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Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation on 11/18/21 in all areas

  1. After reading, it is apparent that I am either related to several of you fuckers, or we are all living in some sort of parallel universe. I start my holiday story with only the following as a guide... My Grandmother, God rest her soul, had 4 children. Two boys and two girls whom she name Sherry, Jerry, Garry and Larry. Here is a brief description of each of those individuals. Sherry - Her and her husband are religous freaks, and the parents of twin girls and a very gay son. The girls have each been married 3+ times, have rarely been able to hold down jobs, and each have multiple baby daddies, but they do no wrong in their parents eyes. The son, due to his sexuality, is never spoken to or about, as if he doesn't really exist. Jerry - My mother. Married/Divorced 5 times. Unemployed for the last 20 years of her life, which she spent living with my Grandmother and Garry. She passed away this year, about 3 weeks after my grandmother passed. Garry - Raging redneck alcoholic, supreme racist and unashamed homophobe. He too has been unemployed for the better part of 20 years and lived with my mother and grandmother in her trailer. The same trailer which he burned down only 2 weeks after her death, due to smoking in bed. He now lives in a 5th wheel travel trailer on Sherry's property. He received $30,000 in insurance money for the burned trailer. Spent 20K on the trailer and the rest on "primo weed". Larry - Chain smoking cardiac patient with severe COPD. Removes his oxygen mask to smoke another unfiltered camel. The outcast of the family, only comes around for these festive holiday times. other attendees The Grandchildren - Sherry's kids -Twin sisters, both pushing 3 bills and each on husbands number 3, and their gay brother and his partner. My wife and I. I am the only college educated professional person in the family. We will fly into town, rent a car and stay in a hotel. We will each be subjected to countless stares and questions about our personal finances. We are generally looked down upon, because we have been successful. My brother.....40 years old with wife and two kids. He has had at least 30 jobs prior to landing his dream gig as a Budweiser delivery person. Gary's Kids - 1 girl and two boys, all grown. The youngest just finished a 10 year turn for meth possession/distribution. Traditional Thanksgiving dinner, served buffet style on paper plates, Budweiser, sweet tea and boxed wine to drink, followed by yelling at the TV for the entire Cowboy game. By halftime, most will be drunk or pissed off, several will have stormed out and headed home and my wife and I will be smelling of second hand smoke, and swearing this is the last year we attend. Its a family tradition.
    36 points
  2. If that’s my daughter there’s a dead mother fucker found decapitated in a dumpster. Film at 11
    14 points
  3. Based on the 80-something movies in their extensive library, here's a surefire method for success that will take you from "Lonely Guy On The Couch" to doing the hibbidy dibbidy in just six short weeks: 1. Quit your job in the big city and return home between Halloween and Thanksgiving to some rustic setting with an idyllic name like “Angel Falls” or “Piney Acres.” 2. Find a former high school girlfriend who has just been widowed. Expect her to have two children between the ages of 5 and 8. 3. Bump into her at the small town’s outdoor farmers' market. Expect her to be firmly in the camp of “never going to fall in love again” when you first reconnect. Plan the platonic catch-up for coffee. 4. Accept the platonic catch-up for coffee. Get a phone call five minutes into. Apologize that you have to leave immediately on a family emergency but ask if you can reschedule for a dinner. 5. Meet for dinner at her house. Help male child with homework in subject he is having trouble with or female child with sports skill. Enjoy salad and pasta. Don’t ask why kids inexplicably go to bed at 7 p.m. Look at old high school yearbook after dinner, then excuse yourself before things heat up. 6. Ghost her for a week or two. Bump into her again at the grocery store as you’re struggling to make Thanksgiving dinner. 7. Reluctantly accept invitation to her house for Thanksgiving since it will be her family’s first since her spouse passed. 8. Continue to express interest in male child’s academic struggles and/or female child’s athletic activity. Offer to attend school performance/game on Friday night. 9. Finally – The Big Day…. Be available to hang Christmas lights on the roof (he always did that) on Saturday afternoon. As the sun sinks in the West and the snow begins to fall, go Christmas Tree shopping. 10. Welcome to Bone Town, population You.
    13 points
  4. At my local pub having a beer. Small talking the bartender, I asked her what she was doing for Thanksgiving next week. "If my boyfriend doesn't at least order a pizza and eat my pussy before I work a 5 to close I'm going to cut his balls off."
    11 points
  5. Bari Weiss sums it up: "To acknowledge the facts of what happened that night is not political. It is simply to acknowledge reality. It is to say that facts are still facts and that lies are lies. It is to insist that mob justice is not justice. It is to say that media consensus is not the equivalent of due process. And that pretending otherwise for the sake of political expediency is why the National Guard is now standing watch in Kenosha, bracing for violence once again in the anticipation of a verdict that for many, has already been decided."
    11 points
  6. 1. Denial. Denial is the initial stage of grief that occurs when a Longhorn football coach proves to be an incompetent loser. A defense mechanism, the denial stage may last months or years. In this stage, you refuse to believe that the Savior of the Program is, in fact, a flawed person whose track record as a coach and a human being was littered with red flags from the beginning. It can't be Coach's fault! He's The One! Coach is going to Bring Texas Back. I've never been so sure of anything in my life. He just needs a few things. Like new players. 85 of them, to be exact. Each of our current players is a talentless fraud. Every recruiting service, high school coach, and rival program uniformly overrates recruits that will eventually commit to Texas by an average of 4.5 stars. That. Is. A. Fact. And we need to fix the culture of the program for him. Our program culture is rotten. All of it! Except for the team colors, of course. And the logo. And the fight song, the school song, the various gameday traditions, the rivalries, the cheerleaders, the pom girls, the cannon, the trademark hand sign, the live mascot, and the inordinate devotion of resources to a sport at the expense of educational investment. And of course Coach himself and anything Coach does that can be considered cultural. All of that stuff can stay. But everything else about our culture is 100% rotten and has to go. And don't get me started on the city of Austin. It's too weird, there are too many distractions, alcohol and drugs are sold within its confines, temptresses reside here, there's traffic, that one guy was throwing bricks at people on I-35 for a while a couple years ago, a monocled cobra died crossing the street here, etc., etc. If only we replaced the whole roster, the entire culture of our program except for pretty much everything that makes up that culture, and the surrounding city of nearly 1 million people, then Coach would finally have the basic components he needs to win football games here! 2. Anger. After a year or two of denial, you become angry. The results have not changed. COACH MUST GO! It's all his fault! It's always been his fault! These scoundrels arguing on-line that it's the players or the culture or OUR BEAUTIFUL CITY OF AUSTIN for Christ's sake are sinister agents of pro-Coach propaganda and always have been. How can they not recognize the obvious truth staring them squarely in the face? A truth I have always known because I am consistent and objective and hope that none of you are proficient in this message board's search feature. (Note that the Anger stage includes a sub-stage: "Denial that you were ever in denial.") 3. Bargaining. When the anger subsides, you coolly begin to seek ways to bargain the program out of the mess Coach created. Hey guys: Urban Meyer is available! Jon Gruden, too. What's the buyout? $34 million? That's pocket change for our wealthy donors! Surely they're rallying at South Fork as we speak, smoking cigars and drinking bourbon in a wood-paneled room full of leather couches and cowhide rugs, one by one dropping giant bags of cash into an oversized cowboy hat that one of them will toss to Sark as he is unceremoniously kicked out of a late-model American-made land yacht with a genuine longhorn hood ornament into the dusty desert night. Or maybe they'll toss him out of a helicopter! That's actually happening, right? If not, surely someone here knows one of these bigwigs, these veritable Gods Amongst Men. These Kings of the Program! Give your contact a call and let them know that they alone have the power to save us! What about Chip Kelly? Saban? Saban's realtor? 4. Depression. At this stage, the truth sinks in: Urban Meyer is not coming. Neither is Chip Kelly. Or Saban, Gruden, or Stoops. Or even Chris Peterson. You must now face the fact that the program sucks. Just fundamentally sucks, in every conceivable way. Nobody wants to coach here. Nobody wants to play here. Maybe it's cursed. Maybe it's run by incompetent boobs. (What kind of idiot thinks he knows anything about football just because he has a pile of oil money and a giant sedan with longhorns glued to the grill? Who died and made that archetype I probably concocted in my own imagination King of the Program, anyway?!?) Whatever the case, you now admit to yourself that you spend an inordinate amount of time and money supporting a mediocre football team. What happened to your life? You once had enthusiasm. Promise. Ambition. Now you just mope around drunk, declining food and sex after the orange team humiliates themselves on national TV, which is a weekly occurrence. "You sicken me," you spit through gritted teeth at your haphazardly-lipsticked face in the mirror. 5. Unbridled Optimism About the New Guy. The final stage of grief for the failed Longhorn coach commences immediately upon the hiring of the New Guy. The New Guy is a perfect fit. He's a hidden gem. He checks all the boxes. He will optimize the talent on hand. He will immediately improve recruiting. He will not botch talent evaluation like The Last Guy or The Guy Before That. He knows how to schmooze the boosters. He tells it like it is. Yep, one thing is for sure, you proudly inform any distant relative or acquaintance fortunate enough to be standing nearby and too polite to interrupt your sermon on the Good News of the New Guy: The New Guy is going to Bring Texas Back. I've never been so sure of anything in my life.
    10 points
  7. His next job is always imminent, and it's always "the last job he will ever have." At the age of 16, I dared to bring my little girlfriend to the family Thanksgiving. After several Budweisers, but before the meal was eaten, Redneck Uncle Gary asked my dear friend had she "let me get a little stinky on my pinky yet?"
    10 points
  8. Neverminding Nahlin, why should anyone be even vaguely protective of Major Appleblack at this point? He's a JAG fortunate enough to be on a roster with a bigger JAG with a penchant for panicking. I'm feeling pretty, prettaaaaayyy good about 2022 QB, personally. At least the betting part of it.
    10 points
  9. Oh hey, another opportunity for workswithseed to realize that his information sources are 100% bullshit that will be completely missed.
    10 points
  10. This little fella met up with a bullet in Menard County this weekend. 28 points. Unofficial B&C north of 180.
    10 points
  11. 10 points
  12. Must have been a tough decision at some level for her to beat her son with that bat.
    9 points
  13. 90% of that thread is you with Kyle's cock in your mouth.
    9 points
  14. 9 points
  15. They shared footage of lots of other people going into the house to look. Guess what was different about all of them?
    9 points
  16. Is it okay to discuss the Men's basketball team in this thread or is that going to interrupt your two-page discussion on esoteric generation definitions?
    9 points
  17. I spent a couple of days last week hiking in The Joshua Tree National Park.
    9 points
  18. Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk
    8 points
  19. I mean, if there's video evidence of you seriously injuring a woman or a child, fuck your right to a fair trial. Why should taxpayers have to pay for your attorney through all the appeals and your incarceration for however long? There are too many people on this planet and if you do some shit like that and it's on video, we can cull the herd starting with you. There's no rehabilitating a guy like that. So cut the losses for society and get rid of him.
    8 points
  20. Yep, that’s ugly. Good thing there was a camera. my wife knew a girl in HS who was “dating” a 31 y/o gang member. And by “dating” l mean he was just some neighbor who declared they was dating one day and just repeatedly raped her until she just went along with it. Parents called cops and there were police reports etc, but this guy was major. He was a known killer. SAPD were like “yeah, that’s domestic problem” (this was before sex crimes were extra bad. no one gave a shit about, there was no registering, hash penalties or mandatory monitoring. This piece of shit actually came to Alamo Heights HS went to her and my wife’s class, walked in and drug her out by her hair once. Teacher kept teaching like nothing. a little while after that while he was in the drive thru at a Taco Cabana some one walked up to his car and literally blew his head off with a shotgun and no one ever figured out who did it. Damndest thing.
    8 points
  21. Lol, wut? Lawyers representing clients are not impartial. Being "impartial" towards your own client would in fact violate a lawyers ethics. It's not a different interpretation of conflicts, it's a difference in what a lawyers ethical obligations are to their client which is different than some other lines of work. The judge is the one who is impartial as between advocates. The biggest problem in the industry, in my opinion, is judges who are elected and raise money for their campaigns. It's an issue that drives me absolutely crazy in Oklahoma, especially when the judge lists their "supporters" meaning other lawyers who gave them money. I can't possibly see how that is not a conflict when one of those lawyers appears before that judge, especially if it's published that the opposing counsel maybe supported someone else.
    8 points
  22. After spending the last 15 minutes catching up on this thread...
    8 points
  23. When my daughters were young, I ask both of them to be careful who they hung with and to never put themselves in a situation that would eventually put their dad in prison. If he did that to my daughter, he wouldn't live to see another sunrise.
    8 points
  24. that's an easy fix lol someone tweet this to that guy. 5* WR TRUE FRESHMAN Comparison Texas & Texas A&M. Xavier Worthy Vs Demond Demas Worthy: 10 Games - 4.9 Rec per Game - 11 TD’s - 1.1 TD per Game - 831 Rec Yards - 83.1 Yds Per Game Demas: 4 Games - 0 Rec per Game - 0 TD - .00 TD’s Per Game - 0 Rec Yds - 0.0 Yds Per Game
    8 points
  25. Road dinner in hotel room: gumbo and fried seafood.
    8 points
  26. Rut starting...cold front moving in. 4:40 this afternoon.
    8 points
  27. Apparently this one was shot on the next pasture over, about 5 miles from us: Someone in our group went through the trouble of of verifying it. CHIEF
    7 points
  28. You're right. Let me try again. At my summer house my dumb servant-boy, Gilbert, accidentally broke my antique French Doors. I considered garnishing his wages, but I don't really pay him enough to make a dent, so I'm thinking about taking some money out of the house to replace them. And yes, I realize I could just sell one of my boats to cover the cost, but with a Regatta coming up, one can never have too many options. Cheers.
    7 points
  29. Sadly, it is all too human. The inclination of the strong to dominate the weak is likely our natural state. Civilizing the beast within is one of our species most remarkable traits. Still, the beast is within. Look at the posts wanting him raped in prison or slowly killed. I've got the same basic feelings. Those aren't exactly civilized responses. The animal is there in all of us. The best of us keep it contained.
    7 points
  30. Refs names are publicly available for all games. Most radio and television broadcasts name them at the start of the game and often refer to them by name throughout the game. Bowlsby is pissed because they called him out personally, and he has thin skin and a tiny dick. Fuck that guy. The worst part may be that the Tech AD is a big reason why the Big 12 leftovers were able to stick together and bring in the new teams, thereby saving Bowlsby's job. After UT and OU leave, Tech is one of the largest brands left in the conference (probably the largest). He should be kissing their ass. What an idiot.
    7 points
  31. This shit is getting old man. "I'm too lazy to Google for myself, can't you just tell me and do the Google search for meee?" But I digress, from NPR's reporting on the prosecution earlier in the trial: The key takeaways are: Arbery did not go into anyone's home, and only ran through a new home build. The defendants just assumed Arbery was the thief behind some recent break-ins. Give ya a dollar if you can guess why. The neighbor that observed Arbery specifically DID NOT ask the defendants to do anything about it. Defendants chase Arbery down the road with two different cars, corner him, and kill him under suspicion of being the neighborhood thief
    7 points
  32. You don't have the facts in line which means you should probably not post random shit like that.
    7 points
  33. It just hit me, I actually think Hudson Card could really help the program if he sticks around for 2022. The WR room is pretty barren and he's allegedly got really excellent (albeit frighteningly small) hands.
    6 points
  34. Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk
    6 points
  35. i guess we finally found the second thing anastasis is willing to take a hard defined position on.
    6 points
  36. Because recruiting at LSU is easier. Literal morons have won national championships there.
    6 points
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