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Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen

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  • k Excited for more tears

  • FYI - just cross-posting a really nice story.     Embedded tweet w/ anecdote.      

  • Jimmy Two Times
    Jimmy Two Times

    13,000 posts on surlyhorns.com is the hallmark of a guy who's just too busy to tune into commitment ceremonies. 

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The straws, they are so slippery, but if Hank grasps harder I think he can grab them.

Edited by texifornia

5 minutes ago, texifornia said:

The straws, they are so slippery, but if Hank grasps harder I think he can grab them.

Bob Belcher Grasping At Straws GIF by Bob's Burgers

1 hour ago, UDontKnow said:

Or fucking Prothro. Wait. @SydneyCarton might fuck Prothro. Can't rule out that possibility.

Please, that’s insulting. I’m not a whore.

I’m just a slut. There’s a difference. 

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

did Prothro marry a white chick?

I hope not, bitch gonna take half. 

2 hours ago, texifornia said:

I don't think our staff has shown even a hint of interest in him in over a year. I'd be shocked if he's the backup plan.

Shame.
Ojo made him look like Colin Simmons. 

1 hour ago, Hitch said:

Big boy recruiting actually kinda sucks. 

Show us your results in Dec.

2 hours ago, Rimbo said:

just because a guy has bad judgment doesn't mean he's bad at football

Some kids may not be that smart, but when you put $40K in their hand and someone else puts $400K in their hand, well.....that don't require that much smarts.

1 hour ago, Js1 said:

They just got picked by the Big 12 coaches to have the fourth best odds to make the Big 12 title game.  These kids are going to look sideways at Joey if they finish 4th and don’t make the CFP with what they spent on the portal This offseason 

So, some of these kids are making more than their coaches....so, when a coach tells a player to run laps or whatever, the player just looks at the coach, laughs, and walks to the dressing room.

1 hour ago, Lonestar88 said:

Yeah, that’s a known bidding war, landing him would fly in the face of everything else we’ve  done this cycle.

 I mean, Wesley who was previously committed to Oregon definitely wasn’t for free and it’s been said here we are saving money for 3 players. Have to assume we’re involved in said bidding war.

18 minutes ago, Cairn Horn88 said:

So, some of these kids are making more than their coaches....so, when a coach tells a player to run laps or whatever, the player just looks at the coach, laughs, and walks to the dressing room.

That will definitely impress the NFL coaches that they would also potentially make more than

Edited by Hank_Hill

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Word on the street is that if you combine the money given to Carlton and Ojo, it still wouldn't pay Ketch's tab at Golden Corral.

19 hours ago, 6th Street said:

Does this impact Calicut's star rating?

Not sure but how does this affect Georgia's Fulmer Cup rankings?

2 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

Not sure but how does this affect Georgia's Fulmer Cup rankings?

RIP, Fulmer Cup 

Looking forward to the 2026 free agent class. Texas is $20M under the cap after all the whiffs 

9 hours ago, Hookem2147 said:

Wow. From Sam Spiegelman this morning:

Hey y'all ... a few hours out from Jamarion Carlton's 4 pm commitment

This has been Texas vs Baylor for days -- Baylor has had a ton of momentum since June 20. That momentum has faded a good bit over the last few days

That has coincided with a full-court press from La'Allen Clark and many behind the scenes at UT. I am not ruling out Baylor, but I am leaning toward the Longhorns with Carlton based off intel and conversations had this morning

My pick is on already on UT -- and I'm feeling stronger about this as we get closer

Season 5 Nbc GIF by The Office

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3 hours ago, Sgt Hulk said:

What’s left on the target board 

image.jpeg.cc81ea2e94fb7a609bb167be824abd30.jpeg

2 hours ago, Ricky Butler said:

Feels like the NBA summer when Keith Van Horn got a max deal. 

Or the time he came out of retirement to be part of a trade and get paid $20M.

2 minutes ago, Dbeasy said:

image.jpeg.cc81ea2e94fb7a609bb167be824abd30.jpeg

 

 

Brace for it.

43 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

 I mean, Wesley who was previously committed to Oregon definitely wasn’t for free and it’s been said here we are saving money for 3 players. Have to assume we’re involved in said bidding war.

We’re saving for 3 players? Where did you hear that shit?

6 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

We’re saving for 3 players? Where did you hear that shit?

 

Dude, he said, " it’s been said here we are saving money for 3 players". And you know that he is in Maui. So, I think reading comprehension would indicate that he heard it in Maui, probably from a patient under sedation. 

50 minutes ago, Josef Pwag said:

Word on the street is that if you combine the money given to Carlton and Ojo, it still wouldn't pay Ketch's tab at Golden Corral.

Or his ham tab

7 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

We’re saving for 3 players? Where did you hear that shit?

 

IMG_0263.jpeg

11 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

We’re saving for 3 players? Where did you hear that shit?

 

On 7/8/2025 at 1:24 PM, Blackcat00 said:

We have allocated a dumptruck of money for 3 remaining recruits, this kid today was not one of them. 

Idk his creds but feel like he’s brought dependable info before? I do have a concussion tho

1 minute ago, Hank_Hill said:

 

Idk his creds but feel like he’s brought dependable info before? I do have a concussion tho

 

Bedpost? Video or GTFOOH.

7 minutes ago, Bevo said:

 

Dude, he said, " it’s been said here we are saving money for 3 players". And you know that he is in Maui. So, I think reading comprehension would indicate that he heard it in Maui, probably from a patient under sedation. 

Don’t underestimate the Polynesian ties

2 minutes ago, Bevo said:

 

Bedpost? Video or GTFOOH.

I wish. Got sucker punched by a local with 10 warrants outside a bar I shouldn’t have been at mostly unprovoked. My wife wasn’t there and doesn’t believe my innocence (doesn’t help that I don’t remember much, but by witness accounts) so I won’t be giving or receiving bedpost concussions for a few nights. 

  • Author
16 minutes ago, theaveragejon said:

What a strange recruitment, no? 

Carlton? Eh, just felt like other teams have always wanted him more, and now feel like they can promise enough cash to make that happen for them. This isn't an Edwards or Lee where it feels like he was ever on top of our board.

3 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Carlton? Eh, just felt like other teams have always wanted him more, and now feel like they can promise enough cash to make that happen for them. This isn't an Edwards or Lee where it feels like he was ever on top of our board.

Cool. For some reason I thought we were in front of this recruitment. Having Sark has really lowered my interest in recruiting. We actually look forward to the season and games. I love it. 

  • Author
3 minutes ago, theaveragejon said:

Cool. For some reason I thought we were in front of this recruitment. Having Sark has really lowered my interest in recruiting. We actually look forward to the season and games. I love it. 

We have been, on and off, seems like all things being equal he'd end up at Texas, but we paid Wesley the top of the line edge money and there's only so much to go around.

Hey, Baylor is relevant!

500 days of summer dance GIF by 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment

1 hour ago, Dbeasy said:

image.jpeg.cc81ea2e94fb7a609bb167be824abd30.jpeg

Texas was the clear leader up until the beginning of this week, but I'm hearing from multiple sources that UTEP pulled this one out at the finish.

40 minutes ago, texifornia said:

We have been, on and off, seems like all things being equal he'd end up at Texas, but we paid Wesley the top of the line edge money and there's only so much to go around.

Tell that to A&M, UGA and Bama. Seems like they have that and some more. 
 

1 hour ago, Dbeasy said:

image.jpeg.cc81ea2e94fb7a609bb167be824abd30.jpeg

I'm not buying that the staff can have him up to 300 by September.

But what i like about this kid is that my source in Cul-de-sac Heights said he has the IT factor. 

But what i don't like is that Cul-de-sac Heights isn't a real place and I made up the source.  

Either way, we'll continue to monitor this as things unfold. 

Maybe we’ll pay a shitload for the fat kid that isn’t a TE or OT

28 minutes ago, Drifterwood said:

Maybe we’ll pay a shitload for the fat kid that isn’t a TE or OT

That is one I am glad we are not paying up for.

Pet head. On floor. Another pet head. Onto the coffee table. They aren’t on now. And they weren’t removed by external means. 

Can someone explain how LSU continues to find this money when we have heard for years that they’re broke?

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15 minutes ago, Ghost of Shag said:

Can someone explain how LSU continues to find this money when we have heard for years that they’re broke?

wave waving GIF by Children's Miracle Network Hospitals

21 minutes ago, Ghost of Shag said:

Can someone explain how LSU continues to find this money when we have heard for years that they’re broke?

the-dark-knight-heath-ledger.gif

23 minutes ago, Ghost of Shag said:

Can someone explain how LSU continues to find this money when we have heard for years that they’re broke?

They sell their organs.

 

1 minute ago, Ghost of Shag said:

Can someone explain how LSU continues to find this money when we have heard for years that they’re broke?

where do you think the medicaid cuts are going into

34 minutes ago, westexhorn said:

where do you think the medicaid cuts are going into

I believe Louisiana also allocated a relatively small but not insignificant portion of the state's payout from the settlement of the AG's lawsuit against Juul to LSU NIL - which is one of the most LSU things I've ever heard

 

Edit. Found it: https://frontofficesports.com/louisiana-ag-uses-juul-settlement-for-nil-deals/

Edited by campcrunk

1 hour ago, Ghost of Shag said:

Can someone explain how LSU continues to find this money when we have heard for years that they’re broke?

Uncle Pastor Parish Priests agents

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