Modern family size

[Sgt Hulk 13,484]

Catholic family here. I have 7 aunts and uncles and about 30 cousins.    I got snipped after 2 cuz fuck these damn kids 

[StruggleBus 3,922]

13 hours ago, aggie08 said:

I won't go as far as to say that that's a war crime, but seriously fuck those people. (Hopefully your wife wants no part of that bullshit.)

Fuck those people for having kids? Or do you mean those people were seriously fucking all them time?

[Parliament 13,979]

If you're turning out healthy, intelligent children who will make the World a better place, it's your responsibility to make lots of them.

['stache 21,490]

My parents each have 7 siblings. They had just me and my sister. They are staunchly Mexican Catholic like their parents. My conclusion is that they had sex twice in their lifetimes, and based on our birthdays, it was their wedding anniversary.

[Js1 82,364]

11 hours ago, hookemATL said:

You should have to eat every third baby to help keep things sustainable. 

[Guest]

[MNLonghornFUKM 8,780]

[Guest]

Both of my  parents came from families with 2 children, in the late 30's.  Wife's parents both came from families with 3 kids.

My wife and I are both the 3rd of 3 children in our respective families.

We have 2 boys. Would have almost certainly tried for a 3rd kid, with the wife really wanting a daughter.  Alas, endometriosis sucks badly, so her uterus fell out... or, um...she had a hysterectomy.

My oldest bro has 0 kids. Middle brother has a daughter.  Wife's sister has 1 son, and her brother has 2 girls.  

Survey says:  we all went smaller than the 3 kid families we grew up in.

Edited October 3, 2020 by slorch

[Murfdogg21 4,394]

5 hours ago, Parliament said:

If you're turning out healthy, intelligent children who will make the World a better place, it's your responsibility to make lots of them.

I, a PhD in engineering, “joked” about this with my PhD Engineer wife, including the Idiocracy example. But we waited until I was almost 37 before our first kid so we are probably done at two boys. We have talked about possibly adopting one or two later, but that does not spread the superior genomes in the face of being overrun by the offspring of the poorest and/or least intelligent of America. 

[clapclapclap 8,998]

19 hours ago, Harrison Stafford said:

All those big Cathaholic families have rhythm.

 

[XYZ 2,154]

23 hours ago, closetohumping said:

But, just met a colleague with 7 kids.  I was astonished, but is that really a lot?

You are asking if having 7 kids is a lot?

[Scheiss Meister 8,300]

My wife and I stopped after two because we didn't want to be outnumbered.  We both have three siblings, and we knew what we did to our parents.

[gsoda3 3,187]

We have four. We both wanted a big family. I only have 1 sibling, my wife has 3. I wouldn't mind having a few more but I hate the diaper/spoon feeding routine. Wife's always wanted to foster or adopt so we'll probably do that when the kids get older.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,765]

I have four, but two are rescues.

[workswithseed 2,012]

25 minutes ago, gsoda3 said:

We have four. We both wanted a big family. I only have 1 sibling, my wife has 3. I wouldn't mind having a few more but I hate the diaper/spoon feeding routine. Wife's always wanted to foster or adopt so we'll probably do that when the kids get older.

God yeah!

[Sandman 3,399]

My dad was one of four, my mom was one of three (but one died as an infant). They stopped at 2, my sister and I each had 2. I had twins and when the doc said the chances of having twins again was 50%, I said fuck that and got snipped.

[ImissWallyPryor 9,044]

On 10/2/2020 at 3:01 PM, closetohumping said:

just met a colleague with 7 kids.

Brett, is that you?

[ImissWallyPryor 9,044]

On 10/2/2020 at 3:13 PM, Incredulity said:

Yes it is.  I have 3.  God bless those people. They just have to be numb.

 

We have 4. Three are girls which - in our opinion - is more trying than the sheer number. 

My wife and I agree that 0 to 1 was the most difficult (for obvious reasons), then 2 to 3 (we became outnumbered).  Going from 1 to 2 and then 3 to 4 were surprisingly easy.

My mom was 1 of 2 (shitty parents...both of them) and my dad was the last of 5. He always felt like he was an oops! baby.

The ironic thing about my mom’s shitty mother (who gave her up to her sister when my mom was 9 or 10) was that she eventually ended up in Cleveland and did some modeling on the side. The ad agencies thought she looked so much like the perfect grandmother that they portrayed her as such in an ad on the back of the Cleveland phone book back in the late 70s or early 80s. We rarely saw her as we grew up, so my 2 sisters and I always referred to her as Grandma Far Away.

Edited October 4, 2020 by ImissWallyPryor

[BehoId, The Underminer! 11,486]

On 10/3/2020 at 12:35 PM, Murfdogg21 said:

I, a PhD in engineering, “joked” about this with my PhD Engineer wife, including the Idiocracy example. But we waited until I was almost 37 before our first kid so we are probably done at two boys. We have talked about possibly adopting one or two later, but that does not spread the superior genomes in the face of being overrun by the offspring of the poorest and/or least intelligent of America. 

bang someone on the side.  your wife will understand.

[gernblansten 3,113]

On 10/2/2020 at 4:04 PM, Errestaurants said:

My ranch is located next to a large Mennonite community and I'm friendly with two of the families. They each have 10 kids. One has 9 boys and 1 girl and the other has 10 daughters. They both get a lot of shit accomplished around their small farmsteads and will come over and help me when asked.

Well, that's convenience, but one of those 10 daughters is going to get left out when they pair up.

[Guest Lobo]

We had kind of a modern family before it was cool.  Dad had one son from his previous marriage, my mom had two daughters from her previous marriage.  They met, married, and had me.  My older half-brother was raised by his mother/step-dad in another family, my two half-sisters and me were raised by my parents until parents divorced when I was 8 or 9.  I am significantly younger than all of them, but because I helped look after my middle sister with Down's Syndrome---I'm not really the baby just a weird middle child.  My brother and I didn't even meet each other until I was 14 and we became closer after my father died.  My father married and divorced a total of 5 times during his 63 year old life, despite his parents being married for nearly 70 years.  Mom came from a family of 9, 7 of which are now dead.  My father came from 4.  

My wife came from 4 girls, and we have two little girls ourselves.  Her mom came from a family of 6, all girls.  So there's a trend there somewhere As the 5 women in my mom's family produced 8 girls between them and only two boys.  But her side is all German Catholic farmers so they were putting out kids like Ford put out cars back in the day.  But my wife and I reasoned very simply, humbly, and early on that when we are gone, there should be two left in our place.  So we have the two.  It took awhile with lots of setbacks, but they're here.  The world doesn't need any more Lobo's, but the two I am leaving in my place are Aces.  

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,765]

30 minutes ago, gernblansten said:

Well, that's convenience, but one of those 10 daughters is going to get left out when they pair up.

Just need one lesbian couple

[Murfdogg21 4,394]

1 hour ago, gernblansten said:

Well, that's convenience, but one of those 10 daughters is going to get left out when they pair up.

One of the dudes can do two Amish chicks at the same time. 

[closetohumping 17,258]

1 hour ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Just need one lesbian couple

10% of the population is gay.  It's true.

[Guest Lobo]

3 minutes ago, Murfdogg21 said:

One of the dudes can do two Amish chicks at the same time. 

Dibs on “Amish Threesome” for my alt.acoustic band name.  

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,765]

4 minutes ago, Murfdogg21 said:

One of the dudes can do two Amish chicks at the same time. 

While I'm sure that would be fun, it wouldn't help out the Mennonite family with 10 daughters

[Deej 76,081]

On 10/3/2020 at 7:28 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I have four, but two are rescues.

 

[Nice Guy Eddie 13,269]

On 10/3/2020 at 9:49 AM, slorch said:

Phillip Rivers obviously has the financial means to care for 8 kids but I would question if he and his wife have the time to really care for them. I mean they can hire many nannies but there is zero chance he and his wife really understand each one or get to know that many kids.

Is the point of having kids so that they have non-parents raise them? 

[Neonmoon 38,126]

1 minute ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

Phillip Rivers obviously has the financial means to care for 8 kids but I would question if he and his wife have the time to really care for them. I mean they can hire many nannies but there is zero chance he and his wife really understand each one or get to know that many kids.

Is the point of having kids so that they have non-parents raise them? 

Can anyone really raise 8 kids? And that statement is not, 'don't have 8 kids', it means that even in a rural farm where you have 8 kids and everyone is always together under the same roof, helping on the farm, etc., a lot of the older kids will be helping with the younger kids, helping raise them. 8 charges is just too much for two people, you're going to need help from the other kids. 

[Doc Reeves 6,434]

“Nobody should have 8 kids, I know because my mom is one of 7 and there are 2 uncles we don’t talk to” -Chris Porter

[Guest]

8 kids in youth sports/ music lessons/ scouts/ dance/ etc makes my head hurt.

My grandmother had 6 sisters and they all turned out great. IDK what a realistic number is for every couple. Some can handle 7-8 kids.  Some should have zero. 
 

Have observed more than a handful of couples who were absolutely getting worked over by their one kid. 

Edited October 8, 2020 by slorch

[davidg 4,015]

On 10/3/2020 at 9:49 AM, slorch said:

 

[Paper_jam 819]

Based on my neighborhood, you'd never know families are getting smaller. 20 years ago, each house had one or two cars in the garage, and maybe a car in the driveway. Now it's typical for a house to have 3-4 cars in the driveway and 2 more cars parked on the street in front. And probably a boat or trailer somewhere for good measure. These were supposed to be "starter homes" for young couples and singles. 

 

Edited October 8, 2020 by Paper_jam

[Surly Bevo 24,247]

On 10/3/2020 at 9:49 AM, slorch said:

Looks like Rivers likes to throw a lot more routes to the X than to the Y

[SHOOTER12 8,766]

On 10/2/2020 at 5:11 PM, Harrison Stafford said:

All those big Cathaholic families have a lack of rhythm.

Fify

[kmac30 416]

I know a family that decided to have as many kids as they could handle after their first or second was born with Downs. They want to make sure he has someone to take care of him when they pass away. Right now I think they have 6. I don’t know their financial status and hate to assume, but I’m pretty sure things are tight.

 

And to add, we have 3 (one set of twins). We had always talked about 3 or 4 and after twins, put a lid on it. A few years ago, as things were getting easier, we discussed another but we could never pull the trigger.

[Guest Lobo]

On 10/3/2020 at 9:49 AM, slorch said:

Am I the only one that thought this was Slorch's family for a few days?  I don't remember who the fuck Phillip Rivers is/was, let alone can pick him out of a beach lineup.  I just saw his post this with no caption and thought, "Wow, he's a salty bastard.  But that's a really nice looking family IRL...good on him."  

And going back to the posts on Catholic Rhythm.  I've been in some strange rooms and seen some strange shit in my time.  But wife and I had to attend this 3-day Catholic retreat so I could be married in her church as a hedonistic Lutheran-Jew.  Anyway, last day of the retreat, a married couple comes in to talk to us about the Rhythm Method and working towards God's plans for our family growth.  They're about our age and go through the whole thing with spreadsheets and Power Point.  We get to the end of their presentation which is basically no abortion, no birth control, and give God all the kids you can until you're dead.  Then they reveal their backgrounds...they are both Evolutionary Biologists.  I was the only person in the room of 100 who cackled.  I thought I was on "Candid Camera."  My wife is still pissed off at me to this day for chuckling at that.  I mean...Evolutionary Biologists teaching young Catholic couples about God's plan?  What the fuck?  I still crack up.  /csb

[Chewbacca 7,612]

Friend of mine had 4 kids and they wanted one more.  Got natural triplets.  Now he has to drive one of those huge vans if they want to go somewhere together.  Fuck that noise.

[Guest Lobo]

There are only two ways to get 7 kids into your old van.  He did it the right way.  I say, good for him.

Edited October 12, 2020 by Lobo

[BabaYaga 15,116]

Buddy I used to work with.  Had been trying since college.  Nada.  Zilch.  Spent close to 6-figures adopting these two amazing little girls from Russia.  Sisters.  Absolutely the sweetest girls ever.  Whole thing was shady as all get out.  Being told on a Tuesday they need you in Moscow on Friday.  That only "new bills" would do.  How to get the money into the country without alarming customs.  But it worked out and they are great.

Then......defying the earlier notion that her "insides were a rocky place where his seed could find no dwelling"

Babies 3, 4 and 5 popped out.  So now they have five.  And I laugh at him every time I see his haggard ass and his minivan.  

[Guest Lobo]

Glad it worked out for his haggard ass.  I know what serious setbacks are like in trying to start a family, not as many years as him but I've been there.  But I have to say, if I was told I had 3 days to get $90,000 in new bills cash and smuggle it into Russia...I'd probably just hang back and cut a deal with a pregnant girl outside an abortion clinic in Toledo.  God bless his wife for going through that shady shit.  

But I absolutely believe, and science backs me up, that just sometimes the psychological effect of being around little ones can cause the body to finally perk up and get fertile.  That would explain #3-#5 for your buddy. Kinda happened with us, after years of miscarriages and issues, wife quit avoiding kids (we kinda did for a couple years because it depressed us).  But then one day we just started hanging with friends and neighbors and family members with little kids again.  Tried for a whopping two months, and first girl was born.  Second one happened after just two months of trying as well.   Wife is bummed out because two of her three sisters are getting very close to being past their child-rearing ages (42 & 39) and she thought that having them spend time around our girls might help them psychologically.  But of course Covid-19 said "fuck you, no visits this year"  Meanwhile all her cousins back in rural Kansas that all live near one another and see each other's little ones, they all can't stop breeding.  My wife comes from four girls and they've produced two kids, our little girls.  Meanwhile (we lost count last year), her ~20 cousins (all back in Kansas) have had something like 65 children between them.  I think it's partially due to being around that fertile vibe all the time.  

I've noticed nobody really debates birth control anymore.  It's kinda been more normalized in the last 15 years or so, IMO.  

[BabaYaga 15,116]

2 hours ago, Lobo said:

I know what serious setbacks are like in trying to start a family, not as many years as him but I've been there.  But I have to say, if I was told I had 3 days to get $90,000 in new bills cash and smuggle it into Russia...I'd probably just hang back and cut a deal with a pregnant girl outside an abortion clinic in Toledo.  God bless his wife for going through that shady shit.  

Yeah, it was weird.  Never more than $10K at a time for obvious customs issues.  Then you had to make your way from the airport, to the hotel, to wherever with this fresh, new cash - that was the big issue.  Being in the streets of Moscow with a little under ten grand plus the cost of the those last minute airline tickets.

But like I said it worked out and the girls are great.  

2 hours ago, Lobo said:

But I absolutely believe, and science backs me up, that just sometimes the psychological effect of being around little ones can cause the body to finally perk up and get fertile. 

I think it was stress.  No longer stressed about being able to have kids, the social stigma, etc.  Plus their "Amazing Race, Moscow Edition" put things into perspective.  I think she just loosened up physically and psychologically.  But who knows.  Then POP, POP, POP....three more!  

[Guest]

4 hours ago, BabaYaga said:

Buddy I used to work with.  Had been trying since college.  Nada.  Zilch.  Spent close to 6-figures adopting these two amazing little girls from Russia.  Sisters.  Absolutely the sweetest girls ever.  Whole thing was shady as all get out.  Being told on a Tuesday they need you in Moscow on Friday.  That only "new bills" would do.  How to get the money into the country without alarming customs.  But it worked out and they are great.

Then......defying the earlier notion that her "insides were a rocky place where his seed could find no dwelling"

Babies 3, 4 and 5 popped out.  So now they have five.  And I laugh at him every time I see his haggard ass and his minivan.  

Not quite the Russia story, but best friend growing up was the 2nd of two adopted boys( not bio related,) because their parents thought they couldn't have any kids.

3 natural kids later, they had 5 kids total and had to go everywhere in an old school suburban( way before mini vans.

[Guest Lobo]

I would imagine, smuggling U.S. currency through the streets of Moscow probably gave them a great heightened-stress story to share later, that may have led to 3-5.  

Hell, I remind my wife of some of the shit we pulled in Central America when we were young and insane, and it gets her all kinds of turned on.  But that can't compete with international currency trafficking with human lives on the line. 

You're right, it's a "dropping the stress" thing.  The problem with so many couples unfortunately is like yelling "Calm Down" to somebody who's in duress.  It doesn't work, it just makes things worse.  You can't tell a woman who's experiencing either infertility or miscarriages (or godforbid, both), "Just don't worry about it anymore, don't stress out."  That has the opposite effect in most cases.  But if they can thread that needle of finally dropping their self-placed stress and realize they beat themselves up about it more than society ever could, they can sometimes unlock a lot of fertility.  Happened for us, happened for your friend, happens many times every day around the world.  For that I am thankful to God and Mother Nature.  

All that sappy shit to say, if you already have like 4 kids.  Just fucking stop.  We're fine.  Planet's all set.  Try anal from now on. 

[Covri 6,138]

On 10/4/2020 at 11:21 AM, ImissWallyPryor said:

We have 4. Three are girls which - in our opinion - is more trying than the sheer number. 

My wife and I agree that 0 to 1 was the most difficult (for obvious reasons), then 2 to 3 (we became outnumbered).  Going from 1 to 2 and then 3 to 4 were surprisingly easy.

My mom was 1 of 2 (shitty parents...both of them) and my dad was the last of 5. He always felt like he was an oops! baby.

The ironic thing about my mom’s shitty mother (who gave her up to her sister when my mom was 9 or 10) was that she eventually ended up in Cleveland and did some modeling on the side. The ad agencies thought she looked so much like the perfect grandmother that they portrayed her as such in an ad on the back of the Cleveland phone book back in the late 70s or early 80s. We rarely saw her as we grew up, so my 2 sisters and I always referred to her as Grandma Far Away.

 

I thought one was easy and having the second has been much harder. No longer 2 on 1. I have two boys one just turned 2 a couple months back and the other will be 5 in a couple months. The younger ones favorite word is “no” lol.
 

 

[Nice Guy Eddie 13,269]

I know you have to declare over $10K to customs flying in or out of the US, but is there really a problem if you declare it? 

[Guest Lobo]

13 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

I know you have to declare over $10K to customs flying in or out of the US, but is there really a problem if you declare it? 

there is a problem flying out with that kinda cash if you're a 30-something year old male with an alarmingly recent timestamp on your 1-way ticket to RUSSIA and your wife is mumbling the whole time in the security line, "Oh, I hope the girls we get are cute with colorful eyes and curly hair."  That's gonna raise some eyebrows outbound...

Edited October 12, 2020 by Lobo

[BabaYaga 15,116]

15 hours ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

I know you have to declare over $10K to customs flying in or out of the US, but is there really a problem if you declare it? 

As stated, it's not customs you have to really worry about, it's gangs/crime.  At the time, the country was essentially the wild west.  That was what they were coached on, how to navigate the city with all that cash.  Declaring large amounts of cash.....will make it's way back to others.  Little birds, loose lips.  You get the picture.