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Eternals -- Marvel's Next Guardians of the Galaxy? Jolie, Hayek, Jon Snow, Robb Stark, and More


Patrick Bateman

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9 minutes ago, Buzzrock said:


Shang Chi was good and Spider-Man just made $1B. Marvel is fine.

I’d say most on this site weren’t the primary audience for Black Widow. I wonder how it would have done in theaters with no Covid. My daughter loves the movie and is torn between BW and Hawkeye-Kate as here favorite now. 

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Watched it last night....not bad.  I thought I was familiar with most of the Marvel characters...but it was definitely weird not knowing any of these characters until now.  Their names are so random though lol.  Names are kinda funny and not a strong hero name. Sprite?? Gilgamesh?? Droig?? 

I probably would watch a sequel, but not dying to see it.

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2 minutes ago, utxmike05 said:

Watched it last night....not bad.  I thought I was familiar with most of the Marvel characters...but it was definitely weird not knowing any of these characters until now.  Their names are so random though lol.  Names are kinda funny and not a strong hero name. Sprite?? Gilgamesh?? Droig?? 

I probably would watch a sequel, but not dying to see it.

That's what I'm curious about with these comic book movies going forward. People who didn't read the comics knew who Captain America and Thor and Iron Man were. Now that they've kinda used up the mainstream characters, they're digging into the lesser known heroes. I am not a comic book reader and like you, had no idea who most of these characters were. After watching a few review videos on youtube made by people who ARE very familiar with the comics, this shit all made sense to them.  Hell, I didn't even know Blade was a Marvel comic until a couple years ago. 

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1 hour ago, Hmbre97 said:

That's what I'm curious about with these comic book movies going forward. People who didn't read the comics knew who Captain America and Thor and Iron Man were. Now that they've kinda used up the mainstream characters, they're digging into the lesser known heroes. I am not a comic book reader and like you, had no idea who most of these characters were. After watching a few review videos on youtube made by people who ARE very familiar with the comics, this shit all made sense to them.  Hell, I didn't even know Blade was a Marvel comic until a couple years ago. 

Exactly, digging into the bullpen.  And I really do know a lot of characters but not a comic reader either.  Just based on movies, video games, old tv shows, pop culture, etc...  I mean Guardians of Galaxy was new to me when it came out.  

Wife was coming in/out of living room and said she thought it was a spoof of Game of Thrones bc she heard "Sersi" and also saw Jon Snow and King of the North on screen lol.

I only saw one post-movie scene...need to go back and watch the other I guess

 

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sang chi, black widow, and eternals. Lol.
 
It might be end of days for superhero flicks. Or at least we maybe finding the boundary of super hero films. 
if this boundary solidifies, maybe they’ll go back to making more original movies. 
 
or hollywood would double down and just keep rebooting the big names - iron man, capn america, wolverine.  
 
 

Those three were as good or better than much of the MCU lineup like the first two Thor movies, the Iron Man sequels, the Ant Man movies, Age of Ultron, and The Incredible Hulk.
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2 hours ago, PenelopeWitherspoon said:

I would have liked to see it as a series to give more background on what the characters did.  I mean, you had Thena (who turned into Athena and saved Athens), Gilgamesh, etc..  There could have been a lot of character building with a series which a 2 or 2.5 hour movie could not do.  

And while I enjoy Salma Hayek, and Jolie to a lesser extent, they clearly weren't needed.  Save that money, cast somebody else, and spend it elsewhere (or don't).  The most interesting characters were the inventor (Phastos?), Gilgamesh, Quicksilverish, Sersei.  I watched it because it was MCU, not because Salma Hayek or Angelina Jolie were in it.

And we should have had

Spoiler

Jon Snow truly reveal himself as the Black Knight

There actually was plenty of meat for a limited series, and I'm saying this as somebody who would have had it way down their viewing list.

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We watched it last night. It was okay. Definitely on the lower tier. All the criticisms I've seen are valid. Too many characters. Too much going on and a bit of a retread of other movies. Visually, it was great. The Celestials were cool to see on screen and it will be interesting to see how they work them into the MCU. It definitely sets up Galactus.

I had the thought when Sprite was made human, wouldn't Phastos want that as well since he has a husband and child who will grow old but he will outlive them both?

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7 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

Could've been a better movie with a different director. Nothing about the movie flowed, nothing was convincing. Right up there with Thor 2 in mehness.

I agree. It was disjointed. Editing and cutting some scenes would have helped it flow, and putting some flashbacks in a different order. 

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On 1/13/2022 at 8:01 AM, utxmike05 said:

Exactly, digging into the bullpen. 

Eh, that's been true for a while. But that didn't keep, say, Ant-Man from being one of the better MCU characters, because it was well-executed.

On 1/13/2022 at 5:07 PM, Herpa Derpa said:

Bad acting all around, but particularly Keogh and Jolie.

There was nothing wrong with Jolie's acting; the character of Thena is wooden.

On 1/13/2022 at 6:25 AM, utxmike05 said:

Their names are so random though lol.  Names are kinda funny and not a strong hero name. Sprite?? Gilgamesh?? Droig?? 

There's nothing random about their names. Their names are supposed to be similar to characters of epics and myths. The idea being that our myths were based on the Eternals themselves. 

And Gilgamesh is one of the more obvious (The Epic of Gilgamesh.) Phastos is Hephaestus. Thena is Athena (duh). Sersi is Circe. And so on.

On 1/15/2022 at 9:35 AM, mdmost said:

I had the thought when Sprite was made human, wouldn't Phastos want that as well since he has a husband and child who will grow old but he will outlive them both?

The problem Sprite had is that she could never even pretend to have a normal life, because once she failed to age for more than a couple of years, everyone got suspicious of her. At least the rest can pretend they're aging gracefully (or even use makeup). It's too obvious for Sprite.

 

Anyway, overall, I thought the movie was okay. It's not Thor: Ragnarok, but it's not Thor: The Dark World, either.

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On 1/15/2022 at 11:35 AM, mdmost said:

We watched it last night. It was okay. Definitely on the lower tier. All the criticisms I've seen are valid. Too many characters. Too much going on and a bit of a retread of other movies. Visually, it was great. The Celestials were cool to see on screen and it will be interesting to see how they work them into the MCU. It definitely sets up Galactus.

I had the thought when Sprite was made human, wouldn't Phastos want that as well since he has a husband and child who will grow old but he will outlive them both?

 

7 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

Eh, that's been true for a while. But that didn't keep, say, Ant-Man from being one of the better MCU characters, because it was well-executed.

There was nothing wrong with Jolie's acting; the character of Thena is wooden.

There's nothing random about their names. Their names are supposed to be similar to characters of epics and myths. The idea being that our myths were based on the Eternals themselves. 

And Gilgamesh is one of the more obvious (The Epic of Gilgamesh.) Phastos is Hephaestus. Thena is Athena (duh). Sersi is Circe. And so on.

The problem Sprite had is that she could never even pretend to have a normal life, because once she failed to age for more than a couple of years, everyone got suspicious of her. At least the rest can pretend they're aging gracefully (or even use makeup). It's too obvious for Sprite.

 

Anyway, overall, I thought the movie was okay. It's not Thor: Ragnarok, but it's not Thor: The Dark World, either.

Also there's no way to include the actress in a sequel unless they let her character age. 

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1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

There was nothing wrong with Jolie's acting; the character of Thena is wooden.

Agree to disagree. You say the character of Thena is wooden. The film failed to express that to the viewer. As someone unfamiliar with the characters, it just came across as another Jolie personality performance, devoid of depth and substance.

Acceptable wooden acting:

image.thumb.png.cc76888ca70f9c8563d5d3c4d1faa7a0.png

 

 

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On 11/12/2021 at 6:53 PM, GreenspointTexas said:

I went in expecting crap. It wasnt total crap. Watchable, decent plot, decent acting, but sloooowwww.

 

best part of the movie was the Indian Valet guy. Hilarious

Hilarious how his camera got smaller and smaller. I was expecting him to shoot video with his phone when it was all said and done. 

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Threw this on after the Dallas game.  Paused partway through to google eternals, celestials, arishem. Have a better understanding, but a lot of things from the comics are not the same as what they are putting in the MCU. 
 

Then at the end I had to google Eros/star Fox and then Dane whatever.  Black knight doesn’t seem to fit into phase 4. 
 

I think they might lose me if they dive into celestials, the other race of celestials that galactus is, watchers, all these beings. 

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Most of my complaints about it have been mentioned before, but I'll reiterate...

  • Poor casting
  • Poor directing
  • Poor character development
  • So-so writing

I considered the possibility of doing it as a series. 

I might have worked if someone like Jon Favreau was the writer and/or director.  It would have pushed them into a different dimension relative to funding of talent, too.  Rather than a ton of recognizable actors, they cast with talented lesser-knowns.  

In the same vein, when considering a series, I lamented, "Holy crap, I cannot imagine dragging this out to 10 episodes."  However, different writers, directors, and actors would have made it more consumable.  Moreover, you only have to suffer through 45-50 minutes on a "weak" episode.  The worst of the Mandolorian or Boba Fett episodes provided character development value, context value, etc.  Each Eternals episode could have had a standalone thought/idea as needed.

At some point, someone inside Disney gave the green light to a 2+ hour theatrical release.  At that point, they established an acting budget and target cast that would appeal to darn near every demographic.  Gemma Chan is an attractive person and has performed well in other roles, but she was stiff and uninspiring here.  Jolie is an overrated actress and just did not seem to fit.  As noted, Madden as Ikarus - meh.  Nanjiani - with each smile/smirk I saw Silicon Valley.  (BTW - he is cast in the upcoming Obi Wan Kenobi seris).

I do believe it opens up another door in MCU and could be the springboard for some new/different storylines.  Let's hope they clean it up a bit and do a better job at casting and directing.

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I hate every character except for the old Indian guy with the camera, and maybe the speedy mute girl. Everyone else could have died a fiery death and I wouldn't have cared. 

And they obviously made Sprite human so that when she's a foot taller in the sequels there won't be any explaining to do.

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Nitpick but this movie made me think about it: the speedy superheroes would not be able to save people at full speed like that. You’d have whiplash and broken bones and arms pulled out of sockets all over the place. Like the A-Train scene in The Boys.

And if they hit a bug going Mach 1 or whatever they would be killed instantly.

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50 minutes ago, Buzzrock said:

Nitpick but this movie made me think about it: the speedy superheroes would not be able to save people at full speed like that. You’d have whiplash and broken bones and arms pulled out of sockets all over the place. Like the A-Train scene in The Boys.

And if they hit a bug going Mach 1 or whatever they would be killed instantly.

And everyone acted like all of them together have no chance against Icarus, when the Flashette did a pretty good job of beating his ass for a bit.  Hell, I've always wondered how anyone beats the flash or quicksilver.

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On 5/25/2021 at 8:22 AM, Richard Kimball said:

The trailer epitomizes where Disney is with Marvel, now. Hayek was selected as the lead, according to the director, because she's in her fifties, and everyone needs to fight ageism in Hollywood, and because she thought it was time for a Hispanic female super hero.

finally got around to watching this warm turd last night, then went back to read the beginning of the thread again.  thought this ^^ was a funny look back to last may.

did the director call her a lead and say it was about agism and time for a hispanic female super hero, or is this fan fiction?  hayek was in the movie for about 5 minutes and did little super hero-ing.

agree with whomever said madden wasn't right for the part he played.  for all the talk of "what a big cast" it was, it really wasn't.  familiar faces, sure.  but no backbone.  no strong main character to revolve the movie around (like pretty much every marvel movie has).

a different cast and telling of this in a 6-8 episode tv series could've worked, but only because they would've possibly benefitted from showing the eternals living normal human lives, and character studies done well are enjoyable to watch. 

by the end of the pilot, you're caught up to present day, and everyone goes their separate directions.  by episode 4, you start getting the band back together.  because of the timeline jumping, the "rounding everyone up for one mission" was blurred out and seemed fairly insignificant in the movie.

starting the movie with everyone together as a group, all equipped with their individual powers and skills makes for a rough origin story begging for 50 minutes of exposition.

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34 minutes ago, ajax said:

Does Arishem have no gravitational pull or does he have zero mass? Cause his appearance should have caused cataclysmic tidal shifts.

A giant celestial coming out of the Indian Ocean should have set off a worse tsunami than 2004. 

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3 minutes ago, Js1 said:

A giant celestial coming out of the Indian Ocean should have set off a worse tsunami than 2004. 

That was one thing that got me. He got his head and hand above water, and he came from the center of the earth. Shouldn’t that have done sufficient damage to destroy everything?

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10 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

That was one thing that got me. He got his head and hand above water, and he came from the center of the earth. Shouldn’t that have done sufficient damage to destroy everything?

Nah, Off Screen  Dr Strange just held back the waves like in End Game. Deleted Scene only on the Blu Ray 

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5 hours ago, henrygandorf said:

a different cast and telling of this in a 6-8 episode tv series could've worked, but only because they would've possibly benefitted from showing the eternals living normal human lives, and character studies done well are enjoyable to watch.

I would have liked to have seen more about the legends they inspired, rather than a few flashes of them beating Deviants, or Sprite telling a story or two.

That could have been done in 6-8 episodes - maybe give each one 15-20 minutes or so showing their backstory, etc.

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