Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Featured Replies

the entire steel industry’s gay.  aerospace, too, and the railroads. 

  • Replies 91.2k
  • Views 9.6m
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

Posted Images

Prediction: "who cares what Woodward thinks, Woodward gets too much credit for the hires, that was an A&M thing (it was A&M's leadership and culture and resources and the sleeping giant opportunity that attracted Fisher and Williams, not Woodward) more than anything he did, I hope he enjoys losing to us every year!, it was a desperation move on LSU's part to try to thwart the mighty championship momentum of Texas A&M but it won't matter"

I’ve already seen this almost word for word on another forum
4 hours ago, Cairn Horn88 said:

I attended an after-wedding dinner of one of my good friend's daughters at the Driskill a few years ago.  She was an aggy grad and her friends got their aggy shenanigans going and the whooping, hollering, etc took off.   My friend and I are both UT grads and he fully understood when I excused myself to go take a dump.

I've heard of this crap happening at aggy wedding receptions, but fortunately never witnessed it. But this post got me curious to search YouTube for "aggie wedding" (apologies to Phlegm for misspelling). JFC!

blj_20110103-008-374x500.jpg

Is it not true that most manual laborers are latent homosexuals? NTTAWWT.

I googled a series of videos of Harv and Heather the heifer Willis’ Aggie wedding.  Looked like a SNL/Onion production.

the entire steel industry’s gay.  aerospace, too, and the railroads. 
Kiss my ass. I supply each of those industries product. I love my wife. No, really.
"Kiss my ass. I supply each of those industries product. I love my wife. No, really."
Supply them with Astro lube for the first year, then its poly grip?
 
On 4/23/2019 at 6:27 PM, GhostOfTomJoad said:

Yet another aggy in the wild embarrassing themselves story:

My company had the honor today of hosting a team from NASA and the ISS for a presentation on collaborative opportunities in space. The keynote presenter was a NASA astronaut who flew on 3 shuttle missions including 2 deployments to the ISS. She logged over 42 days in space. She's a certified bad-ass by any unit of measurement, and a Texas Ex to boot.

During the Q&A one of the questions from the audience was to ask her to describe her most thrilling moment as an astronaut. Now, ramjet can attest to this better than most, but being an astronaut doesn't equate to being a great or inspiring public speaker. Her engineering principles were on full display. She was calculated, precise...anything but boastful (almost to her detriment; the audience wants to be wowed by tales of what they'll never experience). But  she did her best to describe the immense power of the 8 1/2 minute launch, the beauty of seeing the aurora borealis plus massive weather patterns on earth from space,, etc. She also talked about how one of the most memorable and cool things she saw was the view from the shuttle each time (she was on the Discovery all 3 missions) upon re-entry when (I'm gonna fuck up the particulars) the plasma super heated and a brilliant--in her words--"burnt orange glow encased the vehicle. As a Longhorn I thought that was really cool."

The audience here in Austin politely chuckled/applauded as you'd expect. Except for the dumb fuck, twenty something aggy who waited until the crowd noise subsided to let out a 5 second long "hisssssssssss."  Heads snapped around to find this douche who, when he realized he was being stared down, lifted his right hand with a feeble gig em sign.

This dipshit is two years or less into his career & he thinks the appropriate thing to do in a public event (we were also streaming it globally) is to hiss at an astronaut and PhD in engineering? What the fuck is wrong with these idiots?

you were too kind to the aggy to leave out the fact that the female astronaut was also an african american.  /triggered

On 4/23/2019 at 9:23 PM, markstanco said:

Check out @BonnCade’s Tweet:

 


What does 'rough stuff real tuff" mean?

 

Going in dry on a very old sheep.

16 hours ago, MrPhlegm said:

It means this...

8f45405d137c04a1cf71f2df680502c1.gif3ad4cb82c43a8f7ffc52b13d68a299f2.jpg5415675f6a08540e2a0eea937854717e.giff3c1effd7a5b2340028b90cada34f94d.giff53fda3d0ddc0c35b204936e3345c40c.jpgc2b02eb3ae53a8a4b5639a89e0472111.jpgb9dfa40ff727a84729fb22971a3e3ac5.jpg27aaf7ceb9b656c3d84cc6fa72156711.gife1f42c1e4cf5b578e9afd30659342549.jpg537dde23e63de5e288c8d31e61e66b66.giffcb579f9592c5e585eb5dc6d62b39e3f.jpgce68c03b03067c4a543b94e70de71225.giffc88b469dcdb8da91f912ea13a419768.jpg848c55c0c008b8dc688ec036c40154f8.jpga7c31245e3c1a72f7d09362fbd0ac085.jpg7cf1592e8d5c30926f6999ef9169660f.jpg6765a4bdd633b1a3ce21954e8fabf71d.jpg40f21d9bad95fe44347d3b5b6422d5f6.jpg

Ruff tuff reel stuf, duh stupid sip.

Phlegm pretty much covered it here...

On 4/1/2019 at 12:34 PM, C-Man said:

giphy.gif

I was setting lines and fishing on the Colorado river last weekend and our pump went out on our perch and they all died.  We go to this fish farm not far away.  One dude there goes nice shirt (I’m wearing a UT fishing shirt) other guy yea me too.  aggie that runs the place chimes in with yea but we are sec now.....   I said so finishing 5th every year in the sec is a good thing?   No response....

10 hours ago, Jkwellborn said:


I’ve already seen this almost word for word on another forum

I believe it. I enjoy writing Aggie parody posts but it doesn't take a lot of insight to do it. They're all completely fucking predictable.

8 hours ago, markstanco said:

I supply each of those industries product.

I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed.

4 hours ago, Hook1997 said:

I was setting lines and fishing on the Colorado river last weekend and our pump went out on our perch and they all died.  We go to this fish farm not far away.  One dude there goes nice shirt (I’m wearing a UT fishing shirt) other guy yea me too.  aggie that runs the place chimes in with yea but we are sec now.....   I said so finishing 5th every year in the sec is a good thing?   No response....

Fish camp to fish farm. aggy doesn't stray far.

7 hours ago, Hagbard Celine said:

1...

Rita’s dirtbag dad started banging her when she was 13 or 14. Poor gal was messed up in the head and eventually died of ALS.

6 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Phlegm pretty much covered it here...

Except he left out the old aggy caught on camera picking his nose & eating it during the Alamo Bowl.

15 hours ago, Cairn Horn88 said:

I attended an after-wedding dinner of one of my good friend's daughters at the Driskill a few years ago.  She was an aggy grad and her friends got their aggy shenanigans going and the whooping, hollering, etc took off.   My friend and I are both UT grads and he fully understood when I excused myself to go take a dump.

Kind of a related to aggy weddings.   My wife and I were up in San Antonio a few weekends ago and we were walking around the Alamo area on Saturday morning  and we saw a group of aggy Corp of Cadets lined up with their swords and boots .   We were like,  OK there must be some sort of aggy VIP in town or big aggy event and they are putting on a show for the public who are unfamiliar with their cult like traditions.   So we keep on walking and then turn around and all the sudden a bunch of whooping and all the jazz started and it turns out all ceremony in front of the Alamo was just one of their fellow Cadets asking his gal to marry him......     I was thinking, Ok whatever.   I wonder what some of the tourists from out of the state or country who are totally unfamiliar with aggy thought about it?

They probably understood why Santa Anna won the Alamo.

12 hours ago, Born Burnt said:

I've heard of this crap happening at aggy wedding receptions, but fortunately never witnessed it. But this post got me curious to search YouTube for "aggie wedding" (apologies to Phlegm for misspelling). JFC!

blj_20110103-008-374x500.jpg

I witnessed the whooping thing at a cousin's funeral. His son was a corp turd who had some of his fellow turds come to the funeral in full regalia. One point they all did the whooping thing and I was really tempted to go pull the AR-15 out of the truck and have a duck shoot. They're disgusting subhuman pieces of s*** and not a drop more.

1 hour ago, Armybrat said:

Except he left out the old aggy caught on camera picking his nose & eating it during the Alamo Bowl.

That's a well-known technique among veterinarians, it's not "eating" per se, it's more akin to "testing". 

Coulda been worse, coulda had his arm up a cow's ass...

44 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

I witnessed the whooping thing at a cousin's funeral. His son was a corp turd who had some of his fellow turds come to the funeral in full regalia. One point they all did the whooping thing and I was really tempted to go pull the AR-15 out of the truck and have a duck shoot. They're disgusting subhuman pieces of s*** and not a drop more.

smhp.gif

  • Author
the entire steel industry’s gay.  aerospace, too, and the railroads. 
02f0f0b71befa98088c77bfc2064b4e3.jpg
  • Author
Kiss my ass. I supply each of those industries product. I love my wife. No, really.
"Kiss my ass. I supply each of those industries product. I love my wife. No, really." Supply them with Astro lube for the first year, then its poly grip?  
You just "whooshed" me there.
Wooshed?

1efecd28b5a37f5fd9d5e1446acd9c32.gif01e002fcd4d0b6fdf35d5f339c11b35d.jpg
  • Author
I believe it. I enjoy writing Aggie parody posts but it doesn't take a lot of insight to do it. They're all completely fucking predictable.
My guess after reading some is that fucking has absolutely nothing to do with it.

And why would anyone think there is a need to write any since aggy already produces enough anyway.

Writing aggy parody is like wanking to clips of jar jar binks using prepooration h as lube.

5237ca3cf997049a536cfbc5e2f99d56.jpg



20 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:

Dad, why did you take me to a gay steel mill???

I don’t know!

3 hours ago, MrPhlegm said:

Meanwhile

Greta Garbo's tits!

64b8c2d7a877f708e66a9aa40164e354.gif887c01e7ef8ad0d2861f2ed7f1aa8d48.gif333eb136fbb65763eaa306b3e9f8cec3.gif49b1e726e0543bbf4e51adc64bdd4ce0.gif

I'd pay to see Greta Garbo's Tits - has to be a damn fine band, name like that...

16 hours ago, Tex Long said:

Is it not true that most manual laborers are latent homosexuals? NTTAWWT.

I don't know about that, but I can verify that they are latent dumbasses, or at least most are.

13 minutes ago, UTEX_ME said:

 

 

So... latent manual laborer? NTTAWWT

7 minutes ago, Machinator said:

 

But an aggy [Phlegm-approved spelling] does not lie, cheat or steal or tolerate those who do.  How can this be? 

Surprised aggy had a Muslim on their staff.

5 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

I witnessed the whooping thing at a cousin's funeral. His son was a corp turd who had some of his fellow turds come to the funeral in full regalia. One point they all did the whooping thing and I was really tempted to go pull the AR-15 out of the truck and have a duck shoot. They're disgusting subhuman pieces of s*** and not a drop more.

I've come to learn that aggy is just a cumberground.....really.

  • Author
Phlegm...why you got big stack of sticks pointed at the guy's asshole above it?
Because

Turdition!

46791b8bebe7f49769b7814777012114.jpg
  • Author
But an aggy [Phlegm-approved spelling] does not lie, cheat or steal or tolerate those who do.  How can this be? 
Panda bears!

Motherfucking panda bears!

9c3ba7a400f9387c45f97dc7bc53f949.jpg
On 4/23/2019 at 7:02 PM, UTEX90 said:

I am really fucking sick of this becoming more and more common.  It has been atrocious since 2012.  I see it several mutlti-alumni events including fundraisers and charity banquets which I think is bullshit but I wouldn't put up with that for one second in a work environment.

It’s ritating when it occurs, but I actually appreciate it long run. It helps quickly identify morons and people who won’t make it long term in the professional service industries.

That way we can separate them from high performers and eventually force them out via quitting or termination.

2 hours ago, Carl Spackler said:

But an aggy [Phlegm-approved spelling] does not lie, cheat or steal or tolerate those who do.  How can this be? 

They don't tolorate others who do it. It's okay for them to do it. 

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.