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Here's how badly we've misjudged Gary Patterson all these years: it turns out those were never sweat towels. They were cold towels, soaked in ice water, run through a wringer, rolled up and kept in an ice box on the sideline. What we thought was sweat flying, was actually the cold water from the towels. 

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Gary Patterson officially joins Texas football program as special assistant to Steve Sarkisian

By FUCK CHIP BROWN       81 minutes ago

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Texas has finally made the worst-kept secret over the past month official: Former TCU coach Gary Patterson is joining the Texas football program as a special assistant to head coach Steve Sarkisian.

Texas made a job posting nearly two weeks ago outlining the special assistant's role is to help with “projects assigned by the head football coach … assist with the overall practice and game-day preparation, statistical analysis and video analysis of opposing teams … and assist with self-scouting of offensive, defensive and special teams schemes.”

The posting said the earliest start date would be (Saturday) Jan. 16. Patterson has been at work at Texas all week this week and was spotted at Texas' basketball game against Kansas State on Tuesday wearing Longhorn gear.

Processing Patterson's paperwork to make his hire official took more time than expected. But Patterson has been at UT’s 6:30 am offseason workouts, helping to evaluate UT’s 2023 recruiting targets ahead of this weekend’s Junior Day and anything else Sarkisian asks him about for input.

Sources close to the situation told Horns247 Patterson met Friday, Jan. 7, with Sarkisian and the UT coaching staff, toured the Longhorns’ football complex in the south end of DKR and had a productive, positive meeting.

Patterson, who turns 62 on Feb. 13, was the head coach at TCU for 21 years with a record of 181-79, winning six conference championships, before being let go when the Horned Frogs fell to 3-5 following a loss to Kansas State on Oct. 30. TCU finished the 2021 season 5-7 and hired SMU coach Sonny Dykes to replace Patterson.

Patterson has long been considered one of the best defensive minds in college football and knows Texas defensive coordinator Pete Kwiatkowski from their days competing against each other when TCU was in the Mountain West and Kwiatkowski was at Boise State under Chris Petersen. Kwiatkowski was the defensive line coach at Boise State when the Broncos defeated TCU 17-10 in the Fiesta Bowl capping the 2009 season when the Horned Frogs finished 12-1.

Patterson, however, brings more to the Texas football program than expertise on defense or how to scout Big 12 opponents. Patterson has an excellent working knowledge of how the Texas program works, including booster involvement, thanks to his wife, Kelsey, who worked for former UT athletic director DeLoss Dodds when she was a student at Texas.

Kelsey then went on to work for Lincoln Properties, a highly successful real estate company run by Texas booster Bill Duval.

Gary Patterson also still has a close relationship with Texas athletic director Chris Del Conte, who served as Patterson’s athletic director at TCU from 2009-17. That stretch included a 13-0 season in 2010 (capped by a Rose Bowl win over Wisconsin), two 12-1 seasons as well as the Horned Frogs transition to the Big 12 in 2012.

In other words, depending on how the Sarkisian-Patterson relationship develops, Patterson could serve as a quasi-general manager for Sarkisian in assisting with athletic department matters, booster relations and much more than just football.

Patterson told Horns247 on Tuesday he would like to be for Sarkisian what former Arizona and Hawaii head coach Dick Tomey was for Mack Brown.

When Mack Brown brought Tomey in as a one-year consultant in 2004, Tomey helped transform the Texas program from the inside as much as Vince Young was helping change the perception of the Texas program from the outside leading up to UT’s national title run in 2005.

 

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There maybe some.  However he has done more than TCU football than anyone could have imagined.  After being here so long, he was getting burned out and complacent with his assistants.  Sounds like someone you had not long ago.  I think it's just human nature that when in the same job for this many years, this can happen.  However, if you are making $6 million a year, your employer expects more.  I hope he does you all a great job except in one game a year.  
*one game next year

Because after that, it's over
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Dallas Morning News... Kevin Sherrington Jan 20, 2022

HAO66RP7DIPR4SKV4XNZ2FKHUU.jpg

Gary Patterson can fix Steve Sarkisian’s defense — just keep him away from the Texas players, maybe?

The old school former TCU coach may not mix so well with a roster — and program — that many perceive as entitled.

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Unless he’s just scouting Sixth Street for pickin’ gigs, Gary Patterson looks settled in at Texas. He was comfortable enough to turn up at a basketball game wearing a Longhorn over his heart, anyway. This could take some getting used to, particularly if purple is your predominant color scheme.

The good news for bereft TCU fans is that in his apparent role as special assistant to Steve Sarkisian, Gary won’t be quite as ubiquitous this fall.

This might also be welcome news among the more entitled members of the Longhorns football team. Of course, not every Texas player qualifies. The term might not even be accurate, much less fair. Could be they’ve just been overrated all these years. Or under-coached. Whatever it is, it’s something you have to account for in Austin, where the description has been passed down several administrations of football teams.

Ever since Mack Brown’s heyday, the knock on Texas’ talent is that it’s either soft or entitled or both. Sark didn’t get hired specifically to fix that reputation, at least not as far as I can tell. Texas boosters liked his offensive acumen and hoped that maybe Nick Saban had rubbed off on him, which, granted, would suggest a coach who suffered no fools. But, Sark’s offensive reputation preceded him.

Then he got to Austin, and next thing you know, players are complaining. Right on cue.

First Joshua Moore, a wide receiver, reportedly got into an argument with Sark at practice and eventually entered the transfer portal. A couple weeks later, a bold soul recorded a profanity-riddled rant by an assistant who was ticked off that a few players didn’t suffer a loss with the appropriate level of remorse. The video went viral, provoking as much commentary about the nerve of the videographer as it did the language of the starring coach.

Anyone who’s ever actually witnessed a football practice probably wouldn’t have been scarred by the video. Not that I’m condoning it, mind you. You can blame yours truly for the streak of sarcasm running through our four kids, but they didn’t learn any colorful language from their old man. Assuming they listened at all.

Anyway, Sark had a lot bigger problems in his first season than players put off by the style of his staff. Texas’ defense, if you want to call it that, looked like something you might call in from recess. The Longhorns’ defense ranked 100th, a number at least one zero too round. Considering his offensive reputation, Sark could figure out what went wrong with his offense this season, which is basically nothing a five-star quarterback couldn’t fix.

But, he desperately needs to repair his defense, too. And he found just the guy to do it.

No college football coach knows defense better than Gary Patterson, who, in his two decades at TCU, came up with more strategies than the Pentagon. His approach has been copied far and wide.

Never mind that TCU’s defense last season was even worse than Texas’. One of the reasons TCU fired the greatest coach in the little school’s history was that he’d worn out his welcome. He had a hard time adjusting to the sweeping changes in college athletics. Didn’t embrace the transfer portal. Even though a long line of his former players would defend Gary’s style, he’s also probably a little too old school for some of today’s athletes.

Consider this scene from the 2014 Peach Bowl: Late in a 42-3 dismantling of Mississippi, a TCU defensive back fouled up an assignment and returned to the bench, where he was greeted by his head coach. Gary got in the player’s face for a minute, maybe two. Probably seemed much longer to the player in question. Didn’t really surprise me. The Frogs were in the process of winning by nearly 40 points, but Gary is nothing if not demanding. Coaching his players hard and well put TCU on the map. But, it’s harder to get away with the former these days.

Fortunately for Gary, Sark just wants him for his big brain. As a special assistant, he won’t be on the sidelines. Even if it cuts back on his entertainment value, it circumvents the possibility that he might aggravate any sensitive souls. As an added bonus, Gary won’t have to put up with boosters and media.

Frankly, I don’t see the downside of any of this for Texas or Gary. Sark gets a great defensive mind, and Gary gets top talent for his schemes without all the fuss. Maybe he can do something with it that his predecessors couldn’t and help change an uncomfortable perception. At the very least, there are plenty of places to play his guitar.

 

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12 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

Dallas Morning News... Kevin Sherrington Jan 20, 2022

HAO66RP7DIPR4SKV4XNZ2FKHUU.jpg

Gary Patterson can fix Steve Sarkisian’s defense — just keep him away from the Texas players, maybe?

The old school former TCU coach may not mix so well with a roster — and program — that many perceive as entitled.

 

Fucking hate the Dallas Morning News. We could win the next 8 national championships and they would still find something to complain about us. 

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Earlier this week -- Dallas Morning News

By Chuck Carlton        Jan 14, 2022

Could joining Steve Sarkisian’s staff as an analyst be the resurrection Gary Patterson needs?

Quote

Patterson turns 62 next month and won 181 games at TCU before being pushed out on Oct. 31.  Sometime in the coming days, word that Gary Patterson is joining the extended Texas coaching staff is likely to leak out.

Barring an 11th-hour change of heart, it looks set to happen.

The former TCU coach has reportedly been spotted on campus a couple of times. Patterson’s background molding top defenses would seem to be an in-demand quality in Texas. There’s even an online job opening for a “special assistant to the head coach” that might be a good fit. 

Despite the high-sounding title, Patterson’s duties would fall into the broad and trendy category of off-the-field analyst, a position pioneered and perfected by Nick Saban and inevitably copied.

Former Colorado, Washington and UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel, now working with CBS Sports and SiriusXM, called the move “a great idea.” He said Patterson could fill a need for Texas coach Steve Sarkisian, coming off a disappointing 5-7 season in Austin.

“There’s no question Steve Sarkisian has the chops as a play-caller. There’s no question Steve Sarkisian has the chops as a quarterback guy,” Neuheisel said in a phone interview. “He’s done that and done it brilliantly. But at the end of the day, the $6 million a year or whatever they paid him to come be the head coach at Texas is far different than 5-7. 

“Gary Patterson can lend some advice to how to handle the staff, how to handle player personnel issues, discipline issues. And not certainly tell [Sarkisian] what to do but give him ideas what he’s done in the past and what’s been effective and not bad, that’s brilliant.”

To some Texas fans who watched the Longhorns finish eighth in the Big 12 in defense under coordinator Pete Kwiatkowski, it might be a disappointment that Patterson won’t be directly overseeing the defense.

But analysts are limited in what they can do and coaching on the field and in practice isn’t allowed. Game day preparation and scouting reports and self study and being another brain and set of eyes is the advantage.

“I think the idea really is for Patterson to be the head coach confidante on personnel issues, recruiting, how to handle situations,” Neuheisel said. “To me if he’s going to come in there and teach fire zones, that’s not nearly the same coup that it would be with 20 years of head coaching experience.”

While the move makes sense for Texas, does it make sense for Patterson?

He turns 62 next month, won 181 games at TCU before being pushed out on Oct. 31 and has a statue outside the stadium. He could devote his time to charity work or make a move to TV, like Mack Brown did for a couple of years after being fired at Texas.

But if Patterson has any thoughts of returning to the sidelines, it may not be a bad move. With so many changes in college football, Patterson runs the risk of being labeled a dinosaur in the world of the transfer portal and NIL. If he comes in and things seem to work with Sarkisian and Texas, that could be a nice springboard.

Athletic director Chris Del Conte is a buddy from their eight years together from TCU and no doubt has played a role in the overture. After last season, things can’t get much worse for Texas, can it?

Patterson could also be a handy replacement if something goes wrong. Remember Brown bringing the late Greg Robinson on board as an analyst in 2013 and then plugging him into the defensive coordinator role after firing Manny Diaz?

“I think it can definitely have a resurrection feeling for Gary,” Neuheisel said.

It’s helped other coaches before him.

Look no further than TCU, which hired SMU coach Sonny Dykes to replace Patterson. Dykes had served one year as an analyst at TCU.

“It was really an eye-opening experience for me to just see what kind of place it was,” Dykes said at his introductory press conference. “I always knew it was good looking from the outside-in, but having a chance to be here for a year really opened my eyes to what an incredible place this is.”

Sarkisian’s career got jumpstarted as an Alabama analyst after alcohol problems led to his dismissal at USC in 2015. He went from analyst to the Atlanta Falcons as offensive coordinator then back to Alabama as the OC on a national championship team before being hired at Texas.

He knows the drill.

“I think it was challenging prior to this, being in the analyst role, because you still get to work on the game plan side of things,” Sarkisian said back in 2017. “But it is frustrating as an analyst when you go out to practice and you’re not coaching. I mean, that’s what you love to do. But in my situation, when you’re not allowed to do that, it’s a lot of note-taking.”

Sarkisian is not alone in turning an analyst gig at Alabama into a career opportunity after a career interruption. So did Ole Miss coach Lane Kiffin and Maryland coach Mike Locksley and new Florida coach Billy Napier.

“I probably learned as much in that one year than I’d learned in a long time,” Napier told the Greenville News.

Saban started this early in his career at Alabama, basically bringing the concept of an NFL personnel department to college. When Saban began collecting championship rings, people took notice.

“There’s no one who searches for more information than Nick Saban and he’s the best of all-time,” Neuheisel said. “To me this is a no-brainer.”

 

 

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12 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

Soooo.... kinda like Kurt Bohls, Chip Brown, Brian Davis....

Never read any articles by these people. Only thing I see are tweets that are posted in here. Used to live in Dallas and just remember reading the DMN and laughing at how much they shit on us; some of it justified, a lot of it unnecessary. 

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2 hours ago, LTtxfan said:

Gary Patterson officially joins Texas football program as special assistant to Steve Sarkisian

By FUCK CHIP BROWN       81 minutes ago

 

Quote

Texas made a job posting nearly two weeks ago outlining the special assistant's role is to help with “projects assigned by the head football coach … assist with the overall practice and game-day preparation, statistical analysis and video analysis of opposing teams … and assist with self-scouting of offensive, defensive and special teams schemes.”

I feel like this could've been done much quicker since it looks like someone just dug up the same language Texas used to describe Gerg's last go-round.

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2 hours ago, Theo Aquacates said:

Fucking hate the Dallas Morning News. We could win the next 8 national championships and they would still find something to complain about us. 

The news has sucked ass for decades.  Kiss anybodies ass Chuck Fuckhead sports writer he as much as tiny dick kurt bowles should be tied and drug behind the lil cheat fucksticks wagon while waiting to writing the next hit piece on Texas.  Good news these fucktards from the shitting 8 conference as stuck “who’s in our league the weeks version of pulp fiction.”  So lube up the lil 12/10/16 get your magic underwear everyone in the gay lord family ass salute lincoln fuck norman riley for a gang bang at the athletic dorm!

YOU’RE WELCOME…

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Man, back before the interGoogles one of my great pleasures in life was waking up Sunday morning, getting baked at my house right by the old airport, rolling by the newspaper machine (look it up kids) that stocked the late-edition Sunday DMN and posting up at Juan In A Million for breakfast and the DMN Sunday sports section. In mid-October that fucking thing was thicker than the phone book in my home town, with a shitload of great writers (whether I agreed with them or not)….

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33 minutes ago, Texas Native said:

The news has sucked ass for decades.  Kiss anybodies ass Chuck Fuckhead sports writer he as much as tiny dick kurt bowles should be tied and drug behind the lil cheat fucksticks wagon while waiting to writing the next hit piece on Texas.  Good news these fucktards from the shitting 8 conference as stuck “who’s in our league the weeks version of pulp fiction.”  So lube up the lil 12/10/16 get your magic underwear everyone in the gay lord family ass salute lincoln fuck norman riley for a gang bang at the athletic dorm!

YOU’RE WELCOME…

Think this one might take me a bit to decipher.  

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30 minutes ago, Ignatius said:

Man, back before the interGoogles one of my great pleasures in life was waking up Sunday morning, getting baked at my house right by the old airport, rolling by the newspaper machine (look it up kids) that stocked the late-edition Sunday DMN and posting up at Juan In A Million for breakfast and the DMN Sunday sports section. In mid-October that fucking thing was thicker than the phone book in my home town, with a shitload of great writers (whether I agreed with them or not)….

When I was a UT student my roommate and I took the DMN at home just because of the kickass Sports section.  It was among the very best in the country.

I miss the days of reading a morning newspaper.

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3 hours ago, Theo Aquacates said:

Fucking hate the Dallas Morning News. We could win the next 8 national championships and they would still find something to complain about us. 

 

3 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Soooo.... kinda like Kurt Bohls, Chip Brown, Brian Davis, and Surly football board....

Fixed

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On 1/19/2022 at 4:40 PM, Pig Bellmont said:

I’d rather fire PK now and be done with it rather than watch Kansas score 50+ with a 3rd string qb (again) and then fire PK

You can’t expect TEXAS to out talent the 3rd string QB at Kansas.

Edited by lilMAC25
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7 hours ago, Ignatius said:

Man, back before the interGoogles one of my great pleasures in life was waking up Sunday morning, getting baked at my house right by the old airport, rolling by the newspaper machine (look it up kids) that stocked the late-edition Sunday DMN and posting up at Juan In A Million for breakfast and the DMN Sunday sports section. In mid-October that fucking thing was thicker than the phone book in my home town, with a shitload of great writers (whether I agreed with them or not)….

What’s a phone book?

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8 hours ago, Texas Native said:

The news has sucked ass for decades.  Kiss anybodies ass Chuck Fuckhead sports writer he as much as tiny dick kurt bowles should be tied and drug behind the lil cheat fucksticks wagon while waiting to writing the next hit piece on Texas.  Good news these fucktards from the shitting 8 conference as stuck “who’s in our league the weeks version of pulp fiction.”  So lube up the lil 12/10/16 get your magic underwear everyone in the gay lord family ass salute lincoln fuck norman riley for a gang bang at the athletic dorm!

YOU’RE WELCOME…

If you wanna get down, get down on the ground, cocaine...

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14 hours ago, Texas Native said:

The news has sucked ass for decades.  Kiss anybodies ass Chuck Fuckhead sports writer he as much as tiny dick kurt bowles should be tied and drug behind the lil cheat fucksticks wagon while waiting to writing the next hit piece on Texas.  Good news these fucktards from the shitting 8 conference as stuck “who’s in our league the weeks version of pulp fiction.”  So lube up the lil 12/10/16 get your magic underwear everyone in the gay lord family ass salute lincoln fuck norman riley for a gang bang at the athletic dorm!

YOU’RE WELCOME…

Steve Brule GIF by MOODMAN

who is that GIF

 

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14 hours ago, Texas Native said:

The news has sucked ass for decades.  Kiss anybodies ass Chuck Fuckhead sports writer he as much as tiny dick kurt bowles should be tied and drug behind the lil cheat fucksticks wagon while waiting to writing the next hit piece on Texas.  Good news these fucktards from the shitting 8 conference as stuck “who’s in our league the weeks version of pulp fiction.”  So lube up the lil 12/10/16 get your magic underwear everyone in the gay lord family ass salute lincoln fuck norman riley for a gang bang at the athletic dorm!

YOU’RE WELCOME…

Anyone here a Najavo code breaker?

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2 hours ago, South Austin said:

Anyone here a Najavo code breaker?

Hmmmm… let me see:

 

“The media coverage for our schools football program has not been stellar for over a decade. Generic sports writers, including “negative Nancys” like AAS reporter Kirk Bohls, should hilariously be tied behind the OU Chuck Wagon as it parades before a game whilst they are waiting to unfairly badmouth UT. It is beneficial the media reporters from the remaining 8 schools are worried about who’s joining them after we leave since it is mostly flights of fancy. So, prepare for another season like 2016 and join me in closeted homosexual mockery of Lincoln Riley for his victory over us.”

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On 1/19/2022 at 3:36 PM, C-Man said:

I don't have many connections at all but could see this coming from a mile away once the initial reports that there was mutual interest came out around NSD1.

I think @closetohumping called it first...

On 11/16/2019 at 9:43 PM, closetohumping said:

You ready to see Gary Patterson in a burnt orange extra medium dry fit shirt?

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23 hours ago, Tex Long said:

Here's how badly we've misjudged Gary Patterson all these years: it turns out those were never sweat towels. They were cold towels, soaked in ice water, run through a wringer, rolled up and kept in an ice box on the sideline. What we thought was sweat flying, was actually the cold water from the towels. 

The cold towel seems to have been created in Alabama, shortly after the invention of either the towel or cold water, no one seems to be clear about which.

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32 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

Talker. Code talker. They weren't braking or breaking, just talking Navajo, of  which apparently the Nipponese had no knowleedge.

To make it worse for the Nips, there were also Sioux/Lakota code talkers as well as those from other tribes. People tend to think exclusively of the Navajo since that was what was portrayed in the book/movie.

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On 1/10/2022 at 7:21 AM, TreatyOak said:

An apology:

Many of our posts about the former TCU coach were designed to stimulate discussion amongst Surly viewers who choose to participate. While we never intended to hurt anyone, we acknowledge that some of our posts have gone too far in regards to referencing the character, weight and intelligence of former TCU coach Gary Patterson.

We would like to apologize to anyone that may have been offended by these posts. We are very, very sorry and we know that we can do much better. Character, weight, sweatiness and intelligence remain serious issues in America today and our intention as never to hurt anyone or any coach. We know that we have a lot to learn and we need to do better in reaching out to the Gary Patterson community.

We must stop denying the existence of individual and systemic/institutional coach hatred in America. These issues exist, and are still at work to keep former TCU coaches marginalized. Thank you and again, we are very, very sorry.

 

OLYMPUS-DIGITAL-CAMERA.jpg

untrustworthy-lying-business-man-fingers

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Now that it is official I am trying to figure out what would be the best outcome. I don’t think he can teach Sark how to run a top program because Sark has seen plenty of that already. One thing is to see and emulate behaviors versus being someone that has shown they can run a high performing program versus peers. Sark has been unable to replicate what he learned from Pete and Saban. Hopefully Gary gets folks to get what he did to go undefeated done here.

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  • immamac changed the title to Phatterson

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