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2021 Houston Texans Ain't Shit Season Thread


Brothahorn

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1 hour ago, tx 3 putt said:

Texans should get credit for paying two black head coaches at the same time !

They’re gonna have McCown be an assistant one year, promote him to co-HC, “resurrect” Culley to another co-HC and have the first Holy Trinity of NFL coaches. Their fan promotions will consist of full immersion baptisms and sermons by Joel Osteen. 

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12 hours ago, Gourmand said:

I'm cool with Lovie and honestly didn't understand why he wasn't considered from the outset.

Yep lovie should’ve been a head coach a long time ago and the fact that he had to wait till he was 63 to be an hc in the nfl shows that we have a long way to go in regards to jot being racist

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19 minutes ago, Planet Houston said:

They’re gonna have McCown be an assistant one year, promote him to co-HC, “resurrect” Culley to another co-HC and have the first Holy Trinity of NFL coaches. Their fan promotions will consist of full immersion baptisms and sermons by Joel Osteen. 

I doubt Easterby is an Osteen "christian." Both are charlatans.

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39 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

I doubt Easterby is an Osteen "christian." Both are charlatans.

I’m not sure what this means. Yes, they’re both charlatans. Yes, they both likely have the gullible and ass-backwards ancient Janice McNair lapping out of their hands (or someone like Osteen in the Baptist church). Sounds pretty similar to me. 

Janice has a hold on this train wreck that I’ve never really heard mentioned in the media. 

Edited by Planet Houston
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10 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Yep lovie should’ve been a head coach a long time ago and the fact that he had to wait till he was 63 to be an hc in the nfl shows that we have a long way to go in regards to jot being racist

You mean the same Lovie Smith who got a Rex Grossman led team to the Super Bowl?

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2 hours ago, Jshep34 said:

Wow, give the gm a raise to top 3 paid gms.cal and Janice continue to somehow, someway sink this franchise further and further each day into the ground

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk
 

It’s not a raise, it’s his original contract….

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10 minutes ago, TonyTexas said:

I guess Lovie Smith isn’t black enough for Flores  if you can actually lose a P.R. battle to the Texans, you’re doing something very wrong  

 

Lulz as someone upstream mentioned, we’re already paying two black head coaches next year, WTF does he want from us?

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2 hours ago, TonyTexas said:

I guess Lovie Smith isn’t black enough for Flores  if you can actually lose a P.R. battle to the Texans, you’re doing something very wrong  

 

Excuse Me Reaction GIF by Bounce

 

Wait..so he fired off this lawsuit BEFORE he found out whether or not he was getting the Houston job?  And then thought that they would hire him anyway?

Edited by MadBurgerMaker
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1 hour ago, MadBurgerMaker said:

Excuse Me Reaction GIF by Bounce

 

Wait..so he fired off this lawsuit BEFORE he found out whether or not he was getting the Houston job?  And then thought that they would hire him anyway?

No, he knew this was another in a series of sham interviews that comprise much of the rest of the suit and that the Texans were going to hire McCown. It was an ingenious little fuck you that also resulted in a Black coach getting a job. 

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23 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

No, he knew this was another in a series of sham interviews that comprise much of the rest of the suit and that the Texans were going to hire McCown. It was an ingenious little fuck you that also resulted in a Black coach getting a job. 

So here's what he/his lawyers said after Lovie was hired:

Quote

"Mr. Flores is happy to hear that the Texans have hired a Black head coach, Lovie Smith, as Mr. Flores’ goal in bringing his case is to provide real opportunities for Black and minority candidates to be considered for coaching and executive positions within the NFL," Flores' attorneys Douglas H. Wigdor and John Elefterakis said in a joint statement. "However, we would be remiss not to mention that Mr. Flores was one of three finalists for the Texans’ head coach position and, after a great interview and mutual interest, it is obvious that the only reason Mr. Flores was not selected was his decision to stand up against racial inequality across the NFL."

 

Edited by MadBurgerMaker
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3 minutes ago, MadBurgerMaker said:

So here's what he/his lawyers said after Lovie was hired:

 

That is what they are saying but I don't believe it. And the consensus was that McCown was the guy until the suit was filed. I think Flores's lawyers were hoping the Texans would be dumb enough to hire McCown anyway but even they are not quite that stupid. 

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12 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

That is what they are saying but I don't believe it. And the consensus was that McCown was the guy until the suit was filed. I think Flores's lawyers were hoping the Texans would be dumb enough to hire McCown anyway but even they are not quite that stupid. 

Which consensus?  Here?  The Texans weren't saying shit, and then they didn't hire McCown despite apparently being utterly regarded PR wise.  Hell they STILL haven't hired him, which is weird since they can just make him a QB coach and it would be perfectly normal.  I kinda thought that would have happened already, actually...

Anyhow, that's what they've been saying since Lovie was hired.  That quote was from a week ago.  

Edited by MadBurgerMaker
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I think they were actually going to hire Flores.  They shitcanned Culley a couple days after Miami fired him (on Black Monday), like they hadn't planned on doing it, but then surprise! Flores notified the Texans and Saints that he was going to sue the NFL (before it was made public but after the interviews).  They're not going to say that's why, but come on.  

Edited by MadBurgerMaker
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37 minutes ago, Murfdogg21 said:

I assumed that after Flores did not get the Bears or Giants jobs, he decided he didn’t want the Texans or Saints jobs and told his lawyer to drop bombs. 

This. I don't know enough about the current state of the Saints to know why he wouldn't want that job but there are millions of reasons anyone not hoping to pad their retirement or with an insane ego would take the Texans job.

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8 hours ago, MonkeyDoughnut said:

Texans are dumb enough to have emails or written text that will implicates themselves....Flores likely got the ammo his lawyers needed...and will all be because of the Texans... I'm sure the other owners will be thrilled to deal with Texans in the futures.

Hiring Lovie Smith is basically admitting that they're a bunch of fucking idiots. "Quick just hire the nearest black guy so we can say we aren't racist. Scrap that plan of hiring the zero experience white dude over all the other coaches who have actually coached in this league". They let public opinion influence their decision making. Hmmmmm i wonder why that is. I could at least have some sliver of respect for them if they just stuck to their guns and hired the person they obviously wanted all along.

Their "coaching search" was a complete joke, they were never serious about hiring anyone other than McClown, they interviewed Hines Ward and Jerod Mayo for fucks sake. They didn't even seem to be interested in Doug Pederson.

So it really comes down to, i don't think racism is what motivated the Texans to behave the way they did, it was just a byproduct. I think that they used a black guy(David Culley) to be a placeholder coach for the white guy they really wanted, because their GM apparently wants to be on the headset coaching on Sundays too. They probably thought hiring McClown wouldn't look so bad after they gave Culley "his chance". If you called them out for hiring someone with no experience, they could just say "no we arent racist, we gave Culley a chance".

Any good coach is gonna say yeah, go fuck yourself Caserio. So they have to literally hire a complete noob to be on the headset so Caserio can play out his little fantasy of being the GM version of Belichick.

 

Edited by Pam Cummings
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8 hours ago, MadBurgerMaker said:

It's almost like the Texans didn't say anything throughout the process except who they had interviewed and it was all just message board clowns and sports journalists making shit up.  Weird!

Hi Mrs. Easterby! How's your son doing? 

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16 hours ago, Js1 said:

 

A) I'm not sure it's weird at all.  Are finalists for head coaching jobs who aren't selected always offered a different job, and if so, do they always take it?

B) Trying to apply any sort of logic to the Texans' front office decisions seems like a tricky proposition.  It's entirely possible that a talking Jesus head appeared on somebody's toast and told the Texans to pass on that guy.

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Saw a (probably bullshit) post from a sports radio guy in DC alleging the team once know as the WFT is offering Chase Young, 1st and 2nd rounder this year, and 3rd rounder next year for DeShaun. If they were willing to do this without regard to his legal situation and DW would waive his no-trade I’d take that deal in a heartbeat…

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