happens to me. I am officially a self-loathing American. This place sucks. 

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    8 hours ago, RPM said:

    Are you sure this was Lafayette, La and not Wise County, Tx? Seriously, that sounds exactly like a stop on 287. I bet you passed a plate reader somewhere and that car had been spotted by another reader somewhere along a drug trafficking route. The swerving was just an excuse to stop and search. They don't know the owner, they just know the vehicle history. Vigilant Solutions

    Had this happen to me twice while working in Illinois, both times in a rental car. Told the guy I was working for to buy an old beater with Illinois plates. Same thing, brought out the K9s. Had the same fear, what if they found something, and it wasn't mine. I mean I looked white trash enough, it was oilfield work.

    CHIEF

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    8 hours ago, RPM said:

    Are you sure this was Lafayette, La and not Wise County, Tx? Seriously, that sounds exactly like a stop on 287. I bet you passed a plate reader somewhere and that car had been spotted by another reader somewhere along a drug trafficking route. The swerving was just an excuse to stop and search. They don't know the owner, they just know the vehicle history. Vigilant Solutions

    I was driving in to Louisiana from Mississippi on HWY 61 and the minute I entered LA on that highway, I noticed 2 high tech cameras in the middle of nowhere on both sides of the highway looking as if they were snapping a pic of the driver and plates.  I immediately thought that was really odd considering there was nothing around. 

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    1 minute ago, Pancho said:

    I was driving in to Louisiana from Mississippi on HWY 61 and the minute I entered LA on that highway, I noticed 2 high tech cameras in the middle of nowhere on both sides of the highway looking as if they were snapping a pic of the driver and plates.  I immediately thought that was really odd considering there was nothing around. 

    Make sure you smile with your eyes next time and none of this will happen.

    j/k this is fucking bullshit. 

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    1 minute ago, Pancho said:

    I was driving in to Louisiana from Mississippi on HWY 61 and the minute I entered LA on that highway, I noticed 2 high tech cameras in the middle of nowhere on both sides of the highway looking as if they were snapping a pic of the driver and plates.  I immediately thought that was really odd considering there was nothing around. 

    I flew into Indianapolis and would drive over to Illinois, and worked up and down the Wabash river on both sides. So I crossed into both states several times per day. The speed limit was 50 mph on the Illinois side, even on major highways, so both stops were for speeding. The plates weren't always Indiana or Illinois on the rentals. One time I got one with New York plates. There is some sinister surveillance going on.

    CHIEF

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    7 minutes ago, Baboontyme said:

    I am reading this thinking wtf. And then I read that Pancho was black and it all made sense. Did not know that. Bullshit. 

    Like someone said above, zero chance that happens to me. I am officially a self-loathing American. This place sucks. 

    This shit happens to white people in Iowa all the time, but that's only because there are so few black folks.  The few black folks here get fucked with plenty.  I remember one time we were driving from Des Moines to Iowa City for the Iowa/Iowa State game.  We were trying to decide who was going to drive, and my one buddy (black dude) offered to do it, but put out the caveat "it's going to take us longer, because if I drive 1 MPH over the speed limit, we're going to get pulled over.  You guys can get away with 10 over."  And he was right, so I drove.

    Sucks that you had to go through this Pancho.  Predictable bullshit.  Glad that nothing serious happened.

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    Pancho handled the stop like a pro.

    Since it's Shut The Fuck Up Friday, I suggest everyone watch one the the Pot Brothers at Law videos.

     

    Edited by Jerry Callo
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    i dont always see eye to eye with you Pancho... but like Slorch said, in that situation  I am just pissed off that this asshole is pulling me over, and wondering how much my fine is gonna be and "goodbye" to 45 mins of my life.

    you having to worry every second of that encounter about making a weird move, or if someone had used the rental before to take shit back and forth and just concerned that the cop would flat out lie is very stressing to my white ass.

    glad it was just a waste of an hour of your day and nothing else, and good job on telling the cop no to the search.

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    18 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

    Louisiana sounds like it sucks.

    I could do without Louisiana. Just make sure someone catalogs all the recipes for the rest of us before they all sink into the swamp. 

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    Cop: "Son, do you know why I'm stopping you for?"
    Pancho: 'Cause I'm young and I'm black and my hat's real low? Do I look like a mind reader, sir? I don't know. Am I under arrest or should I guess some more?
    Cop: "Well, you was doing 55 in a 54.  License and registration and step out of the car.  Are you carrying a weapon on you? I know a lot of you are"
    Pancho:  I ain't steppin' out of shit, all my paper's legit
    Cop:  "Well, do you mind if I look around the car a little bit?"
    Pancho:  Well, my glove compartment is locked, so is the trunk in the back.  And I know my rights, so you gon' need a warrant for that
    Cop:  "Aren't you sharp as a tack? You some type of lawyer or something? Somebody important or something?"
    Pancho: Well, I ain't passed the bar, but I know a little bit. Enough that you won't illegally search my shit
    Cop: "Well, we'll see how smart you are when the K9 come!"
    Pancho:  I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one – hit me

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    10 hours ago, Pancho said:

    Just wanted to get this off my chest.  It still feels like I dreamt this as I can't believe it happened.  Not sure what to think really. 

    That you should've been ticketed for fucking around with your phone and swerving on the road

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