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  1. jimmyjazz

    jimmyjazz

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    Johnny Sack

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    Brisketexan

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    crash_davis

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Showing content with the highest reputation on 11/14/19 in Posts

  1. Well, the problem there, and I admit it's a rather arcane point of law, but anyway, the problem there is that she would have had to commit a crime.
    21 points
  2. Joel Klatt is the best color guy in CFB and I don't even have a nomination for second place. He's been great on the air for a while, and he's excellent on social media and in interviews as well. That all said, I'd happily fight you. Not because of your Joel Klatt take. Mostly just because I'd have a chance of biting your typing fingers off, or maiming them in a such a way that your return to this board would be impossible, making the entire site better overnight.
    15 points
  3. 14 points
  4. Humility? Learn it? Look in the mirror dipshit. I'd say act like you've been there before, but the reality is that you barely have been so it makes sense that you'd behave this way. You're strutting around like you've accomplished something. You've won exactly dick so far and you want to talk about humility? Congrats on beating Bama for the first time in a fucking decade - seems to me that the last time you beat them in the regular season didn't make a shit either, so you might want to slow your roll just a bit and see if you can actually seal the deal. You have 1 top 5 finish in the past decade. Fucking one. And you are here beating your chest like you are Bama, or Clemson, or even Ohio State. Hell Auburn has a more recent national championship than you guys. You are having a great year. Yay. Despite countless NFL guys rolling through your roster over the past 10 years and never-ending top 5 recruiting classes you've been painfully average and underperformed your rankings every year, finishing most seasons ranked between 15-20 all while you've watched Bama do all the heavy lifting. Yes, you beat us by 7. Amazing. We stand in awe. Is that better? Is that what you want? Look, ask anyone here - Texas is pretty fucking average and most of our fans want some or all of the coaching staff fired. Yet, we were 1 dropped wide open TD pass from tying you during your "remakable run".Think about that, this is a low spot for us, the midst of a rebuild and LSU is one dropped pass better than our rebuilding team. If you're looking for genuflecting you should go post on TexAgs because aggy is much more likely to be amiable to that kind of shit. Of course, you probably can't because aggy has scoreboard on your right now... how fucking humiliating. If you want to talk about humiliation you should first wash the stink of losing to fucking aggy off before you try and make your point. Humility? Hubris? Systemic? Ingrained? No one here is happy with where we are right now (though some of use are happy with our trajectory) but you might want to self-analyze because the talent you've had has led to fuckall for results. From 2012 to 2018 here are your final season rankings :: 13 14 UR 16 13 18 6 Humility. Learn it.
    10 points
  5. My sis, lives in NYC and is a crazy psycho liberal, practices seagull management during the holidays. Flies in, shits all over everything, then bails leaving us to deal with the mess. She hates my stepmother with every ounce of her soul and stepmom's unwavering support of Trump has only exacerbated the feelings. Last year, she brought her dog that shits and pisses on everything to my Dad and stepmom’s house. Stepmom had just spent a considerable sum of money redoing large portions of the house. At some point, my sister is out shopping or something and my stepmom locked the dog in a room to avoid having the dog shit and piss all over her house (sidenote, Stepmom has a yip dog that shits and pisses all over their house). Sister’s dog goes apeshit being locked up and claws/scratches/bites up 2 brand new doors, completely ruining them. Meltdown ensues by both parties where various insults are thrown and ends with my mother in law forcing my dad to give my sister a bill for about $7k to fix the doors and my sister telling my dad his wife is a cunt and he should divorce her even though they’ve been married for 30 years. Nobody has spoken in a year but sis is coming back this year with the dog. Can’t wait. Thanksgiving!
    10 points
  6. Some of the content that gets posted on here really demonstrates which posters don't work in an open plan office.
    9 points
  7. I hope Rudy's "health insurance" has better coverage than his dental.
    9 points
  8. Sounds like the most useless invention ever
    9 points
  9. Okay, so you're going with the Graham defense. That it's okay if Trump breaks any laws because he's just dumb and we should all just move on? A defense which entirely ignores the damage and erosion of trust towards the U.S. and our foreign policy in the future regardless of if it's successful now? That it wouldn't have worked -- something you have no idea about because if not for the whistle blower, we might be having a different conversation today with the country focused entirely on a Biden conspiracy. What would Trump actually have to do for you to finally give in and believe he should be held accountable for his actions? I hope you realize the precedent the GOP is setting for the country about presidents being completely above accountability and the law. Because the next one that tries to pull Trump's nonsense likely will not be as dumb and inexperienced, and it very well may be a Democrat instead of a Republican. And then while you're pulling your hair out asking how such obvious corruption and attempts to dismantle our democracy can go unchecked, you can think back to today when you and the entire GOP decided to be cowards rather than patriots more concerned with protecting your party's leader than your country. And @Incredulity still has not answered this very simple question. Without deflecting about whether or not it will matter or where the votes will fall, does Trump DESERVE to be impeached? It's a yes or no question.
    9 points
  10. Stop being a pussy. You should learn from Courage Wolf in terms of workplace decorum.
    8 points
  11. https://www.npr.org/2018/03/15/593831564/the-disconnect-between-perceived-danger-in-u-s-schools-and-reality
    8 points
  12. Don't worry about it. Impotence happens to some men at your age.
    7 points
  13. What you fail to comprehend is that none of that evidence would be admissible because it is circumstantial.
    7 points
  14. It's about the rate. You are using raw numbers. There are a lot more kids in school than there were 25-30 years ago. The odds of being the victim of a school shooting are very, very low. Lower than they were when I went to school (just like the gun homicide rate in the US has dropped to about what half it was when I was a kid). I worry a lot more about kids getting killed from commuting or walking to and from school.
    7 points
  15. No argument here. Joel Klatt has been the best analyst in college football for a while now.
    7 points
  16. I have heard that Joel Klatt did not kill any hookers. None at all.
    7 points
  17. Don’t talk to us, we’re trying to watch our stories.
    7 points
  18. Not sure why y'all engage. I had a whole response typed out and then thought better of it. You may as well be presenting facts to a brick wall.
    7 points
  19. Stupid shit your wife said thread is that way ---------> J/K...kinda
    7 points
  20. Got hot at league play at dart bowl tonight and bowled a personal best game (241) and series (655). Went home to celebrate with a leftover meatball in a hot dog bun thrown under a broiler with some string cheese and some pickled japs. Wild turkey 101 chaser.
    7 points
  21. Fuck you. I have an aneurism now.
    7 points
  22. My teenager dropped that line on me several times last week. I told him "Gen-X not boomer!" to which he replied, "Ok, Boomer." Finally I texted him, "Do you want to know how I impregnated your mom with you?" I haven't heard "Ok, Boomer" since.
    7 points
  23. are you talking about number of incidents, or number of deaths? because it is important. (just kidding, it's not important at all. you are wrong by every conceivable measure. https://www.chds.us/ssdb/category/shooting-incidents/ )
    6 points
  24. Downside to a divorce is a smaller house. Upside, I can make it exactly the way I want.
    6 points
  25. You mean there hasn’t been death sensationalized by the media in a while. Since the last multiple casualty school shooting there have been dozens and dozens of dead kids in our inner cities from gang violence, hundreds of people dead from overdoses of fentanyl laced drugs and a lot of suicides. But let’s shake our collective surly fists at the sky about the school shootings and wax poetic about we ain’t doing enough about these ad revenue news cycle stories that scare us. Yes, these school events have no place in our society but our society has some deep sickness that claims exponentially more humans and that sickness doesn’t get the 4 page CR’ish discussion.
    6 points
  26. I’m going to make the assumption that I speak for the entire board when I say, we don’t give a shit what you have to say. EVER.
    6 points
  27. Remember when Ema claimed circumstantial evidence wasn’t admissible in court? That’s who you’re arguing with about first hand knowledge. Lost cause.
    6 points
  28. he President of the United States in the name of The Congress takes pleasure in presenting the MEDAL OF HONOR to SERGEANT JOHN “MANILLA JOHN” BASILONE MARINE CORPS for service as set forth in the following CITATION: For The President of the United States of America, in the name of Congress, takes pleasure in presenting the Medal of Honor to Sergeant John Manila John” Basilone (MCSN: 287506), United States Marine Corps, for extraordinary heroism and conspicuous gallantry in action against enemy Japanese forces, above and beyond the call of duty, while serving with the First Battalion, Seventh Marines, FIRST Marine Division in the Lunga Area. Guadalcanal, Solomon Islands, on the night of 24 – 25 October 1942. While the enemy was hammering at the Marines’ defensive positions, Sergeant Basilone, in charge of two sections of heavy machineguns, fought valiantly to check the savage and determined assault. In a fierce frontal attack with the Japanese blasting his guns with grenades and mortar fire, one of Sergeant Basilone’s sections, with its guncrews, was put out of action, leaving only two men able to carry on. Moving an extra gun into position, he placed it in action, then, under continual fire, repaired another and personally manned it, gallantly holding his line until replacements arrived. A little later, with ammunition critically low and the supply lines cut off, Sergeant Basilone, at great risk of his life and in the face of continued enemy attack, battled his way through hostile lines with urgently needed shells for his gunners, thereby contributing in large measure to the virtual annihilation of a Japanese regiment. His great personal valor and courageous initiative were in keeping with the highest traditions of the U.S. Naval Service.
    5 points
  29. can a geneticist explain to me how russia/eastern europe consistently produces some of the ugliest men on the planet and the hottest women on the planet? that doesn't make any sense to me.
    5 points
  30. I actually agree with your larger point, but still find it funny that your colleagues are totally fine with you browsing through tweets and videos of high school football players during work, but this is crossing the line.
    5 points
  31. Sure. But the difference is that Klatt actually knows how to use logic and reason in his arguments. Finebaum and Herbstreit's arguments often come down to, "because SEC...." I literally heard Herbstreit say on College Game Day last week that Alabama would "still be one of the four best teams in the country even if they lost every game." His reasoning was "because of the NFL talent", which is a patently absurd argument. Obviously he was taking it to the extreme, but that mentality is rampant at ESPN. Klatt calling out the CFP's ridiculously subjective process for ranking the teams each week deserves to be called out for the ridiculousness that it is. Outside of when there is a painfully obvious #1 team, it's just 10 old guys in a room picking teams based on brands and "eye test." The fact that you have two undefeated power 5 teams ranked behind multiple 1-loss power five teams is fucking absurd, especially when one of those two (Minnesota) has the second-best win in the entire field. And you can't tell me for one fucking second that Baylor would be ranked as low as they are if either OU or Texas had their exact record and exact results. Good for Klatt for pointing out the absurdity of it all.
    5 points
  32. We've spent years telling "mainstream" Republicans that if they keep going back to that racism well they were going to hit a big fucking pool of antisemitism, and their response was always "I don't have a racist bone in my body I just support stronger borders and you'd call anyone you disagree with a nazi! I LOVE ISRAEL ISRAEL IS MY HOMEBOY HOW CAN I POSSIBLY BE DOING ANTISEMITISM!?" It feels kind of rewarding to be proven right by history.
    5 points
  33. Schools are safer than they were 30 years ago. There is just a lot more media coverage plus social media now.
    5 points
  34. Oh, I guess we should just ignore this then. All of your examples are things that people brought upon themselves. Even gang violence generally is taking place among people who are voluntarily putting themselves in that position. These kids were just going to school.
    5 points
  35. When Klatt came onto the scene as an announcer, he caught my ear right away. In one of his first games he was breaking down in great detail some of the intricacies of qb throwing mechanics, it was shit I had never heard on a broadcast before. I immediately looked up who the hell was broadcasting this game, and it was Klatt. Football announcers should be there to make you smarter about football. Joel Klatt makes you smarter about football.
    5 points
  36. I suggest you look back fondly at your t-ball days, and then take your own advice.
    5 points
  37. Yes, all you need to be a member is a tiki torch and to recite the purity oath to the tune of the alphabet song. And watch and contribute your money to the far-right YouTube intelligentsia. Imagine being in your mid-thirties and obediently showing up to a college campus to spring surprise questions on one internet grifter because another internet grifter told you to do it. Imagine living in a political era where you inadvertently learned what a "groyper" is because their numbers became somewhat substantial during the dumbest time in American politics. The interesting Venn overlap here are people who are content with Israel as an important ally due to a rational grasp of history, fundamentalist war mongers who want to use Israel as a prop to fully intervene in every middle eastern skirmish so weapons contractors and seedy private security firms can have literal orgies, and Nazi kids living in gated communities. Slobs like Bannon and Miller and Alex Jones type rubes have courted these ghouls toward the mainstream GOP when they watched their numbers increase because they simply couldn't handle a black guy being president. Now they're in the tent and shitting in the food supply. And it all derives from intellectual voids that range from internet/YouTube racist extremist too repugnant and vile to keep any social media accounts active to internet/YouTube racist extremist just repugnant and vile enough to push the same message but also just presentable enough to contribute to Fox News with Laura Ingraham and Tucker Carlson. What's fascinating and hilarious to me is that they don't know how to handle each other. If someone says "man, I don't think Israeli snipers should shoot Pakistani children protesting 300 yards away," they'll call you a full-blown Anti-Semite. If someone said "of course we should support and protect Israel based on the last century of American history" they'll call that person a betrayer of their race and faith. You have one side of this populist conservative movement who are, without any sense of irony, confused at the oldest kind of repulsive ignorance being spewed by the irrational and nonyielding white supremacists they invited over. One of the million examples of the conversations these idiots have forced themselves to have with other idiots: Matt Walsh, who prefers to speak about his hatred of just gay people, now has to juggle his isolated hatred with a distinct group of people who hate him for not hating their broader but also isolated hatred of other people they feel he's failing to appropriately hate. They hate each other for not hating the thing they consider the most important thing to currently hate. This is the idiot stew that is boiling in the basement of the mainstream GOP and they're going to have to eventually address it. And I get to laugh the entire time.
    5 points
  38. This Joel Klatt? He can thank Kelson for knocking some sense into him.
    5 points
  39. BREAKING: Epstein Island sold to wealthy Middle Eastern businessman Haadid Nahkil Muhssef 2 days ago GENESIUS TIMES: Exavier Saskagoochie
    5 points
  40. As if Somali pirates weren't bad enough, now we got tamale pirates?
    5 points
  41. Wife noticed this morning that we have forgotten to run the dishwasher two nights in a row. Me: "Fine, just start it now." Her: "But we're about to go to work." Me: "So, the dishwasher doesn't need us here to run." Her: "But what if it leaks?" Me: "We've run this dishwasher 100 times and it has never leaked. Why would you assume it's going to leak now?" Her: "You of all people who is an expert in probability should realize that the past doesn't predict the future!" (Yes, I swear she said that.) Me: "Why the hell do you do this kind of shit where you conjure up horrible outcomes and use them to base your decision on?" (I actually know the answer to that -- it's because her mother does the exact same thing.) Her: "Are you telling me that there's no chance the dishwater is going to leak?" Me: "Well, there's also a chance this refrigerator is going to explode, so I guess we should unplug it every time we leave the house?" Her: "Now you're just being ridiculous."
    5 points
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