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The Leopards Eating Faces and Unlubed Dildo of Consequences Thread


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Posted
19 minutes ago, BrickHorn said:

Ha. Similar experience here. I was in maybe 8th or 9th grade and visiting my dad’s family one summer. They lived in a tiny farm town of a few hundred people. I usually hated visiting because that meant spending most of Sunday in a Baptist church with no AC. But there were hot girls in Sunday school so I was looking forward to it this time around. 

We did a Bible reading where the kids in class took turns stumbling through part of a passage, then passing it to the next kid. It got to me and I read the next few lines (it was probably something about smiting some poor bastards), making sure not to fuck up any of the inane textual bullshit so as not to look dumb in front of the ladies. When I finished, the teacher looked at me and asked “Are you a [surname]?” I answered “Yes. Why?” “Because you sure read like one.” Apparently, my family is famous for being the town literates. 

 

  • Haha 4
Posted
1 hour ago, Brisketexan said:

38.  Unfair.  If they'd asked some more redneck-ish questions, like "how often do you hunt," and "do you eat food from gas stations," and "have you ever fallen off a boat because you were drunk," and shit like that, I'd have scored 100.

How many episodes of "Hee Haw" have you seen?

 

I got a 59, and I'm a fucking coastal liberal.   Who drives a pick-up truck. Who's dad drove a truck.  Who's changed many truck tires.

Posted

image.png.665124321c5b6b49887e6c4406b0131f.png

 

I feel like I got some cheap points here.  Have I walked a factory floor?  I mean, yeah--when I was doing a site inspection in litigation.  Oh--and when I went on the field trip in elementary school to the Mrs. Baird's factory.  That was fucking awesome.  You got a slice of buttered bread at the end.

Have I gone fishing in the last 12 months?  I mean, yeah.  But I don't think deep-sea fishing in Mexico really gives me the working-class bona-fides they're looking for.

And I saw most of those movies because Mrs.LL has shit taste in movies, but I like to get laid.

Posted
11 minutes ago, Ghost of LL said:

image.png.665124321c5b6b49887e6c4406b0131f.png

 

I feel like I got some cheap points here.  Have I walked a factory floor?  I mean, yeah--when I was doing a site inspection in litigation.  Oh--and when I went on the field trip in elementary school to the Mrs. Baird's factory.  That was fucking awesome.  You got a slice of buttered bread at the end.

Have I gone fishing in the last 12 months?  I mean, yeah.  But I don't think deep-sea fishing in Mexico really gives me the working-class bona-fides they're looking for.

And I saw most of those movies because Mrs.LL has shit taste in movies, but I like to get laid.

Yeah, after discussing this with GOLL, I am going to take another run at it (forgot that the first several years of my life, lived in a shitty apartment.  And I've walked multiple factory floors.  And there may be another question or two that I have thought on that may be relevant).

Posted
1 hour ago, BrickHorn said:

Apparently, my family is famous for being the town literates. 

Better than being the town drunks.  (Two things can be true at once, though.)

Posted
6 hours ago, Longhorn_Fan68 said:

11–80: A first-generation upper-middle-class person with middle-class parents. Typical: 33.

if a few of the questions had used 'family' instead of 'friends' i would have scored higher...

but anyway, this nailed it for me lol



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