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Trivial things that make you surly


elfenix

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When you make an obvious stop/ yield right of way, trying to convey courtesy and caution...
 
and they fucking piddle their way across in front of you.  Gotdammit, move your ass, motherfucker... my good nature is not infinite.
Anyone not moving their ass to get out of the way in parking lots make me surly. Completely oblivious to their surroundings with no fucks given.
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9 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

Staying on South Padre Island (not making me surly).  Several cross streets are named after planets in this order, driving north from the causeway:

Saturn

Venus

Jupiter 

Mars

Would it have been that damn hard to put them in the correct order? Makes my OCD kick in every time I pass them. 

Careful on Uranus street. 

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On 12/16/2020 at 6:28 AM, VolenteHawk said:

If you’re in Dallas and have an ultra strict no beverage policy, it was me a few weeks ago.

Now, I’m cool with the policy if they feel like they need it. If I’m swilling a to go beer at 2:15 and you’re dropping me at Waffle House, stand firm. Rules are rules. If you’re picking me up outside a hotel at 8am for a morning of meetings, dressed in office attire, and wearing a watch that’s worth more than the car I’m about to get in...take a context clue and be flexible. Ultimately it’s up to the driver, but if I’m ditching this coffee and he’s a dick about it...that’s 1 star and part of his tip is replacing the coffee 11 minutes from now. Driver’s choice.

 

can afford expensive watch but not manners...

Typical.

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40 minutes ago, Player said:

Trying to put fresh produce in the little plastic bags at HEB, but not being able to get the bag open because you’re wearing a mask and can’t lick your fingertip.

Two hacks:

1) Go over by the produce that has the misting on it. There’s always condensation you can use to wet your fingers. 
2) Wet your fingers by moving your mask and licking your fingers. It has the added benefit of freaking out the Karens around you. 

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11 minutes ago, nnm said:

Two hacks:

1) Go over by the produce that has the misting on it. There’s always condensation you can use to wet your fingers. 
2) Wet your fingers by moving your mask and licking your fingers. It has the added benefit of freaking out the Karens around you. 

3. Run two fingers real quick up and down your ass-crack, smile at people while you do this. 

Edited by 956 Worldwide
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59 minutes ago, deadshank said:

Lazy ass mofos that don’t pick up after themselves.  Just got up and walked away with a trash can 5 feet away.   
 

I hope your Christmas sucks, Ahole. 

547E6D0A-78D5-40DA-848B-6B72F252AB1B.jpeg

you have human rights. you also have human responsibilities.  one of those is to clean up after yourself.  and your dog. 

Edited by elfenix
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Call people out on that shit. Politely so it leaves them a graceful exit, framed in a way that makes it seem you’re confident they will do the right thing.

”Hey sir, I think you forgot to throw that away.”

”Ma’am, did you notice this is an express checkout.”

Not worth escalating beyond that for sure, but it is worth making an asshole come to grips with who they are if even for a moment. 

Edited by 956 Worldwide
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Two hacks:
1) Go over by the produce that has the misting on it. There’s always condensation you can use to wet your fingers. 
2) Wet your fingers by moving your mask and licking your fingers. It has the added benefit of freaking out the Karens around you. 

I’ve started getting 4 or 5 bags at once and opening them while my hands are still wet from the foam sanitizer.
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Two hacks:
1) Go over by the produce that has the misting on it. There’s always condensation you can use to wet your fingers. 
2) Wet your fingers by moving your mask and licking your fingers. It has the added benefit of freaking out the Karens around you. 

#1 is what I do.

I’ll try #2 next time I see a Karen in the produce section.
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Lazy ass mofos that don’t pick up after themselves.  Just got up and walked away with a trash can 5 feet away.   
 
I hope your Christmas sucks, Ahole. 
547E6D0A-78D5-40DA-848B-6B72F252AB1B.thumb.jpeg.1ec6649c0ce1ef14e9d138109083bd65.jpeg
I stop and point this shit out to my kids. See those people? They're pigs. Don't be a pig.

Now they point it out to me when they see it so mission accomplished.
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7 hours ago, deadshank said:

Emotional support dogs.  There are 3 boarding my flight leg from Love to NC 

WTH?  Real deal or hoax? The people look eerily normal.  What gives?

Not Trivial!!!!

Fuck that shit. Get that shit out of here. If you can't survive a few hour flight without it, stay home.

Thank god the regs changed just this month and many airlines are banning them completely:

https://www.forbes.com/sites/michaelgoldstein/2020/12/04/airlines-get-dot-ban-on-emotional-support-animals-for-now/?sh=633d9e033f9f

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Why is it so fucking hard to make simple plans for a meeting or event with some people? I'm a "meet at location X at time Y" kind of guy. I'm reasonably flexible on time and location, so if what I suggest doesn't work for the other party, I'm cool with that -- but then it's incumbent on them to propose a SPECIFIC alternative time and/or location. Some people act like divulging their schedules and itinerary, or agreeing to a simple appointment, would be a breach to fucking national security.

 

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6 minutes ago, Paper_jam said:

Why is it so fucking hard to make simple plans for a meeting or event with some people? I'm a "meet at location X at time Y" kind of guy. I'm reasonably flexible on time and location, so if what I suggest doesn't work for the other party, I'm cool with that -- but then it's incumbent on them to propose a SPECIFIC alternative time and/or location. Some people act like divulging their schedules and itinerary, or agreeing to a simple appointment, would be a breach to fucking national security.

 

Maybe they just don't like you ?

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6 minutes ago, Paper_jam said:

Why is it so fucking hard to make simple plans for a meeting or event with some people? I'm a "meet at location X at time Y" kind of guy. I'm reasonably flexible on time and location, so if what I suggest doesn't work for the other party, I'm cool with that -- but then it's incumbent on them to propose a SPECIFIC alternative time and/or location. Some people act like divulging their schedules and itinerary, or agreeing to a simple appointment, would be a breach to fucking national security.

 

Can I get back to you some other time on this?

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This is an old one, but it's still in play and a friend of mine has a solution.

When somebody says they are going to "reach out" to you, or is known to say that frequently, reply with something like "Yeah, I'll reach around when I have the facts." Follow up with "Hey I reached around yesterday but didn't hear back." Play dumb, of course. 

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When you break your toe while playing with your kids.

I was squatting between my kids - playing mastermind with my daughter on my left, putting together a LEGO set with my son on my right. I pivoted from one kid to the other, and my pinky toe decides to stay put. I heard a loud POP. At first I thought it was just dislocated it because it was pointing west, but wrapping an ice pack on it on the way to urgent care, it decided to move back to its rightful position.

The doc found a hairline fracture and put me in a boot. Thankfully it's pretty minor and I'll only hobble around for the next 3-4 weeks. But lemme tell you, right now it hurts like a mofo and I need a drink or three to ease the pain.

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6 hours ago, Superhero said:

When you break your toe while playing with your kids.

I was squatting between my kids - playing mastermind with my daughter on my left, putting together a LEGO set with my son on my right. I pivoted from one kid to the other, and my pinky toe decides to stay put. I heard a loud POP. At first I thought it was just dislocated it because it was pointing west, but wrapping an ice pack on it on the way to urgent care, it decided to move back to its rightful position.

The doc found a hairline fracture and put me in a boot. Thankfully it's pretty minor and I'll only hobble around for the next 3-4 weeks. But lemme tell you, right now it hurts like a mofo and I need a drink or three to ease the pain.

You might want to talk to someone about your codeine dependence. Self-harm to get pain meds is a red flag. 

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