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Processed/packaged/canned foods you love


Butch Had Not

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1 hour ago, Loco said:

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These are amazing.  They changed them recently.  You don’t have to proof them overnight. Just throw them in frozen.  They need to bake ~10 min longer but you’re not screwed if you forget to take them out the night before.  Better than any bakery’s croissants.

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The 1980s MRE Pork Patty meal.

For those of you who did not experience it, At Ease, I'll Be On The Planet All Day. Now men, imagine giving a hobo some saltines to chew up and spit into a pot of hot lard. Now stir in some vacuum-cleaner lint, and when it boils down semi-solid, form it into a square patty, then pray to some Sumerian Demon to come zap all the moisture out of it until it squeaks like styrofoam when you bite into it.

That was the MRE Pork Patty.

The trick was to grab some other MRE than the Pork Patty, didn't matter which. You'll know who got stuck with the Pork Patty MRE because they will warble their woe. That's when you offer to trade. Not a straight-up trade, because c'mon, Pork Patty. With a little diplomacy you would get the entire Pork Patty, plus extra candy, poguey bait, whatever there was to be had. You'd get two meals worth.

I guess you could have thrown away the actual Pork Patty and still eaten well with the winnings, but not me, I loved that Pork Patty. Hit it with that mini-Tabasco bottle. Like eating a scab off a mummy's asshole. MMM.

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1 hour ago, Deej said:

Bugles.

Once in a fit of ingenuity only brought on by hunger and lack of saltines, I used bugles to scoop jalapeño pimiento cheese out of the container.  I’ve never been the same.  It nestles nicely down inside the bugle and makes a sweet savory compliment to the salty crunch of the bugle delivery vehicle.  

Edited by Judge Roybeanbag
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On 12/16/2018 at 3:04 PM, RDCanecutter said:

The 1980s MRE Pork Patty meal.

For those of you who did not experience it, At Ease, I'll Be On The Planet All Day. Now men, imagine giving a hobo some saltines to chew up and spit into a pot of hot lard. Now stir in some vacuum-cleaner lint, and when it boils down semi-solid, form it into a square patty, then pray to some Sumerian Demon to come zap all the moisture out of it until it squeaks like styrofoam when you bite into it.

That was the MRE Pork Patty.

The trick was to grab some other MRE than the Pork Patty, didn't matter which. You'll know who got stuck with the Pork Patty MRE because they will warble their woe. That's when you offer to trade. Not a straight-up trade, because c'mon, Pork Patty. With a little diplomacy you would get the entire Pork Patty, plus extra candy, poguey bait, whatever there was to be had. You'd get two meals worth.

I guess you could have thrown away the actual Pork Patty and still eaten well with the winnings, but not me, I loved that Pork Patty. Hit it with that mini-Tabasco bottle. Like eating a scab off a mummy's asshole. MMM.

Pork patty was the best freaking meal during that time.

It's a dire indictment of the entire catalog.

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I added some leftover chicken/black beans/japs from the night before that kept it from crisping up as well as it probably should have.
It also didn’t help that I burned the living shit out of the roof of my mouth on the first bite, that just pisses you off & will ruin about any meal. 

You have only yourself to blame.
Such is the story of corned beef fans.
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I added some leftover chicken/black beans/japs from the night before that kept it from crisping up as well as it probably should have.
It also didn’t help that I burned the living shit out of the roof of my mouth on the first bite, that just pisses you off & will ruin about any meal. 

You have only yourself to blame.
Such is the story of corned beef fans.
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8 hours ago, spystud13 said:

I added some leftover chicken/black beans/japs

Yuk.  That sounds gross. Not that there's anything wrong with those items, but why would you put them in corned beef hash? The japs I can see but I don't understand the chicken and beans at all. 

The only thing I add is black pepper. And eggs. I don't fry it until it gets real crispy, just until there are some crispy bits. The color changes to a darker reddish-brown. Then I scoop out a hole in the center and toss in a few eggs. I lower the heat and cover the pan until the eggs are cooked, solid whites and runny yolks. I have some large serving plates that will hold all that and I just let it slide out of the pan. 

Sometimes I tell myself I'm going to just eat half a can as a snack and save the rest for later. But by the time it's done cooking, the eggs come out and it's game on. I feel some shame, and a little bit like I'm about to have a heart attack, but damn it tastes good. 

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On 12/8/2018 at 9:13 AM, WhatTheBuck said:

Campbell's Bean with Bacon Soup

 

On 12/8/2018 at 12:35 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

I like to add a sprinkle of thyme a minute or two before taking it off the stove. 

Had this today, good call gents. Added chicken bouillon & Louisiana hot sauce. Will try the hot Rotel suggestion next time. 

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11 minutes ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

Hormel canned beef tamales.
 

 

Old family recipe handed down by my Dad that probably belongs in the Steel Shank thread.

1 large can Hormel tamales

1 can yellow hominy

1 can Wolf Brand chili (no beans, I'll cut a bitch)

shredded cheese

Put the tamales in a Pyrex dish. Add hominy and smother with chili. Bake at 350 for 45 min. Top with cheese as soon as you take it out. Destroy.

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