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elfenix

Trivial things that make you surly

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1 hour ago, elfenix said:

 

problem is when you get two trucks that are electronically governed to within .1 mph of each other and that pass takes 10 minutes. 

 

if you can't or won't go at least 5 mph (10 would be even better) faster than those in the right lane stay the fuck outta the left.

just arm everyone with missiles.

I drove back from Denver on Saturday and truck traffic was very light on I-25.  4 wheel civilians were hogging the left lane like a motherfucker at 5mph or more under the speed limit.

 

I just get sick of everyone bitching about people making a living and busting their hump being the problem or making someone lift from the accelerator for a mile or two,  There's a shit ton of other people who have no fucking business operating a motor vehicle who are allowed to drive.

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16 minutes ago, slorch said:

just arm everyone with missiles.

I drove back from Denver on Saturday and truck traffic was very light on I-25.  4 wheel civilians were hogging the left lane like a motherfucker at 5mph or more under the speed limit.

 

I just get sick of everyone bitching about people making a living and busting their hump being the problem or making someone lift from the accelerator for a mile or two,  There's a shit ton of other people who have no fucking business operating a motor vehicle who are allowed to drive.

and they all need to get the fuck out of the left lane too.

 

though i do get some pleasure when i move back into the right lane like i'm supposed to and pass all the morons camping in the left lane. 

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Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, slorch said:

just arm everyone with missiles.

I drove back from Denver on Saturday and truck traffic was very light on I-25.  4 wheel civilians were hogging the left lane like a motherfucker at 5mph or more under the speed limit.

 

I just get sick of everyone bitching about people making a living and busting their hump being the problem or making someone lift from the accelerator for a mile or two,  There's a shit ton of other people who have no fucking business operating a motor vehicle who are allowed to drive.

You obviously completely ignored a big portion of my contention which was the over jacked, never seen off road, salt life, Browning and Monster energy stickered, 60 light having bubba truck driven by the Nashville living moron that will be tailgating at sub 6 feet while I wait for that truck to get around Elmer and his 1980s truck with a trailer that is 90% over his tongue weight.

So there I am, bubba behind, 18 wheeler in front and Elmer next to me with his wheels about to come off....

On a motorcycle.

Edited by BurntEyes

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something irks me about the phrase 'picking up pennies in front of a steamroller'.

 

i could live my life without having to ever hear or read that again

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47 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

something irks me about the phrase 'picking up pennies in front of a steamroller'.

 

i could live my life without having to ever hear or read that again

That’s the first time I’ve ever seen or heard that phrase. So thanks for that. 

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Posted (edited)
On 7/27/2020 at 6:07 PM, BurntEyes said:

You obviously completely ignored a big portion of my contention which was the over jacked, never seen off road, salt life, Browning and Monster energy stickered, 60 light having bubba truck driven by the Nashville living moron that will be tailgating at sub 6 feet while I wait for that truck to get around Elmer and his 1980s truck with a trailer that is 90% over his tongue weight.

So there I am, bubba behind, 18 wheeler in front and Elmer next to me with his wheels about to come off....

On a motorcycle.

drive better.  Especially on a death machine.  One of the 5 fundamentals of defensive driving is to leave yourself an out.  Back out of the throttle and get to safety.

Sorry for your plight, but you chose it too.

Edited by slorch

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55 minutes ago, slorch said:

drive better.  Especially on a death machine.  One of the 5 fundamentals of defensive driving is to leave yourself an out.  Back out of the throttle and get to safety.

Sorry for your plight, but you chose it too.

Yep if you're on a bike you better be playing defensive driver with your head on a swivel. Nobody else is gonna look out for you, especially when they can't see you. I loved my bike, but wouldn't ride one today, mostly because of cell phones.

There are 2 kinds of bikes, those that have gone down, and those that will go down.

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10 hours ago, slorch said:

drive better.  Especially on a death machine.  One of the 5 fundamentals of defensive driving is to leave yourself an out.  Back out of the throttle and get to safety.

Sorry for your plight, but you chose it too.

Fuck you, negged.

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9 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Yep if you're on a bike you better be playing defensive driver with your head on a swivel. Nobody else is gonna look out for you, especially when they can't see you. I loved my bike, but wouldn't ride one today, mostly because of cell phones.

There are 2 kinds of bikes, those that have gone down, and those that will go down.

That's the entire fucking point clearly lost on both you and slorch.

Normally I can move faster than the follow of traffic to avoid having the truck ride my ass, but fuck tard trucker in the left lane going up hill removes that option.

But the one doing something that is a part of his soul. Enjoying his life, not effecting or hurting anyone. Enjoying a passion of life, is the one at fault. 

It's a shitty take on both your parts and you can both eat a bag of dicks.

This is what the fuck is wrong with this God damn country. 

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4 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

That's the entire fucking point clearly lost on both you and slorch.

Normally I can move faster than the follow of traffic to avoid having the truck ride my ass, but fuck tard trucker in the left lane going up hill removes that option.

But the one doing something that is a part of his soul. Enjoying his life, not effecting or hurting anyone. Enjoying a passion of life, is the one at fault. 

It's a shitty take on both your parts and you can both eat a bag of dicks.

This is what the fuck is wrong with this God damn country. 

You got issues brah get helpYou got issues bro get help

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Posted (edited)
36 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

You got issues brah get helpYou got issues bro get help

Naw.. I just solved for both.

There is a solution for people that choose to argue with folk expressing trivial things that piss them off in the lulz sub and the Trivial Things That Piss You Off thread.

Edited by BurntEyes

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16 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

That's the entire fucking point clearly lost on both you and slorch.

Normally I can move faster than the follow of traffic to avoid having the truck ride my ass, but fuck tard trucker in the left lane going up hill removes that option.

But the one doing something that is a part of his soul. Enjoying his life, not effecting or hurting anyone. Enjoying a passion of life, is the one at fault. 

It's a shitty take on both your parts and you can both eat a bag of dicks.

This is what the fuck is wrong with this God damn country. 

This take is bad and you should feel bad.

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Sending people (specifically smarty pants women) a turnkey bid to do work.  They accept after asking a myriad of questions which I answer to their satisfaction and then they sign on the dotted line.  We complete the work and invoice them per the contract.  Contract says "payment due upon completion" but payment is not made upon completion nor within a reasonable amount of time afterward.  Several weeks go by and a few phone calls are made with no answer by or return call from the customer.

Finally the customer answers the phone and is asked if there is a problem with making payment.

(now the fun stuff starts)

Customer (usually a  smarty pants woman):  Uh, yes,  I got your invoice.

Me: Is there a problem with the work?

Customer:  No. It looks great.  We couldn't be happier!

Me:  OK.  When can we excpet payment?

Customer:  Well.........I was looking at your invoice and I wanted to know why it is for so much money?  It seems too expensive.

Me:  The invoice is for the amount stated in and agreed to per contract and evidenced by your signature accepting the scope of work and the price.

Customer:  Well.....it still seems too expensive to me.

Me:  Then why did you accept and sign the contract then let us complete the work to your satisfaction and then complain about the price?

Customer: It just seems too expensive.  Can you "break it down for me?"  

Me:  "Break it down?"  What does that mean?

Customer:  You know...how much did the material cost, how much was the labor and how much did you make?

Me:  No. Pay me.

Customer:  I need to know how much you're making becuase this just seems too expensive.

Me:  <facepalm>

 

 

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3 minutes ago, deadshank said:

Customer:  You know...how much did the material cost, how much was the labor and how much did you make?

Fuck every thing about that. I FUCKING HATE when customers do that.

I've worked hard to work with my vendors to supply materials that are good quality & negotiated prices based on volume, etc. It's none of your business what I pay.

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On 7/17/2020 at 6:20 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

Keep driving when you can't see past your windshield? That's what you would do?

Brilliant. Darwin might have a rain storm in store for you. 

Better check the wreath fund

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Fuck every thing about that. I FUCKING HATE when customers do that.

I've worked hard to work with my vendors to supply materials that are good quality & negotiated prices based on volume, etc. It's none of your business what I pay.

Yep.  a bid is a bid, as long as quality of materials is part of the consideration for the customer.

 

If they're just being a pain in the ass like Deadshank's scenario, then fuck that.

Edited by slorch

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On 7/27/2020 at 6:07 PM, BurntEyes said:

You obviously completely ignored a big portion of my contention which was the over jacked, never seen off road, salt life, Browning and Monster energy stickered, 60 light having bubba truck driven by the Nashville living moron that will be tailgating at sub 6 feet while I wait for that truck to get around Elmer and his 1980s truck with a trailer that is 90% over his tongue weight.

So there I am, bubba behind, 18 wheeler in front and Elmer next to me with his wheels about to come off....

On a motorcycle.

 

On 7/29/2020 at 7:47 AM, Onboard 2.0 said:

Yep if you're on a bike you better be playing defensive driver with your head on a swivel. Nobody else is gonna look out for you, especially when they can't see you. I loved my bike, but wouldn't ride one today, mostly because of cell phones.

There are 2 kinds of bikes, those that have gone down, and those that will go down.

These are perfect examples of why I quit riding in my mid twenties.  You couldn't get me to ride one on a highway these days for a million bucks.

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19 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

You got issues brah get helpYou got issues bro get help

Hell don't we all...

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2 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Hell don't we all...

'Zactly, that's why I'm able to recognize it so easily in others.

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2 hours ago, deadshank said:

Sending people (specifically smarty pants women) a turnkey bid to do work.  They accept after asking a myriad of questions which I answer to their satisfaction and then they sign on the dotted line.  We complete the work and invoice them per the contract.  Contract says "payment due upon completion" but payment is not made upon completion nor within a reasonable amount of time afterward.  Several weeks go by and a few phone calls are made with no answer by or return call from the customer.

Finally the customer answers the phone and is asked if there is a problem with making payment.

(now the fun stuff starts)

Customer (usually a  smarty pants woman):  Uh, yes,  I got your invoice.

Me: Is there a problem with the work?

Customer:  No. It looks great.  We couldn't be happier!

Me:  OK.  When can we excpet payment?

Customer:  Well.........I was looking at your invoice and I wanted to know why it is for so much money?  It seems too expensive.

Me:  The invoice is for the amount stated in and agreed to per contract and evidenced by your signature accepting the scope of work and the price.

Customer:  Well.....it still seems too expensive to me.

Me:  Then why did you accept and sign the contract then let us complete the work to your satisfaction and then complain about the price?

Customer: It just seems too expensive.  Can you "break it down for me?"  

Me:  "Break it down?"  What does that mean?

Customer:  You know...how much did the material cost, how much was the labor and how much did you make?

Me:  No. Pay me.

Customer:  I need to know how much you're making becuase this just seems too expensive.

Me:  <facepalm>

 

 

That is NOT trivial.

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1 hour ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

'Zactly, that's why I'm able to recognize it so easily in others.

tenor.gif.b150a763aa5680c3f4b3152e184915b0.gifCompleteSaneDrake-size_restricted.gif.247faf06501541af8756f75bcd9e850c.gif

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...when there are two drive thru lanes but the first has a car so you opt for the empty second.  As you wait,the first lane car pulls forward, your still waiting (though you've notified them of your presence), and then another car orders orders from the first lane and also passes you by.  All i wanted was a fucking drink!  A bit surly i get. 

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Sending people (specifically smarty pants women) a turnkey bid to do work.  They accept after asking a myriad of questions which I answer to their satisfaction and then they sign on the dotted line.  We complete the work and invoice them per the contract.  Contract says "payment due upon completion" but payment is not made upon completion nor within a reasonable amount of time afterward.  Several weeks go by and a few phone calls are made with no answer by or return call from the customer.
Finally the customer answers the phone and is asked if there is a problem with making payment.
(now the fun stuff starts)
Customer (usually a  smarty pants woman):  Uh, yes,  I got your invoice.
Me: Is there a problem with the work?
Customer:  No. It looks great.  We couldn't be happier!
Me:  OK.  When can we excpet payment?
Customer:  Well.........I was looking at your invoice and I wanted to know why it is for so much money?  It seems too expensive.
Me:  The invoice is for the amount stated in and agreed to per contract and evidenced by your signature accepting the scope of work and the price.
Customer:  Well.....it still seems too expensive to me.
Me:  Then why did you accept and sign the contract then let us complete the work to your satisfaction and then complain about the price?
Customer: It just seems too expensive.  Can you "break it down for me?"  
Me:  "Break it down?"  What does that mean?
Customer:  You know...how much did the material cost, how much was the labor and how much did you make?
Me:  No. Pay me.
Customer:  I need to know how much you're making becuase this just seems too expensive.
Me: 
 
 
Ha, I'm going to have my wife do this shit when you guys work on my house.

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Seriously though, I don't know how you guys put up with asshole customers. My brother designs pools and the stories he tells me are insane.

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1 hour ago, Okie State said:

Seriously though, I don't know how you guys put up with asshole customers. My brother designs pools and the stories he tells me are insane.

Most are fine, well adjusted people.   Some are unhappy shysters.  

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Posted (edited)

Fuck Saran Wrap in the goatass. 

It's a handy material for sure, but every goddamn time you use it is such a goddamn beating that "eh, good enough" is a huge relief to eventually achieve. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

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2 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

People who have no Saran Wrap game. 

Right? 60s housewives are laughing over jello salad.

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I'm a paid subscriber to mlb.tv and there's a 15 sec ad in front of every fucking video, even those little 30 sec single highlight vids and there's no way to skip it.  If you want to make the poors that don't pay for a subscription sit through ads all day, fine.  But don't make those of us that are paying for it suffer as well.

Trivial, you bet.  Surly af, damn straight.  Checks all the boxes.

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11 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I hope the inventor of Saran Wrap shares the same space in hell with whoever designs toy packaging

Blister packaging in general....

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On 7/30/2020 at 10:35 AM, deadshank said:

Sending people (specifically smarty pants women) a turnkey bid to do work.  They accept after asking a myriad of questions which I answer to their satisfaction and then they sign on the dotted line.  We complete the work and invoice them per the contract.  Contract says "payment due upon completion" but payment is not made upon completion nor within a reasonable amount of time afterward.  Several weeks go by and a few phone calls are made with no answer by or return call from the customer.

Finally the customer answers the phone and is asked if there is a problem with making payment.

(now the fun stuff starts)

Customer (usually a  smarty pants woman):  Uh, yes,  I got your invoice.

Me: Is there a problem with the work?

Customer:  No. It looks great.  We couldn't be happier!

Me:  OK.  When can we excpet payment?

Customer:  Well.........I was looking at your invoice and I wanted to know why it is for so much money?  It seems too expensive.

Me:  The invoice is for the amount stated in and agreed to per contract and evidenced by your signature accepting the scope of work and the price.

Customer:  Well.....it still seems too expensive to me.

Me:  Then why did you accept and sign the contract then let us complete the work to your satisfaction and then complain about the price?

Customer: It just seems too expensive.  Can you "break it down for me?"  

Me:  "Break it down?"  What does that mean?

Customer:  You know...how much did the material cost, how much was the labor and how much did you make?

Me:  No. Pay me.

Customer:  I need to know how much you're making becuase this just seems too expensive.

Me:  <facepalm>

 

 

You should break into their house when they're gone and rip out all the shit you installed.  Or burn their house down.  Either one works for me and I would vote to acquit on your jury.

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13 minutes ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

You should break into their house when they're gone and rip out all the shit you installed.  Or burn their house down.  Either one works for me and I would vote to acquit on your jury.

I've had masons tell me about the old guys who upon receiving payment for services would climb to the top of chimney stacks, drop a brick down the flue, and break the pane of glass they'd installed during construction.

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9 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I've had masons tell me about the old guys who upon receiving payment for services would climb to the top of chimney stacks, drop a brick down the flue, and break the pane of glass they'd installed during construction.

If they got paid, I’m not voting to acquit those dudes.

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12 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I hope the inventor of Saran Wrap shares the same space in hell with whoever designs toy packaging

The Glad cling wrap is even worse. It inevitably gets stuck on itself on the roll and you’re left trying to pry it loose. I end up throwing the 2/3 roll away every time and vowing no never buy another. But then Mrs. NNM (no pics you sickos) buys another after a month or so and the problem repeats.
Leaving that extra info here because the stupid stuff wives do thread has been co-opted by guy grocery talk. 

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1 hour ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

I'm a paid subscriber to mlb.tv and there's a 15 sec ad in front of every fucking video, even those little 30 sec single highlight vids and there's no way to skip it.  If you want to make the poors that don't pay for a subscription sit through ads all day, fine.  But don't make those of us that are paying for it suffer as well.

Trivial, you bet.  Surly af, damn straight.  Checks all the boxes.

Freaking MLB tv being blacked out in Houston when you can’t attend a game even if you wanted to. 

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1 hour ago, nnm said:

Freaking MLB tv being blacked out in Houston when you can’t attend a game even if you wanted to. 

You could get a VPN for a few bucks a month and connect to a server outside of the Houston market.  But that would be cheating.

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2 minutes ago, shakahorn said:

You could get a VPN for a few bucks a month and connect to a server outside of the Houston market.  But that would be cheating.

Well...... he'd just be furthering the brand of current Houston baseball....  Sort of a cheaters homage if you will.

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On 7/28/2020 at 10:58 AM, nnm said:

That’s the first time I’ve ever seen or heard that phrase. So thanks for that. 

I've never heard it either. So:

 

Quote

The term `picking up pennies in front of a steamroller' is linked to Nassim Taleb, an acclaimed author on randomness and risk, whose books describe an investment strategy that has a high probability to yield a small return (pennies), and a small probability of a very large loss (steamroller).Jun 12, 2017

 

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4 hours ago, nnm said:

Freaking MLB tv being blacked out in Houston when you can’t attend a game even if you wanted to. 

Whats worse is they're blacked out in DFW too, but aren't on any local stations (The Rangers are on FSSW, so I can stream those). 

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Sending people (specifically smarty pants women) a turnkey bid to do work.  They accept after asking a myriad of questions which I answer to their satisfaction and then they sign on the dotted line.  We complete the work and invoice them per the contract.  Contract says "payment due upon completion" but payment is not made upon completion nor within a reasonable amount of time afterward.  Several weeks go by and a few phone calls are made with no answer by or return call from the customer.
Finally the customer answers the phone and is asked if there is a problem with making payment.
(now the fun stuff starts)
Customer (usually a  smarty pants woman):  Uh, yes,  I got your invoice.
Me: Is there a problem with the work?
Customer:  No. It looks great.  We couldn't be happier!
Me:  OK.  When can we excpet payment?
Customer:  Well.........I was looking at your invoice and I wanted to know why it is for so much money?  It seems too expensive.
Me:  The invoice is for the amount stated in and agreed to per contract and evidenced by your signature accepting the scope of work and the price.
Customer:  Well.....it still seems too expensive to me.
Me:  Then why did you accept and sign the contract then let us complete the work to your satisfaction and then complain about the price?
Customer: It just seems too expensive.  Can you "break it down for me?"  
Me:  "Break it down?"  What does that mean?
Customer:  You know...how much did the material cost, how much was the labor and how much did you make?
Me:  No. Pay me.
Customer:  I need to know how much you're making becuase this just seems too expensive.
Me: 
 
 

Sue. recover. Make sure judgment is recorded and fucks up credit for 7 years.

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26 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

I've never heard it either. So:

 

 

Yeah, the quote isn't that difficult to decipher.

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Posted (edited)

We're expecting some fucking thing or another related to our curtains, a year long project which has somehow become a long-haul beating of fucked up lunacy and incompetence. We're not being fussy - it's just taken this outfit that long to fully assemble a complete and working setup. It's a Kafkaesque nightmare. 

Anyway, look at the size of this envelope used to send the small bag of eye loop screws and nothing else. It's made out of brown grocery bag paper except 3-4x thicker. Beefy stock. 

And it's not even the right whatever last fucking thing we were expecting. If this was all we needed, I would have just gone to the hardware store. 

20200801_223837.jpg

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

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13 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I've had masons tell me about the old guys who upon receiving payment for services would climb to the top of chimney stacks, drop a brick down the flue, and break the pane of glass they'd installed during construction.

 

13 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

If they got paid, I’m not voting to acquit those dudes.

@Fudge Nuggets

I think that refers to the fact that the pane of glass was their payment guarantee. If they didn't get paid for their work, building the chimney, they would leave the pane of glass unbroken and the smoke would come back into the room. Once they got paid, the glass is broken and the chimney works as intended.

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3 minutes ago, Lone Star Horn said:

 

@Fudge Nuggets

I think that refers to the fact that the pane of glass was their payment guarantee. If they didn't get paid for their work, building the chimney, they would leave the pane of glass unbroken and the smoke would come back into the room. Once they got paid, the glass is broken and the chimney works as intended.

Yep. You don't pay your chimney may not work quite right. I thought it was brilliant, if true.

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13 hours ago, nnm said:

The Glad cling wrap is even worse. It inevitably gets stuck on itself on the roll and you’re left trying to pry it loose. I end up throwing the 2/3 roll away every time and vowing no never buy another. But then Mrs. NNM (no pics you sickos) buys another after a month or so and the problem repeats.
Leaving that extra info here because the stupid stuff wives do thread has been co-opted by guy grocery talk. 

If you're unable to properly tear a sheet using the serrated metal blade on the lid of the box then, yeah, you're going to have problems. That's step one in the proper use of plastic wrap. 

The roll can be removed from the box if you have an edge that gets stuck. That's easy to fix. I've struggled more to fix the same problem on a roll of toilet paper. Never had to throw a roll away. 

 

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8 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

We're expecting some fucking thing or another related to our curtains, a year long project which has somehow become a long-haul beating of fucked up lunacy and incompetence. We're not being fussy - it's just taken this outfit that long to fully assemble a complete and working setup. It's a Kafkaesque nightmare. 

Anyway, look at the size of this envelope used to send the small bag of eye loop screws and nothing else. It's made out of brown grocery bag paper except 3-4x thicker. Beefy stock. 

And it's not even the right whatever last fucking thing we were expecting. If this was all we needed, I would have just gone to the hardware store. 

20200801_223837.jpg

Why the $20 bill?  You buying some scooby snax?

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