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Halloween bullshit


Prepuce of Doom

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46 minutes ago, BeardIP said:

Dude what? McSweeney's is consistent gold. 

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Is @BeardIP short for @Beard(edH)IP(STER)?

I'd give you "consistent bronze," and I wouldn't agree but I wouldn't argue with "consistent silver," but "consistent gold" is too much... 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom
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  • 3 weeks later...
On 9/19/2023 at 3:28 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Very low expectations for this year's (well, last year's) new monster. 

As previously reported, someone or something has eaten much of its ass, and not in the good way. There's a real Frank Beamer quality to it now, at least as far as I can tell without disturbing it. 

It kept tipping over and I eventually gave up on propping it up, and I have little faith that it will stand upright very easily or for very long once I extract it from the bushes. 

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But who knows - maybe we'll be pleasantly surprised in a couple of weeks. And the previous two have fared well by spending the offseason in my garage. 

 

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We may be the anti-Cumsteens.

I put three small gourds outside. Three inside. And two small black cobweb votive candles on the kitchen island.

Boo. Humbug.

But I'll probably do more because I do like Halloween. Maybe put out some Phillips Hue lights on the porch or something. Buckets of blood poised over the door, whatever.

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13 hours ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

I located five (FIVE!!?!?!) more storage bins of Halloween shit yesterday. So that's 17 total bins for those of you keeping score at home. I brought all of them the house and put them in the entry way to make it very uncomfortable to navigate around the maze and stacks of them. All of this was a pre-emptive strike to remind my wife of just how much Halloween shit she has and prevent her from buying more. I don't think it's going to work.

Some people just cut a maze out in a field of corn, but brother... I like your style.

56 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

I only get inside decorations for Halloween.

Same. Well, it's what I do now, after 'the Nativity Scene incident'.

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On 10/10/2023 at 11:24 AM, Mitch Cumsteen said:

All of this was a pre-emptive strike to remind my wife of just how much Halloween shit she has and prevent her from buying more. I don't think it's going to work.

It's just going to let her know which stuff she doesn't have yet. And another trip to Target will commence. 

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9 hours ago, gofuckyourself said:

Most popular candies, according to Instacart anyway. Flagrant promotional crap but Florida (Dum-Dums) is quite accurate. Oklahoma needs a recount though.

Texas and Hawaii kinda fancy.

And Mississippi and West Virginia with terrible taste, as expected.

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I agree with you on Mississippi, but WV is pretty solid with peanut butter cups. Or do you not know what WV looks like?

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4 minutes ago, millhouse said:

I agree with you on Mississippi, but WV is pretty solid with peanut butter cups. Or do you not know what WV looks like?

I hurried the throw, very little pressure too.

Then I couldn't edit and hoped no one saw the gaffe.

So let's just all agree to move on and not lose sight of the point that candy corn sucks.

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On 10/16/2023 at 11:05 AM, gofuckyourself said:

Most popular candies, according to Instacart anyway. Flagrant promotional crap but Florida (Dum-Dums) is quite accurate. Oklahoma needs a recount though.

Texas and Hawaii kinda fancy.

And Mississippi and West Virginia with terrible taste, as expected.

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Florida was obvious.

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Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

  1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.
  • Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
  • Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
  • Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
  • We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.
  1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
  2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

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18 minutes ago, Esque said:

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

  1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.
  • Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
  • Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
  • Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
  • We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.
  1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
  2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

If our neighborhood is any indication, trick or treating door-to-door is stronger than ever. Kajillions of kids walking around each year, parents having a great time, decorations everywhere. Honestly I love Halloween -- the one time of year we tell kids to go knock on stranger's doors, because good things are going to happen. Bring it on. 

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18 minutes ago, Esque said:

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

  1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.
  • Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
  • Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
  • Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
  • We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.
  1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
  2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?


Not to get too CR, but housing prices being what they are…. The idea of a whole neighborhood of young families who have kids is something of the past.

Property tax limitation for olds, high prices, wage stagnation lead to shitty halloweens. 
🤷‍♂️

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The two that I don't think are good candidates for immortality are Skittle (the more round of the two) and Milk Dud (the one that looks a little like Marty Feldman).

Fun fact #1: Milk Duds were so named because of their non-uniform and disappointing shape. 

Fun fact #2: Milk Duds are criminally underrated. 

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41 minutes ago, Esque said:

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

  1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.
  • Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
  • Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
  • Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
  • We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.
  1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
  2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

Trunk or treat started as a small town thing where it wasn’t easy for kids to go door to door so they would centralize trick or treating somewhere kids could get a lot of candy in a small area. Naturally it spread to suburbs and cities because it’s way more convenient in many cases. Churches were/are common places to host. Traditional trick or treating day of still exists too and really depends on the neighborhood. Our neighborhood has actually had more young families move in the last couple years so it’s gotten busier than it was five years ago but it’s still probably only a 1/3 house participation. We handed out candy even before kids because we felt like we needed to for the kids and the neighborhood as homeowners. We have two boys now so my wife walks them and I stay back and hand out candy. Both of us doing the walking effectively shut us down from handing out candy because no way I’m leaving a bowl out with a sign, shit half the kids didn’t even listen to take 1-2 pieces from me holding the bowl out and just grab handfuls anyways.  

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As you all may recall, the contrast and detail is difficult to effectively photograph early on, but their true character will emerge with time and exposure. 

It's supposed to get down below freezing the next couple of nights here in Chicago, and we're expecting snow during trick or treating. Not sure whether the chill will hasten or retard the putrification process. 

A few shots of the whole gang and our bird tableau. 

 

 

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Edited by Prepuce of Doom
Putrification, not purification!
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20 minutes ago, Dnaguy said:


Not to get too CR, but housing prices being what they are…. The idea of a whole neighborhood of young families who have kids is something of the past.

Property tax limitation for olds, high prices, wage stagnation lead to shitty halloweens. 
🤷‍♂️

*unless you’ve moved to the newest 500k+ home master planned golf cart community designed for families so you can be around 2000 people who happen to be in the similar tax bracket top 5% types. And an hour outside city center.

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1 hour ago, Covri said:

*unless you’ve moved to the newest 500k+ home master planned golf cart community designed for families so you can be around 2000 people who happen to be in the similar tax bracket top 5% types. And an hour outside city center.

Sad.

I mean, I grew up on a culdesac of houses from 60-100k. We had 10-14 kids all within a 5 year range.

Blue collar. 1st Gen. White collar.

this wasn’t 1953. It was the 90’s.

Home ownership is different now.

I am lucky to have ‘leveled up’. But it’s sad now in  sense.

We ran that street. Adults had to face their differences. We had jahova witnesses, Pentecostals, secular families, black, white, Mexican, India (really!), Phillapino, etc. 

We watched the super bowel together. Played baseball together. Rode bikes together. I am lucky to grow up on that street. My children have opportunities I don’t, but they won’t ever have Misty pines Dr. 
 

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